Are You Listening?
A friend was working on our kitchen, using a hot glue gun that sets in
thirty seconds. I started a conversation that required a thoughtful
response. He was unsure what to do. If he paused for even 20 seconds
to answer me, he would probably have to throw away the pieces he had
carefully cut to fit. He had no more wood and a mistake would require
yet another trek to Home Depot. Still he did not want to ignore me
either.
" I can't talk right now." he blurted out.
I was oblivious to what he was juggling and went about my business.
Marriage Retreat in Seattle
We are excited to be leading a weekend at Mosswood Retreat Center the weekend of June 13th. Contact Rev Ethan McCardell or Lori and John Odhner for details.
Gift Giving for Dummies
I have a confession to make. Sometimes gift giving in our marriage is, well, prickly.
There was the time John gave me a mop for Christmas. I needed a mop, I admit, but seeing it’s plastic blue handle under the tree undermined my sense of peace and goodwill. He thought “This is to make your life easier!” I thought, “This is to get me to work harder.”
I am Sorry
Marriage is a wonderful opportunity to learn the fine art of apologizing. No matter how hard we may try to treat each other with kindness, there will be failures. Harshly spoken words, disrespectful actions and bitter behaviors can bring pain to a relationship. But there is healing in the effort to apologize, take ownership and change.
Apologies can be very simple while still being sincere and powerful. Miraculously, it can make not only the recipient but also the giver feel better.
There are elements that can make an apology more complete and honest. Here are some suggestions:
Life after Cancer: An Interview with Deno and Carol Brannon
If you were in charge of getting a family through a crisis that would extract every ounce of strength in their exhausted bodies, every teaspoon of compliance in their withered spirit, how would you do it?
Carol’s third oncologist, the one that reminds Deno of the original Penguin from Batman, put it this way, “I will put you through six months of hell for 30 years of health.”
So far he has been true to that promise.
Where You Live
Here is our latest video, thanks to Matt Childs!
Where You Live
Marriage Deserves Preparation
Join us for a series of classes for newly married or engaged couples as they look toward building a life together that benefits from preparation! We all do better when we know what lies ahead, and this class will go a long way in helping you see the road maps that keep you safely on the path. We meet at the Bryn Athyn Cathedral, from 7 -8:30 on the first Thursday of every month. There will be 6 classes, including Male/Female Differences, Communication, Where are You Going?, Investing in Your Marriage, and Solving Problems.
Marriage Retreat in Seattle
We are excited to be leading a weekend at Mosswood Retreat Center the weekend of June 13th. Contact Rev Ethan McCardell or Lori and John Odhner for details.
Perfect Christmas
You know the scenario. The house is decorated with ornaments and nativity sets collected over the years. The tree is a fragrant Scotch pine cut with your own saw on one of those family outings that ended with hot cocoa and buttered popcorn. The gifts are all within your budget, wrapped elegantly and thoughtfully chosen for each of the dozens of people on your list, from your mother in law to the kids' scout leader. All of the Christmas cards are neatly addressed and in the mail with personal notes and current photographs by the first week of December. Warm cookies and fudge fill the kitchen with good smells from the baskets you've prepared to hand out at church. These are the pictures of perfection that loom over us like commandants, barking behind us to march farther and try harder to achieve a moving target. We are enmeshed in the relentless drive to create the "Perfect Christmas". The failings are inevitable. Juice spills on the holiday tablecloth before we've even sat down. The pineapple upside down cake that I brought to the caroling party which the six year old was carrying is upside right on the sidewalk. Our daughter is sick and there are fifty people scheduled to arrive in an hour. These problems and a score of variations on the theme have appeared in my path over the years when I least expected it. I can't figure out why I am still naive enough to be surprised. After all the advent I am celebrating was anything but perfect. Mary's betrothal to Joseph was clouded when he planned to divorce her, until an angel beckoned him otherwise. Perhaps her idea of the "Perfect Wedding" was forfeited in the wake of Divine plans. She was compelled to travel to Bethlehem in her last weeks of pregnancy, a difficult and uncomfortable journey. There was no one to welcome them, indeed no room anywhere save a cold corner in the straw among the animals. Even after all these obstacles. the safety of Mary's infant was not assured. Herod's treacherous murder of hundreds of baby boys hovered like a shroud of fear and sorrow all around them as they escaped to a foreign country. Could anyone dare to christen this, the first, a "Perfect Christmas"? On a barometer of external safety, palatial accommodations or local popularity, the coming of Christ was a dismal disappointment. There were no parades, no parties, and probably no hot cocoa. Yet measured in terms of the invisible, the ineffable, this Child's entrance into our imperfect world birthed a bridge between the mire of earthly existence and the threshold of celestial shores.
