Married Love
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- Married Love
- The Delights of Wisdom relating to Married Love and the
Pleasures of Insanity relating to Licentious Love
by Emanuel SwedenborgTranslated by N. Bruce Rogers
from the Latin Delitiae
Sapientiae de Amore Conjugiali; post quas sequuntur Voluptates
Insaniae de Amore Scortatorio[Click on headings to hide or reveal contents.]
- The Delights of Wisdom relating to Married Love and the
- Part I: The Delights of Wisdom relating to Married Love
- 1. THE JOYS OF HEAVEN AND MARRIAGES THERE
-
- 1. [It Really Happened]
1. I anticipate that many who read the following descriptions
and the accounts at the ends of the succeeding chapters will
believe they are figments of my imagination. I swear in truth,
however, that they are not inventions, but actual occurrences to
which I was witness. Nor were they witnessed in any condition of
unconsciousness but in a state of full wakefulness. For it has
pleased the Lord to manifest Himself to me and send me to teach the
doctrines that will be doctrines of the New Church, the church
meant by the New Jerusalem in the book of Revelation. To this end
He has opened the inner faculties of my mind and spirit. As a
result, it has been made possible for me to be in the spiritual
world with angels and at the same time in the natural world with
men, and this now for twenty-five years.[*1][*1] This work was originally published in the year 1768.
- 1. [It Really Happened]
-
- 2. [An Angel Calls]
2. I once saw an angel flying beneath the eastern sky holding a
trumpet to his mouth, who sounded towards the north, towards the
west, and towards the south. He was wearing a cape which swept
backwards as he flew; and he was girded with a sash of garnets and
sapphires that seemed ablaze with fire and light.Flying in horizontal position, facing forward and down, he
slowly descended to the tract of ground surrounding me. Landing
upright upon his feet, he began to pace back and forth, and then
seeing me he headed in my direction. I was in the spirit, and in
this state was standing on a hill in the southern zone.When he drew near, I spoke to him and asked, “What is
happening? I heard the sound of your trumpet and saw you descending
through the air.”The angel answered, “I have been sent to call together
people most renowned for their learning, most discerning in their
brilliance, and foremost in their reputation for wisdom, who have
come from the kingdoms of the Christian world and are living in
this surrounding land. I have been sent to assemble them on this
hill where you are standing, to express their honest opinions as to
what they had thought, understood and perceived in the world
regarding heavenly joy and eternal happiness.[2] “The reason for my mission is that some newcomers from
the world, admitted into our heavenly society in the east, have
told us that not even one person in the whole Christian world knows
what heavenly joy and eternal happiness are, thus what heaven is.
My brothers and companions were very surprised at this, and they
said to me, “Go down, call together and assemble the wisest in
the world of spirits (the world into which all mortals are first
gathered after they leave the natural world) in order that we may
learn from the testimony of many whether it is true that Christians
are in such darkness and unenlightened ignorance concerning the
life to come.””He also added, “Wait here a little, and you will see
companies of the wise streaming here. The Lord is going to prepare
a hall of assembly for them.”[3] I waited, and behold, after half an hour I saw two bands of
people coming from the north, two from the west, and two from the
south. As they arrived, they were led by the angel with the trumpet
into the hall prepared for them, where they took places assigned to
them according to the zones they came from.They formed six groups or companies. A seventh came from the
east, but it was not visible to the others owing to the light.After they were assembled, the angel explained the reason they
had been called together, and he asked the companies to present in
turn their wisdom regarding heavenly joy and eternal happiness.
Each company then gathered into a circle, its members facing each
other, in order to recall the ideas they had acquired on the
subject in the previous world, to consider them now, and after
conferring to present their conclusion.
- 2. [An Angel Calls]
-
- 3. [The Six Companies]
3. After conferring, the first company, which came from the
north, said that heavenly joy and eternal happiness are the same as
the life of heaven. “Consequently,” they said, “everyone
who enters heaven enters with his life into its festivities, just
as one who enters into a wedding celebration enters into its
festivities. Is not heaven something we can see above us, thus
something that has location?[*1] There and nowhere else exists
bliss upon bliss and pleasure upon pleasure. On account of the
fullness of joys in that place, a person is introduced into this
bliss and pleasure with every perception of his mind and every
sensation of his body when he is introduced into heaven. Therefore
heavenly happiness, which is also eternal happiness, is simply
admission into heaven, and admission by Divine grace.”[2] Following that statement, the second company from the north
presented in accordance with its wisdom this conjecture: “Heavenly
joy and eternal happiness consist simply in delightful associations
with angels and enjoyable conversations with them, which keep the
countenance in continual expressions of gladness and the mouths of
all in pleasant laughter as a result of charming and witty
exchanges. What are heavenly joys but varying interchanges of this
sort to eternity?”[3] The third company, which was the first of the wise from the
western zone, expressed in accordance with the thoughts of its
members’ affections this opinion: “What else is heavenly joy
and eternal happiness but dining with Abraham, Isaac and Jacob,[*2]
at tables that will be set with rich delicacies and fine vintage
wines, followed by exhibitions and dances by young men and women
performed to the rhythms of stringed and wind instruments, and from
time to time the sweet singing of songs? And finally in the evening
there will be theatrical performances, and after that more dining.
And so on every day to eternity.”[4] After that pronouncement, the fourth company, the second
from the western zone, reported its verdict, saying, “We have
entertained many ideas with respect to heavenly joy and eternal
happiness, but having considered various kinds of joy and compared
them with each other, we have come to the conclusion that heavenly
joys are like those of a paradise. What else is heaven but a
paradise,[*3] stretching from east to west and from the south to
the north, containing fruit trees and delightful flowers, and in
their midst the magnificent tree of life, around which the blessed
will sit, feeding on fruits of exquisite flavor[*4] and adorned
with garlands of sweet-smelling flowers?“We conclude, too, that owing to a climate of endless
spring, these fruits and flowers are produced again and again
daily, with unlimited variety; and that because of their continual
production and growth, and at the same time the constantly
springlike temperature, minds and hearts cannot help but breathe in
and out new joys every day, being forever rejuvenated so as to
return to the flower of their youth and through this to the
pristine state into which Adam and his wife were created. Thus they
are restored to the paradise of old, transferred from earth to
heaven.”[5] The fifth company, which was the first of the brilliant from
the southern zone, declared the following: “Heavenly joys and
eternal happiness are nothing else but positions of great power,
possessions of great riches, and so superregal magnificence and
superglorious splendor. We have discerned that the joys of heaven
and the continual enjoyment of them (which is eternal happiness)
consist in such things from observing people in the previous world
who there possessed them. Furthermore, we know that the happy in
heaven will reign with the Lord and will be kings and princes,
because they are the sons of Him who is King of kings and Lord of
lords.[*5] Also that they will sit upon thrones, and that the
angels will minister to them.[*6]“As for the magnificence of heaven, we have discerned this
from the account of the New Jerusalem, by which the glory of heaven
is described, that it will have gates, each one of which will be
one pearl, and streets of pure gold, and a wall founded upon
precious stones.[*7] From this we conclude that everyone received
into heaven has his own palace of gold, resplendent with precious
things, and that the right of dominion will pass from one to
another in turn. And because we know that joys are intrinsic to
such things and happiness inherent in them, and that the promises
of God are unbreakable, we have been unable to trace the origin of
the most happy state of heavenly life from any other source.”[6] After this, the sixth company, the second from the southern
zone, raised its voice and said, “The joy of heaven and
eternal happiness there consist solely in a continual glorifying of
God, a religious celebration lasting to eternity, and blessed
worship with singing and exultation, resulting in constant
elevation of the heart to God, with full confidence in His
acceptance of prayers and praises offered in gratitude for His
Divine munificence in rendering the worshipers blessed.”Some members of the company added that this celebration would be
accompanied by magnificent lighting and sweet-smelling incense,
with solemn processions led by a high priest carrying a great
trumpet, followed by prelates and other clergy, great and small,
and behind them men with palm branches and women with golden images
in their hands.[*1] Cf. Matthew 22:1-14.
[*2] Cf. Matthew 8:11.
[*3] Cf. Luke 23:43, 2 Corinthians 12:2-4.
[*4] Cf. Revelation 2:7.
[*5] See John 1:12, Romans 8:14,16,17, Galatians 4:4-7, 2
Timothy 2:12, 1 John 3:1,2, Revelation 1:6, 5:10, 17:14, 19:16,
20:4,6, 22:5.[*6] See Matthew 19:28, Luke 22:29,30, Revelation 3:21; Hebrews
1:13,14.[*7] Revelation 21:18-21.
- 3. [The Six Companies]
-
- 4. [The Seventh Company]
4. The seventh company, invisible to the rest on account of the
light, was from the east part of heaven. Its members were angels
from the same society that the angel with the trumpet came from.
When they heard in their heaven that not even one person in the
Christian world knows what the joy of heaven and eternal happiness
are, they said to each other, “This cannot be true! Such great
darkness and numbness of mind is not possible among Christians. Let
us go down, too, and hear for ourselves whether it is so. If it is,
it is without doubt an astonishing event.”[2] These angels now said to the angel with the trumpet, “As
you know, everyone who has longed for heaven and has had some
particular opinion about the joys there, after death is introduced
into the joys of his imagination. Then when he has experienced what
those joys are like and found that they reflect empty theories or
his own irrational fantasies, he is afterwards taken out of them
and instructed. This happens with most in the world of spirits who
in their former life thought about heaven and came to some
conclusion respecting joys there to the point of longing for them.”Hearing this, the angel with the trumpet said to the six
companies assembled from the wise of the Christian world, “Follow
me and I will introduce you to your joys and so into heaven.”
- 4. [The Seventh Company]
-
- 5. [Conversations]
5. So saying, the angel led the way, accompanied first by the
company of those who had persuaded themselves that heavenly joys
consisted simply in delightful associations and enjoyable
conversations. The angel introduced them to gatherings in the
northern zone, comprised of people who in the former world had had
the same idea of the joys of heaven. There was a huge house there,
into which people like this were brought together. The house had
more than fifty rooms, each devoted to a different topic of
conversation.In some of the rooms they were talking about things they had
seen or heard in the public square and in the streets. In others
they were saying various amiable things about the fair sex,
interspersed with witty exchanges that kept increasing until the
faces of all in the gathering expanded into merry laughter. In
other rooms they were discussing news relating to the royal courts,
their ministries, the political condition, and various matters
emanating from the privy councils, with arguments and conjectures
regarding the outcomes. In other rooms the subject was business. In
others, scholarly matters. In others, concerns having to do with
citizenship and moral living. In others, affairs having to do with
the church and religious denominations. And so on.It was granted me to look into the house, and I saw people
running from room to room, looking for gatherings with their same
affection and so in harmony with their joy. In the gatherings I
also saw three kinds of people: some practically panting to speak,
some anxious to ask questions, and some eager to listen.[2] The house had four doors, one toward each of the four points
of the compass, and I noticed that many were leaving their
gatherings and hurrying to get out. Following several of these to
the east door, I saw a number of them sitting beside it with
downcast faces. I went over to them and asked why they were sitting
there so sadly.They answered, “The doors of this house are kept closed to
anyone trying to leave. It is now the third day since we arrived,
and having lived the life we longed for in socializing and
conversation, we have grown tired of the constant talk, to the
point that we can hardly bear to hear the murmur of sounds coming
from it. So, out of weariness and boredom we made our way to this
door and knocked. But we received the reply that the doors of this
house are not opened for people wishing to leave, only for those
wanting to enter. “Stay and enjoy the joys of heaven!” we
were told. From this response we concluded that we are to remain
here to eternity. Our minds were filled with dejection at this, and
now we are becoming oppressed at heart and taken with anxiety.”[3] The angel then spoke to them and said, “This state is
the state in which your joys die, joys you believed to be the only
heavenly joys, when in fact they are merely subsidiary adjuncts to
heavenly joys.”So they asked the angel, “What, then, is heavenly joy?”
The angel answered, briefly, “It is the pleasure of doing
something that is of use to oneself and to others, and the pleasure
in being useful takes its essence from love and its expression from
wisdom. The pleasure in being useful, springing from love through
wisdom, is the life and soul of all heavenly joys.[4] “Angels in heaven enjoy delightful associations which
stimulate their minds, gladden their spirits, gratify their hearts,
and recreate their bodies. But they enjoy these associations after
they have performed useful services in their occupations and
employments. The life and soul in all their delights and pleasures
comes from the useful services they perform. If you take away that
life or soul, however, the subsidiary joys gradually become no
longer joys, but first matters of indifference, then stupid, and
finally dreary and distressing.”With these words the door was opened, and the people sitting
there leapt up and fled away home, each one to his occupation and
employment, and so they were revitalized.
- 5. [Conversations]
-
- 6. [Feasting and Entertainment]
6. After this the angel spoke to the ones who had instilled in
themselves the idea that the joys of heaven and eternal happiness
would be dinners with Abram, Isaac and Jacob,[*1] followed by
exhibitions and shows and more dining, and so on to eternity. And
the angel said to them, “Follow me and I will introduce you to
the felicities of your joys.” He then led them through a grove
of trees to a level clearing overlaid with wooden boards on which
stood tables, fifteen on one side and fifteen on the other.And they asked, “Why so many tables?”
The angel answered that the first table was Abram’s, the second
Isaac’s, the third Jacob’s, and the tables after these, in order,
the tables of the twelve apostles. “And on the other side,”
he said, “are again as many tables belonging to their wives.
The first three are the tables of Sarah, Abram’s wife, of Rebekah,
Isaac’s wife, and of Leah and Rachel, the wives of Jacob. The
remaining twelve are the tables of the wives of the twelve
apostles.”[2] After some delay the tables all appeared filled with plates
of food, with the spaces between them decorated with little
pyramidal vessels containing condiments. Dinner guests were
standing around the tables awaiting the appearance of the hosts of
the tables. Following a short wait, the hosts appeared, entering in
order of procession from Abram to the last of the apostles. And
presently, going over to their tables, they each took a place on
the couch at the head of the table. Then they said to the people
standing about, “Recline here with us also.” And the men
reclined with the patriarchs and the women with the patriarchs’
wives, and they ate and they drank in gladness and with veneration.After the meal the patriarchs departed, and then the exhibitions
began – the dances of young men and women, and afterwards shows.When these came to an end, the guests were again invited to
dine, but with the stipulation that those who on the first day ate
with Abram, on the second would dine with Isaac, on the third with
Jacob, on the fourth with Peter, on the fifth with James, on the
sixth with John, on the seventh with Paul, and so on with the rest
in order until the fifteenth day, whereupon they would change seats
and begin the dinner parties again in the same sequence, and so on
to eternity.[3] At this point the angel called together the men of the
company and said to them, “All these people that you saw at
the tables had the same imaginary idea of the joys of heaven and
consequent eternal happiness that you did. So in order that they
may see the foolishness of their ideas and be weaned from them,
dinner scenes like this have been instituted and have been
permitted by the Lord. The leaders you saw at the heads of the
tables were actors playing old men, most of them from a backward
people, who let their beards grow and developed a haughtiness over
the rest on account of their possessing a certain wealth. A fantasy
has been produced them that they are those patriarchs.“But follow me to the paths leading out of this arena.”
[4] So they followed, and they saw fifty people here and fifty
there, people who had stuffed their bellies with food to the point
of nausea, and who longed to return to the familiar settings of
their homes, some to their professional duties, some to their
businesses, and some to their employments. But the guards of the
grove detained many of them and interrogated them about the days of
their dining, as to whether they had eaten yet at the tables of
Peter and Paul, telling them that if they were leaving before doing
so, it would be to their disgrace, because it was impolite.But most of them answered, “We have had enough of our joys.
The food has become tasteless to us and our ability to taste has
run dry. Our stomachs are sick of food. We cannot bear to taste it.
Having dragged out several days and nights in this dissipation, we
earnestly beg to be released.”And being released, with panting breath and hurried step they
fled away home.[5] Afterwards the angel called the men of the company and on
the way explained to them the following things about heaven:“In heaven they have food and drink just as in the world,
also dinner parties and festive meals. And in the homes of the
leading citizens there they have tables set with rich, choice and
exquisite foods, which enliven and refresh their spirits. They also
have exhibitions and shows, and instrumental and vocal musical
performances, all in the highest perfection. Such things, too, they
regard as joys, but not as happiness. Happiness must be in the joys
in order to come from the joys. Happiness in the joys causes the
joys to be joys. It enriches them and sustains them so that they do
not become common and loathsome. This happiness everyone has from
being useful in his occupation.[6] “Latent in the affection of every angel’s will is a
certain inner tendency which draws the mind to accomplish
something. By accomplishment the mind finds peace and satisfaction.
This satisfaction and peace produce a state of mind receptive of a
love of useful service from the Lord. From the reception of this
love comes heavenly happiness, which is the life in the joys just
referred to.“Heavenly food in its essence is nothing else than love,
wisdom and useful service combined, that is, useful service
accomplished through wisdom out of love. Consequently in heaven
everyone is given food for the body in accordance with the useful
service he performs – magnificent food in the case of those engaged
in outstanding service, modest food but of excellent flavor and
taste in the case of those in an intermediate degree of useful
service, and humble food in the case of those in humble service,
while the lazy receive none.”[*1] Cf. Matthew 8:11.
- 6. [Feasting and Entertainment]
-
- 7. [Power and Wealth]
7. After that the angel called to himself the company of the
so-called wise who had placed heavenly joys, and because of them
eternal happiness, in positions of great power, possessions of
great riches, and so superregal magnificence and superglorious
splendor, because it says in the Word that they will be kings and
princes,[*1] that they will reign with Christ to eternity,[*2] and
that the angels will minister to them,[*3] among other things.The angel said to them, “Follow me and I will introduce you
to your joys.” And he led them to a gallery constructed out of
columns and pyramidal piers. In front of it was a humble palace,
through which the entrance to the gallery opened. The angel led
them through the palace, and behold, they saw people waiting,
twenty here and twenty there. Then suddenly an actor appeared,
playing the part of an angel, who said to them, “The way to
heaven lies through this gallery. Wait here a little while and
prepare yourselves, because the older ones among you are going to
become kings and the younger princes.”[2] At these words a throne appeared next to each column, with a
silk robe upon the throne, and upon the robe a scepter and crown.
And next to each pier appeared a chair of state raised three
cubits[*4] from the ground, with a chain made of links of gold upon
the chair and sashes of knighthood fastened at the ends with
circlets of diamonds. Then the proclamation rang out, “Go now,
dress yourselves, take your seats, and wait!”And instantly the older ones ran to the thrones and the younger
ones to the chairs of state, and they dressed themselves and took
their seats.But then a kind of mist appeared rising from below, which the
people sitting upon the thrones and chairs of state breathed in,
and because of it their faces began to swell and their chests to
rise, and they became filled with confidence that they were now
kings and princes. The mist was an aura of fantasy, with which they
were infused.And suddenly young men flew to their sides, as though from
heaven, and they stood two behind each throne and one behind each
chair of state, to serve in attendance on them. Then from time to
time some herald would cry out, “You kings and princes, wait a
little while longer. Your courts are now being prepared in heaven.
Your courtiers will arrive presently with attendants to conduct
you.”They waited and waited, until their spirits were panting and
they grew weary with longing.[3] After three hours heaven opened above their heads and angels
looked down, and taking pity on them the angels said, “Why are
you sitting there so foolishly and behaving like play-actors? They
are playing games with you and have turned you from men into idols,
because you have instilled in your hearts that you will reign with
Christ as kings and princes and that angels will then minister to
you. Have you forgotten the Lord’s words, that in heaven whoever
desires to be great becomes a servant?[*5]“Learn therefore what is meant by kings and princes and by
reigning with Christ. It means to be wise and perform useful
services. For the kingdom of Christ, namely, heaven, is a kingdom
of useful services. The reason is that the Lord loves all people
and so wills good to all, and good means useful service. Now
because the Lord performs good or useful services indirectly
through angels, and in the world through people, therefore to those
who faithfully perform useful services He gives a love of being
useful and its reward. The reward is internal blessedness, and this
blessedness is eternal happiness.[4] “Positions of great power and possessions of great
riches exist in heaven as well as on earth, for they have
governments and forms of government in heaven and so also greater
and lesser positions of power and rank. Moreover, people who are in
the highest positions have palaces and courts which surpass in
magnificence and splendor the palaces and courts of emperors and
kings on earth. And because of the number of their courtiers,
ministers and attendants and the magnificent vestments in which
these are appareled, they are surrounded with honor and glory.“Yet the people in the highest positions are chosen from
those whose heart is in the public welfare, and only their bodily
senses in the grandeur of magnificence for the sake of being
obeyed. And because it contributes to the public welfare for
everyone to be of some useful service in society, as in a common
body, and because all useful service comes from the Lord and is
rendered through angels and men as though from them, it is evident
that this is what it is to reign with the Lord.”When they heard these words from heaven, the people playing at
being kings and princes descended from their thrones and chairs of
state and threw away their scepters, crowns and robes. And the mist
which contained the aura of fantasy receded from them, and a bright
cloud enveloped them, which contained an aura of wisdom. So sanity
returned to their minds.[*1] See Revelation 1:6, 5:10.
[*2] 2 Timothy 2:12, Revelation 5:10, 20:4,6, 22:5.
[*3] See Hebrews 1:13,14.
[*4] About four and a half feet.
[*5] Matthew 20:26,27, 23:11, Mark 9:35, 10:43.
- 7. [Power and Wealth]
-
- 8. [A Garden Paradise]
8. After this the angel returned to the house where the wise
from the Christian world were assembled, and he called to him those
who had instilled in themselves the belief that the joys of heaven
and eternal happiness were the delights of a paradise.He said to them, “Follow me and I will introduce you to
paradise, your heaven, so that you may start on the blessings of
your eternal happiness.” And he led them through a high
gateway constructed out of the interwoven branches and boughs of
stately trees. Beyond the entrance he led them around through
winding paths from place to place.It was, in fact, an actual paradise at the first entrance to
heaven, to which people are admitted who in the world had believed
that the whole of heaven is a single paradise, because it is called
Paradise,[*1] and who had fixed in themselves the idea that after
death they would find complete rest from their labors, rest that
would consist solely in breathing in delightful essences, walking
on rose petals, enjoying the delicate juices of grapes, and
partaking of liquid refreshments at festive parties, a way of life
they believed possible only in a heavenly paradise.[2] Led by the angel they saw an immense number of people – of
men, old and young, and boys, and also women and girls. Some of
them were sitting by beds of roses, in groups of three and groups
of ten, weaving garlands with which to adorn the heads of the older
men, the arms of the youths, and – as though with sashes – the
breasts of the boys. Other groups were picking fruits from the
trees and carrying them in baskets to their companions. Others were
pressing the juice from grapes, cherries and berries into cups and
good-naturedly drinking. Others were breathing in and smelling the
wafting aromas given off by the flowers, fruits and fragrant
leaves. Others were singing sweet songs with which they delighted
the ears of those present. Others were sitting at fountains and
spraying the jets of water into various patterns. Others were
walking, talking and exchanging pleasantries. Others were running,
playing, and dancing, sometimes in sets, and sometimes in circles.
Others were going into garden houses to lie down on the couches.
And so on with other pleasures suitable to a paradise.[3] After they had viewed these scenes, the angel led his
companions along by-paths here and there, and finally to some
people sitting in a beautiful rose garden surrounded by olive
trees, orange trees, and citrons. Rocking back and forth, they sat
with their cheeks in their hands, grieving and weeping. The
companions of the angel spoke to them and said, “Why are you
sitting here like this?”And they replied, “It is now the seventh day since we came
into this paradise. When we arrived it seemed as though our minds
had been raised into heaven and admitted into the inmost blessings
of its joys. But after three days these blessings began to grow
dull and vanish in our minds, becoming no longer perceptible and so
no longer blessings. And when our imagined joys thus died, we
became afraid of losing all delight in our lives, and we started to
doubt whether there is any eternal happiness.“Moreover, we then wandered about through the paths and
areas to look for the gate through which we entered. But we went
around and around in circles. When we asked the people we met, some
of them said the gate is never found, because this garden paradise
is an immense maze, of the sort that if anyone tries to leave, he
goes in deeper. “Consequently you have no choice but to remain
here to eternity,” we were told. “You are at the center
of the paradise, where all its delights are at their focus.””And they said further to the companions of the angel, “We
have been sitting here now for a day and a half. And because we
have lost hope of finding the way out, we have set ourselves down
by this rose garden, and we look about us at the abundance of olive
trees, grapes, oranges, and citrons. But the more we look at them,
the wearier our eyes grow of seeing them, our noses of smelling
them, and our mouths of tasting them. This is the reason for the
sorrow, grief and tears in which you see us.”[4] On hearing this, the angel with the company said to them,
“This maze or paradise actually is an entrance into heaven. I
know the way out and will take you.”At that, the people sitting there got up and embraced the angel,
and went with him along with his company. And on the way the angel
explained to them what heavenly joy and so eternal happiness are,
saying that they are not the outward delights of a paradise unless
they include at the same time the inward delights of a paradise.“The outward delights of a paradise,” he said, “are
only delights of the physical senses, while the inward delights of
a paradise are delights of the affections of the soul. Unless the
inward delights are in the outward, there is no heavenly life,
because the soul is not in them, and every delight without its
corresponding soul at once grows weak and dull, wearying the mind
more than labor. Garden paradises exist everywhere in the heavens,
and they are also sources of joy to the angels, but the joys are
joys to the angels to the degree that a delight of the soul is in
them.”[5] When they heard this, they all asked, “What is a
delight of the soul, and where does it come from?”The angel answered, “Delight of the soul comes from love
and wisdom from the Lord. And because love is creative of effects,
and is effective through wisdom, therefore the abode of both love
and wisdom is in the effect, and the effect is useful service. This
delight flows from the Lord into the soul, and it descends through
the higher and lower regions of the mind into all the senses of the
body and fulfills itself in them. Joy becomes joy from this, and it
becomes eternal from Him who is its eternal source.“You have seen what paradise holds, but I assure you that
there is not one thing there, not even a tiny leaf, that does not
originate from a marriage of love and wisdom in useful service.
Consequently if a person is in this marriage, he is in a heavenly
paradise, thus in heaven.”[*1] Luke 23:43, 2 Corinthians 12:2-4.
- 8. [A Garden Paradise]
-
- 9. [Glorifying God]
9. After that the angel guide returned to the hall, to the ones
who had firmly persuaded themselves that heavenly joy and eternal
happiness are a continual glorifying of God and a religious
celebration lasting to eternity, because in the world they had
believed that then they would see God, and because the life of
heaven is called a perpetual Sabbath on account of its worship of
God.To them the angel said, “Follow me and I will introduce you
to your joy.” And he led them to a small city, in the middle
of which was a temple, and all the houses were called sacred halls.In that city they saw a flood of people from every corner of the
surrounding land, and among them a number of priests. The priests
met and greeted the people as they arrived and, taking them by the
hand, led them to the doors of the temple and from there to some of
the buildings around the temple. Then they introduced them into a
never-ending worship of God, saying that this city was a forecourt
to heaven, and that the temple of the city was an introduction to
the magnificent and grand temple existing in heaven, where God is
glorified by the angels with prayers and praises to eternity.“The rules,” they said, “both here and there, are
that people must first enter the temple and stay there three days
and three nights. Then after that initiation they must go into the
houses of the city (all of them sacred halls that we have
sanctified), and passing from building to building, in communion
with the congregations there they must pray, cry out, and deliver
sermons.“Above all,” they said, “be careful that you do
not think to yourselves or say to your companions anything that is
not reverent, pious and religious.”[2] Afterwards the angel led his company into the temple. It was
packed full of people, many of whom had been in high position in
the world, and also many who had been of the common people.
Moreover, guards had been stationed at the doors to prevent anyone
from leaving before his three days were up.Then the angel said, “Today is the second day since these
people came in. Look at them and you will see their glorifying of
God.”So they looked, and they saw most of the people sleeping, and
the ones who were awake kept yawning and yawning. Furthermore,
because of the continual elevation of their thoughts to God without
returning again back down into the body, some of them appeared to
have faces separated from their bodies, for that is how they seemed
to themselves, and so that is how they appeared to others as well.
Some looked wild-eyed from constantly averting their gaze.In short, they all looked oppressed at heart and weary in spirit
with boredom, and turning away from the pulpit they began crying,
“Our ears are growing numb! Put an end to your sermons! No one
is listening to a word any more, and the very sound is becoming
detestable.”And then they got up and rushed en masse to the doors, broke
them open, and pressing upon the guards drove them away.[3] Seeing this, the priests followed them and attached
themselves to their sides, preaching and teaching, praying,
sighing, and saying, “Join in the religious celebration!
Glorify God! Sanctify yourselves! In this forecourt of heaven we
will prepare you for the eternal glorifying of God in the
magnificent and grand temple which is in heaven, that you may enter
the enjoyment of eternal happiness.”But the people did not understand and scarcely even heard what
the priests were saying, owing to their numbness from having their
minds suspended for two days and from being withheld from their
domestic and occupational concerns.When they tried to pull away from the priests, however, the
priests took hold of their arms and also their garments, urging
them to the halls where the sermons were to be delivered. But in
vain. And the people began crying out, “Leave us alone. Our
bodies feel as though we are about to faint!”[4] At these words, behold, four men appeared in bright white
clothing and wearing miters. One of them had been an archbishop in
the world, and the other three, bishops. Now they had become
angels.They called together the priests and addressing them said, “From
heaven we have seen you with your flock and how you feed them. You
feed them to insanity! You do not know what is meant by glorifying
God. It means to bring forth the fruits of love, that is, to
perform the work of one’s occupation faithfully, honestly, and
diligently. For this is the effect of love of God and love of the
neighbor, and it is what binds society together and makes its
goodness. It is by this that God is glorified, and afterwards by
worship at prescribed times. Have you not read these words of the
Lord:By this My Father is glorified, that you bear much fruit and
become My disciples. (John 15:8)[5] “You priests can go on glorifying in worship because it
is your profession, and from it you have honor, glory and
remuneration. But even you could not go on glorifying like that any
more than they if honor, glory and remuneration did not come with
your office.”So saying, the bishops ordered the keepers of the doors to let
everyone pass in and out. “For,” they said, “there
is a host of people who have been unable to imagine any other
heavenly joy than everlasting worship of God, because they have
known nothing about the state of heaven.” - 10. [Just Getting In]
10. After this the angel returned with his companions to the
place of assembly, which the companies of the wise had not yet
left, and there he called to him the ones who believed that
heavenly joy and eternal happiness are simply admission into
heaven, and admission by Divine grace, thinking that then they
would have joy, as people do in the world who are admitted into the
courts of kings on days of celebration or who are admitted by
invitation to the celebration of a wedding.To them the angel said, “Wait here a while, and I will
sound my trumpet, and some distinguished people will come to this
hall who are renowned for their wisdom in spiritual matters
connected with the church.”Several hours later nine men appeared, each wreathed with laurel
as a mark of his reputation. The angel led them into the hall of
assembly, where all those previously called together were waiting.Addressing the nine laureates in their presence, the angel said,
“I know that in answer to your prayer in accordance with your
belief, it was granted you to ascend into heaven, and that you have
returned to this lower or subcelestial land with full knowledge
regarding the state of heaven. Tell us, therefore, what heaven
seemed like to you.”[2] Then they replied in turn, and the first of them said, “From
earliest childhood to the end of my life in the world my idea of
heaven had been that it was a place of all blessings, felicities,
delights, gratifications, and pleasures. And I thought that if I
should be allowed in, I would be surrounded with an atmosphere of
enjoyments of this sort and would drink them in with full breast,
like a bridegroom when he celebrates his wedding and enters the
marriage chamber with his bride.“With this idea I ascended into heaven, and I passed the
first sentries and also the second, but when I came to the third,
the captain of the guard spoke to me and said, “Who are you,
friend?”“So I replied, “Is this heaven? I have longed and
prayed for it and therefore I have come up here. Please let me in.”
And he let me in.“And I saw angels in white garments. And surrounding me and
looking me over, and they began to murmur, “Look, a new
visitor not dressed in a garment of heaven.”“Hearing this, I thought to myself, “It appears I am
in a similar situation as the one who the Lord says went to a
wedding without a wedding garment.”[*1] So I said, “Give
me such garments.”“But they laughed. And then one of them came running from
the court with the order, “Strip him naked, throw him out, and
throw his clothes out after him.”[*2] And so I was thrown
out.”[3] The second of the laureates in turn said, “I believed
as he did, that if I should only be let into heaven (heaven being
above my head), I would be surrounded with joys and breathe them in
to eternity. I, too, got my wish. But when the angels saw me, they
fled away, and they said to each other, “What monstrosity is
this? How did this bird of the night get here?”“And I actually felt a change in myself from being human,
even though I was not changed. It was an effect I experienced from
breathing in the heavenly atmosphere.“But presently one of them came running from the court with
an order for two servants to lead me away and take me back by the
way I had ascended till I reached my home. And once I was home I
appeared to myself and others as a human being.”[4] The third laureate said, “I constantly thought of
heaven in terms of a place and not in terms of love. Therefore when
I arrived in this world, I longed for heaven with a great longing.
And seeing others ascending, I followed them and was let in, though
no more than a few paces.“But when I went to enjoy myself in accordance with my idea
of the joys and blessings there, the light of heaven (which was as
white as snow and whose essence is said to be wisdom) caused a
numbness to seize my mind and then darkness my eyes, and I began to
lose my reason. And shortly the heat of heaven (which matched in
intensity the brightness of its light and whose essence is said to
be love) caused my heart to pound, and I was seized with anxiety,
and being tormented by an inward pain, I threw myself flat on my
back on the ground.“Then as I lay there, an attendant came from the court with
an order for them to carry me down slowly into my own light and
heat, on reaching which, my spirit and my heart were restored to
me.”[5] The fourth laureate said that he, too, had thought of heaven
in terms of a place and not in terms of love. “And as soon as
I arrived in the spiritual world,” he said, “I asked the
wise whether I might be allowed to ascend into heaven. They told me
that everyone is allowed to, but people should beware of being cast
down.“I laughed at this and ascended, believing as others do
that all in the entire world are capable of receiving the joys
there in their fullness.“But in fact, once I was in, I almost died, and from pain
and then torment in head and body, I flung myself to the ground,
and writhing like a snake held next to a fire, I wriggled along to
a precipice and threw myself over the edge.“Afterwards I was taken up by some bystanders below and
carried to an inn, where I was restored to health.”[6] The five remaining laureates also told surprising tales
about their attempts to ascend into heaven. And they likened the
changes they experienced in the state of their lives to the state
of fish lifted out of the water into the air, and to the state of
birds in outer space.They said further that after those harsh experiences they no
longer yearned for heaven, but only for a life shared in common
with people like themselves, wherever they may be. Moreover, they
know that in the world of spirits, “where we are now,”
they said, all are first prepared, the good for heaven and the evil
for hell, and that when they have been prepared, they see paths
opened to them leading to societies of people like themselves, with
whom they will remain to eternity; and that they then enter upon
these paths with delight, because they lead in the direction of
their love.Hearing these accounts, the people who had been called together
originally all confessed as well that the only idea they, too, had
had of heaven was an idea of some place, where with open mouth they
would drink their fill of the surrounding joys to eternity.[7] Afterwards the angel with the trumpet said to them, “You
see now that the joys of heaven and eternal happiness do not have
to do with location, but with the state of a person’s life. The
state of heavenly life comes from love and wisdom. And because
useful service is the containing vessel of both love and wisdom,
the state of heavenly life comes from a combination of these two in
useful service.“It is the same if we use the terms charity, faith, and
good work, since charity is love, faith is truth that results in
wisdom, and good work is useful service.“Furthermore, in our spiritual world we have locations just
as in the natural world. Otherwise we would not have dwellings and
separate places to stay. Still a location there is not a place, but
it is an appearance of place according to some state of love and
wisdom or of charity and faith.[8] “Everyone who becomes an angel carries his own heaven
within him, because he carries the love that belongs to his heaven.
For man from creation is a little effigy, image and replica of the
larger heaven. The human form is nothing else. Therefore everyone
comes into a society of heaven of which he is a form in individual
effigy. Consequently when he comes into that society, he enters
into a form corresponding to himself, thus passing as if out of
himself into that larger self, and entering as if from that larger
self into the same self within him, so that he draws its life as
his own, and his own life as life belonging to it.“Every society is like a whole unit, and the angels in it
like similar parts out of which the whole is formed.“From this it now follows that people who are caught up in
evils and their resulting falsities have formed in themselves an
effigy of hell, and this effigy suffers torment in heaven as a
result of the activity flowing in and the violent action of
opposite upon opposite. For hellish love is opposed to heavenly
love, and consequently the delights of the two loves clash with
each other like enemies and destroy each other when they meet.”[*1] Matthew 22:11,12.
[*2] Cf. Matthew 22:13.
- 9. [Glorifying God]
-
- 11. [Up the Mountain]
11. Following these events, a voice was heard out of heaven
saying to the angel with the trumpet, “Choose ten of all the
people assembled and bring them to us. We have heard from the Lord
that He will prepare them so that the heat and light, or love and
wisdom, of our heaven will not do them any harm for three days.”So the angel chose ten, and they followed him. And they ascended
by a steep path to a certain hilltop, and from there to a
mountaintop, on which those angels had their heaven, which before
had appeared to them in the distance like an expanse in the clouds.
The gates were also opened for them, and after they passed the
third of these, the angel guide hurried to the prince of that
society or heaven and reported their arrival.And the prince replied, “Take some of my attendants and
report to the visitors that I welcome their arrival, and bring them
to my outer hall and assign each of them his apartment with his
bedroom. Take some of my courtiers and servants, too, to wait on
them and serve them at their bidding.”And so it was done.
However, when the angel brought them to the outer hall, they
asked whether they might go and see the prince, and the angel
answered, “It is now morning and visits are not allowed before
noon. Till then they are all engaged in their official duties and
employments. But you are invited to the midday luncheon, and then
you will sit down to dine with our prince. Meanwhile, I will take
you into the palace, where you will see magnificent and splendid
things.”
- 11. [Up the Mountain]
-
- 12. [A Magnificent Palace]
12. As they were being taken to the palace, they first viewed it
from the outside. It was large, built out of porphyry, with a
foundation of jasper, and in front of the entrance there were six
tall columns of lapis lazuli. Its roof was covered with sheets of
gold. Its high windows were made of the clearest crystal, and their
frames were also of gold.After this they were ushered into the palace and taken around
from room to room, and they saw ornaments of indescribable beauty,
with carvings beyond imitation decorating the ceilings. Positioned
along the walls they saw tables of silver mixed with gold, and on
them various utensils made of precious stones and of whole gems in
heavenly forms. They also saw many other things which no eye on
earth had ever seen, and consequently no one could ever have
persuaded himself to believe that such things exist in heaven.[2] As they stood in amazement at these magnificent sights, the
angel said, “Do not marvel. The wonders you see were not made
or crafted by the hand of any angel, but were fashioned by the
Maker of the Universe and given as a gift to our prince. Therefore
architectural art exists here in its quintessential form, and from
it come all the rules of the same art in the world.”The angel said further, “You may suppose that wonders like
these enchant our eyes and captivate them to the point that we
believe them to be the joys of our heaven. But since our hearts do
not lie in them, they are only subsidiary adjuncts to the joys of
our hearts. As a result, to the extent that we view them as
subsidiary adjuncts, and as works of God, to that extent we view in
them the Divine omnipotence and benevolence.”
- 12. [A Magnificent Palace]
-
- 13. [A Garden Paradise]
13. After that the angel said to them, “It is not yet noon.
Come with me to our prince’s garden, adjacent to this palace.”So they went, and at the entrance he said, “Look, the most
magnificent garden in this heavenly society!”But they replied, “What do you mean? This is not a garden.
We see only one tree, with what appear to be fruits of gold on its
branches and at the top, and what seem to be leaves of silver,
whose edges are adorned with emeralds. And under the tree we see
children with their nursemaids.”At this the angel said with inspired voice, “This tree is
in the middle of the garden. We call it the tree of our heaven, and
some call it the tree of life. But go, get closer, and your eyes
will be opened and you will see the garden.”So they did so. And their eyes were opened, and they saw trees
loaded with flavorful fruits and covered with leafy vines, the tops
of which swayed with their fruits towards the tree of life in the
center.[2] These trees had been planted in a continuous series which
went out and around in perpetual circles or rings, in a seemingly
endless spiral. It was a perfect spiral of trees, with one species
following another in unbroken succession in the order of the
excellence of their fruits. The beginning of the spiral started at
a considerable distance from the tree in the middle, and the
intervening space was lit up by a sparkling stream of light, which
caused the trees in the spiral to shine with a successive and
continued radiance from the first to the last of them.The first trees were the most excellent of them all, abounding
with rich fruits, and called trees of paradise, which the visitors
had never seen because these trees do not and cannot exist in the
lands of the natural world. After them came trees whose fruits are
used in the production of oil. Next, trees whose fruits are used in
making wine. Then trees marked by their fragrance. And finally
timber trees whose wood is used in construction.Here and there in this spiral or circular course of trees were
places to sit, formed by the trained and interwoven branches of the
trees behind them, and loaded and adorned with their fruits. This
unending circle of trees had openings which led out into flower
gardens, and from these to lawns, divided into areas and beds.[3] Seeing all this, the companions of the angel exclaimed,
“Look, a model of heaven! Wherever we turn the gaze of our
eyes, some sight of a heavenly paradise comes flooding in that is
beyond description!”On hearing this the angel rejoiced and said, “All the
gardens of our heaven are, in their origin, representative forms or
images of heavenly blessings. And because your minds were elevated
by the flowing in of these blessings, you cried out, “Look, a
model of heaven!” But people who do not receive that influx
see these sights of paradise simply as woodsy scenes. Moreover, all
people receive the influx who are motivated by a love of being
useful. But people who are motivated by a love of glory, and this
not for the sake of any useful purpose, do not receive it.”Afterwards the angel explained to them and taught them what each
thing in the garden represented and symbolized.
- 13. [A Garden Paradise]
-
- 14. [Dining with the Prince]
14. While they were thus engaged, a messenger arrived from the
prince, who invited them to break bread with him. And at the same
time two attendants of the court brought linen garments and said,
“Put these on, because no one is allowed at the table of the
prince without being dressed in the garments of heaven.”So they girded themselves and accompanied their angel, and they
were led into a cloister, the enclosed courtyard of the palace,
where they waited for the prince. And the angel introduced them
there into gatherings that included dignitaries and officials who
were also awaiting the prince.Then behold, a short while later the doors were opened, and
through one broader doorway on the west side they saw the prince
entering in the line of a grand procession. Preceding him were the
privy councillors. After these came the cabinet councillors, and
behind them the principal officials of the court. In the middle of
them was the prince, followed by courtiers of various distinction
and finally attendants. All told, they numbered up to one hundred
and twenty persons.[2] Standing before the ten newcomers (who by their dress then
looked like residents), the angel went with them to the prince and
respectfully presented them. And the prince without pausing in the
procession said to them, “Come take bread with me.”So they followed into the dining hall, where they saw a table
magnificently set. In the center of the table they saw a high
pyramid of gold with a hundred saucers in three rows upon its
tiers, containing cakes and wine jellies, along with other
delicacies made from cake and wine. And up through the middle of
the pyramid gushed what appeared to be a spurting fountain of
nectarlike wine, whose stream sprayed out from the top of the
pyramid and filled the goblets.Around the sides of this high pyramid were various heavenly
forms of gold, holding plates and dishes filled with all sorts of
foods. The heavenly forms holding the plates and dishes were forms
of art arising from wisdom, forms which in the world cannot be
depicted in any field of art or described in words. The plates and
dishes were made of silver, engraved all around their surface with
forms like the forms on which they rested. The goblets were made of
translucent gems.That was how the table was set.
- 14. [Dining with the Prince]
-
- 15. [The Garments of Heaven]
15. The dress of the prince and his ministers, moreover, was as
follows. The prince wore a full-length purple robe decorated with
embroidered silver-colored stars. Under the robe he had on a blue
tunic of shiny silk. It was open around the chest, revealing the
front part of a kind of cummerbund bearing the emblem of his
society. The emblem was an eagle brooding over her young at the top
of a tree. It was made of gleaming gold bordered with diamonds.The privy councillors were dressed in almost the same manner,
but without the emblem. Instead of the emblem they had carved
sapphires hanging from the neck by a golden chain. The courtiers
were in gowns of a light brown color, inwoven with flowers
surrounding young eaglets. Their tunics underneath were of silk
having an opalescent color. So, too, were their breeches and
stockings.That was what their dress was like.
- 15. [The Garments of Heaven]
-
- 16. [The Prince Speaks]
16. The privy councillors, cabinet councillors and officials
were standing around the table, and at the bidding of the prince
they folded their hands and murmured together a prayer of praise to
the Lord. After this at a sign from the prince they took their
places on the couches at the table. Then the prince said to the ten
visitors, “Recline here with me also. See, there are your
seats.”So they reclined, and the courtiers previously sent by the
prince to wait on them stood in attendance behind them.Then the prince said to them, “Take a plate, each of you,
from its serving ring and afterwards a saucer from the pyramid.”So they did so, and behold, immediately new plates and saucers
appeared, taking the place of the ones they removed. And their
goblets were kept filled with wine by the fountain spurting from
the great pyramid. So they ate and they drank.[2] Halfway through the meal, the prince spoke to the ten guests
and said, “I have heard that you were called together in the
land which is below this heaven, to reveal your thoughts about the
joys of heaven and so eternal happiness, and that you presented
divergent views, each according to the delights of his physical
senses.“But what are delights of the physical senses apart from
delights of the soul? It is the soul that makes them delightful.“Delights of the soul in themselves are imperceptible
states of bliss, but they become more and more perceptible as they
descend into the thoughts of the mind and from these into the
sensations of the body. In the thoughts of the mind they are
perceived as states of happiness, in the sensations of the body as
delights, and in the body itself as pleasures.“Eternal happiness results from all these combined. But
happiness resulting from the latter delights and pleasures alone is
not eternal but temporary. It comes to an end and passes away, and
sometimes turns into unhappiness.“You have now seen that all your joys are also joys of
heaven, joys more excellent than you ever could have imagined. But
even so, they still do not affect our minds inwardly.[3] “There are three things which flow as one from the Lord
into our souls. These three things together, or this trinity, are
love, wisdom, and usefulness. Love and wisdom, however, do not
occur by themselves except in imagination, because by themselves
they exist only in the affection and thought of the mind. In useful
service, on the other hand, they exist in actuality, because they
exist at the same time in the action and activity of the body. And
where they exist actually, there they also remain.“Now because love and wisdom exist and endure in useful
service, it is useful service that affects us, and useful service
is to carry out the duties of one’s occupation faithfully, honestly
and diligently.“The love of being useful, and its consequent application
in useful service, keeps the mind from being dissipated and
wandering, and from taking in all sorts of seductions which pour in
alluringly through the senses from the body and from the world. As
a result of these seductions, the truths of religion and the truths
of morality are scattered with their goodness to the four winds. In
contrast, application of the mind in useful service holds these
truths and anchors them, and orders the mind into a form receptive
of wisdom as a consequence of them. Moreover, the mind then thrusts
aside the shams and pretenses of both falsities and illusions.“But you will hear more about this from some of the wise of
our society, whom I will send to you this afternoon.”So saying, the prince arose, followed by his companions, and he
bade them farewell, having told their angel guide to take them back
to their apartments and to show them all the considerations of
courtesy. He also told the angel to call urbane and affable men as
well, to entertain them with conversation about the various joys of
that society.
- 16. [The Prince Speaks]
-
- 17. [A Day in the Life of Heaven]
17. When they got back to their apartments, it happened as
arranged, and men summoned from the city arrived to entertain them
with conversation about the various joys of the society. After an
exchange of greetings, they went walking, and the men made polite
conversation with them. But their angel guide said that the ten
visitors had been invited into that heaven to see its joys and so
gain a new idea of eternal happiness.“Tell them, therefore, something about its joys,” he
said, “the joys that affect the physical senses. Later some
men of wisdom will come to explain some of the things that make
those joys pleasing and delightful.”Heeding the angel, the men summoned from the city told them the
following:(1) “We have days of celebration here, proclaimed by the
prince, to relax people’s spirits from the fatigue that the drive
to excel may have produced in some of them. These days are
accompanied by instrumental and choral musical performances in the
public squares, and by athletic and theatrical performances outside
the city.“Bandstands are erected in the public squares on such
occasions, surrounded by latticework woven out of vines, with
clusters of grapes hanging from them. The musicians sit inside in
three tiers, with stringed and wind instruments, both high-voiced
and low, shrill-voiced and mellow. On either side of them are
singers, male and female, and they entertain the citizens with
delightful exultation and singing, in concert and solo, varying the
type of music periodically. On these days of celebration, such
performances last from morning to noon, and after noon till
evening.”[2] (2) “In addition, every morning we hear the most
charming singing of young women and girls coming from the houses
around the public squares, filling the whole city with its sound.
Each morning they express some particular affection of spiritual
love in song, which is to say that they express it in sound by the
variations or modulations of the singing voice, and the affection
is perceived in the singing as though the singing were the
affection itself. The sound infuses itself into the souls of its
hearers and stirs them to a corresponding state. Such is the nature
of heavenly song.“The singers say that the sound of their singing seems to
be inspired and to take life on its own from within, and by itself
to rise delightfully in quality, according to the reception of it
by its hearers.“When the singing comes to an end, the windows are closed
in the houses on the square and at the same time in the houses
along the streets, and the doors are shut, too, and then the whole
city falls silent. Not a sound is heard anywhere, nor is anyone
seen wandering about. All are then ready to carry on the duties of
their appointed tasks.”[3] (3) “Around noon, however, the doors are opened, and
here and there in the afternoon the windows, too, and boys and
girls are seen playing games in the streets, under the supervision
of their nursemaids and teachers sitting on the porches of the
houses.”[4] (4) “On the edges of the city, in its outskirts,
various activities go on for boys and adolescent youths. There are
running games, ball games, and games with rebounding balls, called
rackets. Competitive exercises are held among the boys to show who
is quicker and who is slower in speaking, acting and comprehending.
And the quicker ones receive several laurel leaves as a prize.
There are also many other activities which serve to encourage the
latent abilities in boys.”[5] (5) “Moreover, outside the city theatrical performances
are put on by comic actors on stages, who portray the various
honorable qualities and virtues of moral life, with dramatic actors
among them also to provide points of comparison.”At that, one of the ten visitors asked, “What do you mean,
“to provide points of comparison”?”And the men answered, “No virtue with its honorable and
becoming qualities can be presented convincingly except through
relative comparisons of those qualities, from the greatest of them
to the least of them. The dramatic actors portray the least of
those qualities even to the point that they become non-existent.
But it has been prescribed by law that they may not exhibit
anything of the opposite that is called dishonorable and
unbecoming, except symbolically and, so to speak, from a distance.“The reason it has been so prescribed by law is that no
honorable or good quality of any virtue ever passes through
diminishing stages to the point of becoming dishonorable and bad,
but only to the point of becoming so very little that it dies, and
when it dies, then the opposite begins. That is why heaven, where
all things are honorable and good, has nothing in common with hell,
where all things are dishonorable and bad.”
- 17. [A Day in the Life of Heaven]
-
- 18. [Eight Wise Men]
18. While they were speaking, a servant ran up and announced
that eight men of wisdom were there by order of the prince and were
waiting to enter. Hearing this, the angel went out and welcomed
them and brought them in. Then after a brief exchange of the
customary courtesies of greeting, the men of wisdom first spoke
with them about the initial and developmental stages of wisdom,
including various remarks on the way it progresses, saying that
wisdom in the case of angels never comes to an end and stops, but
grows and increases to eternity.Listening to the discussion, the angel with the company said to
the men, “At luncheon our prince talked to them about the
abode of wisdom, saying that it lies in useful service. Speak to
them, if you please, about this as well.”So they said, “When human beings were first created, they
were imbued with wisdom and a love of wisdom, not for their own
sake, but for the sake of their having it to share with others.
Therefore it was engraved on the wisdom of the wise that no one
should be wise and live for himself alone, unless he was wise and
lived at the same time for others. This was the origin of society,
which otherwise would not exist. To live for others is to perform
useful services. Useful services are the bonds of society, there
being as many bonds as there are good and useful services, and
useful services are unlimited in number.“Useful services are spiritual when they have to do with
love toward God and love for the neighbor. They are moral and civic
services when they have to do with love for the society or civil
state in which a person resides, and with love of the companions
and fellow citizens with whom he is associated. Useful services are
natural when they have to do with love of the world and its
necessities. And they are corporeal when they have to do with the
love of self-preservation for the sake of higher uses.[2] “All these capacities for being useful are engraved on
the human spirit, and they follow in sequence, one after another,
and when they are combined, one exists within another.“People who concern themselves with the first useful
services, which are spiritual, also concern themselves with the
ones that follow, and these people are wise. People who do not
concern themselves with the first useful services, however, and yet
concern themselves with the second kind and those that follow
after, are not so wise, but only appear as if they were on account
of their outward morality and civic-mindedness.“People who are not concerned with the first and second
types of useful service, but with the third and fourth kinds, are
hardly wise at all, for they are followers of Satan, in that they
love only the world, and themselves for worldly ends; while people
who concern themselves only with useful services of the fourth kind
are the least wise of all, being devils, because they live for
themselves alone, and if they do anything for others, it is merely
for the sake of themselves.[3] “Furthermore, every love has its own delight, for love
lives through delight, and the delight of the love of performing
useful services is heavenly delight, which descends into the
succeeding delights in turn and in the order of its descent
ennobles them and makes them eternal.”Afterwards the men recounted some of the heavenly delights
resulting from the love of being useful, saying that there are
millions of them and that people enter into those delights who
enter into heaven. And speaking further about the love of being
useful, they drew out the day with them with wise discussions until
evening.
- 18. [Eight Wise Men]
-
- 19. [Wedding Garments]
19. Around evening, however, a runner dressed in linen came
looking for the ten visitors accompanying the angel and invited
them to a wedding to be celebrated the following day. And the
visitors greatly rejoiced that they would also see a wedding in
heaven.After this they were taken to one of the privy councillors and
they dined with him. Then after dinner they came back, and taking
their departure from each other, they separated, each to his own
bedroom, where they slept till morning.On waking in the morning, they then heard the singing of young
women and girls coming from the houses around the public square, as
previously described.[*2] The affection expressed in the singing
that morning was one of married love. Being deeply affected and
moved by the sweetness of it, they began to perceive a pleasant
sense of bliss being implanted in their feelings of joy, which
elevated those feelings and gave them a new quality.When it was time, the angel said, “Get yourselves ready and
put on the garments of heaven which our prince sent to you before.”So they dressed, and suddenly their garments began to shine as
if with a flaming light. And they asked the angel, “Why is
this happening?”The angel replied, “It is because you are going to a
wedding. It happens with us that on such occasions our garments
shine and they become wedding garments.”[*1] See above, no. 17:2.
- 19. [Wedding Garments]
-
- 20. [A Wedding in Heaven]
20. Afterwards the angel took them to the house where the
wedding was to take place, and a doorman opened the doors for them.
Then shortly, inside the doorway, they were welcomed and greeted by
an angel sent by the bridegroom, and they were taken in and
escorted to seats reserved for them. Presently, then, they were
invited into an anteroom outside the marriage chamber, where they
saw a table in the center. On the table stood a magnificent
candelabrum with seven branches and cups of gold. Over on the walls
hung lampholders of silver, which, once lit, caused the
surroundings to appear as though golden. And to the sides of the
candelabrum they saw two tables holding cakes placed in three rows,
and in the four corners of the room, tables set with crystal
goblets.[2] While they were looking at these things, suddenly a door
opened from a room next to the bridal chamber, and they saw six
young women coming out, and behind them the bridegroom and bride,
holding each other by the hand and escorting each other to a seat
of honor. The seat was placed facing the candelabrum, and they took
their places on it, the bridegroom on the left side of the bride,
and the bride on his right. And the six young women stood to the
side of the seat, next to the bride.The bridegroom was dressed in a glistening purple robe and a
tunic of shining linen, with an ephod bearing a gold plaque studded
around the edges with diamonds. Engraved on the plaque was a young
eaglet, the wedding emblem of that society of heaven. And on his
head the bridegroom wore a turban.The bride, moreover, was dressed in a scarlet mantle, and under
it an embroidered gown, extending from her neck to her feet, and
about the waist she wore a golden cummerbund, and on her head a
crown of gold studded with rubies.[3] When they were thus seated together, the bridegroom turned
to the bride and placed a gold ring on her finger, and taking out
bracelets and a necklace of pearls, he fastened the bracelets on
her wrists and the necklace around her neck. Then he said, “Accept
these tokens.” And when she accepted them, he kissed her and
said, “Now you are mine,” and he called her his wife.This done, the guests cried out, “May there be a blessing!”
They each called this out individually, and then all together. One
sent by the prince in the prince’s stead also called out. And at
that moment the room was filled with an aromatic smoke, which was
the sign of a blessing from heaven.Then servants in attendance took cakes from the two tables next
to the candelabrum, and goblets, now filled with wine, from the
tables in the four corners of the room, and they gave each guest a
piece of cake and a goblet, and they ate and they drank.Later the husband and his wife arose, followed to the doorway by
the six young women carrying silver lamps, which were now lit. And
the married couple entered the marriage chamber, and the door was
closed.
- 20. [A Wedding in Heaven]
-
- 21. [What the Wedding Means]
21. Afterwards the angel guide spoke with the guests regarding
his ten companions, saying that he had brought them in by command
and had shown them the magnificence of the prince’s palace with the
wonders it contained, and that they had dined at luncheon with the
prince. He said, too, that they had subsequently spoken with some
of the wise men of the society, and he asked the guests if they
would permit the visitors to engage in some conversation with them
as well.So they came and spoke with them. And one of the wise among the
men at the wedding said, “Do you understand the meanings of
the things you have seen?”They said, a little. And then they asked him why the bridegroom
– now the husband – was dressed as he was.The wise man replied that the bridegroom – now the husband –
represented the Lord, and the bride – now the wife – represented
the church, because weddings in heaven represent a marriage of the
Lord with the church.“That is why the groom had a turban on his head,” the
wise man said, “and why he was dressed in a robe, tunic and
ephod like Aaron. And that is why the bride – now the wife – wore a
crown on her head and was dressed in a mantle like a queen.
Tomorrow, however, they will be dressed differently, because this
representation lasts only this one day.”[2] Again the visitors asked, “If the groom represented the
Lord and the bride the church, why did she sit on his right side?”The wise man answered, “It is because a marriage of the
Lord and the church is formed by two things, namely, love and
wisdom, the Lord being the love and the church being the wisdom,
and wisdom sits on the right hand of love. For a person of the
church becomes wise as though on his own, and as he becomes wise,
he receives love from the Lord. The right hand also symbolizes
power, and love has power through wisdom.“But as I said, after the wedding the representation
changes, for then the husband represents wisdom and the wife
represents love of that wisdom. This love, however, is not the
first love referred to before, but a secondary love which the wife
has from the Lord through the wisdom of her husband. The Lord’s
love, which is the first love, is the love in the husband of
becoming wise. Consequently, after the wedding the two together,
the husband and his wife, represent the church.”[3] The visitors further asked, “Why did you men not stand
beside the bridegroom – now the husband – as the six bridesmaids
stood beside the bride – now the wife?”The wise man answered, “The reason is that on this day we
are counted among the maidens, and the number six symbolizes all
people and completeness.”But they said, “What do you mean?”
He replied, “Maidens symbolize the church, and the church
is made up of both sexes. Therefore we, too, are maidens in terms
of the church. That this is so appears from these words in the book
of Revelation:These are the ones who were not defiled with women, for they are
virgins and follow the Lamb wherever He goes. (Revelation 14:4)“Moreover, because maidens symbolize the church, therefore
the Lord likened the church to ten virgins invited to a wedding
(Matthew 25:1ff.). And because the church is symbolized by Israel,
Zion and Jerusalem, therefore the Word so often refers to the
“virgin” and “daughter” of Israel, of Zion and
of Jerusalem. The Lord also describes His marriage with the church
by these words in the Psalms of David:At your right hand, the queen in the fine gold of Ophir…, her
clothing of inweavings of gold, she shall be brought to the King in
garments of needlework, the virgins after her, her companions…,
they shall come into the palace of the King. (Psalms 45:9-15)”[4] Afterwards the visitors asked, “Is it not proper for a
priest to be present and officiate in these ceremonies?”The wise man answered, “It is proper on earth, but not in
heaven because of the couple’s representing the Lord and the
church. People on earth do not know this. But among us a priest
still performs betrothals and hears, receives, confirms and
consecrates the consent. The consent is the essential element in
marriage, and the rest of the things that follow are its
formalities.”
- 21. [What the Wedding Means]
-
- 22. [The Modest Bridesmaids]
22. After this the angel guide went over to the six bridesmaids
and told them as well about his companions, and he asked them to
grace the visitors with their company. So they started to approach,
but when they drew near, they suddenly turned back and went into
the women’s quarters where their friends, young women like them,
were.Seeing this, the angel guide followed them and asked them why
they had turned away so suddenly without speaking to the visitors.
They replied, “We could not go near.” And the angel said,
“Why not?” And they answered, “We do not know, but
we felt something that repelled us and drew us back. We hope they
forgive us.”So the angel returned to his companions and told them the young
women’s response, and he added, “I divine that you do not have
a chaste love for the opposite sex. In heaven we love young women
for their beauty and elegance of manners, and we love them very
much, but chastely.”At this his companions laughed and said, “You divine
correctly. Who can see such beauties near and not feel some
desire?”
- 22. [The Modest Bridesmaids]
-
- 23. [Going to Church]
23. At the end of this festive reception, the wedding guests all
departed, including the ten men with their angel. It was late
evening and they went to bed.At dawn they heard a cry proclaiming, “Today is the
Sabbath.” So they arose and asked the angel, “What does
this mean?”The angel replied that it was a call to worship of God, which
recurs at prescribed times and is proclaimed by the priests. “The
worship takes place in our temples,” he said, “and lasts
about two hours. Come with me, therefore, if you like, and I will
take you in.”So they readied themselves, and accompanying the angel, they
went in. And lo, the temple was huge, capable of holding about
three thousand people. It was semicircular, with benches or pews
arranged around in circular fashion following the contour of the
temple, and the seats in back were higher than those in front. The
pulpit was in front of the seats, placed a little way back from the
center. There was a door behind the pulpit on the left.The ten newcomers entered with their angel guide, and the angel
gave them places to sit, saying to them, “Everyone who comes
into the temple knows his own place. He knows this by instinct, nor
can he sit anywhere else. If he sits elsewhere, he hears nothing
and understands nothing, and he also disturbs the order of things;
and when the order is disturbed, the priest is not inspired.”
- 23. [Going to Church]
-
- 24. [A Heavenly Sermon]
24. When the congregation was assembled, a priest went up into
the pulpit, and he preached a sermon full of the spirit of wisdom.
He preached on the sacredness of the Holy Scripture and on the
conjunction of the Lord with each world, the spiritual and the
natural, by means of it. In the enlightenment in which he was, he
established fully that that Holy Book was dictated by Jehovah the
Lord, and that the Lord is therefore present in it, even so that He
is the wisdom in it. But that wisdom, he said, which is the Lord in
it, lies hidden beneath the literal meaning and is not disclosed
except to people who are concerned with truths of doctrine and at
the same time with goodness in life, thus who are in the Lord and
the Lord in them.He concluded the sermon with a reverent prayer and descended.
As the members of the congregation were leaving, the angel asked
the priest to say a few words of farewell to his ten companions. So
he came over to them, and they talked for half an hour. The priest
spoke about the Divine Trinity, saying that it exists in Jesus
Christ, in whom dwells all the fullness of the Godhead bodily,
according to the statement of the apostle Paul.[*1] Then he spoke
of the union of charity and faith, though he said the union of
charity and truth, because faith is truth.[*1] Colossians 2:9.
- 24. [A Heavenly Sermon]
-
- 25. [Departure]
25. After expressing their thanks, the visitors went home, and
there the angel said to them, “Today is the third day since
your ascent into the society of this heaven, and you were prepared
by the Lord to stay here for three days. Consequently it is time
for us to part. Take off the garments sent by the prince,
therefore, and put on your own.”Then, when they were in their own clothing, they were filled
with a desire to leave, and they left and descended, with the angel
accompanying them till they reached the place of assembly. And
there they gave thanks to the Lord, that He had deigned to bless
them with knowledge and so with understanding regarding heavenly
joys and eternal happiness.
- 25. [Departure]
- 26. [Heaven Opened]
26. Again I swear in truth that these events and words occurred
as I have related them, the first ones in the world of spirits,
which is midway between heaven and hell, and the subsequent ones in
a society of heaven, the society from which came the angel with the
trumpet, who acted as guide.Who in the Christian world would know anything about heaven and
the joys and happiness there – knowledge of which is also knowledge
of salvation – unless it pleased the Lord to open to someone the
sight of his spirit and to show him and teach him?Corroboration that things like these occur in the spiritual
world appears plainly from the things seen and heard by the apostle
John, as described in the book of Revelation. For example, he
describes having seen the following:The Son of Man in the midst of the seven lampstands.[*1]
A tabernacle, temple, ark, and altar in heaven.[*2]
A book sealed with seven seals. The book opened, and horses
going out of it.[*3]Four living creatures around a throne.[*4]
Twelve thousand taken from each tribe.[*5]
Locusts arising out of the abyss.[*6]
A dragon and its fight with Michael.[*7]
A woman giving birth to a male child and fleeing into the
wilderness because of the dragon.[*8]Two beasts, one rising up out of the sea, the other out of the
earth.[*9]A woman sitting on a scarlet beast.[*10]
The dragon cast into a lake of fire and brimstone.[*11]
A white horse, and a great supper.[*12]
A new heaven and a new earth, and the holy Jerusalem coming
down, described as to its gates, wall, and foundations.[*13]Also a river of water of life, and trees of life yielding fruits
every month.[*14]Besides many other things, all of which were seen by John, and
seen when he was in the spirit[*15] in the spiritual world and in
heaven. In addition, those things which were seen by the apostles
after the Lord’s resurrection.[*16] And which were later seen by
Peter (Acts of the Apostles, chapter 11).[*17] Also which were then
seen and heard by Paul.[*18]Moreover, there were the things seen by the prophets. For
example, Ezekiel saw the following:Four living creatures, which were cherubs. (Ezekiel 1 and 10)
A new temple and a new earth, and an angel measuring them.
(Ezekiel 40-48)Being carried off to Jerusalem, he saw the abominations there.
(Ezekiel 8) And he was also carried off into Chaldea, to those in
captivity. (Ezekiel 11)[*19]Something similar happened with Zechariah:
He saw a man riding among myrtle trees. (Zechariah 1:8ff.)
He saw four horns, and then a man with a measuring line in his
hand. (Zechariah 1:18ff., 2:1ff.)He saw a lampstand and two olive trees. (Zechariah 4:1ff.)
He saw a flying scroll, and an ephah. (Zechariah 5:1,6)
He saw four chariots coming from between two mountains, with
horses. (Zechariah 6:1ff.)Likewise with Daniel:
He saw four beasts come up from the sea. (Daniel 7:1ff.)
Also the combats of a ram and a goat. (Daniel 8:1ff.)
He saw the angel Gabriel, who spoke at length with him. (Daniel
9)[*20]Moreover, Elisha’s young man saw fiery chariots and horses
around Elisha, and he saw them when his eyes were opened.[*21]From these and many other passages in the Word, it is evident
that the things which exist in the spiritual world have appeared to
many, before and after the Lord’s Advent. Why should it be
surprising for them to appear also now, when the Church is
beginning and the New Jerusalem is coming down from the Lord out of
heaven?[*1] Revelation 1:12,13.
[*2] E.g., Revelation 6:9, 8:3, 9:13, 11:19, 14:17,18, 15:5,6,8.
[*3] Revelation 5:1, 6:1-8.
[*4] Revelation 4:6, et al.
[*5] Revelation 7:4-8.
[*6] Revelation 9:2,3.
[*7] Revelation 12:3,4,7.
[*8] Revelation 12:1-6.
[*9] Revelation 13:1ff.,11ff.
[*10] Revelation 17:3ff.
[*11] Revelation 20:10.
[*12] Revelation 19:11,17,18.
[*13] Revelation 21:1,2,12-21.
[*14] Revelation 22:1,2.
[*15] Revelation 1:10, 4:2, 17:3, 21:10.
[*16] See Matthew 28, Mark 16, Luke 24, John 20, 21, Acts
1:4-11.[*17] Acts 10:9-16, 11:5-10.
[*18] See Acts 9:1-19, 22:6-21, 26:12-18.
[*19] Ezekiel 11:24.
[*20] Daniel 9:20-27.
[*21] 2 Kings 6:17.
-
- 27. MARRIAGES IN HEAVEN
-
- 27. [Disbelief comes from lack of knowledge.]
People cannot accept as a matter of faith that marriages exist
in heaven if they believe that a person is a soul or spirit after
death, and hold to an idea of the soul or spirit as being like thin
air or a puff of breath. Nor can they accept it if they believe
that a person does not live again as a person until after the day
of the Last Judgment.In general, people cannot accept the existence of marriages in
heaven if they know nothing about the spiritual world, the world in
which angels and spirits live, consequently where the heavens and
hells are. Moreover, because that world has till now remained
unknown, and because it has not been known at all that the angels
in heaven are people in perfect form, likewise that the spirits in
hell are people in imperfect form, therefore nothing could be
revealed respecting marriages in that world. Indeed, people would
have said, “How can a soul be united with a soul, or a bit of
breath with a bit of breath, as husbands and wives are united on
earth?”There would have been many other objections, too, which, the
moment they were voiced, would have taken away and dispelled belief
in the existence of marriages in the other world.Now, however, many things have been revealed about that world,
and what that world is like has been described. This I did in the
book, Heaven and Hell, and also in The Apocalypse Revealed. Because
of this, the existence of marriages there can be defended, even to
the sight of reason, by the following arguments:(1) A person lives as a person after death.
(2) A male is then still a male, and a female still a female.
(3) Everyone’s own love remains in him after death.
(4) Especially does a love for the opposite sex remain, and in
the case of people coming into heaven, namely, people who become
spiritual on earth, married love.(5) All of this has been fully attested by personal observation.
(6) Consequently, marriages exist in heaven.
(7) Spiritual marriage is meant by the Lord’s words, that after
the resurrection they are not given in marriage.Development of these arguments now follows, taking them one by
one:
- 27. [Disbelief comes from lack of knowledge.]
- (1) A person lives as a person after death.
-
- 28. [What people think of heaven.]
28. (1) A person lives as a person after death. It has not been
known in the world till now that a person lives as a person after
death, for the reasons just mentioned above. And what is
remarkable, it has not been known even in the Christian world,
where people have the Word and therefore enlightenment regarding
eternal life on account of the Word, in which the Lord Himself
teaches that the dead all rise again, and that God is not God of
the dead, but of the living (Matthew 22:31,32, Luke 20:37,38).Moreover, in respect to the affections and thoughts of his mind
a person is in the midst of angels and spirits and is so
associated with them that he could not be severed from them
without dying. It is still more remarkable that this, too, is not
known, even though every person who has died from the beginning of
creation, after death has gone and continues to go to his own, or,
as the Word says, has been gathered and is gathered to his
people.[*1]In addition, people also have a general perception (which is
the same thing as saying an influx of heaven into the inner
faculties of their minds), which causes them to perceive truths
inwardly in themselves and, in a way, to see them, and especially
this truth, that one lives as a person after death, happily if he
has lived well, and unhappily if he has lived ill. For who does
not have this thought when he elevates his mind a little from the
body and from the thinking nearest his senses, as happens when he
is inwardly in a state of Divine worship, or when he lies dying in
his bed and is awaiting the end. Likewise when he is told about
the deceased and their lot.I have reported thousands of things about the dead, as for
example, what the lot of certain people’s brothers, married
partners, and friends was like. I have written as well about the
lot of Englishmen, Dutchmen, Roman Catholics, Jews, and gentiles,
and also about the lot of Luther, Calvin and Melanchthon. And I
have never yet heard anyone say, “How can that be their lot
when they have not yet risen from their graves, seeing that the
Last Judgment has not yet taken place! Are they not in the
meantime souls that are bits of breath, existing in some limbo or
other?”I have heard no one say anything like that yet. And from this I
have been able to conclude that everyone has an inner perception
that one lives as a person after death.What man who has loved his married partner and his infants and
children, does not say to himself when they are dying or dead, if
he is in a state of thought raised above the sensory things of the
body, that they are in the hand of God, and that following his own
death he will see them again and join with them once more in a
life of love and joy?[*1] See Genesis 25:8,17, 35:29, 49:29,33; Numbers 20:24,26,
27:13, 31:2; Deuteronomy 32:50; also Genesis 15:15; Judges 2:10; 2
Kings 22:20; 2 Chronicles 34:28; Acts 13:36.
- 28. [What people think of heaven.]
-
- 29. [Afterlife is not ethereal.]
29. Who cannot see in accord with reason, if he is willing to
see, that a person after death is not a bit of breath, of which he
has no other idea than that it is like a puff of wind, or like air
or ether, which is or in which is the person’s soul, longing and
waiting for union with its body so that it may enjoy sensations
and the pleasures of the senses as it did before in the world? Who
cannot see that if this were the case with a person after death,
his condition would be worse than the condition of fishes, birds
and animals of the earth, whose souls do not live on and so do not
exist in a state of such anxious suspense from longing and
waiting?If a person after death were such a bit of breath and thus a
puff of wind, either he would then be flitting around the
universe, or, according to the traditions of some, he would be
kept in some sort of nether world, or as the church fathers call
it, in limbo, until the Last Judgment.Who using his reason cannot conclude accordingly that people
who have lived from the beginning of creation – a period reckoned
at six thousand years – would still be in the same state of
suspense, and in a progressively more anxious state of suspense,
since all waiting with desire produces anxious suspense and with
the passage of time increases it. And would not one conclude
accordingly that they either must still be flitting around the
universe or are being kept shut up in limbo, and so are in extreme
misery? This would include Adam and his wife, likewise Abraham,
Isaac and Jacob, and likewise all the rest from that time.According to this line of thinking, nothing would be more
lamentable than to be born a human being.But the opposite has been provided by the Lord, who is Jehovah
from eternity and the Creator of the universe. He has provided
that the condition of a person who conjoins himself with Him by
living according to His commandments be more blessed and happy
after death than his condition before it in the world, and that it
be more blessed and happy for the reason that the person is then
spiritual, and a spiritual person feels and experiences spiritual
delight, which is superior to natural delight, because it exceeds
it a thousand times.
- 29. [Afterlife is not ethereal.]
-
- 30. [People in the Bible saw angels as human.]
30. Angels and spirits are people, and this can be seen from
the ones who appeared to Abraham, Gideon, Daniel and the prophets,
especially to John when he wrote the book of Revelation, and also
to the women at the Lord’s tomb. Indeed, the Lord Himself appeared
to the disciples after His resurrection. These appearances
occurred because the eyes of the spirit of the people who saw them
were opened, and when the eyes of the spirit are opened, angels
appear in their true form, which is human. But when the eyes of
the spirit are closed, that is, when they are covered over by the
sight of eyes which draw all their sensations from the material
world, then angels and spirits do not appear.
- 30. [People in the Bible saw angels as human.]
- 31. [The difference between spiritual and
natural.]31. It must be known, however, that after death a person is not
a natural person, but a spiritual person, and yet he appears just
the same to himself, and so much the same that he is not aware of
being anywhere else than still in the natural world. For he is the
same in body, in facial appearance, in speech and in the
sensations he feels, because he is the same in affection and
thought, having the same will and intellect.He is, in fact, not actually the same, because he is spiritual
and therefore an interior man. But the difference is not apparent
to him, because he cannot compare his present state with his
earlier, natural state, having put off the natural state and being
in a spiritual state.I have quite often heard such persons say, therefore, that they
are not aware of being anywhere else than in the previous world,
with the sole difference that they no longer see people whom they
left behind in that earlier world, while they do see those who had
departed or passed on from that world.Nevertheless, the reason they now see people who had passed on
and not those whom they left behind is because they are not
natural people but spiritual or essential people, and a spiritual
or essential person sees another spiritual or essential person in
the same way as a natural or material person sees another natural
or material person.Natural people and spiritual people do not see each other,
however, on account of the difference between the essential and
the material, which is like the difference between something prior
and something subsequent. And because the prior is in itself
purer, it cannot be seen by the subsequent, which, in itself, is
cruder; nor can the subsequent, owing to its being cruder, be seen
by the prior, which in itself is purer. Consequently, an angel
cannot be seen by a person of this world, neither can a person of
this world be seen by an angel.A person after death is a spiritual or essential person because
the spiritual or essential person lay hidden within the natural or
material person. The latter served him as clothing, or like a
shell to be put off, and when it is laid aside, the spiritual or
essential person emerges, being thus purer, more interior and more
perfect.A spiritual person is still a complete person, even though not
visible to a natural person, and this was clearly shown by the
Lord’s appearances to the apostles after His resurrection, in that
He appeared and then disappeared, and yet remained the same person
He was whether He was seen or unseen. They also said that when
they saw Him, their eyes were opened.[*1][*1] See Luke 24:31.
-
- (2) A male is then still a male, and a female
still a female.-
- 32. [Essential masculinity and femininity.]
32. (2) A male is then still a male, and a female still a
female. Since a person lives as a person after death, and people
are male and female, and since it is one thing to be masculine and
another to be feminine, with the two qualities being so different
that one cannot be converted into the other, it follows that after
death a male still lives as a male and a female still lives as a
female, each of them being a spiritual person.We say that masculinity cannot be converted into femininity,
nor femininity into masculinity, and that after death a male is
consequently still a male, and a female still a female. But
because people do not know what masculinity consists in
essentially, and what femininity consists in essentially,
therefore we must say a few words about it here.The difference essentially consists in this, that the inmost
quality in masculinity is love, and its veil wisdom, or in other
words, it is love veiled over with wisdom, while the inmost
quality in femininity is that same wisdom, the wisdom of
masculinity, and its veil the love resulting from it. This second
love, however, is a feminine love, and it is given by the Lord to
a wife through the wisdom of her husband, whereas that first love
is a masculine love, which is a love of becoming wise, and it is
given by the Lord to a husband according to his reception of
wisdom. Consequently, the male is a form of the wisdom of love,
and the female is a form of the love of that wisdom. Therefore
from creation there was implanted in both male and female a love
of uniting into one. But more on this subject will be said later.Testimony that femininity is derived from masculinity, or that
woman was taken out of man, appears from these verses in Genesis:Jehovah God…took one of the ribs of the man, and closed up
the flesh in its place. And the rib which He had taken from man He
fashioned into a woman, and He brought her to the man. And the man
said: “She is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh.
Therefore she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of
Man.” (Genesis 2:21-23)Elsewhere it will be said what a rib symbolizes, and what flesh
symbolizes.[*1][*1] See no. 193.
- 32. [Essential masculinity and femininity.]
- 33. [Different and complementary]
33. It is owing to this original formation that a male is born
intellect-oriented and that a female is born will-oriented, or in
other words, that a male is born with an affection for knowing,
understanding and becoming wise, while a female is born with a
love for joining herself to that affection in the male.Furthermore, because interior qualities form the exterior ones
to their likeness, and the masculine form is a form of the
intellect while the feminine form is a form of the love of the
intellect, therefore the male has a different look, a different
sound, and a different physique from the female. Namely, he has a
tougher look, a rougher sound, and a stronger physique, and
moreover his lower face is bearded. In general, he has a less
beautiful form than the female. The two sexes also differ in
behavior and manners. In short, nothing in the two sexes is the
same, although there is nevertheless a capacity for conjunction in
every detail.Indeed, masculinity in the male is masculine in every part,
even in the least part of his body, and also in every idea of his
thought, and in every bit of his affection. So, too, with
femininity in the female. And because one cannot as a consequence
be converted into the other, it follows that after death a male is
still male, and that a female is still female.
-
- (3) Everyone’s own love remains in him after
death.-
- 34. [What love is]
34. (3) Everyone’s own love remains in him after death. People
know that love exists, but they do not know what love is. They
know that it exists from common conversation. For instance, people
say that “he loves me,” that a king loves his subjects
and the subjects love their king, that a husband loves his wife,
and a mother her children, and vice versa, also that this person
or that loves his country, his fellow citizens, his neighbor. So,
too, with matters abstracted from person, as in saying that one
loves this or that thing.But even though love is so frequently mentioned, nevertheless
scarcely anyone knows what love is. Whenever someone meditates on
it, he cannot then form for himself any idea in his thought about
it, thus he cannot bring it into the light of his understanding,
because it is not a matter of light but of warmth. Therefore he
says either that love is not anything, or that it is merely some
stimulus flowing in through his vision, hearing and social
interaction, which thus affects him. He does not know that love is
his very life, not only the general life in his whole body and the
general life in all his thoughts, but also the life in every
single particle of them.The wise person can perceive this from considering the
following proposition: If you take away the impulse of love, can
you form any thought? Or can you perform any action? In the
measure that the affection belonging to love cools, is it not true
that in the same measure thought, speech and action cool? And the
warmer the affection grows, the warmer they grow?Love, therefore, is the warmth in a person’s life or his vital
heat. The warmth of the blood, and also its redness, have no other
origin. The fire of the angelic sun, which is pure love, causes
it.
- 34. [What love is]
-
- 35. [Love is the real person]
35. Everyone has his own love, or a love different from anyone
else’s love. That is, no one person has the same love as another.
This can be seen from the endless variety in facial features.
Faces are the representative images of loves. Everyone knows that
facial expressions change and vary according to the affections of
love. Desires also, which have to do with love, as well as
feelings of joy and pain, shine forth from the face.From this it is evident that a person is what he loves, or
rather, that he is the form of his love. But it should be known
that it is the inner person – which is the same as his spirit that
lives after death – that is the form of his love. Not so the outer
person in the world, because the outer person has learned from
early childhood to hide the desires of his love, indeed, to
pretend and feign other desires than his true ones.
- 35. [Love is the real person]
- 36. [Love is what remains]
36. Everyone’s own love remains in him after death for the
reason that love is a person’s life (as just said above, no. 34),
and consequently it is the real person. A person is also what he
thinks, thus what his intelligence and wisdom are, but these are
united with his love. For a person thinks because of his love and
according to it; in fact, if he is free to do so, he speaks and
acts from it. From this it can be seen that love is the being or
essence of a person’s life, and that thought is the resulting
expression or manifestation of his life. Speech and action that
spring from thought, therefore, do not spring from thought, but
from love acting through thought.I have been granted to know from a good deal of experience that
a person after death is not what he thinks but what his affection
is and what he thinks from that, which is to say that he is what
his love is and subsequently his intelligence. I have also been
granted to know that after death a person puts away everything
that is not in harmony with his love; indeed, that he
progressively takes on the look, sound, speech, behavior and
manners of his life’s love. It is for this reason that the whole
of heaven has been set in order according to all the varieties in
the affections connected with the love of good, and that the whole
of hell has been arranged according to all the affections
connected with the love of evil.
-
- (4) Especially does a love for the opposite
sex remain, and in the case of people coming into heaven, namely,
people who become spiritual on earth, married love.-
- 37. [Sexuality is intrinsic]
37. (4) Especially does a love for the opposite sex remain, and
in the case of people coming into heaven, namely, people who
become spiritual on earth, married love. A love for the opposite
sex remains in a person after death for the reason that a male is
then still a male, and a female still a female, and masculinity in
the male is masculine in the whole and every part of him, likewise
femininity in the female, and there is a capacity for conjunction
in every detail – indeed, in every least detail – of the two
sexes.Now, because that capacity for conjunction was introduced from
creation and is therefore permanently present in the two sexes, it
follows that each yearns for and aspires to conjunction with the
other.Love regarded in itself is nothing but a desire for and
consequent effort to conjunction, and married love is a desire for
and effort to conjunction into one. For the human male and the
human female were so created that from being two they might become
as though one person or one flesh.[*1] And when they become one,
then taken together they are man in his fullest sense.[*2] But
without that conjunction they are two, and each is like a person
divided or half a person.Now, because that innate capacity for conjunction lies inmostly
within every single aspect of the male and in every single aspect
of the female, and an ability and desire for conjunction into one
is present in every part, it follows that a mutual and reciprocal
love for the opposite sex remains in people after death.[*1] Genesis 2:24, Matthew 19:4-6, Mark 10:6-9.
[*2] Cf. Genesis 1:27.
- 37. [Sexuality is intrinsic]
- 38. [Married love is more than sexual love]
38. We use the terms, love for the opposite sex and married
love, because a love for the opposite sex is not the same as
married love. A love for the opposite sex is found in a natural
person, but married love in a spiritual person.A natural person loves and wants only external conjunctions,
with the physical pleasures arising from them, while a spiritual
person loves and wants an internal conjunction, with the states of
spiritual happiness resulting from it. The spiritual person also
perceives that these states of happiness are possible with only
one wife, with whom he can be continually joined more and more
into one. And the more he is so joined with her, in the same
degree he feels his states of happiness ascending and remaining
constant to eternity. The natural person, on the other hand, does
not think in this way.That, now, is why we say that married love remains after death
in the case of people coming into heaven, who are those who become
spiritual on earth.
-
- (5) All of this has been fully attested by
personal observation.- 39. Personal observation
39. (5) All of this has been fully attested by personal
observation. That a person lives as a person after death, that a
male is then still a male, and a female a female, and that
everyone’s own love remains in him, especially love for the
opposite sex and married love – these points I have so far
endeavored to establish by the sort of arguments that appeal to
the intellect and are called rational.But from early childhood people have acquired the belief from
parents and teachers, and afterward from the learned and the
clergy, that a person will not live as a person after death until
after the day of the Last Judgment, which they have been waiting
for, now, for six thousand years.Because of this, and because many people have placed this
question among matters to be accepted on faith and not with the
understanding, it has become necessary that these same points be
attested also by the affidavits of an eyewitness. Otherwise people
who trust only in their senses will say, in accord with the faith
instilled in them, “If people lived as people after death, I
would see them and hear them. Besides, who has come down from
heaven or ascended from hell and told us?”It has not been possible, however, neither is it possible, for
any angel of heaven to descend or any spirit of hell to ascend so
as to speak with any person, except with those who have had the
inner faculties of their mind, the faculties of their spirit,
opened by the Lord. And this cannot take place fully except in the
case of those who have been prepared by the Lord to receive such
things as have to do with spiritual wisdom.It has therefore pleased the Lord to do this with me, in order
to keep the states of heaven and hell and the state of people’s
life after death from remaining unknown, and from being laid to
sleep in ignorance, and from being finally buried in denial.But my personal observations and testimony regarding the points
outlined above are too extensive to be presented here. I have
presented them, however, in the book, Heaven and Hell, and then in
Continuation Concerning the Spiritual World,[*1] and later in The
Apocalypse Revealed. Meanwhile, respecting marriages specifically,
see what is presented here in the narrative accounts that come at
the end of the sections or chapters of this book.[*1] = Continuation Concerning the Last Judgment and the
Spiritual World.
- 39. Personal observation
- (6) Consequently, marriages exist in heaven.
- (7) Spiritual marriage is meant by the Lord’s
words, that after the resurrection they are not given in marriage.- 41. [Spiritual marriage]
41. (7) Spiritual marriage is meant by the Lord’s words, that
after the resurrection they are not given in marriage. In the
Gospels we read the following:Some of the Sadducees, who deny that there is a
resurrection…, asked Jesus, saying, “Teacher, Moses
wrote…that if anyone’s brother dies, having a wife, and he dies
without children, his brother should take his wife and raise up
offspring for his brother…. There were seven brothers, (and one
after another they took her as wife, but they died childless)….
Lastly…the woman died also. In the resurrection, therefore,
whose wife of them does she become…?”But Jesus, answering, said to them, “The children of this
age marry and are given in marriage. But those who shall be held
worthy to attain the second age, and the resurrection from the
dead, shall neither marry nor be given in marriage; nor can they
die any more, for they are like the angels, and are children of
God, being children of the resurrection. Moreover, that the dead
rise again, even Moses showed in reference to the bush, when he
calls the Lord “the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac, and the
God of Jacob.” So, then, He is not God of the dead but of the
living, for all live to Him.” (Luke 20:27-38; cf. Matthew
22:23-32, Mark 12:18-27)The Lord taught two things by these words. First, that a person
rises again after death. And secondly, that people are not given
in marriage in heaven.He taught that a person rises again after death by saying that
God is not God of the dead but of the living, and that Abraham,
Isaac and Jacob are still alive. So likewise in the parable about
the rich man in hell and Lazarus in heaven (Luke 16:19-31).[2] Secondly, He taught that people are not given in marriage
in heaven by saying that those who are held worthy to attain the
second age neither marry nor are given in marriage.The only kind of marriage meant here is spiritual marriage, and
this clearly appears from the words that immediately follow, that
they cannot die any more because they are like the angels and are
children of God, being children of the resurrection.By spiritual marriage, conjunction with the Lord is meant, and
this is achieved on earth. And when it has been achieved on earth,
it has also been achieved in heaven. Therefore in heaven the
marriage does not take place again, nor are people given in
marriage. This, too, is meant by the words, “The children of
this age marry and are given in marriage. But those who are held
worthy to attain the second age neither marry nor are given in
marriage.”Such persons are also called by the Lord, “children of the
wedding”[*1] (Matthew 9:15, Mark 2:19), and here, “angels,”
“children of God,” and “children of the
resurrection.”[3] To marry means to be conjoined with the Lord, and to go to
a wedding means to be received into heaven by the Lord. This
appears from the following references:The kingdom of heaven is like a man, a king, who arranged a
wedding for his son, and sent out his servants (with invitations
to a wedding). (Matthew 22:2,3, to verse 14)The kingdom of heaven is like ten virgins, who…went out to
meet the bridegroom (five of whom were prepared to go to the
wedding). (Matthew 25:1ff.)The Lord meant Himself in this passage, which is apparent from
the thirteenth verse there, where it says,Stay awake…, because you know not the day and the hour in
which the Son of Man will come. (Matthew 25:13)Also from the book of Revelation:
The time for the marriage of the Lamb has come, and His wife
has made herself ready…. Blessed are those who are called to the
marriage supper of the Lamb. (Revelation 19:7,9)There is a spiritual meaning in each and every thing the Lord
said, and this we fully showed in The Doctrine of the New
Jerusalem Regarding the Sacred Scripture (published in Amsterdam
in 1763).[*1] Actually, “children of the bridechamber.”
- 41. [Spiritual marriage]
- Married love seen in its embodiment in a
married couple conveyed down from heaven (nos. 42,
43).-
- 42. [A married couple from heaven]
42. To this I will append two narrative accounts from the
spiritual world. Here is the first:One morning I looked up into the sky, and I saw above me
expanse upon expanse. And as I looked, the first or nearest
expanse was opened, and shortly the second, which was above it,
and finally the third, which was the highest of all. By the light
coming from them I perceived that on the first expanse were angels
of the first or lowest heaven, on the second expanse were angels
of the second or middle heaven, and on the third expanse were
angels of the third or highest heaven.I wondered at first what was happening and why. But shortly I
heard a voice from heaven like the sound of a trumpet, saying, “We
have perceived, and now see, that you are meditating on married
love. Moreover, we know that so far no one on earth knows what
true married love is in its origin or in its essence, and yet it
is important for them to know. Therefore it has pleased the Lord
to open the heavens to you, that the inner faculties of your mind
may receive an influx of illuminating light and thus perception.“Among us in heaven, especially in the third heaven, our
heavenly delights come principally from married love.
Consequently, by permission granted us, we will send a married
couple down to you, in order that you may see.”[2] And suddenly, then, a carriage appeared, coming down from
the highest or third heaven, in which I saw a single angel. But as
it drew near, I saw that it held two.The carriage shone before my eyes in the distance like a
diamond, and harnessed to it were young horses as white as snow.
And the couple sitting in the carriage held in their hands a pair
of turtledoves.And the couple called out to me, “You want us to come
closer. But beware, then, of the flashing light coming from our
heaven, the heaven we descended from. It is a blazing light, and
you must take care that it does not penetrate interiorly. By its
influx, indeed, the higher ideas of your understanding are
enlightened, ideas that, in themselves, are heavenly. But these
same ideas are inexpressible in the world in which you live.
Receive the things you are about to hear, therefore, in rational
terms and so explain them to the understanding.”I replied, “I will take care. Come closer.”
So they came, and behold, it was a husband and his wife. And
they said, “We are married. We have lived a blessed life in
heaven from the earliest time, which you call the golden age,
remaining forever in the same flower of youth that you see us in
today.”[3] I looked at the two of them closely, because I perceived
that they represented married love in their life and in their
adornment – in their life as shown in their faces, and in their
adornment as shown in the garments they wore. For all angels are
affections of love in human form. The essential, dominant
affection shines out from their faces, and they are given clothing
on the basis of their affection and in accordance with it.
Consequently, in heaven they say that everyone is clothed in his
own affection.The husband appeared to be between adolescence and early
manhood in age. From his eyes flashed a light sparkling with the
wisdom of love. His face seemed to be inmostly radiant with this
light, and because of the radiance from within, outwardly his skin
virtually shone. As a result, his whole facial appearance was
singularly one of dazzling good looks.He was dressed in a full-length robe, and under the robe he
wore a blue-colored garment, which was tied about the waist with a
golden girdle bearing three precious stones, two of them
sapphires, one on each side, and a garnet in the middle. His
stockings were of shining linen, into which had been woven threads
of silver; and his shoes were made entirely of silk.This was the representational form that married love took in
the case of the husband.[4] In the case of the wife, however, it took the following
form. I saw her face, and did not see it. I saw it as the very
essence of beauty, and did not see it because the beauty was
beyond expression. For there was in her face the bright glow of a
blazing light, like the light possessed by angels in the third
heaven, and this light dimmed my vision, so that I was simply
stupefied by it.Noticing this, the wife spoke to me, saying, “What do you
see?”I answered, “I see only married love and a picture of it.
But I see and do not see.”At this she turned at an angle away from her husband, and then
I could look more intently. Her eyes flashed with the light of her
heaven, which is blazing, as I said, and so takes its quality from
the love of wisdom. For wives in the third heaven love their
husbands on account of their husbands’ wisdom and in response to
it, and the husbands love their wives on account of and in
response to that love directed towards them, and so they are
united.The wife had her beauty as a result of this, such beauty that
no artist could reproduce it or portray it in its true form, for a
flashing of light like that is not possible in the painter’s
colors, nor is such loveliness expressible in his art.Her hair was attractively arranged in a style to match her
beauty, with jewels in the form of flowers inserted into it. She
had a necklace of garnets, from which hung a rosette of peridots.
And she had bracelets of pearls. She was dressed in a scarlet
gown, and under it a purple bodice fastened in front with rubies.
But what surprised me, the colors kept changing depending on which
way she was facing in relation to her husband, and their sparkle
also kept changing accordingly, being now more, now less – more
when they faced each other, and less when she faced away at an
angle.[5] When I had seen these things, they spoke with me again. And
when the husband spoke, he spoke as though he spoke at the same
time on behalf of his wife, and when the wife spoke, she spoke as
though she spoke at the same time on behalf of her husband. For
such was the union of their minds, from which comes their speech.
It was then that I heard as well the way married love sounds, how
it was inwardly together with, and also the result of, the
delights of a state of peace and innocence.Finally they said, “They are calling us back. We have to
go.”They then appeared to be again riding in a carriage, as before,
and they were borne off along a road stretching out between flower
gardens, from whose beds rose olive trees and trees full of
oranges. And as they drew near their heaven, young women came to
meet them and welcome them and take them in.
- 42. [A married couple from heaven]
- 43. [A message from Heaven]
43. After this, an angel from that heaven appeared to me,
holding in his hand a sheet of paper, which he unrolled, saying,
“I saw that you were meditating on married love. This sheet
of paper contains secrets of wisdom hitherto undiscovered in the
world. They are disclosed now, because it is important. In our
heaven there are more of these secrets than in the rest of the
heavens, because we live in a marriage of love and wisdom. But I
predict that none will make that love their own except those who
are received by the Lord into the New Church, which is the New
Jerusalem.”Saying this, the angel sent the unrolled sheet of paper down,
and one angelic spirit took it and placed it on a table in a
particular room, which he immediately locked. And handing me the
key he said, “Write.”
-
- Three newcomers from the world instructed
about marriages in heaven (no. 44).- 44. [Three newcomers]
44. The second account:
I once saw three spirits newly arrived from the world, who were
wandering about, exploring and asking questions. They were in a
state of astonishment that they were living as people just as
before and that they were seeing the same things as before. For
they knew they had departed from the former or natural world, and
they had believed there that they would not live as people until
after the day of the Last Judgment, when they would be clothed
with the flesh and bones laid in their graves.To remove all doubt that they were still truly people,
therefore, they alternately inspected and touched themselves and
others, and handled the things they found, and in a thousand ways
kept convincing themselves that they were now people as they had
been in the former world, except that they were seeing each other
in a brighter light and the things they found in a greater
splendor, thus seeing them more perfectly.[2] Then by chance two angelic spirits met them and stopped
them, saying, “Where are you from?”And they answered, “We have departed from the world and
are again living in a world, so we have traveled from one world to
another. At this we are now marveling!”Then the three newcomers began asking the two angelic spirits
about heaven. And because two of the three newcomers were
adolescents, and from their eyes darted what seemed to be a spark
of lust for the opposite sex, the angelic spirits said, “You
have, perhaps, seen some of the women.”And they replied, “We have.”
So, because the newcomers had asked about heaven, the angelic
spirits told them the following:“In heaven all things are magnificent and splendid, and
are such as eye has never seen. There are also young men and women
there, young women of such beauty that they may be called the very
pictures of beauty, and young men of such morality that they may
be called the very pictures of morality. And the beauty of the
young women and the morality of the young men correspond to each
other, as reciprocal and mutually adaptable forms.”The two newcomers then asked whether human forms in heaven are
entirely similar to human forms in the natural world. And the
angelic spirits answered that they are completely alike, with
nothing taken from either man or woman.“In a word,” the angelic spirits said, “a man is
still a man, and a woman is still a woman, in all the perfection
of the form in which they were created. Step aside, if you like,
and investigate in your own case whether anything is missing to
keep you from being the man you were before.”[3] Again the newcomers said, “We heard in the world from
which we departed that in heaven they are not given in marriage,
because they are angels.[*1] Is love between the sexes possible,
then?”The angelic spirits replied, “The love you mean between
the sexes is not possible there, but an angelic love for the
opposite sex is, which is chaste, free of any temptation arising
from lust.”To this the newcomers said, “If love for the opposite sex
is without temptation, then what is love between the sexes?”And when they began to think about that love, they groaned and
said, “How dry the joy of heaven is! What young man can then
wish for heaven? Is not a love like that sterile and devoid of
life?”To this the angelic spirits laughingly replied, “Angelic
love for the opposite sex, or the kind of love that exists in
heaven, is still full of the deepest delights. It is a most
pleasant swelling of everything in the mind and consequently of
everything in the breast, and within the breast it is as if the
heart were sporting with the lungs. From this sport comes a
breathing, tone and speech which cause the companionships between
the sexes, or between young men and women, to be heavenly
sweetness itself, which is at the same time pure.[4] “All newcomers on ascending to heaven are examined in
respect to what their chastity is like, for they are introduced
into companionships with young women – the beauties of heaven –
and these perceive what the newcomers are like in regard to their
love for the opposite sex. They perceive it from their tone of
voice, their speech, their facial expression, their eyes, their
bearing, and the atmosphere emanating from them. If the love is
unchaste, the young women then run away and report to their
friends that they have seen satyrs or lechers. And what is more,
the newcomers undergo a change, and to the eyes of the angels they
appear hairy, with feet like those of calves or leopards. They are
also soon cast down, to keep them from polluting the atmosphere
there with their lust.”Listening to this, the two newcomers again said, “Then
there is no love between the sexes in heaven. What is chaste love
between the sexes but love emptied of the essence of its life? Are
the companionships of young men and women there not then dry joys?
We are not made of stone and wood, but of living perceptions and
affections!”[5] When the two angelic spirits heard this, they indignantly
retorted, “You do not know at all what a chaste love between
the sexes is, because you are not yet chaste! That love is a true
delight of the mind and so of the heart, and not at the same time
of the flesh below the heart. Angelic chastity, which is found
equally in both sexes, prevents that love from passing beyond the
confines of the heart. But within those confines, and above them,
the morality of the young man and the beauty of the young woman
find delight in the delights of a chaste love for the opposite sex
– delights which are deeper and richer for their pleasantness than
can be described in words.“But this is the love that angels have for the opposite
sex, because they have only married love, and married love is not
possible at the same time as an unchaste love for the opposite
sex. True married love is a chaste love, and has nothing in common
with unchaste love. It is with one and only one of the opposite
sex, with all others set aside, for it is a love of the spirit and
consequently of the body, and not a love of the body and
consequently of the spirit, that is, it is not a love that infests
the spirit.”[6] On hearing this, the two adolescent newcomers rejoiced and
said, “Then there is still love between the sexes in heaven!
What else is married love?”But to this the angelic spirits replied, “Think more
deeply, weigh the matter, and you will see that the love you mean
between the sexes is a love outside of marriage, and that married
love is altogether different, being as different from the love you
mean as the wheat is from the chaff, or better, as different as
human life is from animal life.“If you were to ask women in heaven what love outside of
marriage is, I assure you they would respond, “What is this?
What are you saying? How can such a thing that so offends the ears
come out of your mouth? How can a love not created in the first
place be engendered in a person?”“If you then asked them what true married love is, I know
they would answer that it is not a love for the opposite sex, but
love for one of the sex, which arises only when a young man sees a
young woman provided by the Lord, and the young woman the young
man, both feeling an inclination to marry kindled in their hearts,
and perceiving, the young man that she is for him, and the young
woman that he is for her. For love then presents itself to love
and causes them to recognize each other, at once joining their
souls, and afterwards their minds. From there it enters their
hearts, and after the wedding goes on beyond. And so it becomes a
full love, which daily grows into union, even to the point that
they no longer are two, but virtually one person.[7] “I know, too, that these same women would swear that
they are not acquainted with any other love between the sexes. For
they say, “How can there be love between the sexes unless it
is so honest and reciprocal that it aspires to eternal union,
which is that the two may be one flesh?””To this the angelic spirits added, “In heaven they do not
know at all what licentiousness is, not even that it exists or is
possible. The angels grow cold with their whole body at unchaste
love or love outside of marriage, and on the other hand, they grow
warm with their whole body as a result of chaste or married love.
In the case of men there, all their sinews sink at the sight of a
licentious woman, and grow taut at the sight of their wife.”[8] The three newcomers, hearing this, asked whether there is
the same love-making between married partners in heaven as on
earth.The two angelic spirits answered that it is entirely the same.
And because they perceived that the newcomers were wanting to know
whether they had the same end delights in heaven, they also said
that these are entirely the same, but much more blissful, since
the perception and sensation of angels is much more exquisite than
the perception and sensation of people.“Moreover, what is the life accompanying that love,”
the angelic spirits asked, “if it does not stem from an
underlying condition of ability? If this ability fails, does that
love not fail and cool? Is this power not a real measure, a real
progression and real foundation of that love? Is it not its
beginning, support and fulfillment?“It is a universal law that the primary elements in a
series exist, subsist and persist on the basis of the final
elements. So also with that love. Consequently, without the end
delights, there would not be any delights in married love.”[9] The newcomers then asked whether as a result of the end
delights of that love, children are born in heaven. And if
children were not born, of what use those delights were.The angelic spirits replied that they do not have any natural
offspring, but spiritual offspring.“And what are spiritual offspring?” the newcomers
asked.The angelic spirits answered, “By the end delights the two
partners become more united in a marriage of goodness and truth,
and a marriage of goodness and truth is a marriage of love and
wisdom, and love and wisdom are the offspring that are born of
such a marriage. Because the husband in heaven is a form of
wisdom, and his wife is a form of the love of it, and both
moreover are spiritual, therefore no other than spiritual
offspring can be conceived and begotten there.“That is why, after experiencing these delights, angels do
not become depressed as some do on earth, but joyful, and they
have this characteristic as a result of a continual influx of
fresh vigor to follow the first – fresh vigor that rejuvenates and
at the same time enlightens them. For, all who come into heaven
return into the springtime of their youth and into the powers of
that age, and so they remain to eternity.”[10] When the three newcomers heard this, they said, “Does
it not say in the Word that there are no marriages in heaven,
because they are angels?”[*2]To this the angelic spirits replied, “Look up into heaven,
and you will receive an answer.”They then asked why they should look up into heaven.
“Because,” the angelic spirits said, “we have
all our interpretations of the Word from heaven. The Word is
inwardly spiritual, and the angels, being spiritual, must explain
its spiritual meaning.”Then, after some time, heaven opened over their heads and they
caught sight of two angels. And the two angels said, “There
are marriages in heaven, as on earth, but only in the case of
people there who already possess a marriage of goodness and truth.
They are the only ones who become angels. Therefore spiritual
marriages are meant in the Word, which are marriages of goodness
and truth. These spiritual marriages take place on earth and not
after death, thus not in heaven. So it is said of the five foolish
virgins – even though they, too, were invited to the wedding –
that they could not go in, because they did not have a marriage of
goodness and truth, since they had no oil, but only lamps.[*3]“Goodness is meant by oil, and truth by lamps. And to be
given in marriage is to enter into heaven where that marriage is.”The three newcomers were glad to hear this explanation, and
were filled with a longing for heaven and the hope of being
married there. And they said, “We will strive for morality
and a decent and proper life, that we may obtain the object of our
prayers.”[*1] See Matthew 22:30, Mark 12:25, Luke 20:35,36.
[*2] See Matthew 22:30, Mark 12:25, Luke 20:35,36.
[*3] See Matthew 25:1-12.
- 44. [Three newcomers]
-
- 45. THE STATE OF MARRIED PARTNERS AFTER DEATH
-
- 45. [What will happen to my marriage?]
We have just shown in the preceding chapter that marriages exist
in heaven. In this chapter we will now show whether or not a
marriage covenant contracted in the world will continue and remain
in force after death.It is necessary that I make this known, because it is not a
matter of judgment but of personal experience, and I have had this
experience through association with angels and spirits.
Nevertheless, I must make it known in such a way that reason may
also assent.Among the prayers and yearnings of married partners, moreover,
is a wish to know the state of married partners after death. For
men who have loved their wives wish to know – if their wives have
died – whether it is well with them. So, too, wives who have loved
their husbands. And they want to know whether they will meet again.Many married couples also would like to know in advance whether
partners separate after death or whether they stay together. Those
who are discordant in spirit wish to know whether partners
separate. And those who are concordant in spirit wish to know
whether they stay together.Because these are some of the things people would like answers
to, they will be made known, and this will be done in the following
order:(1) In every person after death, love for the opposite sex
continues to be what it was like inwardly, that is, what it was
like in the person’s inner will and thought in the world.(2) Likewise married love.
(3) Most married couples meet after death, recognize each other,
associate again, and live together for a time, which occurs in
their first state, thus while they are still maintaining the
outward aspects of their lives as they did in the world.(4) Progressively, however, as married partners put off outward
appearances and enter into their inward qualities, they gradually
perceive what sort of love and mutual feeling they had had for each
other, and consequently whether it is possible for them to live
together or not.(5) If it is possible for married partners to live together,
they remain partners. But if it is not possible, they separate, the
husband sometimes separating from the wife, the wife sometimes from
the husband, and both of them sometimes from each other.(6) A man is then given a suitable wife, and a woman, likewise,
a suitable husband.(7) Married couples enjoy the same intimate relations with each
other as in the world, only more delightful and blessed, but
without begetting children. Instead of or to take the place of
begetting children, they experience a spiritual procreation, which
is one of love and wisdom.(8) This is what happens in the case of people who come into
heaven. It is different, however, with those who go to hell.Development of this outline now follows, elucidating and
supporting the various statements:
- 45. [What will happen to my marriage?]
- (1) In every person after death, love for the
opposite sex continues to be what it was like inwardly, that is,
what it was like in the person’s inner will and thought in the
world.-
- 46. [Sexuality continues]
46. (1) In every person after death, love for the opposite sex
continues to be what it was like inwardly, that is, what it was
like in the person’s inner will and thought in the world. All a
person’s love goes with him after death, because love is the inner
being of his life. And the dominant love, which heads the rest,
remains in a person to eternity, along with other loves
subordinate to it. These loves remain, because love is properly an
affection of the spirit in a person and is felt in the body from
the spirit. And since a person becomes a spirit after death, he
consequently carries his love with him. Moreover, since love is
the inner being of a person’s life, it is apparent that a person’s
lot after death becomes such as his life was in the world.As regards love for the opposite sex, this is universal in all
people, for it is implanted from the moment of creation in a
person’s very soul, from which comes the essential nature of the
whole person, and it is implanted for the sake of propagating the
human race. This love remains especially, because after death a
man is still a man, and a woman is still a woman, and there is
nothing in the soul, mind, or body which is not masculine in the
male and feminine in the female; and the two sexes have been so
created as to strive for conjunction, indeed, for conjunction in
order that they may become one. This impulse is the love for the
opposite sex which precedes married love.Now because an inclination to conjunction has been engraved on
each and every element in the male and female, it follows that
this inclination cannot be wiped out or die with the body.
- 46. [Sexuality continues]
- 47. [Only the inner qualities]
47. Love for the opposite sex continues to be what it was like
in the world inwardly for the reason that in every person there is
an inward aspect and an outward aspect. These two are also called
the inner person and the outer person, and so there is an inner
and outer will and thought. A person leaves the outward aspect
behind when he dies, and he keeps his inner self. For outward
qualities are properly those of his body, while the inner
qualities are properly those of his spirit.Now because a person is what his love is, and love has its seat
in his spirit, it follows that love for the opposite sex remains
in a person after death and continues to be what it was like
inwardly in him. So, for example, if that love inwardly had been
married or chaste, it continues to be married and chaste after
death. But if it had been inwardly licentious, it continues to be
also like that after death.It must be known, however, that love for the opposite sex is
not the same in one person as in another. Its variations are
limitless. But still, whatever it is like in each person’s spirit,
so it also remains.
-
- (2) Likewise married love.
- 48. [Married love continues]
48. (2) Married love likewise continues to be what it was like
inwardly, that is, what it was like in the inner will and thought
in the person in the world. Since a love for the opposite sex is
one kind of love and married love another, therefore we mention
both and say that married love also remains after death and
continues to be what it was like in a person, in his inner self,
when he lived in the world. But because few people know the
difference between a love for the opposite sex and married love, I
must therefore say something about it at the outset of this
discussion.A love for the opposite sex is love for several of the opposite
sex and experienced with several, whereas married love is love
solely for one of the opposite sex and experienced with one. Love
for several and experienced with several is moreover a natural
love, being shared in common with animals and birds, which are
natural, while married love is a spiritual love, being particular
and peculiar to human beings, because human beings were created
and are thus born to become spiritual. The more spiritual a person
becomes, therefore, the more he divests himself of a love for the
opposite sex and clothes himself in married love.It appears to begin with in marriage as though a love for the
opposite sex were bound together with married love. But as the
marriage progresses, the two loves are separated, and then in the
case of people who are spiritual, a love for the opposite sex is
banished and married love insinuated. In the case of those who are
natural, however, the opposite occurs.From what we have now said, it is apparent that a love for the
opposite sex is impure and unchaste, because it is experienced
with several and is in itself natural, being, in fact, animal, and
that it is licentious, because it is promiscuous and not
restricted. It is altogether different, on the other hand, with
married love.In the following chapters it will be clearly seen that married
love is spiritual and peculiarly human.
- 48. [Married love continues]
- (3) Most married couples meet after death,
recognize each other, associate again, and live together for a time,
which occurs in their first state, thus while they are still
maintaining the outward aspects of their lives as they did in the
world.- 47r. [Married couples after death]
47r. [repeated][*1] (3) Most married couples meet after death,
recognize each other, associate, and live together for a time,
which occurs in their first state, thus while they are still
maintaining the outward aspects of their lives as they did in the
world. There are two states that a person goes through after
death, an external state and an internal state. A person comes
first into the external state, and afterwards into the internal
one. It is during the external state – if both partners have died
– that they meet, recognize each other, and, if they lived
together in the world, associate and live together for a time. And
when they are in this state, one partner does not know the other’s
feelings toward him, because these feelings keep themselves hidden
inside.Later, however, when they come into their internal state, the
feelings manifest themselves. And if these feelings are concordant
and congenial, the partners continue their married life. But if
these feelings are discordant and uncongenial, they end it.If a man has had several wives, he associates with them in
turn, so long as he is in the external state. But when he comes
into the internal state, and perceives what their feelings of love
are like, he then either chooses one or leaves them all. For in
the spiritual world, just as in the natural world, a Christian is
never allowed to have several wives, because this attacks religion
and profanes it.A similar thing happens with a wife who has had several
husbands, although wives in this case do not attach themselves to
their husbands. They only present themselves, and the husbands
attach the wives to them.Let it be known that husbands rarely recognize their wives, but
that wives readily recognize their husbands. The reason is that
women have an interior perception of love, while men have only a
more superficial perception.
- 47r. [Married couples after death]
- (4) Progressively, however, as married
partners put off outward appearances and enter into their inward
qualities, they gradually perceive what sort of love and mutual
feeling they had had for each other, and consequently whether it is
possible for them to live together or not.- 48r. [whether it is possible for them to live
together or not]48r. [repeated] (4) Progressively, however, as married partners
put off outward appearances and enter into their inward qualities,
they gradually perceive what sort of love and mutual feeling they
had had for each other, and consequently whether it is possible
for them to live together or not. There is no need to explain this
further, since it follows as a conclusion from what was explained
under the preceding heading. We will only clarify here how it is
that a person puts off outward appearances and takes on inward
qualities.Everyone is first introduced after death into a world that is
called the world of spirits, which is midway between heaven and
hell; and there he is prepared, for heaven if he is good, and for
hell if he is evil. [2] The purpose of the preparation in that
world is to bring the inner reality and the outer appearance into
harmony, so that the internal and external become one, instead of
being at variance and divided in two. They are divided in two in
the natural world, and only in the case of people who have an
honest heart do they become one. (That they are divided in two is
apparent from crafty and deceitful people, especially from
hypocrites, flatterers, fakes and liars.)In the spiritual world, however, one is not permitted to have a
mind divided like that, but a person who had been evil inwardly
must also be evil outwardly. So, too, with a good person, who must
be good in both ways. [3] For every person after death becomes
what he had been like inwardly, and not what he had been like
outwardly.To achieve this end, the person is then brought by turns into
his external character and alternately into his internal one. And
everybody is wise so long as he is in his external character; that
is, he tries to appear wise – even one who is evil. But if he is
evil, the same person is irrational in his internal character. By
these alternations he can see his insanities and recover from
them. However, if he had not come to his senses in the world, he
cannot do so afterward, because he loves his insanities and wants
to remain in them. Therefore he forces his external character into
becoming similarly irrational as well. So his internal and
external characters become one, and when this happens, he is ready
for hell.[4] It is quite different, on the other hand, if the person is
good. Because he had looked to God and come to his senses in the
world, in his internal character he was wiser than in his external
life. In his external life he sometimes even acted irrationally
owing to the enticements and vanities of the world. Therefore his
external character is also reduced to harmony with his internal
one, which, as we said, is wise. And when this happens, he is
ready for heaven.This makes clear how it is that the outward character is put
off and the internal character taken on after death.[*1] Numbers 47 and 48 were used twice by Swedenborg
- 48r. [whether it is possible for them to live
- (5) If it is possible for married partners to
live together, they remain partners. But if it is not possible, they
separate, the husband sometimes separating from the wife, the wife
sometimes from the husband, and both of them sometimes from each
other.- 49. [They sometimes separate]
49. (5) If it is possible for married partners to live
together, they remain partners. But if it is not possible, they
separate, the husband sometimes separating from the wife, the wife
sometimes from the husband, and both of them sometimes from each
other. The reason separations occur after death is that unions
formed on earth are seldom formed on the basis of any internal
perception of love, but as the result of an external perception
which conceals the internal one.An external perception of love takes its cause and origin from
such things as have to do with love of the world and love of one’s
own person. Love of the world is concerned primarily with wealth
and possessions, and love of one’s own person with positions of
rank and honor. In addition to these, there are also various other
attractions that entice into marriage, such as good looks and a
pretended elegance of manners. Sometimes even a lack of chastity
attracts.Furthermore, marriages are also contracted in the area, city or
town of one’s birth or residence, where the only choice possible
is confined and limited to the households one knows, and there
only with people of a station matching one’s own.As a result, marriages entered into in the world are for the
most part external marriages, and not at the same time internal,
even though it is the internal union or union of souls that makes
a real marriage. And that internal union is not discernible until
a person has put off his external character and taken on his
internal character, which happens after death.That, now, is why separations then occur, followed by new
unions formed with partners of a similar and compatible nature –
unless unions like this were provided on earth, which happens in
the case of people who from their youth had loved, desired and
sought from the Lord a lawful and lovely partnership with one, and
who spurn and reject roving lusts as an offense to the nostrils.
- 49. [They sometimes separate]
- (6) A man is then given a suitable wife, and
a woman, likewise, a suitable husband.- 50. [They find suitable partners]
50. (6) A man is then given a suitable wife, and a woman,
likewise, a suitable husband. This is because the only married
couples who can be accepted into heaven so as to remain there are
those who have been inwardly united, or who can be united as
though into one. For married couples in heaven are not called two
but one angel. This is meant by the Lord’s words, that they are no
longer two but one flesh.[*1]The reason these are the only married couples who can be
accepted into heaven is that they are the only ones who can live
together there, that is, who can be together in the same house and
in the same bedroom and bed. For all those who are in heaven are
associated according to the affinities and close similarities of
their love, and their homes are determined accordingly. This is
because there are no dimensional spaces in the spiritual world,
but they have appearances of space, and these appearances are
determined according to the states of their life, and their states
of life are determined according to states of love.Consequently, no one in the spiritual world can stay anywhere
but in his own house, which is provided and appointed for him
according to the nature of his love. If he stays anywhere else,
his chest labors and he has difficulty breathing. By the same
token, two people cannot live together in the same house unless
they are likenesses of each other. And they cannot live together
at all as married partners unless their feelings for each other
are mutual. If these feelings of attraction are external and not
at the same time internal, the very house or place separates them,
repels them and drives them away.So it is that, in the case of people who after preparation are
introduced into heaven, marriage is provided with a partner whose
soul inclines to union with the soul of the other, to the point
that they do not wish to lead two lives but one. That is why,
after separation, a man is given a suitable wife, and a woman,
likewise, a suitable husband.[*1] Matthew 19:6, Mark 10:8.
- 50. [They find suitable partners]
- (7) Married couples enjoy the same intimate
relations with each other as in the world, only more delightful and
blessed, but without begetting children. Instead of or to take the
place of begetting children, they experience a spiritual
procreation, which is one of love and wisdom.-
- 51. [Intimate relations]
51. (7) Married couples enjoy the same intimate relations with
each other as in the world, only more delightful and blessed, but
without begetting children. Instead of or to take the place of
begetting children, they experience a spiritual procreation, which
is one of love and wisdom. Married couples enjoy the same intimate
relations as in the world for the reason that after death a male
is still a male and a female is still a female, and an inclination
to conjunction has been implanted in each of the sexes from
creation. In the human being, moreover, this inclination is an
inclination of the person’s spirit, and of the body as a result of
his spirit.After death, therefore, when a person becomes a spirit, the
same mutual inclination continues, and this would not be possible
without a continuation of the same relations. For people are
people as they were before, and nothing is missing from the male,
and nothing from the female. They are the same as they were before
in form, likewise in their affections and thoughts.What other conclusion follows from this, then, but that they
have the same intimate relations? And because married love is
chaste, pure and sacred, that their intimate relations are also
full and complete? (But for more on this subject, see the
narrative account in no. 44.)The reason these relations are then more delightful and blessed
is that when a person becomes a spirit, this love then becomes
more interior and pure and so more capable of being perceived, and
every delight increases with a person’s perception of it,
increasing even to the point that the blessedness of the love is
noticed in its delight.
- 51. [Intimate relations]
- 52. [Spiritual offspring]
52. The reason marriages in heaven do not result in the
begetting of children, but that instead they experience a
spiritual procreation, which is one of love and wisdom – the
reason is that in the case of people who are in the spiritual
world, a third element is missing, which is the natural element.
This element is the containing vessel of spiritual things, and
spiritual things without their containing vessel do not assume
fixed form like those that are produced in the natural world.
Also, regarded in themselves, spiritual things relate to love and
wisdom. Consequently, it is spiritual things that are born of
their marriages.We say that these are born, because married love perfects an
angel, since it unites him with his partner so that he becomes
more and more human. For, as we said above, married couples in
heaven are not two but one angel. Therefore by the marital union
they fulfill themselves in respect to their humanity, which is to
want to be wise and to love what has to do with wisdom.
-
- (8) This is what happens in the case of
people who come into heaven. It is different, however, with those
who go to hell.-
- 53. [No marriage in hell]
53. (8) This is what happens in the case of people who come
into heaven. It is different, however, with those who go to hell.
When we say that after death a man is given a suitable wife, and a
woman, likewise, a suitable husband, and that they enjoy
delightful and blessed relations, but without any procreation
other than a spiritual procreation, it should be understood that
we are referring to people who are received into heaven and become
angels. That is because these people are spiritual, and marriages
are in themselves spiritual, and therefore sacred.In contrast, however, those people who go to hell are all
natural people, and merely natural marriages are not marriages,
but pairings that result from unchaste lust. What these pairings
are like will be told later, in the chapter on chastity and its
absence,[*1] and further in the chapters on licentious love.[*2][*1] See nos. 138ff.
[*2] See nos. 423ff.
- 53. [No marriage in hell]
- 54. [Who separates after death]
54. To what we have related so far about the state of married
partners after death, we should add the following:1. All those married partners who are merely natural, separate
after death. The reason is that the love of being married is cold
in them, and a love for committing adultery warm. Nevertheless,
following that separation they still sometimes form associations
with others as married partners, although after a short time they
part from each other. Quite often this happens repeatedly, with
one person after another. And finally the man is handed over to
some licentious woman, and the woman to some adulterer, which
takes place in a prison in hell (as described in The Apocalypse
Revealed, no. 153, paragraph 10). There, promiscuous
licentiousness is forbidden to both under pain of punishment.[2] 2. When one partner is spiritual and the other natural,
they, too, separate after death, and a suitable husband or wife is
given to the spiritual partner, while the natural one is consigned
to his or her like in places of lasciviousness.[3] 3. Moreover, in the case of people who lived a celibate
life in the world and completely turned their minds away from
marriage, if they are spiritual, they remain celibate. But if they
are natural, they become licentious.It is different, however, if during their unmarried state they
had wanted to marry, and still more if they had sought marriage
without success. If these people are spiritual, they are provided
blessed marriages, though not before they come into heaven.[4] 4. In the case of people who in the world were shut away in
convents and monasteries, both unmarried women and men, their
cloistered life continues for some period of time after death. At
the end of this time they are released and let go, and they gain
the desired freedom they had prayed for, either to live married,
if they wish, or not. If they wish to marry, they become married.
If not, they are conveyed to other celibates at the side of
heaven. Those who burned with forbidden lust, however, are cast
down.[5] 5. The reason celibates live at the side of heaven is
because the atmosphere of permanent celibacy disturbs the
atmosphere of married love, which is the essential atmosphere of
heaven. The atmosphere of married love is the essential atmosphere
of heaven because it descends from the heavenly marriage of the
Lord and the church.
-
- Concerning a chaste love for the opposite sex
(no. 55).- 55. [Chaste love]
55. To this I will append two narrative accounts. Here is the
first:I once heard a very sweet melody coming from heaven. The
singers there were wives, and also young women, who were singing a
little song together. The sweetness of the singing sounded like
the harmoniously flowing affection of some love. (Heavenly songs
are nothing else but voiced affections, or affections expressed
and varied in musical tones. For as thoughts are expressed in
spoken words, so affections are expressed in the singing of songs.
Angels perceive the subject of the affection from the balance and
flow of the musical variations.)I had many spirits around me at the time, and I heard from some
of them that they were listening to this very sweet melody, and
that it was the melody of a some lovely affection whose subject
they did not know. Therefore they began to make various guesses,
but without success. Some guessed that the singing expressed the
affection of a bridegroom and bride when they become engaged. Some
supposed that it expressed the affection of a bridegroom and bride
when they celebrate their wedding. And some thought that it
expressed the early love of a husband and wife.[2] However, an angel from heaven then appeared in the midst of
them, and he said that they were singing about a chaste love for
the opposite sex.But the spirits standing around asked what a chaste love for
the opposite sex was.So the angel said that it is the love of a man for a maiden or
married woman beautiful in form and lovely in manners, which is
free of any idea of lasciviousness, and vice versa [that is, the
same sort of love of a woman for a single or married man].”Having said that, the angel vanished.
The singing continued, and now that the spirits knew the
subject of the affection that the singing expressed, they began to
hear it with a great deal of variety, each in accordance with the
state of his own love. Those who looked upon women chastely heard
the singing as harmonious and sweet. Those, however, who looked
upon women unchastely heard it as discordant and sorrowful. And
those who looked upon women with repugnance heard it as harsh and
grating.[3] But then, suddenly, the plain on which they were standing
was turned into a theater, and they heard a voice say, “Examine
and discuss this love.”Suddenly, too, spirits from various societies were present, and
in the midst of them some angels in white. And the angels then
addressed them saying, “We have inquired into all kinds of
love in this spiritual world, not only the love of a man for a
man, and of a woman for a woman, and the mutual love of a husband
and wife, but also the love of a man for women, and the love of a
woman for men. We have been allowed to pass through society after
society as well, and to investigate, and we have not yet found the
prevailing love for the opposite sex to be chaste, except in those
who, because of their true married love, are in a constant state
of sexual ability, and these are in the highest heavens.“Moreover, we have also been granted to perceive an influx
of this chaste love for the opposite sex into the affections of
our hearts, and we felt it exceed every other love in its
sweetness, except the love of two married partners whose hearts
are one.“But we pray you examine and discuss this love, because to
you it is new and unknown. Also, because it is so exceedingly
pleasant, in heaven we call it heavenly sweetness.”[4] As they were therefore discussing it, the first to speak
were spirits who could not think of chastity as applying to
marriages, and they said, “When one sees a beautiful and
lovely woman, maiden or married, is there anyone who can so
chasten the ideas in his thought and so purify them from lust that
he loves her beauty, yet without at all wishing to taste it if he
could? Who can turn the instinctive lust that every man feels into
chasteness like that, thus into something against his own nature,
and still feel love? When love for the opposite sex enters from
the eyes into the thoughts, can it stop at a woman’s face? Does it
not instantly descend to her breast and beyond?“The angels have spoken nonsense, saying that a chaste
love like that exists and yet is the sweetest of all loves, and
that it is only possible in husbands who are in a state of true
married love and who consequently possess an extraordinary sexual
ability with their wives. When these husbands see beautiful women,
can they hold the ideas of their thought on high any more than
others, and keep them suspended, so to speak, to prevent those
ideas from descending and extending to that which prompts such a
love?”[5] After them, spirits spoke who were in both a state of
coldness and a state of heat, in a state of coldness towards their
wives and in a state of heat towards the opposite sex. And they
said, “What is a chaste love for the opposite sex? Is it not
a contradiction in terms when the word chastity is added to love
and sex? What is left when a contradictory adjective is added but
something robbed of its proper attribute, which is meaningless?
How can a chaste love for the opposite sex be the sweetest of all
loves when it is chastity that deprives it of its sweetness? You
all know in what the sweetness of that love lies. Consequently,
when the idea naturally accompanying this love is banished, where
is the sweetness then, and what does it come from?”Some others then interrupted and said, “We have been in
the company of some very beautiful women, and we have not lusted.
Therefore we know what a chaste love for the opposite sex is.”But their companions, who knew their lascivious natures,
replied, “You were then in a state of antipathy toward the
opposite sex owing to impotence, and that is not a chaste love for
the opposite sex but the final result of an unchaste love.”[6] Having heard these things, the angels crossly asked the
spirits who were standing to the right, towards the south, to
speak, and these spirits said, “There is a love between men,
also a love between women, and there is the love of a man for a
woman and the love of a woman for a man. And these three pairs of
loves are completely different from each other.“Love between two men is like the love between one
intellect and another, for men were created and so are born to
become forms of understanding.“Love between two women is like the love between one
affection and another for the understanding of men, for women were
created and are born to become forms of love for the understanding
of men.“These loves, namely, the love between two men and the
love between two women, do not enter deeply into their hearts, but
remain outside and only touch. Thus these loves do not unite the
two of them interiorly.“That is why two men together also spar with each other
with endless arguments, like two athletes boxing, and two women
sometimes as well, with endless insistence on their own wishes,
like two marionettes battling with their fists.[7] “On the other hand, the love between a man and a woman
is a love between intellect and its affection, and this enters
deeply and unites them. The union also is the love. But a union of
the minds and not at the same time of the bodies, or an effort to
a union of minds only, is a spiritual love and therefore a chaste
love. This love is possible only in those who are in a state of
true married love and who consequently possess an elevated
sexuality, because men like this, out of chastity, do not permit
themselves to feel an influx of love on account of the body of any
other woman than their wife. And because they possess a highly
elevated sexuality, they cannot help but love the opposite sex and
at the same time turn their backs on anything unchaste.“Thus they have a chaste love for the opposite sex, which
regarded in itself is interior spiritual friendship. This
friendship takes its sweetness from an elevated sexuality, but one
that is chaste. These men have an elevated sexuality owing to
their total renunciation of licentiousness. And it is chaste,
because they are only in love with their wives.“Now, then, because that love in them does not partake of
the flesh but only of the spirit, it is chaste. And because the
beauty of a woman, owing to the inherent attraction, enters at the
same time into their mind, it is sweet.”[8] On hearing this, many of those standing around put their
hands to their ears, saying, “Your words hurt our ears! The
things you have said are meaningless to us.”These spirits were unchaste.
Then again, the singing was heard from heaven, and now sweeter
than before. But to those unchaste spirits, it grated so
discordantly that because of the harshness of the discord, they
threw themselves out of the theater and ran away, the few spirits
remaining being those who in their wisdom loved marital chastity.
- 55. [Chaste love]
- The Temple of Wisdom, where wise men
discussed the reasons for the beauty in the female sex (no. 56).- 56.[Beauty in women]
56. The second account:
One time, while speaking with angels in the spiritual world, I
was filled with a pleasant wish to see the Temple of Wisdom, which
I had seen once before.[*1] So I asked the angels about the way to
it.They said, “Follow the light, and you will find it.”
And I said, “What do you mean, follow the light?”
They said, “Our light grows brighter the closer we get to
that temple. Follow the light, therefore, in the direction it
grows brighter. For our light emanates from the Lord as the sun of
this world, and so, regarded in itself, that light is wisdom.”In the company of two angels I then went in the direction that
the light grew brighter, and I ascended by a steep path to the top
of a certain hill which was in the southern zone, where I found a
magnificent gate. When the guard saw the angels with me, he opened
it, and behold, I saw an avenue of palm trees and laurels, which
we followed. The avenue curved around and ended up at a garden, in
the middle of which stood the Temple of Wisdom.As I looked around in the garden, I saw some smaller buildings,
replicas of the temple, with wise men in them. We went over to one
of the buildings, and we spoke at the entrance with the
receptionist there, telling him the reason for our coming and the
way we had arrived. And the receptionist said, “Welcome! Come
in, have a seat, and let us spend some time together in
conversations of wisdom.”[2] I saw inside that the building was divided into two
sections, and yet the two were still one. It was divided into two
sections by a transparent partition, but it looked like one room
because of the partition’s transparency, which was like the
transparency of the purest crystal. I asked why it was arranged
like that.The receptionist said, “I am not alone. My wife is with
me, and though we are two, yet we are not two but one flesh.”To which I replied, “I know you are wise, but what does a
wise man or wisdom have to do with a woman?”At this, with some feeling of annoyance, the receptionist’s
expression changed, and he stretched out his hand, and suddenly,
then, other wise men were present from the neighboring buildings.
To them he said with amusement, “Our visitor here says he
wants to know what a wise man or wisdom has to do with a woman!”They all laughed at this and said, “What is a wise man or
wisdom apart from a woman or apart from love? A wife is the love
of a wise man’s wisdom.”[3] But the receptionist said, “Let us join together now
in some conversation of wisdom. Let the conversation be about
causes, today the reason for the beauty in the female sex.”So they then spoke in turn. And the first speaker gave this
reason, that women were created by the Lord to be forms of
affection for the wisdom in men, and affection for wisdom is
beauty itself.The second speaker gave this reason, that woman was created by
the Lord through the wisdom in man, because she was created from
man, and that she is therefore a form of wisdom inspired by the
affection of love. And because the affection of love is life
itself, a woman is a form of the life in wisdom, while the male is
a form of wisdom, and the life in wisdom is beauty itself.The third speaker presented this reason, that women have been
given a perception of the delights in married love. And because
their whole body is an instrument of that perception, the abode
where the delights of married love dwell with their perception
cannot help but be a form of beauty.[4] The fourth speaker gave this reason, that the Lord took
beauty and grace of life from man and transferred them into woman,
and that is why a man not reunited with his beauty and grace in
woman is stern, severe, dry and unattractive, and also not wise
except for his own sake alone, in which case he is a dunce. On the
other hand, when a man is united with his beauty and grace of life
in a wife, he becomes agreeable, pleasant, full of life and
lovable, and therefore wise.The fifth speaker gave this reason, that women were created to
be beauties, not for their own sake, but for the sake of men, so
that men’s natural hardness might become softer, the natural
solemnness of their dispositions more amiable, and the natural
coldness of their hearts warmer. And this is what happens to them
when they become one flesh with their wives.[5] The sixth speaker offered this reason, that the universe
created by the Lord is a most perfect work, but nothing is created
in it more perfect than a woman attractive in appearance and
becoming in behavior, in order that a man may thank the Lord for
such a gift and repay it by receiving wisdom from Him.After these and several other similar views were expressed, one
of the wives appeared through the crystal-like partition, and she
said to her husband, “Speak, if you wish.”And when he spoke, the life in his wisdom from his wife was
perceived in his speech, for her love was in the tone of his
voice. Thus did experience bear witness to the truth expressed.After this we looked at the Temple of Wisdom, and also at the
things in the paradise surrounding it. And being filled with
feelings of joy on account of them, we departed and went along the
avenue to the gate, and so descended by the way we had come.[*1] See The Apocalypse Revealed, no. 875:4-8 (first published
in Amsterdam, 1766).
- 56.[Beauty in women]
-
- 57. TRUE MARRIED LOVE
-
- 57. [True Married Love]
Married love is unlimited in its variety. It is not the same in
one person as it is in another. It appears, indeed, as if it were
the same in many cases, but that is how it appears to a judgment of
the body, and a person scarcely sees the diversities in such things
on the basis of a judgment like that, because it is dense and
obtuse. By a judgment of the body we mean a judgment of the mind on
the basis of its external senses.People who see as a result of a judgment of the spirit, however,
to them the differences appear, and they appear even more clearly
to those who can raise the sight of this judgment still higher, by
withdrawing this sight from the senses and elevating it into a
higher light. These people are finally able to convince themselves
with the understanding and thus see that married love is not the
same in one person as it is in another.But even so, no one can see the endless varieties of this love
in any light of the understanding, even if elevated, unless he
first knows what that love is like in its true essence and perfect
state, thus what it was like when, together with life, it was
bestowed on mankind by God. Unless this state of it is known, which
was most perfect, its diversities can by no means be discovered by
any method of inquiry. For there is in that case no fixed point
from which, as a point of origin, the diversities may be traced and
to which, as a point of reference, they may be related so as to
appear accurately and not deceptively.For this reason, we proceed in this chapter to describe that
love in its true essence. And since that love existed in its true
essence when, together with life, it was infused into mankind by
God, we proceed to describe it as it was in its original state.
Moreover, because in that state married love was truly married, we
title this chapter, “True married love.”Description of this love, however, will be developed according
to the following outline:(1) There is a true married love, which today is so rare that
people do not know what it is like, and scarcely that it exists.(2) This love originates from the marriage between good and
truth.(3) There is a correspondence between this love and the marriage
of the Lord and the church.(4) Regarded from its origin and correspondence, this love is
celestial, spiritual, holy, pure and clean, more so than any other
love which exists from the Lord in angels of heaven or people of
the church.(5) It is also the fundamental love of all celestial and
spiritual loves, and consequently of natural loves.(6) Moreover, into this love have been gathered all joys and all
delights, from the first to the last of them.(7) But no others come into this love and no others can be in it
but those who go to the Lord and love the truths of the church and
do the good things it teaches.(8) This love was the greatest of loves among the ancients who
lived in the golden, silver and copper ages, but after that it
gradually disappeared.Development of these points now follows.
- 57. [True Married Love]
- (1) There is a true married love, which today
is so rare that people do not know what it is like, and scarcely
that it exists.-
- 58. [The honeymoon is a taste of it]
58. (1) There is a true married love, which today is so rare
that people do not know what it is like, and scarcely that it
exists. The possibility of the kind of married love described in
the following pages may indeed be recognized from the first state
of that love, when it is first stealing into and entering the
heart of a young man and woman, as it does in the case of those
who are beginning to love only one of the opposite sex and to want
him or her as their betrothed. And still more during the time of
engagement, as this stretches on and draws nearer the wedding. And
finally at the time of the wedding, and in the first days after
it.Who does not then acknowledge and give assent to the following
thoughts, that this love is the fundamental love of all loves?
Moreover, that all joys and all delights have been gathered into
it, from the first to the last of them?But who does not also know that after this happy time, these
glad feelings gradually wane and disappear, until at last they are
hardly felt. If at that time one says to these same people the
same thing as before, that this love is the fundamental love of
all loves, and that all joys and delights have been gathered into
it, they neither assent nor acknowledge this. Perhaps they will
even say these are foolish notions, or that they are mysteries
beyond comprehension.It is clear from this that the early love in marriage emulates
true married love and presents a kind of visible image of it. This
is the case because a love for the opposite sex in general, which
is unchaste, is then renounced, and in its place love for one of
the sex sits implanted, which is a true married love and chaste.
What man at that time does not look upon other women with a
loveless nod, and on his one and only with a loving one?
- 58. [The honeymoon is a taste of it]
- 59. [When love is lost]
59. Nevertheless, true married love is so rare that people do
not know what it is like, and scarcely that it exists. This is
because the state of happy feelings before the wedding afterwards
turns into a state of indifference as these feelings become no
longer felt. The reasons for this change in state are too many to
be presented here, but they will be presented in a later chapter,
where the reasons for states of coldness, separations and divorces
are disclosed in turn.[*1] It will be seen from these that in most
people today, the image of married love referred to above is so
extinguished – and with it, knowledge of this love – that people
do not even know what it is like, and scarcely that it exists.People know that every person is merely physical at birth, and
that from being physical he becomes more and more deeply natural,
and thus rational, and finally spiritual. The reason for such a
progressive development is that the physical element is the soil,
so to speak, in which natural, rational and spiritual qualities
are planted in turn. A person thus becomes more and more human.[2] Almost the same sort of thing happens when one enters
marriage. A person then becomes a more complete human being,
because he is united with a partner with whom he may act as one
person. In the first state, however, this is reflected in a kind
of image, as mentioned before. In similar fashion he then starts
from the physical element and progresses into the natural, only
this time in respect to married life and so union into one.People who in this state love the physical, natural aspects,
and the rational aspects only on account of these, cannot be
united with their partner as though into one, except in respect to
these external aspects. When the external aspects then fade, the
inward ones are invaded by coldness, which takes away the delights
of this love, driving them first from the mind and so from the
body, and afterwards from the body and so from the mind. And this
finally reaches the point that nothing remains of their memory of
the early state of their marriage, nor do they consequently retain
any concept of it.Now because this is what happens in the case of most people
today, it is plain that people do not know what true married love
is like, and scarcely that it exists.It is different in the case of people who are spiritual. In
their case, the first state of marriage is an introduction to
continuing states of happiness, which advance as the spiritual
rationality of the mind and consequently the natural sensuality of
the body in one partner join and unite with these same qualities
in the other. But people like this are rare.[*1] See nos. 234ff.
-
- (2) This love originates from the marriage
between good and truth.-
- 60.[The marriage between good and truth]
60. (2) This love originates from the marriage between good and
truth. Everything in the universe has some relation to good and
truth, as every intelligent person recognizes because it is a
universal truth. One cannot help but recognize also that in each
and every thing in the universe, good is united with truth and
truth with good, because this, too, is a universal truth, which
goes along with the other.The reason everything in the universe has some relation to good
and truth, with good being united with truth and vice versa, is
that both emanate from the Lord, and they emanate from Him as a
unity.The two things that emanate from the Lord are love and wisdom,
because these are what He is and so are what come from Him. And
everything that has to do with love is called good, and everything
that has to do with wisdom is called truth. Now because these two
emanate from the Lord as the Creator, it follows that these two
are present in the things He created.This can be illustrated by the example of heat and light which
emanate from the sun. Everything produced by the earth depends on
these two, for things germinate according to their presence and
according to their presence together. Natural warmth corresponds
to spiritual warmth, which is love; and natural light corresponds
to spiritual light, which is wisdom.
- 60.[The marriage between good and truth]
- 61. [Truth from good and good from truth]
61. In the next chapter we will demonstrate that married love
comes from the marriage between good and truth. We only introduce
the concept here to show that this love is celestial, spiritual
and holy, because it comes from a celestial, spiritual and holy
origin.In order to show that married love originates from the marriage
between good and truth, it is useful that something be said about
it in brief summary here.We said just above that there is a union of good and truth in
each and every created thing. And union does not come about
without reciprocation, for union on one side and not on the other
in return, of itself comes undone.Now because there is a union of good and truth, and this a
reciprocal one, it follows that there is a truth of good, or truth
from good, and also a good of truth, or good from truth. In the
next chapter we will show that the truth of good or truth from
good exists in the male and is the essence of masculinity, and
that the good of truth or good from truth exists in the female and
is the essence of femininity. We will also show that there is a
conjugal union between the two.This much is mentioned here to give a preliminary idea of the
concept.
-
- (3) There is a correspondence between this
love and the marriage of the Lord and the church.-
- 62. [The marriage of the Lord and the church]
62. (3) There is a correspondence between this love and the
marriage of the Lord and the church. In other words, as the Lord
loves the church and wants the church to love Him, so a husband
and wife love each other.In the Christian world, people know there is a correspondence
between these two relationships, but they do not yet know the
nature of it. Therefore this correspondence will be explained in a
separate chapter as well, in the chapter after next.[*1] It is
mentioned here in order to show that married love is celestial,
spiritual and holy, because it corresponds to the celestial,
spiritual and holy marriage of the Lord and the church.This correspondence also follows from the origin of married
love from the marriage between good and truth, referred to under
the preceding heading, because the church in a person is a
marriage of good and truth. For a marriage of good and truth is
the same thing as a marriage of charity and faith, since good is a
matter of charity and truth is a matter of faith. One cannot help
but recognize that this marriage forms the church, because it is a
universal truth, and every universal truth is acknowledged as soon
as it is heard, which occurs as a result of the Lord’s influx and,
at the same time, the affirmation of heaven.Now, since the church is the Lord’s, being from the Lord, and
since married love corresponds to the marriage of the Lord and the
church, it follows that this love comes from the Lord.[*1] See “The Marriage of the Lord and the Church and
Correspondence to It,” nos. 116ff.
- 62. [The marriage of the Lord and the church]
- 63. [The Church is complete with both
together.]63. However, the way in which the church is formed by the Lord
in two married partners, and through it married love – this will
be clarified in the chapter indicated above. Here we will say only
that the church is formed by the Lord in the man, and through the
man in his wife. And after it has been formed in the two together,
the church is complete, for then a full conjunction of good and
truth takes place, and the conjunction of good and truth is the
church. It will be progressively established with demonstrative
proofs in the following chapters that the inclination to
conjunction, which married love is, exists in the same degree as
the conjunction of good and truth, which is the church.
-
- (4) Regarded from its origin and
correspondence, this love is celestial, spiritual, holy, pure and
clean, more so than any other love which exists from the Lord in
angels of heaven or people of the church.- 64. [Celestial, spiritual, holy, pure and
clean]64. (4) Regarded from its origin and correspondence, this love
is celestial, spiritual, holy, pure and clean, more so than any
other love which exists from the Lord in angels of heaven or
people of the church. With respect to married love’s being of such
a character from its origin, which is the marriage between good
and truth, this was briefly established just above, though it was
only touched on there. So also with respect to that love’s being
of such a character from its correspondence with the marriage of
the Lord and the church.These two marriages, from which married love descends as an
offshoot, are the essence of holiness. Consequently, if married
love is received from its Author, who is the Lord, it is
accompanied by holiness from Him, which continually purges and
purifies the love. If, then, a person has a desire and striving
for it in his will, that love daily becomes more clean and pure to
eternity.[2] Married love is called celestial and spiritual because it
exists among angels in heaven. It is celestial in the case of
angels in the highest heaven, because these angels are called
celestial. And it is spiritual in the case of angels below that
heaven, because these angels are called spiritual. The angels are
called by these names, because forms of love resulting in wisdom
are celestial, while forms of wisdom resulting in love are
spiritual. It is the same in their approach to marriage.[3] Now, because married love exists among angels in heaven, in
both the higher and lower heavens, as we also showed in the
earlier chapter on marriages in heaven,[*1] it follows that this
love is holy and pure.As for the statement that regarded from its derivation, in its
essence this love is holy and pure, more so than any other love in
angels and men, this is because that love is, so to speak, the
head of all the other loves. Something about its exalted character
will now be said under the following heading.[*1] See nos. 27ff.
- 64. [Celestial, spiritual, holy, pure and
- (5) It is also the fundamental love of all
celestial and spiritual loves, and consequently of natural loves.-
- 65. [The source of other loves]
65. (5) It is also the fundamental love of all celestial,
spiritual, and consequently natural loves. Regarded in its
essence, married love is the fundamental love of all loves in
heaven and the church, because it originates from the marriage
between good and truth, and from this marriage spring all the
loves which form heaven and the church in a person. The good in
this marriage produces love, and the truth in it produces wisdom.
And when love is added to wisdom or united with it, then love
becomes loving. And when wisdom conversely is added to love and
united with it, then wisdom becomes wise.True married love is nothing but a union of love and wisdom.
Two married partners who have this love between them and in them
at the same time are a reflection and image of it. In the heavens,
too, where the looks of their faces are genuine representations of
the affections of their love, they are all likenesses of it, for
it is in them in general and in every part, as we showed
previously.Now because two partners are a form of this love in image and
effigy, it follows that every other love that springs from the
form this love takes is a reflection of it. Consequently, if
married love is celestial and spiritual, the loves springing from
it are also celestial and spiritual.Married love, therefore, is like a parent, and the rest of the
loves are like offspring. That is why the offspring born of the
marriages of angels in heaven are spiritual offspring, which are
procreations of love and wisdom, or of goodness and truth.
(Regarding this procreation, see above, no. 51.)
- 65. [The source of other loves]
-
- 66. [Married partners are forms of love and
wisdom.]66. The same idea clearly follows from the creation of human
beings into this love, and from their formation as a result of it
afterwards. The male was created to become a form of wisdom from a
love of growing wise, and the female was created to become a form
of love for the male on account of his wisdom, thus in accordance
with that wisdom. It is evident from this that two partners are
real forms and reflections of the marriage between love and wisdom
or between good and truth.It should properly be known that no good or truth exists which
is not the attribute of some concrete thing in which it inheres as
a quality in its subject. Abstract goods and truths have no real
existence, because they are not grounded in anything, having no
underlying foundation. Indeed, neither can they be seen as
flitting about in the air. Consequently, as abstractions they are
merely figments, which reason supposes it can think about
abstractly, but which it really cannot except as attributes of
concrete subjects. For every idea a person has, however
extrapolated, is concrete, that is to say, it is attached to
concrete things.It should further be known that no concrete thing exists
without having form. A thing unformed is not anything, because
nothing can be predicated of it, and a subject without predicates
is also the figment of a fanciful imagination.I have added these philosophical considerations in order to be
able to show in this way as well that two married partners who are
in a state of true married love actually are forms of the marriage
between goodness and truth, or between love and wisdom.
- 66. [Married partners are forms of love and
- 67. [Natural loves are the foundation]
67. Since natural loves spring from spiritual loves, and
spiritual loves from celestial ones, therefore we say that married
love is the fundamental love of all celestial and spiritual loves,
and so then of natural loves.Natural loves are connected with loves of self and the world.
Spiritual loves, on the other hand, are connected with love for
the neighbor, and celestial loves are connected with love toward
the Lord. And because loves have these connections, it is apparent
what sequence they follow and in what order they are present in a
person. When they are present in this order, then natural loves
draw their life from spiritual loves, and spiritual loves from
celestial ones, and all of them, in this order, from the Lord,
from whom they come.
-
- (6) Moreover, into this love have been
gathered all joys and all delights, from the first to the last of
them.-
- 68. [All joys and delights]
68. (6) Moreover, into this love have been gathered all joys
and all delights, from the first to the last of them. All the
delights a person feels, of whatever kind, have to do with his
love. Love reveals itself through delights; indeed, it exists and
lives through them.People know that delights rise and deepen in the degree that
love rises and deepens, and also as incidental affections touch
more closely the dominant love.Now because married love is the fundamental love of all good
loves, and because, as we showed above, it is engraved on even the
smallest aspects of a person, it follows that its delights surpass
the delights of all other loves, and also that it gives delight to
these other loves according as it is present and at the same time
united with them. For it swells the inmost feelings of the mind
and at the same time the inmost feelings of the body, as the
pleasurable stream of its fountain flows through and opens them.[2] All delights have been gathered into this love, from the
first to the last of them, because of the excellence of the use it
serves, surpassing that of all other loves. The use it serves is
the propagation of the human race and so of the angelic heaven.
And because this use or purpose was the ultimate goal in creation,
it follows that all blessings, felicities, delights,
gratifications and pleasures, which could ever have been conferred
on mankind by the Lord the Creator, have been gathered into this,
its accompanying love.It is apparent from the delights of the five senses – sight,
hearing, smell, taste and touch – that delights accompany the use
they serve and are delightful to a person in accordance with the
love he has for it. Each of these senses experiences delights,
with variations, according to the particular uses these senses
serve. Why not the sensation of married love, whose use or purpose
embraces those of all the other senses?
- 68. [All joys and delights]
- 69. [Few know the joy]
69. I know that few will accept that all joys and all delights,
from the first to the last of them, have been gathered into
married love, and this for the reason that true married love – the
love into which these joys and delights have been gathered – today
is so rare that people do not know what it is like, and scarcely
that it exists (to repeat what was explained and established
above, nos. 58, 59). For these
joys and delights do not occur in any other married love than
genuine married love. And because genuine married love on earth is
so rare, it is impossible to describe its supreme states of bliss
on the basis of anything other than the testimony of angels,
because angels experience it.Regarding its inmost delights – which are delights of the soul,
where the conjugal union between love and wisdom, or goodness and
truth, first flows in from the Lord – angels have said these
delights are imperceptible and therefore indescribable, because
they are at the same time delights of peace and innocence. But
they said, too, that these same delights, in their descent, become
more and more perceptible – as states of bliss in the higher
regions of their mind, as states of happiness in the lower regions
of their mind, and as consequent states of delight in their heart,
at which point they spread from the heart into each and every part
of the body, finally coming together in the last of these as the
delight of delights.In addition, angels have reported wonderful things about these
delights, saying also in regard to the varieties of these delights
in the souls of married partners and as they descend from their
souls into their minds and from their minds into their hearts,
that these varieties are infinite, and also eternal. They have
said, too, that these delights rise and deepen according to the
wisdom in the husbands, and this because angels live to eternity
in the flower of their life, and nothing is more blessed to them
than to grow ever more wise.But more about these delights as reported from the testimony of
angels may be found in the narrative accounts, especially in some
of those which come at the end of some chapters later on.[*1]
-
- (7) But no others come into this love and no
others can be in it but those who go to the Lord and love the truths
of the church and do the good things it teaches.-
- 70. [No others come into this love]
70. (7) But no others come into that love and no others can be
in it but those who go to the Lord and love the truths of the
church and do the good things it teaches. No others come into this
love but those who go to the Lord, because monogamous marriages,
which are marriages of one man with one wife, correspond to the
marriage of the Lord and the church, and they have their origin
from the marriage between goodness and truth (as discussed above,
nos. 60-63).It follows from this origin and this correspondence that true
married love comes from the Lord and is found in people who go to
Him directly, but this cannot be established fully without
discussing these two secrets in some detail. This will be done in
the chapters that come next after this one, one of which will be
on the origin of married love from the marriage of good and
truth,[*1] and the other on the marriage of the Lord and the
church and correspondence to it.[*2] In those chapters we shall
also see that it follows from these considerations that the
married love in a person depends on the state of the church in
him.[*1] See nos. 83ff.
[*2] See nos. 116ff.
- 70. [No others come into this love]
-
- 71. [the Lord primarily regards the intention]
71. No others can be in a state of true married love but those
who receive it from the Lord – namely, those who go to Him
directly and live the life of the church from Him – for the reason
that this love, viewed in terms of its origin and correspondence,
is celestial, spiritual, holy, pure and clean, more than any other
love that is found in angels of heaven or people of the church (as
said above, no. 64). And these attributes of it
cannot exist except in people who are joined to the Lord and
brought by Him into association with angels of heaven.That is because people like this abstain from love affairs
outside of marriage, which are liaisons with others than their
rightful wife or husband, and they abstain from them as injuries
to the soul and as cesspools of hell. And in the degree that a
married person abstains from such liaisons, even as regards the
lusts of his will and his consequent intentions, in the same
degree married love is purified in him and becomes progressively
spiritual, first during his life on earth, and afterwards in
heaven.[2] No love can ever become pure in human beings, nor in
angels. So neither can this love. But because the Lord primarily
regards the intention that is in the will, therefore to the extent
that a person has the intention and perseveres in it, to that
extent he is introduced into the purity and holiness of this love,
and gradually makes progress in it.No others can be in a state of spiritual married love but those
who are in it from the Lord, because heaven is in that love. And
the natural man – for whom married love takes its pleasure solely
from the flesh – cannot draw near to heaven, nor to any angel.
Indeed, neither can he draw near to any person who possesses that
love, for that love is the fundamental love of all celestial and
spiritual loves (see above, nos. 65-67). [3] The
fact of this was attested for me by an experience I had. I saw
some evil spirits in the spiritual world who were being prepared
for hell, going towards an angel who was enjoying the company of
his wife. As they were approaching, while still at a distance,
they began to act like frenzied madmen, and they sought caverns
and pits as places of refuge and threw themselves into them.(One may conclude from the incidents related in the
Introduction, no. 10, that evil spirits like
whatever is of the same character as their affection, however
unclean it is, and that they dislike spirits of heaven, because
heaven is pure, which they avoid as something alien to them.)
- 71. [the Lord primarily regards the intention]
- 72. [True faith and good life]
72. Only those people come into true married love and only
those can be in it who love the truths of the church and do the
good things it teaches, for the reason that no others are accepted
by the Lord. That is because people who love the truths of the
church and do the good things it teaches are in a state of
conjunction with the Lord, and consequently they can be kept in
that love by Him.There are two things which form the church and so heaven in a
person: truth of faith and goodness of life. Truth of faith brings
the Lord’s presence, and goodness of life in accordance with
truths of faith brings conjunction with Him and thus forms the
church and heaven. Truth of faith brings presence because it has
to do with light, that being what spiritual light is. Goodness of
life brings conjunction because it has to do with warmth, that
being what spiritual warmth is; for spiritual warmth is love, and
goodness of life has to do with love. We also know that all light
– even wintry light – brings presence, and that warmth united with
light brings conjunction; for gardens and flower-beds become
visible in every kind of light, but they do not produce flowers
and fruit until warmth is combined with the light.The evident conclusion from this is that people are blessed
with true married love not if they only know the truths of the
church, but if they know them and do the good things it teaches.
-
- (8) This love was the greatest of loves among
the ancients who lived in the golden, silver and copper ages, but
after that it gradually disappeared.- 73. [This love has disappeared]
73. (8) This love was the greatest of loves among the ancients
who lived in the golden, silver and copper ages. It cannot be
known from historical sources that married love was the greatest
of loves among the ancient and most ancient peoples who lived in
those first ages referred to by these names. It cannot be known
from historical sources because their written records do not
remain, and the records that do exist come from writers who lived
after those times. It is, in fact, the later writers who give the
ages their names, and who also describe the purity and integrity
of the life of those earlier peoples, likewise its gradual
deterioration afterwards as being like the descent of gold to
iron.The last or iron age, however, which began at the time of those
writers, can be deduced to some extent from the records of the
lives of some of the kings, judges and wise men, who were called
sages, in Greece and elsewhere. But as it is foretold in Daniel,
that age would not hold together, as iron holds together by
itself, but it would become like iron mixed with clay, which does
not stick together (Daniel 2:43).[2] Now because the ages that were named after gold, silver,
and copper passed away before the dates of our written records,
and because knowledge of their marriages cannot, therefore, be
gained on earth, it pleased the Lord to show them to me by a
spiritual way, by conducting me to the heavens where they have
their dwellings, so that I might learn from them personally there
what marriages had been like among them when they lived in their
ages. For all people whatever, who, since creation, have departed
out of the natural world, are now in the spiritual world, and in
respect to their loves they are all the same as they were and so
remain to eternity.Since the things I learned are worth knowing and telling, and
because they confirm the holiness of marriages, I would like to
make them public as they were shown me in an awake state of the
spirit and afterwards recalled to remembrance by an angel and so
written down. Moreover, because they are from the spiritual world,
like the rest of the narratives at the ends of the expositional
chapters, I have chosen to divide them into six accounts,
presented according to the progressions of the ages.
- 73. [This love has disappeared]
- Married love among people who lived in the
golden age (no. 75).-
- 74. [The Five Ages]
74. These six accounts come from the spiritual world, on the
subject of married love, and they reveal what that love was like
in the first ages, and what it was like afterwards, and what it is
like today. It is apparent from them that that love gradually
moved away from its holiness and purity, until it became
licentious; but that there is still hope of its returning to its
pristine or ancient holiness.
- 74. [The Five Ages]
- 75. [The golden age]
75. The first account:
When I was once meditating on married love, my mind was seized
with a desire to know what that love was like among the people who
lived in the golden age, and afterwards what it was like among
those who lived in the following ages which are named after
silver, copper, and iron. And because I knew that all those people
who lived well in those ages are now in heaven, I prayed to the
Lord to be allowed to speak with them and be instructed.Then suddenly an angel stood beside me, and he said, “I
have been sent by the Lord to be your guide and companion. First I
will guide and accompany you to the people who lived in the first
age or period, which is called golden.” He also added, “The
way to them is difficult. It lies through a dark forest which no
one can pass through without being given a guide by the Lord.”[2] I was in the spirit, and so I readied myself for the
journey, and we turned our faces to the east. And as we went I saw
a mountain, whose height extended beyond the level of the clouds.We crossed a great desert, and we came to a forest thick with
trees of various kinds and dark on account of their density, as
the angel had predicted. However, the forest was intersected by
many narrow paths, but the angel said they were all winding ways
leading astray, and that, unless a traveler’s eyes were opened by
the Lord to see the olive trees covered with leafy vines and to
make his way from olive tree to olive tree, he would wander off
into infernal regions which surrounded the forest on each side.
“This is what this forest is like,” the angel said, “in
order to guard the approach, for none but the earliest people
dwell on that mountain.”[3] After we entered the forest, our eyes were opened, and here
and there we saw olive trees entwined with vines, which had
bunches of purplish-blue grapes hanging from them. Moreover, the
olive trees were arranged in a continuous series of circles.
Consequently we went around and around as each one came to view,
until finally we saw a grove of tall cedars, with some eagles on
their branches.Seeing them the angel said, “We are now on the mountain,
not far from its summit.”We went on, and lo, beyond the grove, there was a circular
field, where male and female lambs were grazing, which were forms
representative of the state of innocence and peace of the people
who dwelt on the mountain. We crossed this field, and suddenly
tents appeared – tent after tent – reaching many thousands in
number, in front and on each side, as far as the eye could see.And the angel said, “We are now in an encampment. Behold
the army of the Lord Jehovih! That is what they call themselves
and their dwellings. When these most ancient people lived in the
world, they dwelled in tents. Therefore they also live in tents
now. But let us turn our way southward – where the wiser ones
among them are – to find someone to talk with.”[4] As we went, I saw in the distance three boys and three
girls sitting at the entrance of one of the tents. But when we
drew near, they looked like men and women of average height.And the angel said, “All the inhabitants of this mountain
appear at a distance like little children, because they are in a
state of innocence, and early childhood is the way innocence
appears.”Seeing us, the men hurried over to us and said, “Where are
you from, and how did you get here? Your faces are different from
the faces of our mountain.”But the angel answered and told them how we were able to pass
through the forest and the reason for our coming.Hearing this, one of the three men invited us into his tent and
led us inside. The man was dressed in a blue-colored robe and a
tunic of very white wool. And his wife was dressed in a purple
dress, with a blouse 5underneath of embroidered fine linen. [5]
Then because I had in my thought the desire to learn about the
marriages of the most ancient peoples, I looked by turns at the
husband and wife, and I observed a seeming unity of their souls in
their faces.So I said, “You two are one.”
The man replied, “We are. Her life is in me, and my life
is in her. We have two bodies, but one soul. The union between us
is like the union of the two tabernacles in the breast which are
called the heart and the lungs. She is my heart and I am her
lungs. But since when we say heart here we mean love, and when we
say lungs we mean wisdom, therefore she is the love of my wisdom,
and I am the wisdom of her love. Therefore her love outwardly
clothes my wisdom, and my wisdom is inwardly within her love.
Consequently, as you have said, the unity of our souls appears in
our faces.”[6] Then I asked, “If such is the union between you, are
you able to look upon any other woman than your own?”He replied, “I can, but because my wife is united to my
soul, the two of us look together, and then not a trace of lust
can enter. For when I look at other men’s wives, I look at them
through the eyes of my wife, who is the only one I am in love
with. And because she, as my wife, can perceive all my
inclinations, she acts as an intermediary and directs my thoughts,
taking away anything discordant and at the same time inspiring a
coldness and horror towards anything unchaste. As a result it is
impossible for us here to regard any of our companions’ wives with
lust – as impossible as it would be to look at the light of our
heaven from a state of infernal darkness. We have no mental
concept among us, therefore, and not even any word in our speech
for the temptations of libidinous love.” He could not say
free love, because the chastity of their heaven resisted it.My angel guide then said to me, “You hear, now, the speech
of the angels of this heaven, that it is a speech of wisdom,
because they speak in terms of causes.”[7] After this I looked around, and seeing that their tent
appeared covered with gold, I asked why this was.The man replied that it was due to the flaming light, which
glittered like gold. “It shines and strikes the curtains of
our tent,” he said, “whenever we are engaged in
conversation on the subject of married love. For the heat from our
sun, which in its essence is love, then bares itself and tints the
light, which in its essence is wisdom. It tints it with its own
color, which is golden. This occurs because married love in its
origin is the interplay of wisdom and love, for man was born to be
a form of wisdom, and woman to be a form of love for the wisdom in
a man. From this come the delights of that interplay in married
love, and therefore between us and our wives.“We here have seen, for thousands of years, that those
delights become more excellent and exalted in abundance, degree
and strength, according to the worship of the Lord Jehovih among
us. That heavenly union or that heavenly marriage which exists
between love and wisdom infuses itself as a result of that
worship.”[8] When he said this, I saw a great light on a hill at the
center amid the tents, and I asked where that light was coming
from.The man said, “It is coming from the sanctuary of our
tabernacle of worship.”I then inquired whether we might go there, and he said we
could. So I went, and I saw a tabernacle which, outside and in,
exactly fit the description of the tabernacle which was built for
the children of Israel in the wilderness, whose form was shown to
Moses on top of Mount Sinai (Exodus 25:40, 26:30). And I asked
what there was inside the sanctuary that was giving off so much
light.He answered, “There is a tablet, which bears the
inscription, “The Covenant Between Jehovah and Heaven.””
That was all he said.[9] Then, because by that time we were getting ready to leave,
I asked, “When you lived in the natural world, did any of you
live with more than one wife?”He replied that he did not know one person who did. “For
we could not think of having more,” he said. “Those who
had had such thoughts told us that their states of heavenly bliss
instantly receded from the inmost depths of their souls to the
outmost parts of their bodies, even into their fingernails, and
along with them the virtues of manhood. When others perceived
this, they were exiled from our lands.”Having said this, the man hurried to his tent and returned with
a pomegranate containing a number of seeds made of gold. He gave
it to me and I took it away with me, as a memento to me that we
had been with people who had lived in the golden age.So then, after saying farewell, we departed and returned home.
-
- Among people who lived in the silver age (no.
76).- 76. [the silver age]
76. The second account:
The next day the same angel came to me and said, “Would
you like me to take and accompany you to the peoples who lived in
the silver age or period, so that we may hear from them about the
marriages of their time?” He also said that these people,
too, could not be approached except under the Lord’s guidance.I was in the spirit as before, and I went with my guide. And we
came first to a hill in the border region between the east and the
south. Then, as we stood upon its slope, he showed me a far
extended stretch of land, and we saw in the distance an elevation
like that of a mountain. Between it and the hill on which we stood
was a valley, and beyond that a level area, and after that a
gently rising incline.We descended from the hill to cross the valley, and here and
there on each side we saw blocks of wood and stone carved into the
shapes of people and various kinds of animals, birds and fish. So
I asked the angel, “What are these? Are they idols?”And he answered, “Not at all. They are figures
representative of various moral virtues and spiritual truths.
Among the peoples of this age there was a knowledge of
correspondences. Since every person, animal, bird and fish
corresponds to some quality, therefore each carving represents
some aspect of a virtue or truth, and a group of them taken
together represents the whole virtue or truth in a general,
extended form. They are what in Egypt were called hieroglyphics.”[2] We continued through the valley, and as we entered the
level area, suddenly we saw horses and chariots – horses with
variously decorated harnesses and halters, and chariots variously
shaped, some carved out like eagles, some like whales, and some
like stags with horns, or like unicorns. At the end we also saw
some wagons, and stables around at the sides. But when we drew
near, both the horses and the chariots disappeared, and instead of
them we saw people in couples and pairs, walking, talking and
reasoning together.The angel then said to me, “The various horses, chariots
and stables – as they seem at a distance – are appearances
expressive of the rational intelligence of the people of this age.
For by correspondence a horse symbolizes an understanding of
truth; a chariot, its accompanying doctrine; and stables, sources
of instruction. You know that in this world, all things take on
appearances according to correspondences.”[3] We went on by these things, however, and we ascended by a
long incline, until at last we saw a city, which we entered. As we
wandered through it, from the streets and public squares we
observed its houses. They were all palaces, built out of marble.
In front they had steps of alabaster, with columns of jasper on
each side of the steps. We also saw temples made of precious stone
the color of sapphire and lapis lazuli.The angel said to me, “They have houses made of different
kinds of stone because stones symbolize natural truths, and
precious stones symbolize spiritual truths. The people who lived
in the silver age all had their intelligence from spiritual truths
and so from natural truths. Silver also has a similar symbolism.”[4] As we surveyed the city, we saw married couples here and
there in pairs; and since they were husbands and wives, we waited
to see if we would be invited in somewhere. Even as we had this in
mind, moreover, as we were passing by, two of them called us back
into their house. So we went up the steps and went in. Then,
speaking with them on my behalf, the angel explained the reason
for our coming to that heaven, saying that we had come to be
instructed concerning marriages among ancient peoples – “you
here being some of them,” he said.They then replied, “We come from peoples in Asia, and the
focus of our age was the pursuit of truths, by which we acquired
intelligence. This pursuit was the focus of our soul and mind. But
the focus of our physical senses was on representations of truths
in forms, and a study of correspondences combined the sensory
interests of our bodies with the perceptions of our minds, gaining
for us intelligence.”[5] Hearing this, the angel asked them to tell us something
about marriages among them.So the husband said, “There is a correspondence between
the spiritual marriage, which is a marriage of truth with good,
and natural marriage, which is the marriage of a man with one
wife. And because we have studied correspondences, we see that the
church with its truths and goods can by no means exist except in
people who live with one wife in a state of true married love. For
a marriage of good and truth in a person is the church in him.“Consequently, we who are here all say that a husband is a
form of truth, and his wife a form of good, and that good cannot
love any other truth than its own truth, nor can truth love any
other good in return than its own good. If it were to love
another, the inner marriage that forms the church would die, and
the marriage would become merely external – the kind of marriage
that idolatry corresponds to, not the church. Therefore we call
marriage with one wife a sacred union, but if it were contracted
with more than one among us, we would call it a sacrilege.”[6] Saying this, he showed us into an anteroom outside the
bedroom, which had a number of works of art on the walls and
little images apparently cast out of silver. I then asked what
they were.They said, “They are pictures and forms representing the
many qualities, attributes and delights which have to do with
married love. These ones here represent the unity of souls; these
other ones, the conjunction of minds; the ones there, the harmony
of hearts; those over there, the delights arising as a result.”While we were looking, we saw on the wall a kind of rainbow,
consisting of three colors, purple, blue, and bright white. And we
saw how the purple color passed through the blue and tinted the
white with a purplish blue hue, and that the latter color flowed
back through the blue into the purple and raised it into a kind of
flaming radiance.[7] Then the husband said to me, “Do you understand it?”
And I said, “Instruct me.”
So he said, “The purple by its correspondence symbolizes
the married love of the wife; the bright white, the intelligence
of the husband; the blue, the beginning of married love in the
husband’s perception from the wife; and the purplish blue, which
tinted the white, married love then in the husband. This latter
color’s flowing back through the blue into the purple and raising
it into a kind of flaming radiance symbolizes the married love of
the husband flowing back to the wife. Things like these are
represented on these walls whenever we reflect on married love,
its mutual, progressive and simultaneous union, and then look
closely at the rainbows exhibited there.”At this I said, “Things like this today are more than
mysteries, for they are of a representational type, representing
the secrets of the married love of one man with one wife.”He replied, “So they are, but to us here they are not
secrets, and therefore not mysteries.”[8] When he said this, a chariot appeared in the distance drawn
by white ponies, and seeing it, the angel said, “That chariot
is a signal for us to depart.”Then as we were going down the steps, our host gave us a
cluster of white grapes with leaves from the vine still attached,
and suddenly the leaves turned silver. And we took them away with
us as a memento that we had spoken with people of the silver age.
- 76. [the silver age]
- Among people who lived in the copper age (no.
77).- 77. [the copper age]
77. The third account:
The next day my angel guide and companion came again and said,
“Prepare yourself, and let us go to the inhabitants of heaven
in the west, who are some of the people who lived in the third
period or copper age. The places where they live stretch from the
south across the west towards the north, but not extending into
the north.”So, having prepared myself, I accompanied him, and entering
their heaven from the south side, we found there a magnificent
grove of palm trees and laurels. We passed through it, and then on
its western border we saw giants twice the height of ordinary
people.They interrogated us. “Who let you in through the grove?”
The angel said, “The God of heaven.”
And they replied, “We are guards to the ancient western
heaven. But go ahead and pass.”[2] So we passed, and from a watch-tower we saw a mountain
rising to the clouds, and between us in the tower and that
mountain we saw villages after villages, with gardens, groves and
fields in between. We then passed through the villages to the
mountain and ascended. And lo, at its summit was not a peak but a
plateau, and on it a city widely extended and spread out. All of
its houses, moreover, were made out of wood from resinous trees,
and their roofs out of wooden planks.I asked, “Why are the houses here made of wood?”
The angel answered, “Because wood symbolizes natural
goodness, and the people of the third age on the earth were in
this state of goodness. And because copper also symbolizes natural
goodness, therefore the age in which they lived was named after
copper by people of earlier times.“There are also sacred halls here, built out of boards of
olive wood, and in the middle of them is a sanctuary, containing
in an ark the Word given to the inhabitants of Asia before the
Word which the Israelites had. Its narrative books are called the
Wars of Jehovah, and the prophetical books, Oracles, both referred
to by Moses (Numbers 21:14,15,27-30).“In the kingdoms of Asia it has now been lost, and it is
preserved only in Great Tartary.”The angel then led me to one of the buildings, and looking in,
we saw in the middle of it the sanctuary, all bathed in a
brilliant white light. And the angel said: “The light comes
from that ancient Asiatic Word, for all Divine truth shines with
light in heaven.”[3] As we were going out of the building, we heard it had been
reported in the city that two strangers were about, and that they
were to be investigated to find out where they came from and what
their business was here. Moreover, an attendant came running from
the court and ordered us to appear for a hearing.When we were then asked where we came from and what our
business was here, we replied, “We passed through a grove of
palm trees and then through the abodes of giants, the ones who
guard your heaven, and afterwards through a stretch of villages.
You may conclude from this that we have come here, not of
ourselves, but thanks to the God of heaven. As for our business,
the reason for our coming, it is to be instructed regarding your
marriages, to find out whether they are monogamous or perhaps
polygamous.”They replied, “What are polygamous marriages? Are they not
forms of licentiousness?”[4] Then the panel of magistrates there selected someone
intelligent to instruct us in his own home about this matter. And
when we arrived at his house, he called his wife to his side and
said the following:“The earliest or most ancient people were in a state of
true married love, and they therefore experienced the strength and
power of that love, more than any other peoples in the world. They
are now in a most blissful state in their heaven, which is in the
east. We have precepts from them regarding marriage which we have
preserved among us. We are their descendants, and they have handed
down rules of life to us, like fathers to sons, and the rules
which have to do with marriage include this maxim:Children, if you wish to love God and the neighbor, and if you
wish to be wise and be happy to eternity, we advise you to live
monogamously. If you depart from this precept, all heavenly love
will escape you, and with it inward wisdom, and you will become
outcasts.“We have obeyed, like children, this precept of our
fathers, and we have perceived the truth in it. The truth we
perceived is that a person becomes heavenly and internal to the
extent that he loves his married partner only, and that a person
becomes natural and external to the extent that he does not love
his married partner only. In the latter case, he loves no one but
himself and the imaginations of his own mind, and he is foolish
and stupid.[5] “This is why all of us in our heaven are monogamous.
And because we are, therefore all the boundaries of our heaven are
guarded to keep out polygamists, adulterers and licentious people.
If polygamists get in, they are cast out into the darkness of the
north. If adulterers get in, they are cast out into the fires of
the west. And if licentious people get in, they are cast out into
the illusory lights of the south.”Hearing this I asked what he meant by the darkness of the
north, the fires of the west, and the illusory lights of the
south.He answered that the darkness of the north was dullness of mind
and ignorance of truths; that the fires of the west were loves of
evil; and that the illusory lights of the south were
falsifications of truth. “These last,” he said, “are
forms of spiritual licentiousness.”[6] After this he said, “Follow me to our treasure house.”
So we followed, and he showed us some written documents of very
ancient peoples, telling us that they wrote on wooden and stone
tablets and afterwards on polished sheets of wood assembled into
books, and that people of the second age wrote their records on
parchments of animal skin. Then he brought out a parchment
containing maxims of the earliest peoples transcribed from their
stone tablets, including also the precept regarding marriage.[7] When we had seen these records and others from very early
antiquity, the angel said, “It is now time for us to go.”Then our host went out into the garden and took some sprigs
from a tree, and, tying them into a bundle, he presented them,
saying, “These sprigs come from a tree native or peculiar to
our heaven, whose sap has the fragrance of balsam.”We took away this bundle of sprigs with us and descended by a
way, over to the east, which was not guarded. And behold, the
sprigs turned into shiny bronze and their very tips into gold, as
a memento that we had been among a people of the third age, which
is named after copper or bronze.
- 77. [the copper age]
- Among people who lived in the iron age (no.
78).- 78. [the iron age]
78. The fourth account:
Two days later the angel spoke with me again, saying, “Let
us complete the course of the ages. The last age remains, which is
named after iron. The people of this age live in the north, on the
western side, extending inward or in a latitudinal direction
towards the interior. They all come from early inhabitants of Asia
who had the Ancient Word and who worshiped according to it.
Consequently they lived before the advent of our Lord into the
world. This is apparent from the writings of ancient authors in
which those times are given these names. The same ages are meant
by the statue seen by Nebuchadnezzar, whose head was of gold, its
breast and arms of silver, its belly and thighs of bronze, its
legs of iron, and its feet of iron and also clay (Daniel
2:32,33).”[2] The angel told me this on the way, which was shortened and
speeded along by the changes of state produced in our minds
according to the character of the inhabitants through whom we
passed. For intervals of space, and therefore distances, in the
spiritual world are appearances in accordance with states of mind.When we lifted our eyes, behold, we were in a forest consisting
of beech trees, horse chestnuts and oaks. And when we looked
around, we caught sight of bears there to the left and leopards to
the right.When I wondered at this, the angel said, “They are not
really bears or leopards, but people who guard these inhabitants
of the north. With their noses they sniff the atmospheres of life
emanating from passers-by, and rush upon all who are spiritual,
because the inhabitants are natural. People who only read the Word
and take nothing of doctrine from it, at a distance look like
bears. And people who confirm falsities from it look like
leopards.”But having seen us, they turned away and we passed on.
[3] After the forest we saw scrubland, and then grassy plains
divided into fields and surrounded by boxwood. After this the
ground sloped downward to a valley, in which there were cities,
one after another. We passed by several of them and entered into
one great one. Its streets were irregular. So, too, were its
houses. These were built out of bricks, with timbers in between,
and plastered.In the squares we found chapels made of cut limestone, with the
lower part of the buildings below ground level, and the upper part
above. We went down three steps into one of these, and around on
the walls we saw idols in various forms, and a lot of people on
their knees worshiping them. In the middle of them was a choir,
out of which the tutelary god of the city projected so that his
head could be seen.As we were leaving, the angel said to me that among the ancient
peoples who lived in the silver age (spoken of above), these idols
were images representative of spiritual truths and moral virtues.
And that when a knowledge of correspondences faded from memory and
became extinct, these images became first objects of worship and
afterwards were adored as deities. This was the origin of
idolatries.[4] When we were outside the chapel, we observed the people and
their dress. They had steel-like faces, gray-colored, and they
were dressed like clowns, with skirts around their hips and thighs
hanging down from a shirt tied at the chest. And on their heads
they had the cocked hats of sailors.“But enough of this,” the angel said. “We are
here to be instructed about the marriages of the people of this
age.”So we entered into the house of an important person, who had on
his head a turreted headdress. He received us kindly and said,
“Come in, and let us have a conversation together.”We went into the entrance hall and sat down there. Then I asked
him about the marriages in this city and general area.He said, “We do not live with one wife, but some people
have two or three wives, and some more. That is because the
variety, submissiveness, and honor entertain us, as though we were
kings. These are the things we have from our wives when there is
more than one. With only one wife we would not have the pleasure
of variety but boredom resulting from sameness. We would not have
the deference of submission but the irritation of equality. Nor
would we have the bliss of ruling with its accompanying honor, but
the annoyance of struggling for superiority.“After all, what is a woman? Is she not born subject to a
man’s will, and born to serve and not to rule? For this reason
every man here in his own house is like a royal majesty. Because
this is what we like, it is also the blessing of our life.”[5] But I asked, “Where, then, is married love, which
forms two souls into one? And joins minds together and blesses a
person? This love cannot be a divided love. If it is, it becomes a
passion which evaporates and passes away.”To this he replied, “I do not understand what you are
saying. What else blesses a person but the rivalry of wives for
the honor of being first with her husband?”Saying this, the man went into his harem and opened its double
doors. But a libidinous odor came out of it which stank like a
cesspool. This was the result of polygamous love, which is
matrimonial and at the same time licentious. I got up, therefore,
and closed the doors.[6] Afterwards I said, “How can you remain in this land,
when none of you have true married love, and when you also worship
idols?”He replied, “With respect to marital love, we are so
violently jealous of our wives that we do not allow anyone to
enter our houses past the entrance halls. And where there is
jealousy there is also love.“As for the idols, we do not worship them, but we cannot
think about the God of the universe except through images
presented to our eyes. For we cannot raise our thoughts above the
sense impressions of the body, nor can we raise our thoughts about
God above the visible things we can see.”Then again I asked, “Do your idols not have various forms?
How can they present a vision of one God?”To this he replied, “It is a mystery to us. Something
having to do with the worship of God lies hidden in every form.”So I said, “You are merely sensual, carnal people. You do
not have any love for God, nor any love for a married partner that
derives anything from spiritual love. And it is these loves that
together shape a human being, and from being sensual make him
heavenly.”[7] When I said this, I saw through the doorway what seemed to
be a flash of lightning. And I asked, “What is this?”He said, “Lightning like this is a signal to us that the
ancient one of the east is coming, who teaches us about God – that
He is one, alone the Almighty, who is the First and the Last. He
also warns us not to worship the idols, but only to look on them
as images representing virtues that emanate from the one God,
which together form a worship of Him. This ancient one is our
angel, whom we respect and listen to. He comes to us and raises us
up whenever we fall into a hazy worship of God owing to some
delusion regarding the images.”[8] Having heard this, we departed from the house and from the
city, and on the way, from the things we had seen in heaven, we
formed conclusions regarding the course and progress of married
love. With respect to its course, we observed that it had moved in
a circle from the east to the south, from there to the west, and
from there into the north. With respect to its progress, we saw
that it had declined as it went – in other words, that it had been
celestial in the east, spiritual in the south, natural in the
west, and sensual in the north. We also noted as well that it had
declined in the same measure that the love and worship of God
declined.Consequently we formed this conclusion, that married love in
the first age was like gold, in the second age like silver, in the
third age like bronze, and in the fourth age like iron, and that
at last it ceased to exist.But afterwards my angel guide and companion said,
“Nevertheless, I am sustained by the hope that the God of
heaven, who is the Lord, will revive this love, because it is
possible for it to be revived.”
- 78. [the iron age]
- Among peoples who lived after those ages
(nos. 79, 80).- 79. [after those ages]
79. The fifth account:
The same angel as before, who had been my guide and companion
to the ancient peoples who had lived in the four ages called
golden, silver, copper and iron – the same angel appeared again
and said to me, “You would like to see the age that followed
those ancient ages, to find out what it was like, and what it is
still like today. Follow me, then, and you will see. These are the
people of whom Daniel prophesied when he said:(A kingdom will arise after those other four, in which iron
will be mixed with miry clay.) They will mingle together through
the seed of man, but they will not adhere to one another, just as
iron does not mix with clay. (Daniel 2:41-43)”The angel added, “The seed of man, through which iron will
be mingled with clay, and yet without their adhering together –
this seed means the truth of the Word falsified.”[2] After these words I followed him, and on the way he told me
this. “They live,” he said, “in the border region
between the south and the west, but at a great distance beyond
those who lived in the previous four ages, and also deeper down.”So we continued through the south to a region bordering on the
west, and we passed through a dreadful forest. For we found pools
of water there from which crocodiles raised their heads, gaping at
us with jaws open wide and showing their teeth. And between the
pools we saw horrible dogs, some of them with three heads like
Cerberus, some of them with two heads, all of them with hideous
mouths and watching us with savage eyes as we passed by. Entering
the western part of this area, we also saw dragons and leopards,
like the ones described in the book of Revelation, chapters 12:3
and 13:2.[3] Then the angel said to me, “All these wild beasts you
have seen are not beasts but correspondent and thus representative
forms of the lusts that motivate the inhabitants we are going to
visit. Those hideous dogs represent the lusts themselves; the
crocodiles, their deceits and deceptions; the dragons and
leopards, their falsities and corrupt feelings towards things that
have to do with worship.“The inhabitants thus represented, however, do not live
just the other side of the forest, but beyond a great desert that
lies between, to keep them completely away and separate from the
inhabitants of the preceding ages. Moreover, they are altogether
alien – totally different from those other people. Indeed, they
have heads above their breasts, breasts above their loins, and
loins above their feet, like the earliest people. But there is not
a bit of gold in their heads, or of silver in their breasts, or of
bronze in their loins. In fact, there is not a bit of just plain
iron in their feet. Instead, they have iron mixed with clay in
their heads, both of these mixed with bronze in their breasts,
both of these also mixed with silver in their loins, and these
mixed with gold in their feet.“By this inversion they have been transformed from human
beings into caricatures of human beings, in which nothing inwardly
holds together. For what had been uppermost has become lowermost,
so that what was the head has become the heel, and vice versa.
Viewed from heaven, they look to us like play-actors who turn
their bodies upside down, support themselves on their elbows and
thus move about. Or they look like animals that lie upside down on
their backs, raise their feet in the air, and, digging their heads
into the ground, from that position look up at the sky.”[4] We passed through the forest and proceeded into the desert,
which was no less horrible. It consisted of piles of rocks, with
pits in between, out of which crept poisonous snakes and vipers
and from which flew fiery serpents.This whole desert kept sloping downward, and we descended by a
long decline, until at last we came to a valley inhabited by the
people of that region and age. We saw huts here and there, which
finally appeared to come together and be joined into the form of a
city.We went into the city, and behold, the houses were constructed
out of charred tree branches mortared together with clay. The
roofs were made of black tiles. The streets were irregular, all
narrow at first, but widening as they went, becoming finally quite
broad and terminating in squares. Consequently there were as many
squares as there were streets.Darkness fell as we entered the city, because the sky was not
visible. We looked up, therefore, and we were given light by which
to see.I then asked the people I encountered, “Can you see, since
the sky does not appear above you?”And they replied, “What sort of question is this? We see
clearly. We walk in full light.”Hearing this the angel said to me, “Darkness to them is
light, and light to them is darkness, as it is for nocturnal
birds. For they look downwards instead of upwards.”[5] We went into some of the shacks here and there, and in each
we saw a man with his woman. And we asked whether all of them here
lived each in his own house with only one wife.But they replied to this with a hiss, “What do you mean,
with only one wife? Why not ask whether we live with only one
harlot? What is a wife but a harlot?“According to our laws we are not allowed to commit
whoredom with more than just one woman, but still it is not
dishonorable or shameful for us to do so with more than one,
provided we do it away from the house. We boast about it with each
other! In this way we enjoy license and its pleasure more than
polygamists do.“Why is having more than one wife denied to us, when it
has been permitted in the past and is permitted today in the whole
world around us? What is life with just one woman but captivity
and imprisonment?“But here we break open the bar of this prison and so
rescue ourselves from slavery and set ourselves free. Who is angry
with a prisoner if he liberates himself when he can?”[6] To this we replied, “You speak, my friend, like one
devoid of religion. What person endowed with any power of reason
does not know that adulterous affairs are profane and hellish, and
that marriages are sacred and heavenly? Are not adulterous
relationships found among devils in hell, and marriages among
angels in heaven? Have you not read the sixth commandment in the
Decalogue? And in Paul, that adulterers can by no means come into
heaven?[*1]”At this our host laughed heartily, and he looked on me as a
simpleton – almost, even, as insane.But at that very moment a messenger came running from the
headman of the city and said, “Bring the two strangers to the
city square, and if they will not come voluntarily, drag them
there! We saw them under the dark cover of daylight. They have
come here in secret. They are spies!”The angel then said to me, “The reason we seemed to be
under dark cover is that we were in the light of heaven, and the
light of heaven to them is darkness, while the darkness of hell to
them is light. This is because they regard nothing as sinful, not
even adultery, and consequently they see falsity altogether as
truth. Falsity shines with light in hell, in the eyes of satanic
spirits, while truth darkens their eyes like the gloom of night.”[7] Then we said to the messenger, “We will not be forced,
still less dragged to the city square, but we will go with you
voluntarily.”So we went, and behold, we found a great crowd there. From it
came some lawyers who whispered in our ear, “Take care that
you do not say anything against religion, against our form of
government, or contrary to good manners.”But we kept answering, “We will only speak in favor of
them and in accordance with them.”Then we asked, “What is your religion in regard to
marriage?”At this the crowd began to murmur, and they said, “What
concern do you have here with marriage? Marriages are marriages.”So we asked a second time, “What is your religion in
regard to licentious relationships?”At this the crowd began to murmur again, saying, “What
concern do you have here with licentious relationships? Illicit
affairs are illicit affairs. He who is without guilt, let him
throw the first stone.[*2]”So we asked a third time, “Does your religion teach
regarding marriages that they are sacred and heavenly, and
regarding adulterous affairs that they are profane and hellish?”In response to this many in the crowd guffawed, mocked, and
jeered, saying, “Ask our priests about matters of religion,
not us. We accept without comment whatever they say, since nothing
of religion falls within the ability of the understanding to
judge. Have you not heard that the understanding is devoid of
reason in the mysteries on which the whole of religion is based?“Besides, what do our actions have to do with religion? Is
it not the pious murmurings of the heart that makes souls blessed
– murmurings about expiation, satisfaction and imputation – and
not works?”[8] But then some of the so-called wise men of the city came
over and said, “Get away from here. The crowd is becoming
inflamed. There will be a riot in a minute. Let us talk about this
by ourselves. There is an alley behind the courthouse. Let us go
back there. Come with us.”So we followed. And then they asked us where we came from and
what our business was there.We said, “We have come to be instructed about marriage, to
find out whether or not marriages among you are sacred unions as
they were among the ancient peoples who lived in the golden,
silver and copper ages.”But they replied, “What do you mean, sacred unions? Are
they not deeds of the flesh and the night?”Then we began to answer, “Are they not also deeds of the
spirit? And what the flesh does impelled by the spirit, is that
not spiritual? Moreover, everything that the spirit does, it does
from a marriage of goodness and truth. Is it not this spiritual
marriage which enters into the natural marriage that exists
between husband and wife?”To this the so-called wise men replied, “You probe and
refine the matter too much. You leap over rational considerations
to spiritual ones. Who can begin there, then descend and thus form
a judgment about anything?” To which they added
sarcastically, “Perhaps you have the wings of an eagle and
can soar to the uppermost regions of the sky and look down on such
matters. But we cannot.”[9] So we then asked them to tell us, from the height or region
to which the ideas of their minds flew aloft, whether they knew or
were able to know that such a thing exists as the married love of
one man with one wife, into which have been gathered all the
blessings, felicities, delights, gratifications and pleasures of
heaven. Moreover, that this love comes from the Lord according to
people’s reception of goodness and truth from Him, thus according
to the state of the church.[10] Hearing this they turned away and said, “These men
are crazy. They go into outer space with their rational faculties,
form empty conjectures and shower us with nutty speculations.”Afterwards they turned around to us and said, “We will
give a straight answer to your airy conjectures and dreams.”Then they said, “What does married love have in common
with religion and with being inspired by God?“Does that love not exist in everyone according to the
condition of his sexual powers? Is it not found among people who
are outside the church as well as among people who are in the
church? Among gentiles as well as among Christians? In fact, among
impious people as well as among pious ones?“Does the vigor of that love in everyone not come either
from heredity, or from good health, or from temperance of life, or
from the warmth of the climate? And can it not also be
strengthened and stimulated by drugs?“Is the same love not found in animals, especially in
birds which mate in pairs? Is that love not a matter of the flesh?
What does a matter of the flesh have to do with the spiritual
state of the church?“Does that love with a wife in its ultimate expression
differ one bit from love with a harlot in its ultimate expression?
Is the lust not the same, and the delight the same?“It is harmful, therefore, to trace the origin of married
love from the sacred things of the church.”[11] When we heard this we said to them, “You are
reasoning from the heat of lasciviousness and not from married
love. You do not know at all what married love is because among
you that love is cold. We are convinced by what you have said that
you come from the age that is named after and consists of iron and
clay, which do not cohere, according to the prophecy in Daniel
2:43. For you make married love and licentious love the same
thing. Can these two cohere any more than iron and clay? People
believe you are wise and call you wise, yet you are anything but
wise!”Inflamed with anger at these words, they began to cry out and
call the crowd to throw us out. But then, by a power given us by
the Lord, we stretched out our hands, and suddenly fiery serpents,
vipers and poisonous snakes came from the desert, and dragons,
too, and they invaded and filled the city, so that the inhabitants
became frightened and fled away.And the angel said to me, “New people keep coming from
earth to this region every day, and the previous inhabitants are
by turns removed and cast down into chasms in the west, which at a
distance look like lakes of fire and brimstone. The people there
are all adulterers, both spiritually and naturally.”[*1] See 1 Corinthians 6:9.
[*2] Cf. John 8:7.
- 79. [after those ages]
- A glorification of the Lord by angels in the
heavens on account of His advent, and celebrating then married love
(no. 81).-
- 80. [End times]
80. The sixth account:
When the angel said this, I looked over at the western horizon,
and behold, I saw what appeared to be lakes of fire and brimstone.
So I asked the angel why the hells there had this appearance.He replied, “They appear as lakes on account of the
falsifications of truth there, because water spiritually
interpreted is truth. What looks like fire appears around them and
in them as a result of their love of evil; and what looks like
brimstone, because of their love of falsity. These three
appearances – lake, fire and brimstone – so appear because they
correspond to the evil loves which motivate the people.“The people there are all shut up in eternal workhouses,
and they labor in exchange for food, clothing and a bed. And
whenever they do evil, they are severely and miserably punished.”[2] Again I asked the angel, “Why did you say that the
people there are adulterers both spiritually and naturally? Why
not say that they are evildoers and irreligious?”“Because,” he replied, “all people who regard
adulterous affairs as nothing, that is, who believe they are not
sins and who commit them deliberately and so purposefully, at
heart are evildoers and irreligious. For the human inclination
towards marriage goes hand in hand with religion at every step.
Every little step and every stride away from religion or towards
religion is also a step or stride away from or towards the marital
inclination that is peculiar and proper to a Christian person.”At my asking what that marital inclination was, he said, “It
is a wish to live with only one wife, and a Christian person has
this wish to the extent that he has religion.”[3] I afterwards grieved in spirit that marriage – which in
ancient times was so sacred – had so wantonly been transformed
into adulterous relationships.And the angel said, “It is the same with religion today.
For the Lord says that at the end of the age there will be the
abomination of desolation foretold by Daniel,[*1] and that “there
will be great tribulation, such as has not been since the
beginning of the world” (Matthew 24:15,21).“The abomination of desolation symbolizes the
falsification and loss of all truth. Tribulation symbolizes the
state of the church infested by evils and falsities. And the end
of the age, of which these things are said, symbolizes the final
period or end of the church.“The end has now come, because no truth remains that has
not been falsified, and falsification of truth is spiritual
licentiousness, which allies itself with natural licentiousness,
because they go together.”[*1] See Daniel 9:27, 11:31, 12:11.
- 80. [End times]
-
- 81. [Celebration]
81. While we were talking in sorrow about these things,
suddenly a burst of light shone about us, dazzling my eyes. I
looked up, therefore, and behold, the whole sky above us appeared
lit up, and we heard a glorification echoing across it in long
succession from the east to the west.Then the angel said to me, “The glorification you hear is
a glorification of the Lord on account of His Advent, and it is
coming from angels of the eastern and western heavens.” (From
the southern and northern heavens we heard only a polite murmur.)Moreover, since he understood it all, the angel told me, first,
that glorifications and celebrations of the Lord are taken from
the Word, because then they come from the Lord, inasmuch as the
Lord is the Word, in the sense that He is the essential Divine
truth in the Word.Then the angel said, “Specifically now, they are
glorifying and celebrating the Lord with these words which were
spoken by the prophet Daniel:You saw iron mixed with miry clay; they will mingle together
through the seed of man, but they will not cohere…. But (in
those days) the God of heaven will make to rise a kingdom which
for ages shall not perish…; it shall crush and consume all these
kingdoms, while it shall stand for ages. (Daniel 2:43,44)”[2] After this I heard what seemed to be the sound of singing,
and deeper in the east I saw a burst of light more brilliant than
the first. And I asked the angel what they were glorifying there.The angel said that they were glorifying the Lord with these
words in Daniel:I was seeing in the visions of night, and behold, with the
clouds of heaven, was One like the Son of man…. And to Him was
given dominion…and a kingdom, and all peoples and
nations…shall worship Him. His dominion is the dominion of an
age, which shall not pass away, and His kingdom one which shall
not perish. (Daniel 7:13,14)In addition, the angel said, they are celebrating the Lord with
these phrases taken from the book of Revelation:To (Jesus Christ) be glory and might…. Behold, He is coming
with clouds…. (He is) the Alpha and the Omega, the Beginning and
the End, the First and the Last…, who is, who was, and who is to
come, the Almighty. I, John…heard…(this from the Son of Man
from out of) the midst of the seven lampstands…. (Revelation
1:5-7; 22:13; 1:8-13; taken also from Matthew 24:30,31)[3] I looked again into the eastern sky, and a light shone over
to the right, whose glow extended into the southern hemisphere.
Hearing as well a sweet sound, I asked the angel what aspect of
the Lord they were glorifying there.The angel said they were quoting these words in the book of
Revelation:I saw a new heaven and a new earth…. And I…saw the holy
city, New Jerusalem, coming down from God out of heaven, prepared
as a bride…for her husband…. And (an angel) talked with me and
said, “Come, I will show you the bride, the Lamb’s wife.”
And he carried me away in the spirit on to a great and high
mountain, and showed me the…city, the holy Jerusalem….
(Revelation 21:1,2,9,10)Also these words:
I, Jesus…am…the Bright and Morning Star. And the Spirit and
the bride shall say, “Come!”…. (And He said,) “I
also am coming quickly.” Amen. Even so, come, Lord Jesus!
(Revelation 22:16,17,20)[4] After these and other things, we heard a general
glorification echoing across the sky from the east to the west and
also from the south to the north, and I asked the angel, “What
is happening now?”He said they were quoting these verses from the Prophets:
Let all flesh know that I, Jehovah, am your Savior and your
Redeemer…. (Isaiah 49:26)Thus said Jehovah, the King of Israel, and his Redeemer,
Jehovah of Hosts: “I am the First and the Last, and beside Me
there is no God.” (Isaiah 44:6)It will be said in that day: “Behold, this is our God,
whom we have waited for to free us. This is Jehovah, whom we have
waited for.” (Isaiah 25:9)The voice of one crying in the wilderness, “Prepare the
way of Jehovah….” …Behold, the Lord Jehovih comes in
strength…. He will feed His flock like a shepherd. (Isaiah
40:3,10,11)Unto us a Child is born, unto us a Son is given…, whose name
shall be…Wonderful, Counselor, God, Hero, Father of Eternity,
Prince of Peace. (Isaiah 9:6)Behold, the days will come…, and I will raise to David a
righteous Branch, who shall reign, a King…. And this is His
name…: JEHOVAH OUR RIGHTEOUSNESS. (Jeremiah 23:5,6; 33:15,16)Jehovah of Hosts is His name, and your Redeemer, the Holy One
of Israel. He shall be called God of the whole earth. (Isaiah
54:5)In that day…Jehovah shall become King over all the earth. In
that day there will be one Jehovah and His name will be one.
(Zechariah 14:8,9)[5] When I heard these things and understood their meaning, as
a result my heart leapt, and I went home filled with joy. And
there, returning from the state of my spirit into a bodily state,
I wrote down what I had seen and heard. To which I now add this,
that following His Advent the Lord will revive married love, such
as it was among ancient peoples. For married love comes only from
the Lord, and it is found in people who are made spiritual by Him
through His Word.
- 81. [Celebration]
- 82. [New Church teachings in brief]
82. After this a man came rushing from the northern zone in a
rage, and looking at me with a threatening expression and speaking
in a heated tone, he said, “You are the one who is trying to
lead the world astray by establishing a New Church, which you take
to be meant by the New Jerusalem that will come down out of heaven
from God, and by teaching that people who embrace the doctrines of
this church will be blessed by the Lord with true married love,
whose delights and happiness you exalt to the sky! Is that not
something you just made up? Are you not just saying it as a snare
and inducement to get people to go along with your new ideas?“Tell me in short, however, what these New Church
doctrines are, and I will see whether they hang together or not.”So I replied, “The doctrines of the church that is meant
by the New Jerusalem are as follows:“1. There is one God, in whom is the Divine Trinity, and
that God is the Lord Jesus Christ.“2. Saving faith is to believe in Him.
“3. Evils must be abstained from because they are of the
devil and from the devil.“4. Good deeds must be done because they are of God and
from God.“5. These good deeds must be done by a person as though he
were doing them from himself, but he must believe that they are
from the Lord in him and by means of him.”[2] When he heard this, the man’s rage subsided for several
minutes. But after some consideration, he again looked at me with
a fierce expression, saying, “These five precepts – are they
doctrines of the faith and charity of the New Church?”And I answered, “Yes.”
Then he asked me gruffly, “How are you able to demonstrate
the first one, that there is one God, in whom is the Divine
Trinity, and that He is the Lord Jesus Christ?”“I demonstrate it,” I said, “in this way. Is God
not one and indivisible? Is there not a Trinity? If God is one and
indivisible, is He not one person? If He is one person, is the
Trinity not in that person?“That He is the Lord Jesus Christ I demonstrate by the
following points: Jesus Christ was conceived by God the Father
(Luke 1:34,35), so that in regard to His soul He was God. And
therefore, as He Himself says, the Father and He are one (John
10:30). He is in the Father and the Father in Him (John 14:10,11).
He who sees Him and knows Him, sees and knows the Father (John
14:7,9). No one sees and knows the Father but He who is in the
bosom of the Father (John 1:18). All things belonging to the
Father are His (John 3:35, 16:15). He is the way, the truth, and
the life, and no one comes to the Father except through Him (John
14:6), thus by Him, because the Father is in Him. And, according
to Paul, all the fullness of the Godhead dwells in Him bodily
(Colossians 2:9). And furthermore, He has authority over all flesh
(John 17:2), and He has all authority in heaven and on earth
(Matthew 28:18).“From all this it follows that He is God of heaven and
earth.”[3] The man then asked how I demonstrate the second precept,
that saving faith is to believe in Him.“I demonstrate it,” I said, “by these words of
the Lord:This is the will of the Father…, that everyone who…believes
in (the Son) may have everlasting life. (John 6:39,40)God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that
everyone who believes in Him should not perish but have
everlasting life. (John 3:16,15)He who believes in the Son has everlasting life; but he who
does not believe the Son shall not see life, but the wrath of God
abides on him. (John 3:36)”[4] After that he said, “Demonstrate as well the third
precept, and the ones that follow.”Then I replied, “What need is there to establish that
evils must be abstained from because they are of the devil and
from the devil, that good deeds must be done because they are of
God and from God, and that these good deeds must be done by a
person as though he were doing them from himself, but that he must
believe they are from the Lord in him and by means of him? The
Holy Scripture from beginning to end attests throughout that these
three precepts are true. What else does it teach in sum but to
abstain from evils and do good deeds, and to believe in the Lord
God?“And besides, there is not any religion without these
three precepts. Religion has to do with a way of life, does it
not? And what is that life but to abstain from evils and do good
deeds. How can a person do these things and believe in them unless
he does so as though he were doing them from himself?“If you dismiss these precepts from the church, therefore,
you dismiss the Holy Scripture from the church, and you also
dismiss religion. And if you dismiss these, the church is not a
church.”On hearing these things, the man withdrew and considered them.
But still he went away in annoyance.
-
-
- 83. THE ORIGIN OF MARRIED LOVE FROM THE
MARRIAGE BETWEEN GOOD AND TRUTH-
- 83. [THE MARRIAGE BETWEEN GOOD AND TRUTH]
The origins of married love are internal and external, there
being many internal origins, likewise many external ones. The
inmost or fundamental origin of them all, however, is one. This is
the marriage between good and truth, as we will show in the
following paragraphs.No one has traced the origin of this love from this source
before, because no one has seen that there is any union between
good and truth. No one has seen it, moreover, because goodness is
not visible to the sight of the understanding as truth is, and
therefore knowledge of it has remained hidden and eluded
investigation. Since goodness is consequently one of the unknowns
in life, no one has been able to discern any marriage between it
and truth.Indeed, to the natural sight of reason, good appears so far
removed from truth as to have no connection with it. The fact of
this can be seen from people’s remarks whenever they mention
goodness and truth. For instance, when they say, “This is
good,” they have no thought of truth. And when they say, “This
is true,” neither do they have any thought of good.As a result, many people today believe that truth is something
completely separate, likewise goodness. Many also believe as well
that a person is intelligent and wise and thus truly human
according to the truths that he thinks, speaks, writes, and
believes, and not at the same time according to his goodness.Nevertheless, we will now explain that good does not exist apart
from truth, nor truth apart from good, consequently that there is
an eternal marriage between them, and that this marriage is the
origin of married love. The explanation will be developed according
to the following outline:(1) Goodness and truth are universal in creation, and are
therefore in all created things, but they are present in their
created vessels according to each one’s form.(2) Good does not exist by itself, nor truth by itself, but they
are everywhere united.(3) There is good’s truth and from this truth’s good, or truth
resulting from good and good resulting from that truth, and
implanted in these two from creation is an inclination to join
together into one.(4) In members of the animal kingdom, good’s truth or truth
resulting from good is masculine, and truth’s consequent goodness
or good resulting from that truth is feminine.(5) From the marriage of good and truth flowing in from the Lord
comes love for the opposite sex and also married love.(6) A love for the opposite sex is a love of the external or
natural man, and is therefore common to every animal.(7) But married love is a love of the internal or spiritual man,
and is therefore peculiar to mankind.(8) Married love in a person lies within love for the opposite
sex, like a gem in its native rock.(9) A love for the opposite sex in a person is not the origin of
married love, but it is its first stage, being thus like any
external natural quality in which an internal spiritual one is
implanted.(10) When married love has been implanted, love for the opposite
sex turns around and becomes a chaste love for the opposite sex.(11) Male and female were created to be the very image of the
marriage between good and truth.(12) They are an image of that marriage in their inmost
qualities and thus in their subsequent ones as the inner faculties
of their minds are opened.Explanation of these statements now follows.
- 83. [THE MARRIAGE BETWEEN GOOD AND TRUTH]
- (1) Goodness and truth are universal in
creation, and are therefore in all created things, but they are
present in their created vessels according to each one’s form.-
- 84. [Goodness and truth are universal]
84. (1) Goodness and truth are universal in creation, and are
therefore in all created things, but they are present in their
created vessels according to each one’s form. Goodness and truth
are universal in creation because they both exist in the Lord God
the Creator. Indeed, they are the Lord, for He is Divine good
itself and Divine truth itself.But this falls more clearly within the perception of the
understanding and so into some mental concept if instead of good
we say love, and if instead of truth we say wisdom. Let us say,
therefore, that in the Lord God the Creator there is Divine love
and Divine wisdom, and that these are the Lord, which is to say
that He is love itself and wisdom itself. For these two are the
same as good and truth. The reason is that good has to do with
love and truth with wisdom, for love is composed of goodness and
wisdom of truths.Since the two sets of terms amount to the same thing, in what
follows now we will sometimes use one, sometimes the other, and
both sets of terms have the same meaning. We say this at the
outset lest the understanding see a difference of meaning in the
following pages where these terms are used.
- 84. [Goodness and truth are universal]
-
- 85. [Every created thing has goodness and
truth from the Lord]85. So, then, since the Lord God the Creator is love itself and
wisdom itself, and the universe was created by Him, being in
consequence a work, so to speak, issuing from Him, it must be that
in each and every created thing there is some goodness and truth
from Him. For whatever is accomplished by and issues from anyone,
derives from him a character similar to his.Reason can also see that this is so from the order which each
and every thing in the universe was created in, in which one thing
exists for the sake of another, and in which one thing therefore
depends on another, like the links in a chain. For all things
exist for the sake of the human race, that from it may come the
angelic heaven by which creation returns to the Creator, its
source. From this comes the conjunction of the created universe
with its Creator, and by that conjunction its everlasting
preservation.That is why we say that goodness and truth are universal in
creation. The fact of this is evident to everyone who considers it
reasonably. In every created thing he sees something that relates
to good and something that relates to truth.
- 85. [Every created thing has goodness and
- 86. [Whatever flows into any vessel is
received by it according to its form]86. Goodness and truth are present in their created vessels
according to each one’s form because whatever flows into any
vessel is received by it according to its form. The preservation
of the whole is nothing but the constant flowing in of Divine
goodness and Divine truth into forms created by that influx –
continued existence or preservation being thus constant birth or
creation.The fact that whatever flows into any vessel is received by it
according to its form can be illustrated by various examples. It
may be illustrated, for instance, by the flowing in of heat and
light from the sun into species of plant life of every kind. Each
one of these receives that influx according to its form. Thus
every tree receives it according to its form, every bush according
to its form, every plant and every kind of grass according to its
form. That which flows in is the same in every case, but the way
it is received causes each species to remain the species it was,
because the reception is according to the form.The same point may also be illustrated by the influx into
animals of every kind, according to each one’s form.Even an simple peasant can see that whatever flows in is
received according to the form of the particular recipient if he
reflects on various kinds of wind instruments – pipes, flutes,
trumpets, horns, and pipe organs – and considers that from the
same breath or influx of air they each make a sound according to
their form.
-
- (2) Good does not exist by itself, nor truth
by itself, but they are everywhere united.- 87. [Good and truth are united]
87. (2) Good does not exist by itself, nor truth by itself, but
they are everywhere united. Anyone with any sense who tries to
form for himself an idea of goodness, finds he cannot do it
without adding something that expresses it and presents it to
view. Unless something is added, good is a nameless entity. That
which expresses it and presents it to view has to do with truth.Try saying just “good” without at the same time
mentioning some particular or other with which it is associated,
or define it abstractly, that is, without attaching any additional
idea, and you will see that it has no reality, but that it has
reality when something is added. If you focus the sight of reason
on it, moreover, you will perceive that without any added
qualification goodness has no assignable attribute and so no way
of being compared, no capacity for being affected, and no
character – in a word, no quality.It is the same with truth if it is referred to without a
subject. Educated reason can see that its subject has to do with
good.[2] Instances of goodness are beyond number, however, and each
one rises to its highest point and descends to its lowest point as
though along the degrees of a scale, changing its name, too, as it
varies in its progression and quality. Because of this it is
difficult for any but the wise to see the relationship of goodness
and truth to things and their union in them. Nevertheless, it is
evident from common sense that good does not exist apart from
truth, nor truth apart from good, as soon as it is accepted that
each and every thing in the universe relates to goodness and
truth, as we showed under the previous heading (nos. 84,
85).[3] That good does not exist by itself nor truth by itself may
be illustrated and at the same time attested by various
considerations. Take, for example, the following, that there is no
essence without a form, and no form without an essence. Good is
the essence or being, while truth is what gives form to the
essence and expression to the being.Again, in the human being we find will and intellect. Good has
to do with the will, and truth with the intellect. The will does
not accomplish anything by itself but through the intellect, nor
does the intellect accomplish anything by itself but from the
will.Or again, in the human being there are two sources of physical
life, the heart and the lungs. The heart is unable to produce any
conscious or active life without the breathing of the lungs, nor
are the lungs able to do so without the heart. The heart relates
to good, and the breathing of the lungs to truth. There is also a
correspondence between them.[4] Something similar exists in each and every part of the mind
and in each and every part of the body in the human being. We do
not have the space, however, to present further confirmations
here. See instead the same ideas more fully established in Angelic
Wisdom Regarding Divine Providence, nos. 3-26, where these points
are explained under the following series of headings:(1) The universe, together with every created thing in it,
comes from Divine love through Divine wisdom, or to say the same
thing, from Divine good through Divine truth.(2) Divine good and Divine truth emanate from the Lord as a
unity.(3) This unity exists in some sort of image in every created
thing.(4) Good is not good except to the extent that it is united
with truth, and truth is not truth except to the extent that it is
united with good.(5) The Lord does not permit anything to be divided; a person
must either be in a state of good and at the same time of truth,
therefore, or he must be in a state of evil and at the same time
of falsity.Further discussions may be found as well.
- 87. [Good and truth are united]
- (3) There is good’s truth and from this
truth’s good, or truth resulting from good and good resulting from
that truth, and implanted in these two from creation is an
inclination to join together into one.-
- 88. [Good’s truth and truth’s good]
88. (3) There is good’s truth and from this truth’s good, or
truth resulting from good and good resulting from that truth, and
implanted in these two from creation is an inclination to join
together into one. It is necessary to form some clear idea of
these concepts, because on it depends any recognition of the
essential origin of married love. For, as explained below, good’s
truth or truth resulting from good is masculine, and truth’s good
or good resulting from that truth is feminine.This may be more clearly understood, however, if instead of
good we say love, and instead of truth, wisdom (that they mean the
same thing, see above, no. 84).Wisdom cannot take form in a person except through a love of
growing wise. If this love is removed, a person is completely
incapable of becoming wise. Wisdom resulting from this love is
what is meant by good’s truth or truth resulting from good.On the other hand, when a person has acquired wisdom for
himself as a result of that love, and he loves that wisdom in
himself or himself on account of that wisdom, then he forms
another love, which is a love of wisdom, and this is meant by
truth’s good or good resulting from that truth.[2] There are, in consequence, two loves in a man, one of which
is the love of growing wise, which comes first, and the second of
which is the love of wisdom, which comes afterwards.But if this second love continues on in a man, it is an evil
love, and is called conceit or love of his own intelligence. It
will be established later that to keep this love from destroying
man, it was provided from creation that this love be taken from
him and transferred into woman, so that it might become married
love, which makes him whole again. (Something concerning these two
loves and the transfer of the second love into woman may be seen
above, nos. 32, 33, and in the
Introduction, no. 20.)If instead of love, therefore, we think good, and instead of
wisdom, truth, then it follows from what we have now said that
there is good’s truth or truth resulting from good, and truth’s
consequent good or good resulting from that truth.
- 88. [Good’s truth and truth’s good]
- 89. [The inclination to join]
89. Implanted in these two from creation is an inclination to
join together into one, for the reason that one was formed out of
the other. Wisdom is formed out of a love of growing wise, which
is to say that truth is formed as a result of good. And a love of
wisdom is formed as a result of that wisdom, or in other words,
the good of truth is formed as a result of that truth.From this process of formation it can be seen that they have a
mutual inclination to reunite themselves and to join together into
one. But this happens only in the case of men who are in a state
of genuine wisdom, and in women who are in a state of love for
that wisdom in their husbands, thus who are in a state of true
married love. As for the wisdom that a man needs to have and that
a wife ought to love, however, this, too, will be discussed later.
-
- (4) In members of the animal kingdom, good’s
truth or truth resulting from good is masculine, and truth’s
consequent goodness or good resulting from that truth is feminine.-
- 90. [Intellect oriented]
90. (4) In members of the animal kingdom, good’s truth or truth
resulting from good is masculine, and truth’s consequent goodness
or good resulting from that truth is feminine. We showed above
(nos. 84-86) that a constant union of love and
wisdom or marriage of goodness and truth flows in from the Lord,
the Creator and Sustainer of the universe, and that created
vessels receive it, each according to its form. Reason can see,
moreover, that from this marriage or union, the male sex receives
the truth of wisdom, and to it the Lord joins goodness of love
according to his reception. Also, that this reception takes place
in the intellect, and that the male sex is therefore born to
become intellect-oriented. Reason can see this from its own sight
of various characteristics in the male, especially from his
disposition, his employment, his behavior, and his physique.[2] With respect to the disposition of the male, reason sees
that it is a disposition to know, understand, and be wise – a
disposition to know in childhood, a disposition to understand in
adolescence and early youth, and a disposition to be wise from
this time of his youth on into old age. From this it is evident
that the male is by nature or temperament inclined to develop his
understanding, consequently that he is born to become
intellect-oriented. But because this cannot happen apart from
love, therefore the Lord attaches love to him according to his
reception, that is, according to the spirit in him that wills to
become wise.[3] With respect to his employment, reason sees that it has to
do with things involving the intellect, or things in which the
intellect predominates, most of which are occupational and are
directed towards serving the public.With respect to his behavior, reason sees that his customary
habits all stem from a predominance of the intellect.
Consequently, the actions of his life, meant by behavior, are
directed by reason – or if they are not, he wants them to appear
so. A masculine exercise of reason is also visible in his every
virtue.With respect to his physique, reason sees that it is different
and totally distinct from the figure of the female – on which
subject, something may also be seen above, no. 33.In addition to these traits, there is the power of insemination
which resides in the male. This has no other source than the
intellect, for its source is truth there resulting from good. That
the power of insemination comes from this source will be seen
later.
- 90. [Intellect oriented]
- 91. [Will oriented]
91. In contrast, the female is born to be will-oriented, but
will-oriented in response to the intellectual orientation of the
male, or in other words, to be a lover of the wisdom in a man,
because she was formed by means of his wisdom (regarding which,
see above, nos. 88, 89). This
can also be seen from the disposition of the female, her
employment, her behavior, and her figure.With respect to the disposition of the female, it can be seen
that it is a disposition to love knowledge, intelligence and
wisdom – though not in herself but in a man – and for that reason
to love a man. For a man is not lovable simply on account of his
physique, the fact that he looks like a man, but on account of the
gifts he has in him which make him human.With respect to the employment of the female, it can be seen
that it has to do with things that are works of the hands and are
called sewing, needlework, and other names, which serve for
decoration, for her personal adornment, and for enhancing her
beauty. Also, that it has to do as well with various tasks called
domestic, which complement the tasks of men (which, as we said,
are called occupational). Women do these things out of an
inclination towards marriage, in order to become wives and so one
with their husbands.With respect to the behavior and figure of the female, it is
evident without explanation that the same thing is visible from
these.
-
- (5) From the marriage of good and truth
flowing in from the Lord comes love for the opposite sex and also
married love.-
- 92. [The origin of sexual love]
92. (5) From the marriage of good and truth flowing in from the
Lord comes love for the opposite sex and also married love. We
showed above (nos. 84-87) that goodness and
truth are universal in creation, and are therefore in all created
vessels; that they are present in these vessels according to each
one’s form; and that good and truth emanate from the Lord not as
two entities but as a unity. It follows from this that there is a
universal conjugal atmosphere emanating from the Lord and
pervading the universe from the firsts to the lasts of it, thus
from angels all the way down to worms.Such an atmosphere of a marriage of good and truth emanates
from the Lord because it is at the same time an atmosphere of
propagation, that is, of procreation and fructification. It is
also the same thing as the Divine providence in the preservation
of the universe by successive generations.Now because that universal atmosphere, which is an atmosphere
of a marriage of good and truth, flows into its vessels according
to each one’s form (no. 86), it follows that the
male sex receives it according to its form, thus in the intellect,
because the male is an intellect-oriented form, and that the
female sex receives it according to its form, thus in the will,
because the female is a will-oriented form derived from the
intellect-oriented form of the male. And because the same
atmosphere is also an atmosphere of procreation, it follows that
it is the origin of love between the sexes.
- 92. [The origin of sexual love]
- 93. [The origin of married love]
93. This atmosphere is as well the origin of married love,
because it flows into forms of wisdom among people and also
angels. For a person can grow in wisdom till the end of his life
in the world, and afterwards to eternity in heaven, and as he
grows in wisdom, so his form is perfected. This form does not
receive a love for the opposite sex but love for one of the sex,
for with this one he can be united even to inmost levels, where
heaven resides with its felicities. This union is the union of
married love.
-
- (6) A love for the opposite sex is a love of
the external or natural man, and is therefore common to every
animal.- 94. [Sexual love is external]
94. (6) A love for the opposite sex is a love of the external
or natural man, and is therefore common to every animal. Everybody
is born carnal and becomes more and more inwardly natural, and to
the extent that he loves intelligence he becomes rational, and
afterwards, if he loves wisdom, he becomes spiritual. (We will say
later, in no. 130, what that wisdom is, by
which a person becomes spiritual.)Now as a person advances from knowledge to intelligence, and
from this to wisdom, his mind also changes its form accordingly,
for it opens up more and more and becomes more closely connected
with heaven and through heaven with the Lord. Consequently the
person becomes a greater lover of truth and more devoted to
goodness of life.If a person stops, therefore, at the first stage in his
progress towards wisdom, the form of his mind remains natural, and
it receives the inflowing of the universal atmosphere – the
atmosphere of the marriage between good and truth – in just the
same way as it is received by the lower members of the animal
kingdom called beasts and birds. And because these are merely
natural, the person becomes like them, and consequently he feels a
love for the opposite sex in the same way they do.This is what we mean by the statement that a love for the
opposite sex is a love of the external or natural man, and is
therefore common to every animal.
- 94. [Sexual love is external]
- (7) But married love is a love of the
internal or spiritual man, and is therefore peculiar to mankind.-
- 95. [Married love is internal]
95. (7) But married love is a love of the internal or spiritual
man, and is peculiar to mankind. Married love is a love of the
internal or spiritual man because the more intelligent and wise a
person becomes, the more internal or spiritual he becomes. The
more, too, is the form of his mind perfected, and the perfected
form receives married love, for it perceives and feels in that
love a spiritual delight that is inwardly blessed, and a natural
delight arising from that love which takes its soul, life and
essence from the spiritual delight.
- 95. [Married love is internal]
- 96. [Married love is human]
96. Married love is peculiar to mankind because only a human
being can become spiritual. For a human being can raise his
understanding above his natural loves and from that elevation view
them beneath him, make judgments about their character, and also
correct, discipline, and remove them. No animal can do this
because its loves are inseparable from its instinctive knowledge,
and this knowledge cannot therefore be raised into intelligence,
and still less into wisdom. Consequently an animal is carried
along by the love enrooted in its knowledge, like a blind man
being led through the streets by his dog.It is because of this that married love is peculiar to mankind.
It may even be said to be native or indigenous to mankind, because
mankind possesses a capacity for becoming wise, a capacity with
which this love is united.
-
- (8) Married love in a person lies within love
for the opposite sex, like a gem in its native rock.- 97. [Married love withing sexual love]
97. (8) Married love in a person lies within love for the
opposite sex, like a gem in its native rock. Since this is only a
metaphor, however, it will be explained under the next heading. It
illustrates further that a love for the opposite sex is a love of
the external or natural man, while married love is a love of the
internal or spiritual man, as we showed just above (nos. 94-96).
- 97. [Married love withing sexual love]
- (9) A love for the opposite sex in a person
is not the origin of married love, but it is its first stage, being
thus like any external natural quality in which an internal
spiritual one is implanted.- 98. [Not the origin of married love]
98. (9) A love for the opposite sex in a person is not the
origin of married love, but it is its first stage, being thus like
any external natural quality in which an internal spiritual one is
implanted. We are referring here to true married love, and not the
ordinary love which is also called married, and which in some
cases is nothing more than a love for the opposite sex that has
been restricted. True married love in contrast exists solely in
people who are eager for wisdom and who accordingly advance
further and further into it. The Lord foresees these people and
provides married love for them. In such people married love indeed
begins with a love for the opposite sex, or rather, through the
agency of that love, but still it does not originate from it. For
it springs up as wisdom advances and emerges into light in the
person, wisdom and married love being inseparable companions.[2] We say that married love begins through the agency of a
love for the opposite sex because before a married partner is
found, a person loves the opposite sex in general and regards it
with loving eyes. In their company he also treats the opposite sex
with courteous morality. For the adolescent is in a period of
choosing, and at that time his external nature grows pleasantly
warm from a deep-seated inclination to marriage with one, which
lies hidden in the inner sanctum of his mind.We also say that married love begins through the agency of a
love for the opposite sex for the further reason that decisions to
marry are delayed for various reasons, even till half one’s youth
is spent, and in the meantime the beginning of married love is
felt as lust, which in some cases goes off into love between the
sexes in act. But still, in such people, it is not given free rein
further than is healthy. This refers, however, to the male sex,
because it suffers an enticement that actively arouses it. It does
not refer to the female sex.[3] It is apparent from this that a love for the opposite sex
is not the origin of true married love, but that it is its first
stage, being first in time, but not in end. For that which is
first in end is what is first in the mind and its intention, this
being the primary objective. But no one reaches this primary
objective except gradually, through intermediate steps. These
steps are not primary goals in themselves, but only means of
advancement to that which is primary in them.
- 98. [Not the origin of married love]
- (10) When married love has been implanted,
love for the opposite sex turns around and becomes a chaste love for
the opposite sex.- 99. [Married love makes sexual love chaste]
99. (10) When married love has been implanted, love for the
opposite sex turns around and becomes a chaste love for the
opposite sex. We say that love for the opposite sex then turns
around, because when married love comes to its source, which lies
in the inner recesses of the mind, it sees love for the opposite
sex not before it but behind it, or not above it but below it,
thus viewing it as something it has left in passing. It is similar
to what happens when someone rises from position to position in
his work, finally reaching one much higher in rank, and then looks
back at the positions behind or below him through which he passed.
Or to what happens when someone plans a journey to the court of
some king, then after his arrival turns and looks back on the
things he saw on the way.Testimony that love for the opposite sex still remains then and
becomes chaste, and yet sweeter than before to people who are in a
state of true married love – this may be seen from the description
of it by people who are in the spiritual world, recorded in two
accounts from that world in nos. 44 and 55.
- 99. [Married love makes sexual love chaste]
- (11) Male and female were created to be the
very image of the marriage between good and truth.- 100. [The image of the marriage of good and
truth]100. (11) Male and female were created to be the very image of
the marriage between good and truth. This is because the male was
created to be an expression of the understanding of truth, thus a
picture of truth, and the female was created to be an expression
of the will of good, thus a picture of good, and implanted in both
from their inmost beings is an inclination to conjunction into one
(see above, no. 88). Thus the two together form
a single image, which imitates the conjugal model of good and
truth.We say that it imitates this model, because it is not identical
to it but similar. For the good that attaches itself to the truth
in a man comes directly from the Lord, whereas the wife’s good
that attaches itself to the truth in a man comes from the Lord
indirectly through the wife. Consequently there are two kinds of
good, one internal, one external, which attach themselves to the
truth in a husband and cause the husband to remain constant in an
understanding of truth and so in a state of wisdom through the
agency of true married love.But more on this subject later.
- 100. [The image of the marriage of good and
- (12) They are an image of that marriage in
their inmost qualities and thus in their subsequent ones as the
inner faculties of their minds are opened.-
- 101. [Marriage begins in the soul]
101. (12) A married couple is an image of that marriage in
their inmost qualities and thus in their subsequent ones as the
inner faculties of their minds are opened. Every person consists
of three components which follow in order in him: soul, mind, and
body. The inmost one is his soul. The intermediate one is his
mind. And the outmost one is his body. Everything that flows into
a person from the Lord flows first into his inmost component,
which is the soul, and descends from there into his intermediate
component, which is the mind, and through this into his outmost
component, which is the body.A marriage of good and truth flows in from the Lord in a person
in the same way. It flows into his soul directly, and continues
from there into the subsequent faculties, and through these to the
outmost constituents. And thus conjointly they bring about married
love.It is apparent from a consideration of this influx that a
married couple is an image of the marriage between good and truth
in their inmost qualities and thus in their subsequent ones.
- 101. [Marriage begins in the soul]
- 102. [It develops as their minds are opened]
102. However, married partners become an image of the marriage
between good and truth only as the inner faculties of their minds
are opened, because the mind only gradually opens from infancy to
late old age. For people are born carnal, and they become rational
as the mind just above the body opens and as this rationality is
purified and decanted, so to speak, from its dregs – from
fallacious appearances that flow in from the physical senses and
from urges that flow in from temptations of the flesh. Rationality
thus opens, and this is accomplished only through wisdom. Then,
when the inner faculties of the rational mind have been opened,
the person becomes an image of wisdom, and this wisdom is the
receptacle of true married love.The wisdom which forms this image and receives this love is
rational and at the same time moral wisdom. Rational wisdom views
the truths and good virtues that inwardly appear in a person not
as qualities belonging to him but as qualities flowing in from the
Lord. And moral wisdom shuns evils and falsities as contagious
diseases – especially lascivious ones which contaminate his
married love.
-
- The origin of married love and its vigor or
potency, discussed by wise men assembled from the European world
(nos. 103–114).-
- 103. [A convocation on married love]
103. To this I will append two narrative accounts. Here is the
first:One morning before sunrise, I looked out towards the east in
the spiritual world and I saw four horsemen seemingly flying out
of a cloud that shone with the blaze of dawn. On the heads of the
horsemen I saw curled helmets[*1], on their arms what appeared to
be wings, and about their bodies light orange-colored tunics. Thus
dressed, like racers they rose up on their horses and held the
reins out over their manes, so that the horses went out at a
gallop like wing-footed steeds.I followed their course or flight with my eyes, with a mind to
find out where they were going. Then suddenly three of the
horsemen peeled off in three directions, to the south, the west,
and the north, while the fourth pulled up after a short space and
came to a halt in the east.[2] Wondering at this, I looked up to heaven and asked where
the horsemen were going. I received the reply, “To the wise
in the kingdoms of Europe, people of polished reason and keen
sight in analytical investigations who enjoyed a reputation for
genius among their contemporaries. They are being summoned to come
and solve the secret of the origin of married love and its vigor
or potency.”Those speaking from heaven also said, “Keep looking, and
in a little while you will see twenty-seven carriages, three with
Spaniards in them, three with natives of France or Frenchmen,
three with Italians, three with Germans, three with natives of the
Netherlands or Dutchmen, three with Englishmen, three with Swedes,
three with Danes, and three with Poles.”Then, after two hours, their carriages appeared, drawn by
ponies light bay in color with strikingly decorated harnesses. And
traveling rapidly to an immense house visible in the border region
between the east and the south, the riders all got out of their
carriages around the house and boldly went in.[3] Moreover I was then told, “Go on over and go in, too,
and you will hear.”I went and entered the house, and examining it inside, I saw
that it was square, with sides facing towards the four points of
the compass. Each of the sides had three high windows containing
panes of crystal, whose frames were made of olive wood. From
either side of the frames projected walls in the form of rooms,
with vaulted ceilings and containing tables. These walls were made
out of cedar, the ceilings out of fine sandarac wood[*2], and the
floors out of boards of poplar. Against the east wall – where I
did not see any windows – a table stood, overlaid with gold, on
which had been placed a miter covered with precious stones. This
would go as an award or prize to the one who found the secret of
the riddle to be presently put before them.[4] As I looked around at the rooms formed by the projecting
walls, which were like compartments along the windows, I saw in
each of them five men from the same European kingdom, who were
ready and waiting for the topic on which they were to render
judgment.Instantly, then, an angel stood in the middle of the palace and
said, “The subject on which you are to render judgment is the
origin of married love and its vigor or potency. Discuss it and
come to a decision. Then when you have reached a decision, write
your opinion on a piece of paper and put it into the silver urn
that you see placed beside the gold table. Also, sign it with the
initial letter of the kingdom you are from. For example, if you
are natives of France or French, write F. If you are natives of
the Netherlands or Dutch, write N. If you are Italian, write I. If
you are English, write E. If you are Polish, write P. If you are
German, write G. If you are Spanish, write Sp. If you are Danish,
write D. And if you are Swedish, write Sw.”With these words the angel departed, saying as he left, “I
will return.”The five fellow countrymen in each compartment along the
windows then considered this instruction, analyzed the subject,
and after coming to a decision to the best of their ability to
judge, wrote it down on a piece of paper, signed it with the
initial letter of their kingdom, and put it into the hollow silver
container.Three hours later, when they were all finished, the angel
returned to draw the pieces of paper out of the urn one by one and
read them in the presence of the whole gathering.[*1] Probably morions or comb morions.
[*2] Literally, “thyine wood.” See Revelation 18:12,
where it has been variously translated.
- 103. [A convocation on married love]
-
- 104. [Spain: Solar power]
104. From the first piece of paper that his hand happened to
chance upon, the angel then read aloud the following statement:“We five fellow countrymen in our compartment have decided
that the origin of married love comes from the most ancient
peoples in the golden age, and among them, from the creation of
Adam and his wife. The origin of marriage comes from this source,
and with marriage, the origin of married love.“As for the vigor or potency of married love, we trace the
origin of this from no other source than the climate or solar
zone, and thus from the heat of the sun upon the land. We came to
this consideration not as the result of empty figments of reason,
but from the plain indications of experience. We came to it, for
instance, from our knowledge of peoples below the equatorial line
or circle, where the day’s heat blazes like fire, and from
comparing peoples who live nearer that line and peoples who live
further away from it. We also came to this consideration as well
from seeing the cooperation of solar heat with the vital heat in
animals of the earth and birds of the sky in springtime when they
beget their young.“Besides, what is married love but heat, which, if
strengthened by additional heat from the sun, becomes vigorous or
potent.”This statement was signed below with the letters, Sp., the
initial letters of the kingdom the writers were from.
- 104. [Spain: Solar power]
-
- 105. [Netherlands: Chastity]
105. After this the angel reached his hand into the urn a
second time, and taking out another piece of paper, he read from
it the following opinion:“We fellow countrymen in our group agreed that the origin
of married love is the same as the origin of marriage, which has
been prescribed by law to restrain the inborn urges in people for
adulterous relationships that destroy the soul, pollute the mind’s
reason, corrupt morals, and waste the body with disease. For
adulterous relationships are not human but beastlike, not rational
but animal, and thus not at all Christian but barbarian. A
condemnation of such things led to the origination of marriage,
and at the same time of married love.“It is similar with the vigor or potency of this love. It
depends on chastity, which means abstaining from promiscuous and
licentious relationships. The reason is that in one who makes love
to his partner only, the vigor and potency is preserved for just
that one person, and is thus collected and concentrated, so to
speak, and then it becomes like a fine quintessence from which the
impurities have been removed, a quintessence that would otherwise
be dissipated and discharged every which way.“One among the five of us, who is a priest, added also the
idea of predestination as a reason for this vigor or potency,
saying, “Are marriages not predestined? And since these are
predestined, so, too, are the offspring resulting from them and
the varying abilities to beget them.” The man insisted on
this as a cause because he had sworn himself to it.”This statement was signed below with the letter N.
On hearing it, someone said in a mocking tone, “Predestination!
Oh, what a beautiful excuse for inability or impotence!”
- 105. [Netherlands: Chastity]
-
- 106. [Italy: Possessive and permissive]
106. Next, drawing for the third time a piece of paper from the
urn, the angel read from it the following opinion:“We fellow countrymen in our cubicle discussed causes of
the origin of married love, and we saw the leading one of these to
be the same as the original cause for marriage, since before
marriage married love did not exist. It came about, then, because
when anyone is dying for or desperately loves a young woman, he
tries with his heart and soul to possess her as his most prized
possession. And as soon as she pledges herself to him, he regards
her as an owner regards his property. That this is the origin of
married love is plainly evident from everyone’s fury at rivals and
jealousness against intruders.“We considered afterwards the origin of the vigor or
potency of that love, and the prevailing opinion of three against
two was that vigor or potency with one’s partner comes from having
some license in matters of sex. They said that they know from
experience that the potency of promiscuous love is greater than
the potency of married love.”This statement was signed below with the letter I.
When the others heard this, they cried from the tables, “Put
that paper away and take another from the urn.”
- 106. [Italy: Possessive and permissive]
-
- 107. [England: wise laws and health]
107. So after a moment the angel pulled out a fourth piece of
paper, from which he read the following statement:“We fellow countrymen under our window have decided that
the origin of married love is the same as the origin of love for
the opposite sex, because it results from it. The difference is
only that a love for the opposite sex is unrestricted,
uninhibited, liberated, indiscriminate and fickle, while married
love is restricted, directed, contained, sure and constant.
Married love has therefore been prescribed and established by the
prudence of human wisdom, because otherwise there would be no
empire, no kingdom, no commonwealth, indeed no society, but people
would roam through the fields and forests in bands and troops with
licentious and stolen women, and they would flee from place to
place to escape bloody slaughter, rape and pillage, by which the
whole human race would be wiped out of existence.“That is our judgment regarding the origin of married
love.“As for the vigor or potency of married love, however, we
trace the origin of this from physical health that lasts
throughout life from birth to old age. For a person who remains
uninjured and possessed of steady good health does not lack in
vigor. His fibers, sinews, and muscles, including the suspensory
muscles of the testes, do not grow sluggish, loose and flabby, but
continue in the strength of their powers. See that you stay well.”This statement was signed below with the letter E.
- 107. [England: wise laws and health]
-
- 108. [Poland: the first passion of love]
108. A fifth time the angel drew a piece of paper from the urn,
and he read from it the following opinion:“We fellow countrymen at our table, with the rationality
our minds possess, looked into the origin of married love and the
origin of its vigor or potency. And with well-considered
reasonings we saw and confirmed that married love takes its origin
simply from the following circumstance: that owing to
inflammations and thus stimulations concealed in the inmost
recesses of his mind and body, after experiencing various lusts
with his eyes, everybody at last turns and inclines his mind to
one of the feminine sex, until he inwardly burns with passion for
her. From that time on, his burning passion mounts from flame to
flame till it becomes a blazing fire. In this state sexual lust is
banished, and instead of lust comes married love.“In this blazing state of passion, a young man engaged to
be married does not know but that the vigor or potency of this
love will never cease, for he has not experienced and so does not
know about the state in which the powers fail and in which love
then grows cool after its delights are over.“The origin of married love, therefore, comes from that
first state of passion before the wedding, and from this comes its
vigor or potency. After the wedding, however, its fires change,
sometimes lessening, sometimes increasing. But still its potency
continues with steady change or with a steady lessening and
increasing until old age, by the prudent exercise of self-control
and by restraining the lusts that break out from the caverns of
the mind before they have been cleansed of their filth. For lust
exists before wisdom.“That is our judgment regarding the origin and continuance
of marital vigor or potency.”This statement was signed below with the letter P.
- 108. [Poland: the first passion of love]
-
- 109. [Germany: a distinct and higher love]
109. A sixth time the angel drew out a piece of paper, and he
read from it the following opinion:“We fellow countrymen in our party looked around for the
causes of the origin of married love, and we agreed on two. One of
these is the proper upbringing of children, and the other, the
clear claim of heirs to their inheritances.“We selected these two, because they are aimed and
directed towards the same objective, this being the public good.
This is achieved by these means, because children conceived and
born of married love become the proper and true offspring of both
parents; and as objects of a parental love that is deepened by
their being of legitimate descent, they are raised to become the
heirs of all their parents’ possessions, both spiritual and
natural. Reason sees that the public good is founded on a proper
upbringing of children and on the clear claim of heirs to their
inheritances.“A love for the opposite sex is one thing, and married
love another. Married love appears to be the same as a love for
the opposite sex, but it is distinctly different. Nor is the one
love on the same level as the other, but the one is within the
other; and whatever is within is nobler than that which is
without. Furthermore, we saw that married love by creation is
within and concealed in love for the opposite sex just like an
almond inside its shell. Consequently, when married love is broken
out of its shell, which is love for the opposite sex, it shines
before the angels like a gemstone of beryl or a star sapphire.
Such is the case because married love has engraved on it the
salvation of the whole human race, which is what we mean by the
public good.“That is our judgment regarding the origin of this love.
“With respect to the origin of its vigor or potency,
moreover, from considering its causes we have come to the
conclusion that the origin is the removal or separation of married
love from a love for the opposite sex, which is accomplished by
wisdom on the part of the man, and by love of the man’s wisdom on
the part of the wife. For a love for the opposite sex is shared in
common with animals, whereas married love is peculiar to human
beings. In the measure that married love is removed and separated
from a love for the opposite sex, therefore, in the same measure
is a person a human being and not an animal; and a human being
gets his vigor or potency from his love, as an animal does from
its love.”This statement was signed below with the letter G.
- 109. [Germany: a distinct and higher love]
-
- 110. [France: Delight and pleasure]
110. A seventh time the angel drew out a piece of paper, and he
read from it the following opinion:“We representatives in the room under the light from our
window found our thoughts and our consequent judgments stimulated
by reflecting on married love. Who is not stimulated by this love?
For when it fills the mind, it at the same time fills the whole
body.“We judge the origin of this love from its delights. Who
knows or ever has known the path any love takes except from its
delight and pleasure? The delights of married love are felt in
their origins as blessings, felicities, and states of happiness,
in their derivative states as gratifications and pleasures, and in
their final states as the most consummate of delights.“Love for the opposite sex has its origin, therefore, when
the inner faculties of the mind and thus the inner faculties of
the body are opened to receive the inflowing of these delights;
but the origin of married love occurs at the time the states of
engagement and betrothal begin and when through these states the
first atmosphere of that love advances these delights into an real
conception of them.“With respect to the vigor or potency of married love,
this results from the capacity of this love and its flow to pass
from the mind into the body. For the mind is in the body from the
head whenever it feels and acts, especially when it is
experiencing the delights of this love. We judge the degrees of
its potency and the constancies of its successive expressions to
be a consequence of this.“Moreover, we also trace the vigor of its potency as
coming from heredity. If it is superior in the father, it becomes
also superior by transmission in the offspring. Reason agrees with
experience that this superior ability is by transmission
reproduced, inherited, and passed down.”This statement was signed below with the letter F.
- 110. [France: Delight and pleasure]
-
- 111. [Denmark: Love is from love]
111. An eighth time a piece of paper was drawn, and the angel
read from it the following opinion:“We fellow countrymen in our meeting did not find the
actual origin of married love, because it lies inmostly hidden
away in the sacred repositories of the mind. The most consummate
wisdom cannot with any ray of understanding even touch that love
in its origin. We formed a number of theories, but after vainly
debating the finer points, we did not know whether we had come up
with empty guesses or sound opinions. Anyone, therefore, who would
ferret out the origin of married love from the sacred repositories
of the mind and bring it before his view, let him go to an oracle!“As for us, we considered this love on a level below its
origin, observing that it is spiritual in the mind and is like the
wellspring of a pleasant stream there. From this point it flows
down into the breast, where it becomes delightful and is called a
love of the heart, which regarded in itself is full of friendship
and full of confidence resulting from a total inclination to
mutual companionship. Then, when it has passed down through the
breast, it becomes a sexual love.“When a young man in his thoughts reflects on these and
similar considerations, which he does when he chooses one of the
opposite sex for himself in preference to the rest, they kindle in
his heart the fire of married love. Since this fire is the first
kindling of that love, it is its origin.“As for the origin of its vigor or potency, we acknowledge
no other source than the love itself, for love and ability are
inseparable companions. But still they are such that sometimes the
one leads and sometimes the other. When love leads and vigor or
potency follows it, both are noble, because the potency is then
the vigor of married love. But if potency leads and love follows,
then both are ignoble, because love is then love belonging to a
carnal potency. We judge the quality of each, therefore, depending
on the order in which love descends or ascends and thus proceeds
from its origin to its goal.”This statement was signed below with the letter D.
- 111. [Denmark: Love is from love]
-
- 112. [Sweden: from creation]
112. A final and ninth time the angel took up a piece of paper,
and he read from it the following opinion:“We fellow countrymen in our committee applied our
judgment to the two aspects of the subject proposed – to the
origin of married love, and to the origin of its vigor or potency.“When we debated the finer points regarding the origin of
married love, in order to avoid obscurities in our arguments we
drew distinctions between a spiritual, a natural, and a carnal
love between the sexes. By a spiritual love between the sexes we
mean true married love, because it is spiritual. By a natural love
between the sexes we mean polygamous love, because it is natural.
And by a merely carnal love between the sexes we mean licentious
love, because it is merely carnal.“When we looked with our powers of judgment into true
married love, we saw clearly that this love is possible only
between one male and one female, and that it is from creation
heavenly, most interior, and the soul and parent of all good
loves, having been inspired into the first parents and capable of
being inspired into Christians. It is also so conjunctive that by
it two minds can become one mind, and two persons like one person,
which is what is meant by their becoming one flesh.“That this love was inspired from creation is apparent
from these words in the book of creation:And a man shall leave his father and mother and cling to his
wife, and they shall become one flesh. (Genesis 2:24)“That it can be inspired into Christians is apparent from
these verses:(Jesus said,) “Have you not read that He who made them at
the beginning “made them male and female,” and said,
“For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and
cling to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh”? So
then, they are no longer two but one flesh.” (Matthew 19:4-6)“The subject is the origin of married love.
“As for the origin of the vigor or potency of true married
love, moreover, we theorize that it comes from a similarity and
unanimity of minds. For when two minds are joined in marriage,
their thoughts then spiritually kiss each other, and they inspire
in the body their vigor or potency.”This statement was signed below with the letters Sw.
- 112. [Sweden: from creation]
-
- 113. [Africa: From God]
113. A rectangular screen had been set up in the palace in
front of the doors, and behind it stood foreigners from Africa,
who called to the natives of Europe, “Permit one of us to
present an opinion, too, regarding the origin of married love and
its vigor or potency.”All the tables then signaled with their hands permission for
him to do so.Then one of them entered and stood beside the table on which
the miter had been placed. He said:“You Christians trace the origin of married love from the
love itself. We Africans, on the other hand, trace it from the God
of heaven and earth.“Is married love not a chaste, pure and holy love? Are the
angels of heaven not in an enjoyment of it? The whole human race,
and therefore the entire angelic heaven – are they not the
offspring of this love? Could anything so wonderful spring from
any other source than God Himself, the Creator and Sustainer of
the universe?“You Christians trace the origin of marital vigor or
potency from various rational and natural causes. We Africans,
however, trace it from a person’s state of conjunction with the
God of the universe. (We call this state a state of religion, but
you call it a state of the church.) We trace it from this origin,
for when love comes from this source and is constant and lasting,
it cannot help but maintain its vigor, a vigor that is like the
love, thus also constant and lasting.“True married love is not known except to the few who are
near to God. Neither, therefore, is the potency of this love known
to others. Angels in heaven describe the potency accompanying this
love as the delight of endless spring.”
- 113. [Africa: From God]
- 114. [The prize]
114. At the conclusion of these words the people all rose, and
suddenly, behind the gold table on which the miter rested, a
window materialized that had not been visible before. Through it
also came a voice, saying, “The miter will go to the
African.”The angel then gave the miter to him, handing it to him rather
than placing it on his head. And the African went away home with
it.The inhabitants of the kingdoms of Europe also went out and got
into their carriages, in which they returned to their companions.
-
- A piece of paper sent down from heaven to
the earth, on which was written, “The marriage between good and
truth” (no. 115).- 115. [A message obscured]
115. The second account:
Awakened from sleep in the middle of the night, I saw an angel
at some height towards the east, holding in his right hand a piece
of paper. It appeared in a shining brilliance owing to the light
coming in from the sun. In the middle of the paper there was
writing in gold letters, and I saw the phrase, “The marriage
between good and truth.” From the writing sprang a radiance
that turned into a large halo around the piece of paper. The halo
or ring consequently had an appearance similar to the appearance
of dawn in springtime.After this I saw the angel descending with the paper in his
hand. Moreover, as he descended, the paper appeared less and less
bright, and the writing – which said, “The marriage between
good and truth” – turned from the color of gold to silver,
then to the color of copper, next to the color of iron, and lastly
to the color of rusty iron and corroded copper. Finally I saw the
angel enter a dark cloud and descend through the cloud to the
ground. There the piece of paper disappeared, although the angel
was still holding it in his hand. (This took place in the world of
spirits, the world all people go to first after they die.)[2] The angel then spoke to me, saying, “Ask the people
who are coming this way whether they see me and whether they see
anything in my hand.”A host of people came – a crowd from the east, a crowd from the
south, a crowd from the west, and a crowd from the north. Those
coming from the east and south were people who in the world had
devoted themselves to becoming learned, and I asked them whether
they saw anyone with me there and whether they saw anything in his
hand. They all said they saw nothing at all.I then asked the people who came from the west and north. They
were people who in the world had believed whatever the learned
said. They said they did not see anything, either.The last of these, however, were people who in the world had
possessed a simple faith stemming from charity, or some truth
resulting from goodness, and after the people before them went
away, they said that they saw a man with a piece of paper – a man
handsomely dressed, and a piece of paper with letters printed on
it. Moreover, when they looked more closely, they said they could
read the phrase, “The marriage between good and truth.”
Then they spoke to the angel, asking him to tell them what it
meant.[3] The angel said that everything which exists in the whole of
heaven and everything which exists in the whole world is nothing
but a form of the marriage between good and truth, since each and
every thing was created out of and into a marriage of good and
truth – both everything that lives and breathes and also whatever
does not live and breathe.“There is nothing,” he said, “that was created
solely into a form of truth, and nothing that was created solely
into a form of good. Good alone or truth alone has no reality, but
they take form and become real through a marriage of the two, the
character of the resulting form being determined by the character
of the marriage.“Divine good and Divine truth in the Lord the Creator are
good and truth in their very essence. The being of His essence is
Divine good, and the expression of His essence is Divine truth. In
Him, moreover, good and truth exist in their very union, for in
Him they are infinitely united. Since these two are united in Him,
the Creator, therefore they are also united in each and every
thing created by Him. By this the Creator is also conjoined with
all things created by Him in an eternal covenant like that of a
marriage.”[4] The angel said further that the Holy Scripture, which came
directly from the Lord, is as a whole and in every part an
expression of the marriage between good and truth. And because the
church, which is formed through truth of doctrine, and religion,
which is formed through goodness of life in accordance with truth
of doctrine, are in the case of Christians based solely on the
Holy Scripture, it can be seen that the church as a whole and in
every part is an expression of the marriage between good and
truth. (For an explanation of this, see The Apocalypse Revealed,
nos. 373, 483.)The same thing that the angel said above regarding the marriage
of good and truth he also said of the marriage between charity and
faith, since good has to do with charity and truth has to do with
faith.Some of the first people, who had not seen the angel or the
writing, were still standing around, and on hearing these things
they mumbled, “Yes, of course. We see that.”But then the angel said to them, “Turn away from me a
little and repeat what you said.”So they turned away, and they said quite plainly, “No, it
isn’t so.”[5] Afterwards the angel spoke with some married couples about
the marriage of good and truth, saying that if their minds were in
a such a state of marriage, with the husband being a form of truth
and the wife a form of the good of that truth, they would both
experience the blissful delights of innocence and thus the
happiness that angels of heaven enjoy.“In such a state,” he said, “the husband’s power
of insemination would continually be in the spring of youth, and
he would therefore remain in the effort and power to transmit his
truth, and the wife, out of love, would be in a continual state to
receive it.“The wisdom that men have from the Lord knows no greater
delight than to transmit its truths. And the love of wisdom that
wives have in heaven knows no greater pleasure than to receive
them as though in a womb, and thus to conceive them, carry them,
and give them birth.“That is what spiritual procreations are like among angels
of heaven. And if you would believe it, natural procreations come
also from the same origin.”After bidding all farewell, the angel rose from the earth, and
passing through the cloud, ascended into heaven. Moreover, as he
ascended, the piece of paper then began to shine as before, until
the halo that had previously had the appearance of dawn suddenly
descended and dispelled the cloud which had cast a shadow over the
earth, and it became sunny.
- 115. [A message obscured]
-
- 116. THE MARRIAGE OF THE LORD AND THE CHURCH
AND CORRESPONDENCE TO IT-
- 116. [THE MARRIAGE OF THE LORD AND THE CHURCH]
This chapter also takes up the marriage of the Lord and the
church and correspondence to it, because without a knowledge and
understanding of the subject, scarcely anyone can see that married
love in its origin is sacred, spiritual and heavenly, and that it
comes from the Lord. Some in the church indeed say that marriage
has a relationship to the marriage of the Lord with the church, but
they do not know what the nature of that relationship is.In order to make this relationship perceptible to some sight of
the understanding, therefore, we must discuss in detail that sacred
marriage which exists with and in those people who form the Lord’s
church. They, too, and not others, possess true married love.To explain this secret, however, we must divide our treatment
into sections under the following headings:(1) In the Word, the Lord is called a Bridegroom and Husband,
and the church a bride and wife; and the conjunction of the Lord
with the church and the reciprocal conjunction of the church with
the Lord is called a marriage.(2) The Lord is also called Father, and the church, mother.
(3) The offspring from the Lord as Husband and Father and from
the church as wife and mother are all spiritual offspring, and this
is what is meant in the spiritual sense of the Word by sons and
daughters, brothers and sisters, sons-in-law and daughters-in-law,
and by other terms which have to do with descending generations.(4) The spiritual offspring that are born from the marriage of
the Lord with the church are truths, from which come understanding,
perception and all thought; and also qualities of goodness, from
which come love, charity and all affection.(5) From the marriage of good and truth that emanates and flows
in from the Lord, a person acquires truth, to which the Lord joins
good, and in this way the church is formed in the person by the
Lord.(6) A husband does not represent the Lord and his wife the
church, because both husbands and wives together form the church.(7) Therefore neither in the marriages of angels in heaven nor
in the marriages of people on earth does the husband correspond to
the Lord and the wife to the church.(8) Rather, the correspondence rests with married love,
insemination, procreation, love for little children, and other
things of a similar sort that occur in marriage and result from it.(9) The Word is the means of conjunction, because it is from the
Lord and thus is the Lord.(10) The church comes from the Lord and it exists in people who
go to Him and live according to His commandments.(11) Married love depends on the state of the church in a
person, because it depends on the state of his wisdom.(12) So, then, because the church comes from the Lord, married
love comes from Him as well.Now follows the development of these points.
- 116. [THE MARRIAGE OF THE LORD AND THE CHURCH]
- (1) In the Word, the Lord is called a
Bridegroom and Husband, and the church a bride and wife; and the
conjunction of the Lord with the church and the reciprocal
conjunction of the church with the Lord is called a marriage.- 117. [The Lord as husband and church as wife]
117. (1) In the Word, the Lord is called a Bridegroom and
Husband, and the church a bride and wife; and the conjunction of
the Lord with the church and the reciprocal conjunction of the
church with the Lord is called a marriage. It can be seen from the
following passages that the Lord is called a Bridegroom and
Husband in the Word, and the church a bride and wife:He who has the bride is the Bridegroom; but the friend of the
Bridegroom (is the one) who stands and hears Him, (who) rejoices
greatly because of the Bridegroom’s voice. (John 3:29)(John the Baptist said this in reference to the Lord.)
…Jesus said…, “…As long as the Bridegroom is with
them, the wedding guests cannot fast…. The days will come when
the Bridegroom will be taken away from them; …then they will
fast.” (Matthew 9:15, Mark 2:19,20, Luke 5:34,35)…I…saw the holy city, New Jerusalem…, prepared as a bride
adorned for her Husband. (Revelation 21:2)(That the Lord’s New Church is meant by the New Jerusalem, see
The Apocalypse Revealed, nos. 880, 881.)(An angel said to John,) “Come, and I will show you the
bride, the Lamb’s wife.” (And he showed him) the city, the
holy Jerusalem…. (Revelation 21:9,10)(The time for) the marriage of the Lamb has come, and His wife
has made herself ready…. Blessed are those who are called to the
marriage supper of the Lamb. (Revelation 19:7,9)The bridegroom that the five ready virgins went out to meet,
with whom they went in to the wedding (Matthew 25:1-10), means the
Lord, as is plain from the thirteenth verse, where He says:Watch therefore, for you know neither the day nor the hour in
which the Son of Man will come. (Matthew 25:13)Further references may be found in many passages in the
Prophets as well.
- 117. [The Lord as husband and church as wife]
- (2) The Lord is also called Father, and the
church, mother.-
- 118. [The Lord as Father]
118. (2) The Lord is also called Father, and the church,
mother. That the Lord is called Father is apparent from the
following passages:…Unto us a Child is born, unto us a Son is given…. And His
name will be called Wonderful, Counselor, God…, Everlasting
Father, Prince of Peace. (Isaiah 9:6)You, Jehovah, are our Father; our Redeemer from of old is Your
name. (Isaiah 63:16)(Jesus said,) “He who sees Me sees (the Father) who sent
Me.” (John 12:45)“If you had known Me, you would have known My Father also;
and from now on you know Him and have seen Him.” (John 14:7)Philip said…, “…Show us the Father….” Jesus
said to him, “…He who has seen Me has seen the Father; so
how can you say, “Show us the Father”?” (John
14:8,9)(Jesus said,) “The Father and I are one.” (John
10:30)“All things that the Father has are Mine.” (John
16:15, cf. 17:10)“…the Father is in Me, and I in the Father.” (John
10:38, cf. 14:10,11,20)(We showed in full in The Apocalypse Revealed that the Lord and
His Father are one as the soul and body are one; that God the
Father descended from heaven and assumed a human form in order to
redeem and save mankind; and that His human form is what is called
the Son who was sent into the world.)
- 118. [The Lord as Father]
- 119. [The church as mother]
119. That the church is called mother is apparent from the
following passages:(Jehovah said,) “Contend with your mother…; …she is
not My wife, and I am not her Husband.” (Hosea 2:2)“You are the daughter of your mother, who loathes her
Husband….” (Ezekiel 16:45)“Where is the certificate of your mother’s divorce, whom I
have put away?” (Isaiah 50:1)Your mother was like a vine…, planted by the waters,
fruitful…. (Ezekiel 19:10)“Mother” in the those places refers to the Jewish
Church.(Jesus, stretching out His hand toward His disciples, said,)
“My mother and My brothers are they who hear the word of God
and do it.” (Luke 8:21, cf. Matthew 12:48-50, Mark 3:33-35)The church is meant by the Lord’s disciples.
By the cross of Jesus stood His mother…. (And) Jesus…seeing
His mother and the disciple whom He loved standing by, (also) said
to His mother, “Woman, behold your son!” And He said to
the disciple, “Behold your mother!” (Therefore) from
that hour the disciple took her into his own [home]. (John
19:25-27)The meaning here is that the Lord did not acknowledge Mary but
the church as His mother. That is why He calls her “woman”
and names her the mother of the disciple. He named her the mother
of this disciple, John, because John represented the church in
respect to its good acts of charity. These good acts are the
church in actual practice. Therefore it is said that the disciple
took Mary into his own [home].(We explained in The Apocalypse Revealed that Peter represented
truth and faith, James charity, and John works of charity – see
nos. 5, 6, 790, 798, 879 – and that the twelve disciples together
represented the church in all its elements – see nos. 233, 790
[798?], 903, 915.)
-
- (3) The offspring from the Lord as Husband
and Father and from the church as wife and mother are all spiritual
offspring, and this is what is meant in the spiritual sense of the
Word by sons and daughters, brothers and sisters, sons-in-law and
daughters-in-law, and by other terms which have to do with
descending generations.- 120. [Spiritual offspring]
120. (3) The offspring from the Lord as Husband and Father and
from the church as wife and mother are all spiritual offspring,
and this is what is meant in the spiritual sense of the Word by
sons and daughters, brothers and sisters, sons-in-law and
daughters-in-law, and by other terms which have to do with
descending generations. We have no need to show that spiritual
offspring are the only kind of offspring born from the Lord
through the church, because reason sees it is so without
demonstration. For the Lord is the source from which all good and
truth flow, and it is the church which receives this good and
truth and puts them into effect. Moreover, the spiritual virtues
of heaven and the church all have to do with good and truth.It is because of this that sons and daughters in the Word in
its spiritual sense mean truths and goods – sons meaning truths
conceived in a person’s spiritual self and born in the natural
self, and daughters meaning qualities of goodness similarly
conceived and born. In the Word, therefore, people who have been
regenerated by the Lord are called sons of God, sons of the
kingdom, and ones born of Him; and the Lord called the disciples
sons.The male child whom the woman bore and who was caught up to God
in the twelfth chapter of the book of Revelation (Revelation 12:5)
has the same symbolism (see The Apocalypse Revealed, no. 543).Since daughters symbolize a church’s qualities of goodness,
therefore reference is so often made in the Word to the daughter
of Zion, daughter of Jerusalem, daughter of Israel, and daughter
of Judah. By daughter in these places is not meant an actual
daughter, but an affection for good which is connected with the
church (see The Apocalypse Revealed, no. 612).The Lord also calls those people brothers and sisters who
belong to His church (Matthew 12:49, 25:40, 28:10, Mark 3:35, Luke
8:21).
- 120. [Spiritual offspring]
- (4) The spiritual offspring that are born
from the marriage of the Lord with the church are truths, from which
come understanding, perception and all thought; and also qualities
of goodness, from which come love, charity and all affection.- 121. [Understanding, perception and thought;
love, charity and affection.]121. (4) The spiritual offspring that are born from the
marriage of the Lord with the church are truths, from which come
understanding, perception and all thought; and also qualities of
goodness, from which come love, charity and all affection. The
spiritual offspring that are born from the Lord through the church
are truths and qualities of goodness, because the Lord is good
itself and truth itself (which in Him are not two but one), and
because nothing can issue from Him but what is in Him and is Him.
In the previous chapter on the marriage between good and
truth,[*1] we showed that a marriage of good and truth emanates
from the Lord and flows into people, and that it is received
according to the state of mind and life in those who belong to the
church.A person has understanding, perception and all thought as a
result of truths, and love, charity and all affection as a result
of qualities of goodness, because all the characteristics of a
human being are connected with truth and good. The two elements in
a person which make him what he is are will and understanding, and
the will is a recipient vessel of good and the understanding a
recipient vessel of truth. To show that love, charity and
affection are attributes of the will and that perception and
thought are attributes of the understanding does not require the
light of demonstration, since light on the statement is provided
by the understanding itself.[*1] See “The Origin of married love from the Marriage
between Good and Truth,” nos. 83ff.
- 121. [Understanding, perception and thought;
- (5) From the marriage of good and truth that
emanates and flows in from the Lord, a person acquires truth, to
which the Lord joins good, and in this way the church is formed in
the person by the Lord.-
- 122. [We consciously acquire truths]
122. (5) From the marriage of good and truth that emanates and
flows in from the Lord, a person acquires truth, to which the Lord
joins good, and in this way the church is formed in the person by
the Lord. A person acquires truth from the good and truth that
emanate as one from the Lord, because he receives it and
assimilates it into himself as if it were his own; for he thinks
of truth as though it originated with him, and he speaks from
truth in the same way. This comes about because truth is seen in
the light of the understanding and is therefore visible to him;
and he does not know the origin of whatever he sees inside himself
or in his mind, since he does not see it flowing in like the
phenomena that strike the vision of the eye. Consequently he
supposes that truth exists in him.This appearance has been granted to people by the Lord in order
that they may be human beings and have the means of reciprocating
necessary for conjunction.In addition, man is born with a faculty for knowing,
understanding and becoming wise, and this faculty receives truths,
by which he gains knowledge, intelligence and wisdom. And since
the female was created through the truth of the male and is formed
into a love of it more and more after marriage, it follows that
she also receives her husband’s truth into herself and joins it to
her good.
- 122. [We consciously acquire truths]
-
- 123. [The Lord invisibly gives goodness]
123. The Lord attaches and joins good to the truths a person
acquires, because a person cannot take goodness as though it
originated with him, since it is invisible to his sight. The
reason is that goodness is a matter of warmth rather than light,
and warmth is not seen but felt. Consequently, when a person sees
truth in his thinking, he rarely reflects on the good that flows
into it from the love in his will and gives it life.A wife also does not reflect on the goodness in herself, but on
her husband’s inclination toward her, which depends on the ascent
of his understanding to wisdom. She influences him with the
goodness that is in her from the Lord without the husband’s having
any awareness of that influence.From this the truth now appears, that a person acquires truth
from the Lord, and that the Lord joins good to that truth
according as the truth is put to use, thus as a person tries to
think wisely and so live wisely.
- 123. [The Lord invisibly gives goodness]
- 124. [These together are the church]
124. In this way the church is formed in the person by the
Lord, because he is then in conjunction with the Lord, being in a
state of good from the Lord and in a state of truth apparently
originating with himself. Thus the person is in the Lord and the
Lord in him, according to the Lord’s words in John 15:4,5. It is
the same if we say charity instead of good and faith instead of
truth, since good has to do with charity and truth has to do with
faith.
-
- (6) A husband does not represent the Lord
and his wife the church, because both husbands and wives together
form the church.- 125. [A husband does not represent the Lord]
125. (6) A husband does not represent the Lord and his wife the
church, because husbands and their wives both together form the
church. It is a common saying in the church that as the Lord is
the head of the church, so the husband is the head of the
wife.[*1] If this were true, it would follow that the husband
represents the Lord and the wife the church. But the truth is
that, whereas the Lord is the head of the church, people – both
men and women – are the church, and still more so husbands and
wives together.In the case of married couples, the church is implanted first
in the man, and through the man in his wife, because the man with
his understanding acquires the truth that the church teaches, and
the wife acquires it from the man. But if the reverse takes place,
it is not according to order. Nevertheless, this sometimes
happens, but only in the case of men who either are not lovers of
wisdom and so are not part of the church, or who hang like slaves
on the bidding of their wives.For something more on this subject, see the introductory
chapter, no. 21.[*1] Quoting Ephesians 5:23. Cf. 1 Corinthians 11:3.
- 125. [A husband does not represent the Lord]
- (7) Therefore neither in the marriages of
angels in heaven nor in the marriages of people on earth does the
husband correspond to the Lord and the wife to the church.- 126. [The husband does not correspond to the
Lord]126. (7) Therefore neither in the marriages of angels in heaven
nor in the marriages of people on earth does the husband
correspond to the Lord and the wife to the church. This statement
follows from what has already been said.Still, we should add that it seems as though truth is the
primary thing in the church, because it is its first concern in
time. It is because of this appearance that leaders of the church
have given the palm to faith, which has to do with truth, over
charity, which has to do with good. In similar fashion, the
learned have given the palm to thought, which has to do with the
intellect, over affection, which has to do with the will. As a
result, what the good of charity is and what the affection of the
will is lie buried in a mound of earth, so to speak, and some have
also thrown dirt on them, as though on dead men, to keep them from
rising again.The good of charity is nevertheless the primary thing in the
church, and this can be plainly seen by people who have not closed
off the way from heaven into their understanding by arguments in
support of faith as the only thing that makes the church, and in
the support of thought as the only thing that makes the man.Now because the good of charity is from the Lord, and the truth
of faith exists in a person as though it originated with him, and
because these two form the kind of conjunction of the Lord with
people and of people with the Lord meant by the Lord’s saying that
He should be in them and they in Him (John 15:4,5), it is apparent
that this conjunction is the church.
- 126. [The husband does not correspond to the
- (8) Rather, the correspondence rests with
married love, insemination, procreation, love for little children,
and other things of a similar sort that occur in marriage and result
from it.- 127. [The correspondence rests with married
love]127. (8) Rather, the correspondence rests with married love,
insemination, procreation, love for little children, and other
things of a similar sort that occur in marriage and result from
it. These secrets, however, are too deep for the understanding to
be able to take them in with any light, unless it has first gained
a concept of correspondence. Without a concept of correspondence
unveiled and present in the understanding, the topics that belong
under this heading cannot be comprehended, no matter how
explained.But what correspondence is – that it is a correspondence of
natural things with spiritual things – we have shown many times in
The Apocalypse Revealed, and also in Arcana Coelestia (The Secrets
of Heaven). We have shown it in particular as well in The Doctrine
of the New Jerusalem Regarding the Sacred Scripture; and
specifically in a narrative account on the subject later on.[*1]Until a concept of correspondence has been absorbed, for the
understanding still in darkness concerning it we will offer only
these few observations: that married love corresponds to an
affection for genuine truth and its chasteness, purity and
holiness; that insemination corresponds to the power of truth;
that procreation corresponds to the propagation of truth; and that
love for little children corresponds to the protection of truth
and good.Now because truth in a person appears as if it were his, and
good is joined to it by the Lord, it is evident that these
correspondences are correspondences of the natural or outer self
with the spiritual or inner self. But some light will be shed on
these points in the narrative accounts that follow.[*1] See perhaps no. 183, or no. 532,
or nos. 416-422. Cf. also nos. 76,
342.
- 127. [The correspondence rests with married
- (9) The Word is the means of conjunction,
because it is from the Lord and thus is the Lord.- 128. []
128. (9) The Word is the means of conjunction, because it is
from the Lord and thus is the Lord. The Word is the means by which
the Lord is conjoined with people and people with the Lord,
because it is in its essence Divine truth united to Divine good
and Divine good united to Divine truth. (On the presence of this
union in each and every part of the Word in its celestial and
spiritual meanings, see The Apocalypse Revealed, nos. 373, 483,
689, 881.)It follows from this that the Word is a perfect marriage of
good and truth. And because it is from the Lord, and because that
which is from Him also is Him, it follows as a consequence that
when a person reads the Word and draws truths from it, the Lord
attaches good. For the person does not see the states of good
affecting him, because he uses his intellect to read the Word, and
the intellect takes in from the Word only what is proper to it,
namely, truths.The intellect does have a sense that the Lord joins good to
these truths, from the delight that flows in when it is in a state
of enlightenment, but this takes place inwardly only in the case
of people who read the Word for the purpose of gaining wisdom, and
those have this purpose who are trying to learn genuine truths
from it and thereby form the church in themselves.In contrast, people who read the Word only for the glory in
being learned, and people who suppose that simply the reading or
hearing of the Word inspires faith and leads to salvation – such
people do not receive any good from the Lord. That is because the
goal of the second sort of people is to save themselves by just
the mere sayings in the Word, apart from the presence of any truth
in them; and the goal of the first sort of people is to become
renowned for their learning, a goal which does not have any
spiritual good attached to it but only natural delight arising
from the glory of the world.Since the Word is the means of conjunction, it is therefore
called a covenant – the Old Covenant and the New Covenant. A
covenant symbolizes conjunction.
- 128. []
- (10) The church comes from the Lord and it
exists in people who go to Him and live according to His
commandments.- 129. [The church comes from the Lord]
129. (10) The church comes from the Lord and it exists in
people who go to Him and live according to His commandments. No
one at the present day denies that the church is the Lord’s, and
that because it is the Lord’s, it is from the Lord.It exists in people who go to Him, because the Lord’s church in
the Christian world is founded on the Word, and the Word is from
Him and from Him in such a way that it is Him. The Word contains
Divine truth united to Divine good, and this also is the Lord.
This is precisely what is meant by the Word which was with God and
which was God, from which men have life and light, and which
became flesh (John 1:1-14).Moreover, the church exists in people who go to the Lord for
the further reason that it exists in those who believe in Him. And
no one can believe that He is God the Savior and Redeemer, Jehovah
who is Righteousness,[*1] the door by which one must enter the
sheepfold (that is to say, the church),[*2] the way, the truth and
the life, that no one comes to the Father except through Him,[*3]
that the Father and He are one,[*4] besides many other things that
the Lord Himself teaches – no one, I say, can believe these things
unless he gets his belief from the Lord. No one can believe these
things without going to the Lord, because He is God of heaven and
earth, as He Himself also teaches.[*5] Who else should one go to?
Who else can one go to?The church exists in people who live according to the Lord’s
commandments, because they alone have conjunction with Him. For
the Lord says:He who has My commandments and obeys them, it is he who loves
Me….and I will love him….and (I will) make an abode with him.
(But) he who does not love Me does not keep My (commandments)….
(John 14:21-24)Love is what conjoins, and conjunction with the Lord is the
church.[*1] See Jeremiah 23:5,6, 33:15,16, 1 Corinthians 1:30.
[*2] John 10:1,7,9.
[*3] John 14:6.
[*4] John 10:30, 17:11,22, cf. 8:19, 12:45, 14:7-9.
[*5] Matthew 28:18.
- 129. [The church comes from the Lord]
- (11) Married love depends on the state of
the church in a person, because it depends on the state of his
wisdom.- 130. [Married love depends on the state of
the church in a person]130. (11) Married love depends on the state of the church in a
person, because it depends on the state of his wisdom. We have
said several times before that married love depends on the state
of wisdom in a person, and we will be saying it several times
again after this. We will explain here, therefore, what wisdom is,
and show that it is inseparably bound up with the church.People are capable of knowledge, intelligence and wisdom.
Knowledge has to do with concepts, intelligence with reason, and
wisdom with life.Regarded in its fullness, wisdom has to do with concepts,
reason and life at the same time. Concepts come first; reason is
formed by means of them, and wisdom by both concepts and reason
together – and this when a person lives reasonably or rationally
according to truths formed as concepts.Wisdom, therefore, has to do with both reason and life
together. It is on the way to becoming wisdom when it is a matter
of reason first and consequently of life; but it is wisdom when it
has become a matter of life first and consequently of reason.The most ancient people in this world did not acknowledge any
other wisdom than wisdom of life. This was the wisdom of those who
were formerly called sages. The ancients, however, who came after
those most ancient people, recognized as wisdom a wisdom of
reason, and they were called philosophers. But today, many even
call knowledge wisdom, for the educated, the learned, and the
merely knowledgeable are called wise. Thus has wisdom fallen from
its peak to its valley.[2] Nevertheless, something must also be said respecting what
wisdom is in its rise, progress, and then full state.Concerns that have to do with the church and are called
spiritual have their seat in the inmost recesses in a person.
Concerns that have to do with the civil state and are called
political occupy a position below them. And concerns that have to
do with knowledge, experience and skill and are called natural –
these form their footstool.Concerns that have to do with the church and are called
spiritual have their seat in the inmost recesses in a person,
because they are connected with heaven and through heaven with the
Lord. For it is just these concerns that enter a person from the
Lord through heaven.Concerns that have to do with the civil state and are called
political occupy a position below spiritual matters, because they
are connected with the world, since they have to do with the
world. For they are the statutes, laws and regulations by which
men are bound, in order that they may be formed into a stable and
united society and state.Concerns that have to do with knowledge, experience and skill
and are called natural – these form the footstool, because they
are closely connected with the five senses of the body, and the
senses are the lowest elements, on which rest, so to speak, the
interior elements that have to do with the mind and the inmost
elements that have to do with the soul.[3] Now because concerns that have to do with the church and
are called spiritual have their seat in the inmost regions, and
whatever has its seat in the inmost regions forms the head, and
because the concerns that follow next below them, which are called
political, form the body, and the lowest concerns which are called
natural form the feet, it follows that when these three come one
after the other in their proper order, a person is a proper human
being. For one level then flows down into the next, in a manner
similar to the way activities of the head flow down into the body
and through the body to the feet. So do spiritual concerns flow
down into political concerns, and through political concerns into
natural ones.Furthermore, because spiritual concerns reside in the light of
heaven, it is apparent that they illumine with their light the
concerns that follow in order, and animate them with their warmth
(which is love), and that when this happens, a person has wisdom.[4] Since wisdom is, as we said above, a matter of life first
and consequently of reason, the question arises, what wisdom of
life is. In brief summary, it is this: to refrain from evils
because they are harmful to the soul, harmful to the civil state,
and harmful to the body, and to do good things because they are of
benefit to the soul, to the civil state, and to the body.This is the wisdom that is meant by the wisdom to which married
love attaches itself. For it attaches itself through wisdom’s
shunning the evil of adultery as a pestilence injurious to the
soul, to the civil state, and to the body. And because this wisdom
springs from spiritual concerns which have to do with the church,
it follows that married love depends on the state of the church in
a person, because it depends on the state of his wisdom. This also
means, as we have frequently said before, that a person is in a
state of true married love to the degree that he becomes
spiritual. For a person becomes spiritual through the spiritual
things of the church.More on the wisdom to which married love joins itself may be
seen below in nos. 163, 164,
and 165.
- 130. [Married love depends on the state of
- (12) So, then, because the church comes from
the Lord, married love comes from Him as well.- 131. [Married love comes from the Lord]
131. (12) So, then, because the church comes from the Lord,
married love comes from Him as well. Because this follows as a
consequence from what we have already said, I refrain from
confirming it further. Besides, the angels of heaven all testify
that true married love comes from the Lord; and they testify also
that this love depends on the state of their wisdom, and that the
state of their wisdom depends on the state of the church in them.
That angels of heaven testify to these points is apparent from the
narrative accounts at the end of the chapters, which are things I
saw and heard in the spiritual world.
- 131. [Married love comes from the Lord]
- What the image and likeness of God are, and
what the tree of life and the tree of the knowledge of good and evil
are (nos. 132-136).-
- 132. [What is the image and likeness of God?]
132. To this I will append two narrative accounts. Here is the
first:I was once speaking with two angels. One was from an eastern
heaven, the other from a heaven in the south. When they perceived
that I was pondering secrets of wisdom relating to married love,
they said, “Do you know about schools of wisdom in our
world?”I replied that I did not yet.
They said, “There are many.” And they described how
people who love truths with a spiritual affection, or who love
them because they are true and because wisdom is gained by means
of them, at a specified signal come together to discuss and draw
conclusions on matters requiring a deeper understanding.Then they took me by the hand, saying, “Follow us and you
will see and hear for yourself. The signal has been given for a
meeting today.”I was taken through a flat stretch of country to a hill, and
behold, at the foot of the hill was an avenue of palm trees that
extended all the way up to the top. We entered the avenue and
ascended. At the top or apex of the hill we then saw a grove whose
trees grew round about on a rise of ground and formed a kind of
theater, with a level area in the middle covered with variously
colored stones. Chairs had been placed around this space in the
shape of a square, where the lovers of wisdom were already seated.
Moreover, in the center of the theater stood a table, on which a
piece of paper had been placed, sealed with a seal.[2] The people sitting on the chairs invited us to seats that
were still empty. But I replied, “I was brought here by the
two angels to observe and listen, not to participate.”The two angels then went to the table in the middle of the
level area; and undoing the seal on the piece of paper, they stood
before the people seated and read them the secrets of wisdom
written on the paper, which the people were now to discuss and
explain. (The topics had been written by angels of the third
heaven and sent down to their place on the table.)There were three secrets to be explained. First, what the image
of God is and the likeness of God into which man was created.
Secondly, why man does not come by birth into the knowledge
necessary to any love, whereas both higher and lower animals and
birds come by birth into the kinds of knowledge necessary to all
their loves. Thirdly, what the tree of life symbolizes and the
tree of the knowledge of good and evil, and what eating from them
means.Underneath, the added instruction had been written, “Combine
the three explanations into a single statement and write it on a
new piece of paper, then place it back on the table and we will
look at it. If the statement seems balanced and accurate, each of
you will be given an award for wisdom.”After they read this, the two angels withdrew and were taken up
into their respective heavens.[3] Then the people sitting on the chairs began to discuss and
explain the secrets of the questions put before them, speaking in
turn, beginning with those who sat towards the north, then those
towards the west, afterwards those towards the south, and finally
those towards the east. They started by taking up the first topic
for discussion, namely, what the image of God is and the likeness
of God into which man was created. First of all, they had the
following verses read aloud from the book of creation for everyone
to hear:…God said, “Let us make man in our image, according to
our likeness….” So God created man in His own image; in the
image of God He created him. (Genesis 1:26,27)In the day that God created man, He made him in the likeness of
God. (Genesis 5:1)The people who were sitting towards the north spoke first,
saying that the image of God and the likeness of God are two kinds
of life breathed into man by God, these being the life of the will
and the life of the understanding. For we read, they said, the
following statement:…Jehovah God…breathed into (Adam’ s) nostrils the breath of
lives; and man became a living creature. (Genesis 2:7)“Into the nostrils,” they said, “means into a
perception that a will of good and an understanding of truth were
in him, and thus that he had “the breath of lives.” And
because life was breathed into him by God, the image and likeness
of God symbolize integrity resulting from wisdom and love and from
righteousness and judgment in him.”Those who were sitting towards the west expressed agreement
with this view, only adding that that state of integrity inspired
by God into the first man is continually being breathed into every
person after him, but that it exists in a person as though in a
recipient vessel, and a person is therefore an image and likeness
of God to the extent that he is such a recipient vessel.[4] Next, the people third in order, who were those who were
sitting towards the south, said, “The image of God and the
likeness of God are two distinct things, but they were united in
man at his creation. Moreover, from a kind of inner light we see
that the image of God can be destroyed by a person, but not the
likeness of God. This appears by inference from the suggestion
that Adam retained the likeness of God after he had lost the image
of God, for we read, after the curse, this statement:“Behold, the man is like one of us, knowing good and
evil.” (Genesis 3:22)And later he is called a likeness of God, and not an image of
God (Genesis 5:1).“But let us leave it for our colleagues who are sitting
towards the east and who are therefore in a higher light to say
precisely what the image of God is, and what the likeness of God
is.”[5] So then, after waiting for silence, the people sitting
towards the east rose from their chairs and looked up to the Lord.
And when they had taken their seats again, they said that the
image of God is the capacity to receive God, and because God is
love itself and wisdom itself, the image of God in a person is the
capacity to receive love and wisdom from God.On the other hand, the likeness of God, they said, is the
perfect semblance and complete appearance that love and wisdom are
in a person, and this entirely as though they belonged to him.
“For a person has no other sensation than that he feels love
on his own and becomes wise on his own, or that he wills good and
understands truth by himself, even though not the least bit of it
originates from him but from God. God alone loves from within
Himself and is wise from within Himself, because God alone is love
itself and wisdom itself.“Love and wisdom, or good and truth, seem to be in a
person as though they belonged to him, because this semblance or
appearance makes him a human being and causes him to be capable of
being conjoined with God and so of living to eternity. It follows
from this that a person is a human being as a result of his
ability to will good and understand truth entirely as though on
his own, and yet to know and believe that he does so from God. For
God sets His image in a person to the extent that he knows and
believes this. It would be different if he were to believe that he
had that ability from himself and not from God.”[6] As the speakers said this, a zeal came over them from their
love of truth, prompting them to continue.“How,” they went on, “can a person receive any
measure of love and wisdom so as to be able to retain it and
reproduce it, unless he feels it as belonging to him? And how can
there be any conjunction with God by means of love and wisdom
unless man has been given some way of reciprocating necessary for
conjunction? For no conjunction is possible without reciprocation.
The reciprocation required for conjunction is a person’s loving
God and being wise in matters relating to God as though on his
own, and yet believing that it is from God. Furthermore, unless a
person has been conjoined to the eternal God, how is it possible
for him to live to eternity? Consequently, how can a person be a
human being without having that likeness of God in him?”[7] On hearing this explanation, the rest all expressed their
agreement, and they proposed that a conclusion be drawn on the
basis of it, formulated in the following statement:“Man is a vessel recipient of God,” they said, “and
a vessel recipient of God is an image of God. Since God is love
itself and wisdom itself, man is a vessel recipient of these. And
as a recipient vessel, a person becomes an image of God to the
extent that he receives.“Moreover, man is a likeness of God because of his sensing
in himself that the things he has from God are in him as though
they belonged to him. But still, a person is an image of God as a
result of that likeness only in the measure that he acknowledges
that the love and wisdom or good and truth in him are not his and
so do not originate from him, but are God’s alone and so originate
from God.”
- 132. [What is the image and likeness of God?]
-
- 133. [We are born in ignorance]
133. After this they took up the second topic for discussion,
why man does not come by birth into the knowledge necessary to any
love, whereas both higher and lower animals and birds come by
birth into the kinds of knowledge necessary to all their loves.First they confirmed the truth of the proposed question by
various considerations. With respect to man, for example, they
observed that the human being does not come by birth into any
knowledge, not even into knowledge relating to married love.They inquired as well and learned from investigators that an
infant does not even possess the instinctive knowledge to be able
to go to its mother’s breast, but it must be placed in contact
with it by the mother or nurse. It only knows how to suckle, and
it got this from a continual sucking in the womb. The infant
afterwards also does not know how to walk, the investigators said,
nor how to articulate sound to form a single human word. Indeed,
it does not even know how to voice the affection of its love as
animals do. Moreover, it does not know any source of food that is
good for it, either, as all animals do, but clutches at whatever
it comes upon, whether it is clean or unclean, and puts it into
its mouth.Without being taught, the investigators said, the human being
does not even know enough to distinguish the opposite sex, and
nothing at all about how to make love to one. Even young men and
women do not know how to make love without learning about it from
others, even if they have been educated in the various arts and
sciences.In a word, the human being is born flesh, like a worm, and
remains flesh unless he learns to acquire knowledge, intelligence
and wisdom from others.[2] Next, with respect to animals, such as beasts of the earth,
birds of the sky, creeping things, fish, and little creatures
called insects, the people confirmed that both higher and lower
animals come by birth into all the kinds of knowledge necessary to
their life’s loves. They come, for example, into knowledge of all
things having to do with their proper diet, with their place of
habitation, with their mating and reproduction, and with the
rearing of their young.The people confirmed these observations with marvelous
illustrations that they recalled to memory from things they had
seen, heard or read about in the natural world (as they termed our
world in which they had formerly lived), where animals are not
representational but real.After they had thus verified the truth of the proposed
question, the people turned their attention to investigating and
finding the ends and causes by which to explain and uncover the
answer to this mystery. And they all said that this state of
affairs must result from Divine wisdom, that a human being may be
a human being, and an animal an animal; and that therefore man’s
imperfection from birth becomes his perfection, while an animal’s
perfection from birth is its imperfection.
- 133. [We are born in ignorance]
-
- 134. [Why ignorance?]
134. The people on the north side were then the first to begin
to present their opinion. And they said that man is by birth
without knowledge of any kind in order that he may be capable of
acquiring all types of knowledge. If he were to come into various
kinds of knowledge by birth, however, he would not be capable of
acquiring any beyond those into which he came by birth, and in
that case, neither would he be capable of making any personally
his own.They illustrated this by the following comparison. “When a
person is first born,” they said, “he is like ground in
which no seeds have been planted, but which is yet capable of
accepting all kinds of seeds and germinating them and bringing
them to fruit. An animal, on the other hand, is like ground
already sown and filled with grasses and plants, which does not
accept any other seeds than the ones it has. If others should be
sown, it would suffocate them.“That is why it takes a number of years for a human being
to grow to maturity, years in which he can be like ground
undergoing cultivation, and sprouting, so to speak, all kinds of
grain, flowers and trees. An animal develops in only a few years,
however, during which time it can be cultivated only into
producing what it was born with.”[2] The people on the west side spoke next, and they said that
man is not born with knowledge, as animals are, but is born with a
capacity and inclination – a capacity for learning and an
inclination to love. Moreover, they said, he is born with a
capacity not only for learning, but also for understanding and
becoming wise. So, too, he is born with a most perfect
inclination, not only to love things having to do with self and
the world, but also things having to do with God and heaven.Consequently, they said, a person by birth and heredity is an
organism which lives only on the level of the external senses, and
not at first on the level of any higher sense, in order that he
may develop by stages into a human being, becoming first natural,
then rational, and finally spiritual. This would not happen if he
came by birth into various kinds of knowledge and loves as animals
do. “For inborn patterns of knowledge and affection limit
that progression,” they said, “whereas an inborn
capacity and inclination do not. A person can therefore be
perfected in knowledge, understanding and wisdom to eternity.”[3] The people on the south side took up the discussion and
added their voice, saying that it is impossible for a person to
acquire any knowledge on his own, but he must get it from others,
since no knowledge is inborn in him.“Moreover, because he cannot acquire any knowledge on his
own,” they said, “neither can he acquire any love, since
there is no love where there is no knowledge. Knowledge and love
are inseparable companions, and they cannot be divided any more
than will and understanding or affection and thought – indeed, any
more than essence and form. As a person acquires knowledge from
others, therefore, so love attaches itself as its companion. The
universal love that attaches itself is a love of learning,
understanding, and becoming wise. Only man has this love and no
animal, and it flows in from God.[4] “We agree with our companions on the west that man
does not come by birth into any love and so neither into any
knowledge, but that he comes by birth solely into an inclination
to love and so into a capacity for acquiring knowledge, not on his
own but from others, or rather, through others. We say, through
others, because they, too, did not acquire any knowledge on their
own but from God.“We agree also with our companions to the north that when
a person is first born, he is like ground in which no seeds have
been planted, but in which all kinds of seeds can be planted, both
good and bad. To this we add that animals come by birth into
natural loves and therefore into forms of knowledge corresponding
to those loves, and yet they do not learn anything from their
kinds of knowledge or develop thought, intelligence and wisdom on
the basis of them. Instead they are carried along in them by their
loves, almost like blind men being led through the streets by
dogs. For in terms of their understanding, they are blind. Or
better still, they are like sleepwalkers, who do what they do out
of blind knowledge while the understanding sleeps.”[5] Lastly the people on the east side spoke, saying, “We
concur with what our brothers have said. A person of himself knows
nothing but must learn from others and through others, in order
that he may know and acknowledge that all his knowledge,
understanding and wisdom are from God.“Only in this way,” they said, “can a person be
conceived, born and brought forth by the Lord so as to become an
image and likeness of Him. For a person becomes an image of the
Lord by his acknowledging and believing that he has acquired and
continues to acquire every good of love and charity and every
truth of wisdom and faith from the Lord, and not the least bit
from himself. And he becomes a likeness of the Lord by his feeling
these things in himself as though they originated with him. He has
this feeling because he does not come by birth into various kinds
of knowledge, but acquires them, and what he acquires appears to
him as though it originated with him.“A person is also given to feel this way by the Lord, in
order that he may be a human being and not an animal, because his
willing, thinking, loving, learning, understanding and becoming
wise seemingly on his own is what leads him to acquire various
kinds of knowledge, to develop them into intelligence, and by
applying them turn them into wisdom. In this way the Lord joins
the person to Himself, and the person joins himself to the Lord.
This would not have been possible if the Lord had not provided
that man be born in a state of total ignorance.”[6] After these remarks, the people were all ready to reach a
conclusion from the matters discussed, and they formed the
following statement:“Man does not come by birth into any knowledge,” they
said, “in order that he may come into every kind of knowledge
and so progress into a state of intelligence and through this into
wisdom. So, too, he does not come by birth into any love, in order
that by applying various kinds of knowledge with intelligence he
may come into every kind of love, and through love for the
neighbor come into love towards the Lord; and this to the end that
he may be thus conjoined with the Lord and by that conjunction
become human and live to eternity.”
- 134. [Why ignorance?]
-
- 135. [What are the tree of life and the tree
of knowledge?]135. After this they took the piece of paper and read the third
topic for discussion, namely, what the tree of life symbolizes,
what the tree of the knowledge of good and evil symbolizes, and
what eating from them means. And they all asked the people on the
east to explain this mystery, because it required a deeper
understanding, and people who come from the east have a flaming
light, that is to say, a wisdom that comes of love, which is the
wisdom meant by the garden in Eden in which the two trees were
placed.The people on the east, then, replied, “We will speak. But
because no one acquires anything from himself but from the Lord,
we will speak from Him, though it will still seem to come from us
as though it originated with us.”Then they said, “A tree symbolizes a person; and its
fruit, goodness of life. The tree of life therefore symbolizes a
person living from God, or God living in the person. And because
love and wisdom and charity and faith or good and truth constitute
the life of God in a person, the tree of life symbolizes these
qualities, from which a person has eternal life. The tree of life
which people will be given to eat from, in the book of Revelation,
has a similar symbolism (Revelation 2:7, 22:2,14).[2] “The tree of the knowledge of good and evil symbolizes
a person believing that he lives on his own and not from God, thus
that the love and wisdom, charity and faith, or good and truth in
the person are his and not God’s – believing this because he
thinks and wills, and speaks and acts, in all likeness and
appearance as if on his own. Because a person with this belief
comes into the persuasion that God has introduced Himself or
infused His Divinity into him, therefore the serpent said:…God knows that in the day you eat (of the fruit of the tree)
your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good
and evil. (Genesis 3:5)[3] “Eating from the two trees symbolizes acquisition and
assimilation. Eating from the tree of life symbolizes acquisition
of eternal life, and eating from the tree of the knowledge of good
and evil symbolizes acquisition of damnation. Therefore Adam and
his wife were both cursed along with the serpent. The serpent
means the devil in respect to self-love and pride in its own
intelligence. This love takes possession of the tree, and people
who are caught up in pride as a result of that love are the trees
it possesses.“People fall into an enormous error, therefore, who
believe that Adam was wise and did good from his own nature, and
that this was his state of integrity, when Adam himself was cursed
for precisely that belief. For this is what is symbolized by his
eating from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. That was
why he then fell from his state of integrity, which he had had as
a result of his believing that he was wise and did good from God
and not from himself, for that is what is meant by his eating from
the tree of life.“The Lord alone, when He was in the world, was wise of
Himself and did good of Himself, because the Divine itself was in
Him and was His from birth. Consequently He also became Redeemer
and Savior by His own power.”[4] On the basis of these remarks and explanations, the people
formed the following conclusion:“The tree of life, the tree of the knowledge of good and
evil, and eating from them,” they said, “symbolize that
the source of life for man is to have God in him, and that he then
gains heaven and eternal life. On the other hand, the source of
death for man is the persuasion and belief that the source of life
for man is not God but himself, on which account he gains hell and
eternal death, which is damnation.”
- 135. [What are the tree of life and the tree
- 136. [Summary]
136. After this the people looked at the piece of paper which
the angels had left on the table, and they saw the added
instruction written at the end, “Combine the three
explanations into a single statement.” They then brought
their three conclusions together and saw that they formed a single
connected series, and that the series or final statement was this:“Man was created to receive love and wisdom from God, and
yet to receive them to all appearances as though they originated
from himself, in order that he might be capable of reception and
conjunction. Man therefore does not come by birth into any love or
into any knowledge, neither does he come into any power to love
and become wise from himself. Consequently, if he attributes every
good of love and every truth of wisdom to God, he becomes a man
with life in him. But if he attributes them to himself, he becomes
a man without life.”The people then wrote this statement on a new piece of paper
and placed it on the table. And behold, suddenly angels appeared
in a bright white light and took the paper away into heaven.After their statement had been read in heaven, the people
sitting on the chairs heard voices from heaven saying, “Good,
good, good.” And instantly they caught sight of an angel
apparently flying from that direction, with a pair of wings about
his feet and another pair about his temples, carrying their awards
in his hand. The awards were robes, caps, and laurel wreaths.The angel descended, and to the people who were sitting towards
the north he gave opal-colored robes. To those sitting towards the
west he gave scarlet-colored robes. To those sitting towards the
south he gave caps, the borders of which were decorated with
strips of gold and pearls, with elevations on the left side
adorned with diamonds cut in the form of flowers. And to those
sitting towards the east he gave laurel wreaths set with rubies
and sapphires.The people left the school of wisdom and headed home all decked
out in these awards, but though they meant to show themselves off
to their wives, their wives came to meet them also arrayed in
beautiful gifts from heaven, which the men marveled at.
-
- Two angels from the third heaven on married
love there (no. 137).- 137. [Married love in the highest heaven]
137. The second account:
While I was once thinking about married love, I suddenly caught
sight of two naked little children in the distance, with baskets
in their hands and turtledoves flying around them. Then, as they
came closer, they looked like naked little children modestly
decked out in garlands of flowers. Their heads were decorated with
little chaplets of flowers, and their breasts were adorned with
sash-like wreathes of blue-colored lilies and roses that hung
diagonally from their shoulders to their hips. And round about the
two of them appeared what looked like a shared chain of little
leaves woven together and interspersed with olives.When they drew nearer still, however, they did not appear as
little children or naked, but as two adults in the bloom of their
early youth, dressed in robes and tunics of shining silk, with
beautiful-looking flowers woven into them. Moreover, when they
stood next to me, a springlike warmth wafted down from heaven
through them with a sweet-scented fragrance, like the fragrance of
first growth in gardens and fields.The two were a married couple from heaven, and they then spoke
to me. And because I was still thinking about the things I had
just seen, they asked, “What did you see?”[2] So I told them how they had first appeared to me as naked
little children, then as little children decked out in garlands,
and finally as people more grown up, dressed in garments decorated
with flowers. I also told them how an atmosphere of spring had
then instantly wafted over me with its delights.They laughed pleasantly at this and said that on the way they
had not appeared to themselves as little children or naked or
wearing garlands, but the whole time had looked the same as they
did now. Their appearing as they had at a distance, they said,
represented their married love, its state of innocence being
represented by their appearing as naked little children, its
delights by the garlands, and these same delights now by the
flowers woven into their robes and tunics.“And,” they continued, “because you said that as
we approached, a springlike warmth wafted over you with its
pleasant aromas, like those from a garden, we will tell you why
this was.[3] “We have been married for centuries now,” they
said, “and we have remained continually in this bloom of
youth in which you see us.“At first our state was similar to the initial state of a
maiden and youth when they first come together in marriage.
Moreover, we believed at the time that that state was the most
blissful state we could experience in life. But we were told by
others in our heaven, and we afterwards perceived for ourselves,
that it was a state of heat not yet tempered with light. We found
that it is gradually tempered as the husband is perfected in
wisdom and as the wife grows to love that wisdom in her husband,
which is achieved through and according to the useful services
which each of them performs in society with the other’s help. We
also found that new delights then follow as heat and light or
wisdom and its accompanying love are tempered each with the other.[4] “A seemingly springlike warmth wafted over you when we
approached because in our heaven married love and that warmth go
hand in hand. For with us, warmth is love, and light with warmth
joined to it is wisdom, and useful service is like an atmosphere
which holds both in its embrace. What are heat and light without
their containing medium? So likewise, what are love and wisdom
without their expression in useful service? Without expression in
useful service, there is no bond of marriage between the two,
because the objective reality in which they exist is lacking.“In heaven, one finds true married love wherever there is
a springlike warmth. One finds true married love there because a
springlike climate occurs only where warmth is joined to light in
an even balance, or where there is as much warmth as there is
light and vice versa. And we like to think that as warmth works
its pleasure when accompanied by light and conversely light when
accompanied by warmth, so love works its pleasure when accompanied
by wisdom and conversely wisdom when accompanied by love.”[5] With us in heaven, the man said further, the light is
constant, and we never experience the dusk of evening, still less
darkness, because our sun does not rise and set like your sun but
stands continually midway between a point overhead and the
horizon, or as you would say, at an elevation of 45 degrees.“That is why,” he said, “the heat and light
emanating from our sun result in perpetual spring, and this
inspires a perpetual springlike state in those in whom love is
united in even measure with wisdom.“Through the eternal union of heat and light, moreover,
our Lord inspires nothing that is not productive and useful. That,
too, is why the sproutings of plants on your earth and the matings
of your birds and animals take place in springtime. For the warmth
of spring opens up their inner capabilities even to the inmost
forces which are called their souls, stirring them, and imparting
to them its own inclination to unite, and causing their
reproductive instinct to come into its delight from a continual
effort to produce fruits of use, which is the propagation of their
kind.[6] “In the case of human beings, however, there is a
never-ending influx of springlike warmth from the Lord.
Consequently they can experience the delights of marriage in any
season, even in the middle of winter. For men were created to be
receivers of light from the Lord, meaning the light of wisdom, and
women were created to be receivers of warmth from the Lord,
meaning the warmth of love for the wisdom in a man.“That now is why as we approached a springlike warmth
wafted over you with a sweet-scented fragrance, like the fragrance
of first growth in gardens and fields.”[7] Having said this, the man gave me his right hand and took
me to houses where married couples lived in the same flower of
youth in which they were. And he told me that the wives, who now
looked like young girls, had once been wrinkled old ladies in the
world, and that the husbands, who now looked like adolescent
youths, had once been decrepit old men there. They have all been
returned by the Lord to the bloom of this youthful age, he said,
because they loved each other and out of religion abstained from
adulterous affairs as enormous sins.He added as well that only those people know the blissful
delights of married love who reject the horrible delights of
adultery. And no one can reject these except one who is wise from
the Lord, and no one is wise from the Lord unless he performs
useful services from a love of doing them.I also caught sight then of the implements in their houses.
These were all in heavenly forms, and they shone of gold that was
practically ablaze with intermingled rubies.
- 137. [Married love in the highest heaven]
-
- 138. CHASTITY AND ITS ABSENCE
-
- 138. [CHASTITY AND ITS ABSENCE]
[We take up chastity and its absence here,] since I am still on
the way to dealing with married love in particular, and because
married love in particular can be known only indistinctly and thus
dimly unless its opposite is also seen to some degree. Its opposite
is unchasteness, and this is seen to some degree, or some shadow of
it, when chastity is described along with its absence. For chastity
is simply the removal of unchasteness from that which is chaste.
Unchasteness, on the other hand, which is the complete opposite of
chastity, is discussed in the second part of this work, where it
will be described in its full scope and in its varieties under the
title, PLEASURES OF INSANITY RELATING TO LICENTIOUS LOVE.Meanwhile, what chastity is and its absence, and who they apply
to, will be made clear according to the following outline:(1) Chastity and a lack of chastity are terms that apply only to
states of marriage and things that have to do with marriage.(2) Chastity is ascribed only to monogamous marriages, or to
marriages of one man with one wife.(3) Only a Christian marital relationship is chaste.
(4) True married love is the essence of chastity.
(5) All the delights of true married love, even the end
delights, are chaste.(6) Married love is more and more purified and becomes chaste in
people who become spiritual from the Lord.(7) Chastity in marriage comes about through total renunciation
of licentious relationships in accordance with religion.(8) Chastity cannot be ascribed to little children or boys and
girls, nor to adolescents of either sex before they feel a love for
the opposite sex stirring in them.(9) Chastity cannot be ascribed to people who are born eunuchs
or who have been made eunuchs.(10) Chastity cannot be ascribed to people who do not believe
that adultery is an evil against religion, and still less to those
who do not believe that adultery is harmful to society.(11) Chastity cannot be ascribed to people who abstain from
adulterous relationships only for various external reasons.(12) Chastity cannot be ascribed to people who believe that
marriages are unchaste.(13) Chastity cannot be ascribed to people who have renounced
marriage by a vow of perpetual celibacy, unless a love for the
truly married life is present and remains in them.(14) The state of marriage is preferable to a state of celibacy.
Explanation of these statements now follows.
- 138. [CHASTITY AND ITS ABSENCE]
- (1) Chastity and a lack of chastity are
terms that apply only to states of marriage and things that have to
do with marriage.-
- 139. [Chastity refers to marriage]
139. (1) Chastity and a lack of chastity are terms that apply
to states of marriage and things that have to do with marriage.
This is because true married love is the essence of chastity, as
shown below. And the love opposite to it, which we call
licentious, is the essence of unchasteness. In the measure,
therefore, that married love is purified of unchasteness, in the
same measure married love is chaste, for in that measure the
opposite that destroys it is taken away.It is apparent from this that what we mean by chastity is the
purity of married love.There is also married love in which chastity is absent, which
is nevertheless not unchaste – such as exists between partners who
for various external reasons abstain from outward expressions of
lasciviousness even to the point that they do not think about
them. Nevertheless, if that love is not purified in their spirits,
it is still not chaste. It has an outward form that is chaste, but
its inward essence is not chaste.
- 139. [Chastity refers to marriage]
- 140. [It affects the whole person]
140. Chastity and a lack of chastity are terms that apply only
to things that have to do with marriage, because the conjugal
impulse is engraved on each sex from the inmost elements to the
outmost, and it determines accordingly what a person is in his
thoughts and affections, consequently what he is inwardly in
respect to the behavior and actions of his body.The truth of this is quite evident from people who are
unchaste. The unchasteness inherent in their minds is heard in the
sound of their speech and in the appeal to libidinous thoughts in
everything they say, even when chastely put. The sound of their
speech comes from the affection of their will, and their speech
comes from the thought of their intellect. It is a sign that the
will with all its qualities and the understanding with all its
qualities, in other words, the whole mind, and therefore all the
elements of the body – from the inmost elements to the outmost –
are overflowing with unchaste desires.I have been told by angels that the unchasteness in most
accomplished hypocrites is perceived on hearing them, however
chastely they may speak, and is also felt from the atmosphere
exuding from them. This, too, is a sign that unchasteness resides
in the inmost elements of their minds and therefore in the inmost
elements of their bodies, and that these things are covered over
outwardly, like a nutshell painted with various kinds of colors.That an aura of lasciviousness exudes from unchaste people is
apparent from the statutes among the children of Israel declaring
that each and every thing which people defiled by unclean things
simply touched with their hands was rendered unclean.One may conclude from this that it is the same with chaste
people, namely, that each and every thing in them is chaste, from
the inmost elements to the outmost. Also that the chastity of
married love is responsible for this.That is why it is said in the world that to the clean all
things are clean, and to the unclean all things are unclean.[*1][*1] From Titus 1:15.
-
- (2) Chastity is ascribed only to monogamous
marriages, or to marriages of one man with one wife.- 141. [Only monogamous marriages]
141. (2) Chastity is ascribed only to monogamous marriages, or
to marriages of one man with one wife. Chastity is ascribed only
to such marriages because married love in these marriages does not
lie in the natural self, but enters into the spiritual self and
gradually opens its way to the real spiritual marriage, which is a
marriage of good and truth. This marriage is the origin of the
love, and it forms a bond with it. For such a love enters as
wisdom increases, and this takes place as the church is implanted
by the Lord, as we have shown many times before.This cannot happen in the case of polygamists, since they
divide married love, and when this love is a divided one it is not
much different from promiscuous love, which in itself is a natural
love. But on this subject, some important points will be seen in
the chapter on polygamy.[*1][*1] See nos. 332ff.
- 141. [Only monogamous marriages]
- (3) Only a Christian marital relationship is
chaste.- 142. [Only Christian marriages]
142. (3) Only a Christian marital relationship is chaste. This
is because true married love advances in a person in the same
degree as the state of the church in him and because that love is
from the Lord (as we showed in the preceding chapter, nos. 130,
131, and elsewhere). Furthermore, a church in
possession of its genuine truths is a church that possesses the
Word, and it is there in those truths that the Lord is present.It follows from this that a chaste marital relationship does
not exist except in the Christian world, and if it does not exist,
that still it is possible. By a Christian marital relationship we
mean a marriage of one man with one wife. We will see in its own
place[*1] that this conjugal state can become implanted in
Christians, and that it can be passed on hereditarily to offspring
by parents who are in a state of true married love. We will see
also that from it is born at the same time both a capacity and an
inclination to become wise in things that have to do with the
church and heaven.If Christians marry more than one wife, they commit not only
natural adultery but spiritual adultery as well, as we will show
in the chapter on polygamy.[*2][*1] See nos. 202ff.
[*2] See nos. 332ff.
- 142. [Only Christian marriages]
- (4) True married love is the essence of
chastity.- 143. [True married love is real chastity]
143. (4) True married love is the essence of chastity. The
reasons for this are as follows:1. Married love is from the Lord, and it corresponds to the
marriage of the Lord and the church.2. It descends from the marriage between good and truth.
3. It is spiritual, as the church in a person is spiritual.
4. It is the fundamental love and the head of all celestial and
spiritual loves.5. It is truly the seedbed of the human race and consequently
of the angelic heaven.6. It exists, therefore, also among angels of heaven, and from
it are born with them spiritual offspring, which are love and
wisdom.7. The use it serves is thus more excellent than the other uses
in creation.It follows from these considerations that, regarded from its
origin and in its essence, true married love is pure and sacred –
so pure and sacred that it may be called the essence of purity and
sacredness, consequently of chastity. But still, it is not
entirely pure in people, not even in angels, as may be seen in no.
146, which follows here under point (6) below.
- 143. [True married love is real chastity]
- (5) All the delights of true married love,
even the end delights, are chaste.- 144. [All the delights of true married love
are chaste.]144. (5) All the delights of true married love, even the end
delights, are chaste. This follows from the foregoing
considerations explaining that true married love is the essence of
chastity. And delights make the life of this love.I have indicated earlier how the delights of this love ascend
and enter heaven, and on the way permeate the joys of heavenly
loves experienced by angels of heaven. I have also recounted how
these delights ally themselves with the delights of married love
in angels. Moreover, I have heard from angels that they perceive
these delights to be heightened in them and to become fuller as
they ascend from chaste married partners on earth. And in response
to some bystanders, who were unchaste – in reply to their question
whether they also experienced the end delights – the angels nodded
and quietly said, “What else? Are they not delights of
married love in their fullest expression?”(Regarding the source of the delights of this love and what
they are like, see no. 69 above and what is said
in the narrative accounts, especially in those that follow.)
- 144. [All the delights of true married love
- (6) Married love is more and more purified
and becomes chaste in people who become spiritual from the Lord.-
- 145. [Married love is gradually purified]
145. (6) Married love is more and more purified and becomes
chaste in people who become spiritual from the Lord. The reasons
are these:1. The first love – meaning the love before the wedding and
just after the wedding – draws some of its character from a love
for the opposite sex, thus from a heat belonging to the body not
yet tempered by a love of the spirit.[2] 2. A person from being natural only gradually becomes
spiritual. For a person becomes spiritual as his rationality –
which stands in between heaven and the world – begins to draw its
life or soul from what flows in from heaven. This occurs as he
becomes affected by and is delighted with wisdom (the wisdom
spoken of above in no. 130). To the degree that
this happens, to the same degree his mind is raised into a higher
atmosphere, which is the containing medium of heavenly light and
heat, or, to say the same thing, of the wisdom and love which
angels possess. For the light of heaven is united with wisdom, and
the warmth of heaven with love. And as wisdom and its accompanying
love increase in married partners, so married love is purified in
them. Because this occurs gradually, it follows that this love
becomes more and more chaste.This spiritual purification can be likened to the purification
of natural spirits which chemists perform, whose processes are
called clarification, distillation, rectification, cohobation or
redistillation, concentration, decantation, sublimation. And
wisdom when purified may be likened to alcohol, which is a highly
distilled spirit.[3] 3. Spiritual wisdom in itself is such that it grows warmer
and warmer with the love of becoming wise, and because of this, it
increases to eternity. This takes place as it is perfected as
though by processes of clarification, distillation, rectification,
concentration, decantation, and sublimation – processes which are
accomplished by purifications and separations of the intellect
from the misconceptions of the senses, and of the will from the
temptations of the body. Now, because of this, it is apparent that
married love, being the offspring of wisdom, likewise becomes
gradually more and more pure, thus more and more chaste.For testimony that the first state of love between married
partners is a state of heat not yet tempered with light, but that
it is gradually tempered as the husband is perfected in wisdom and
as the wife grows to love that wisdom in her husband, see what was
said in the narrative account in no. 137.
- 145. [Married love is gradually purified]
- 146. [No love is pure]
146. It should be known, however, that married love does not
become entirely chaste or pure in people, not even in angels.
There is still something not chaste or not pure, which attaches
and appends itself to the love. Nevertheless, this element is
different in nature from unchasteness. For in the kind of people
referred to here [who are becoming spiritual from the Lord],
chastity exists above and a lack of chastity below, and between
the two qualities the Lord puts a door, so to speak, with a hinge.
This door is opened by conscious decision, but the Lord provides
that it not stand open so as to allow the one quality to pass
through to the other and become mixed together with it. For the
natural character of a person is, from birth, contaminated and
filled with evil qualities, while his spiritual character is not
so, since his spiritual character has its birth from the Lord,
this birth being regeneration. And regeneration is a gradual
separation from the evil qualities which attach by birth to his
inclinations.As seen above in no. 71, no love in people or
angels is entirely pure, nor can it become so. But the Lord
regards primarily the objective, purpose or intention of the will,
and therefore to the extent that a person has the objective,
purpose or intention and perseveres in them, to that extent he is
introduced into purity and progressively draws nearer to it.
-
- (7) Chastity in marriage comes about through
total renunciation of licentious relationships in accordance with
religion.-
- 147. [Removing unchastity brings chastity]
147. (7) Chastity in marriage comes about through total
renunciation of licentious relationships in accordance with
religion. The reason is that chastity is the removal of
unchasteness. It is a universal rule that to the extent anyone
removes evil, to the same extent an opportunity is given for
goodness to succeed it. And furthermore, to the extent anyone
hates evil, to the same extent he loves goodness. The reverse is
also the case as well. Consequently it follows that to the extent
anyone renounces licentiousness, to the same extent he allows the
chastity of marriage to enter.The fact that married love is purified and refined according to
one’s renunciation of licentious relationships – this everyone
sees from common perception if he only hears it said, thus without
prior arguments. But because all people do not have common
perception, it is useful that it be clarified by arguments too.The arguments are as follows: Married love cools as soon as it
becomes divided, and the growing coldness causes it to die, it
being the heat of unchaste love that kills it. For two opposing
feelings of warmth cannot exist together at the same time without
the one casting out the other and depriving it of its vitality.
When the warmth of married love displaces and casts out the heat
of licentious love, therefore, married love begins to grow
pleasantly warm and, from a sensation of its delights, to bud and
blossom, like an orchard or rose garden in springtime. The
difference is that an orchard or rose garden does so in response
to the vernal warmth of light and heat from the sun of the natural
world, while married love does so in response to the vernal warmth
of light and heat from the sun of the spiritual world.
- 147. [Removing unchastity brings chastity]
-
- 148. [The internal purifies the external]
148. From creation and so from birth, every person has
implanted in him an internal inclination to be married and an
external one. The internal one is spiritual, and the external one
natural. A person comes first into the external inclination, and
as he becomes spiritual he comes into the internal one.
Consequently, if he remains in the external or natural inclination
to be married, then the internal or spiritual inclination is
covered with a veil, until the person knows nothing of it, even,
indeed, until he calls it an empty fiction.But, on the other hand, if the person becomes spiritual, then
he begins to know something about it, afterwards to perceive
something of its character, and gradually to feel its pleasant,
agreeable and delightful sensations. And according as this
happens, so the aforementioned covering between the external and
internal inclinations begins to grow thinner, then to melt, so to
speak, and finally to dissolve and disappear. When this has come
to pass, the external inclination to be married indeed remains,
but it is continually chastened and cleansed of its impurities by
the internal inclination, and this even until the external
inclination becomes, as it were, the visible expression of the
internal one – drawing its pleasure, and at the same time its life
and the delights of its vitality, from the bliss that exists in
the internal one.That is what the renunciation of licentious relationships
means, through which chastity in marriage comes about.[2] One may believe that the external inclination to be married
that is left after the internal inclination has separated itself
from it, or it from itself, is no different from an external
inclination that has not been separated. But I have heard from
angels that the two are completely unlike each other. They have
said, for example, that the external inclination resulting from
the internal one – which they called the external of the internal
– is free of all lasciviousness, because the internal inclination
is incapable of lascivious pleasures but can feel delights only in
a chaste manner, and it induces a similar character on its
external expression, in which it experiences its delights.The external inclination separated from the internal one is
altogether different. The angels said this was lascivious in
general and in every part.An external inclination to be married resulting from an
internal one – this they likened to choice fruit, whose pleasant
flavor and fragrance 3permeate its skin and turn it into a form
corresponding to them. They also likened it to a granary, whose
store of grain is never diminished, but whatever is taken from it
is constantly replaced again.On the other hand, an external inclination separated from an
internal one – this they likened to wheat in a winnow, saying that
if it is thrown about, only chaff remains, which a breeze in the
air scatters. This is what happens with married love if the
licentious element is not renounced.
- 148. [The internal purifies the external]
- 149. [Only religion changes the internal]
149. Chastity in marriage does not come about through
renunciation of licentious relationships unless this is done in
accordance with religion. The reason is that a person without
religion does not become spiritual, but remains natural. And if a
natural person renounces licentious relationships, still his
spirit does not renounce them. Consequently, even though it seems
to him that by renouncing them he is chaste, nevertheless
unchasteness still lies hidden within, like putrefaction in a
wound only superficially healed.As seen above in no. 130, married love
depends on the state of the church in a person. More on this
subject may be seen in the exposition of point (11) which follows
below.
-
- (8) Chastity cannot be ascribed to little
children or boys and girls, nor to adolescents of either sex before
they feel a love for the opposite sex stirring in them.- 150. [Chastity does not describe children]
150. (8) Chastity cannot be ascribed to little children or boys
and girls, nor to adolescents of either sex before they feel a
love for the opposite sex stirring in them. The reason is that
chastity and unchasteness are terms that apply only to states of
marriage and things which have to do with marriage (see above, no.
139). And in the case of persons who know
nothing about marital matters, there is no ascribing of chastity;
for it is as nothing to them, and people do not have any affection
for or any thought about what is nothing to them. After that state
when chastity is as nothing, however, something else arises, when
the first impulse towards marriage is felt, which is a love for
the opposite sex.Adolescents of both sexes are commonly called chaste before
they feel a love for the opposite sex stirring in them, but this
is owing to people’s ignorance of what chastity is.
- 150. [Chastity does not describe children]
- (9) Chastity cannot be ascribed to people
who are born eunuchs or who have been made eunuchs.- 151. [Chastity does not describe eunuchs]
151. (9) Chastity cannot be ascribed to people who are born
eunuchs or who have been made eunuchs.[*1] By people who are born
eunuchs we mean chiefly people in whom the outmost impulse of love
is missing from birth. And because the highest and intermediate
impulses then lack a foundation on which to rest, neither do these
impulses develop. Or if they do, the people are not concerned with
distinguishing between chaste and unchaste states, since either
one is a matter of indifference to them. The diversities among
people like this, however, are many.The case with people who have been made eunuchs is almost the
same, as with some who are born eunuchs; only that having become
eunuchs, and being such, whether men or women, therefore they
cannot help but regard married love as a fantasy and its delights
as fairy tales. If anything of the inclination remains in them, it
becomes silent, which is neither chaste nor unchaste; and being
neither, it is incapable of being classed in one category or the
other.[*1] Cf. Matthew 19:12.
- 151. [Chastity does not describe eunuchs]
- (10) Chastity cannot be ascribed to people
who do not believe that adultery is an evil against religion, and
still less to those who do not believe that adultery is harmful to
society.- 152. [Chastity does not describe people who
believe in adultery]152. (10) Chastity cannot be ascribed to people who do not
believe that adultery is an evil against religion, and still less
to those who do not believe that adultery is harmful to society.
Chastity cannot be ascribed to people like this because they do
not know what chastity is, nor even that it is possible. For
chastity has to do with marriage, as we showed under the first
heading here; and although religion in married partners makes
marriage chaste, people who do not believe that adultery is an
evil against religion also regard marriage as unchaste. Thus
nothing to them is chaste. Consequently it is pointless to speak
to them of chastity. People like this are deliberate adulterers.On the other hand, people who do not believe that adultery is
harmful to society know even less than the first kind of people
what chastity is or that it is possible. For they are purposeful
adulterers. If they say that marriage is less unchaste than
adultery, they say it with the lips but not with the heart,
because marriages in their case are cold. And people who speak
from this state of coldness about a state of chaste warmth cannot
have any idea of the chaste warmth in married love.What these people are like, and the ideas of their thought, and
therefore the interior ideas in their speech, will be seen in Part
Two on the insanities of adulterers.
- 152. [Chastity does not describe people who
- (11) Chastity cannot be ascribed to people
who abstain from adulterous relationships only for various external
reasons.- 153. [Chastity is not about the external
appearance only]153. (11) Chastity cannot be ascribed to people who abstain
from adulterous relationships only for various external reasons.
Many people believe that chastity is simply abstinence from
adultery physically, even though this is not chastity unless it is
also at the same time abstinence in spirit. For a person’s spirit
– meaning here his mind in its affections and thoughts – is what
makes him chaste or unchaste, chastity or unchasteness being in
the body as a result of the spirit. For what the body is like
depends entirely on the mind or spirit. It follows from this that
people who abstain from adultery physically and not as a result of
the spirit are not chaste, nor those who abstain from it in spirit
for the sake of the body.There are many reasons which cause a person to refrain from
adulterous relationships physically, and also in spirit for the
sake of the body. But still, a person who does not refrain from
them physically as a result of the spirit is unchaste. For the
Lord says:(If anyone) looks at (another’s) woman so as to lust for her,
(he) has already committed adultery with her in his heart.
(Matthew 5:28)[2] We cannot list all the reasons for people’s abstaining from
adulterous relationships only physically, since these reasons vary
according to the states of their marriage and also according to
the states of their body.For example, there are some who abstain from adulterous
relationships because they are afraid of the civil law and its
penalties; because they are afraid of losing reputation and thus
respect; because they are afraid of diseases resulting from such
relationships; because they are afraid of being railed at by their
wives at home and of having no peace in their lives on account of
it; because they are afraid the husband or a relative will take
revenge; or because they are afraid of being beaten by the
servants.There are also some who abstain because they are too poor, or
too stingy, or because they are too feeble owing either to
illness, or to their abusing themselves, or to age, or to
impotence.There are some among them as well who, because they cannot or
dare not do it physically, also for that reason condemn adultery
in spirit and so speak in a moral fashion against it and in favor
of marriage. But if these people do not renounce adultery in
spirit and of the spirit in accordance with religion, they are
still adulterers, for even though they do not do it physically,
still they commit it in spirit. And after death, when they become
spirits, they therefore speak openly in favor of it.It is apparent from this that even an irreligious person can
abstain from adulterous relationships as harmful, but that only a
Christian can abstain from them as sins.This now establishes the truth of the argument, that chastity
cannot be ascribed to people who abstain from adulterous
relationships only for various external reasons.
- 153. [Chastity is not about the external
- (12) Chastity cannot be ascribed to people
who believe that marriages are unchaste.- 154. [Chaste people see marriage as chaste]
154. (12) Chastity cannot be ascribed to people who believe
that marriages are unchaste. People like this neither know what
chastity is, nor that it is possible, like the people dealt with
above in no. 152, and like those who place
chastity only in celibacy, spoken of next.
- 154. [Chaste people see marriage as chaste]
- (13) Chastity cannot be ascribed to people
who have renounced marriage by a vow of perpetual celibacy, unless a
love for the truly married life is present and remains in them.- 155. [Chastity is not celibacy]
155. (13) Chastity cannot be ascribed to people who have
renounced marriage by a vow of perpetual celibacy, unless a love
for the truly married life is present and remains in them. There
is no ascribing of chastity to people like this, because after a
vow of perpetual celibacy, they cast aside married love, and yet
chastity is applicable only to this love.Moreover, there is still an attraction to the opposite sex in
them from creation and so from birth, and when this is restrained
and suppressed, it inevitably happens that the attraction turns
into a feeling of warmth and in some cases into a state of heat,
which, rising from the body into the spirit, torments it and in
some people corrupts it. It can happen as well that the spirit
thus corrupted in turn corrupts matters of religion and casts them
down from their proper internal abode, where they are held in
reverence, to an external abode, where they become merely words
and gestures.Because of this, the Lord has therefore provided that celibacy
of this kind occur only among people who have an external worship,
which they are in because they do not go to the Lord or read the
Word. In their case, eternal life is not put in peril by
conditions of celibacy imposed along with a vow of chastity, as it
would be in the case of people who have an internal worship.In addition, many of these people do not enter that kind of
life of their own free will, but some do so before they reach a
state of freedom arising from reason, and some do so as a result
of seductive influences from the world. [2] Among people who adopt
that way of life in order to free their minds from the world so as
to have time for Divine worship, only those are chaste in whom a
love for the truly married life either was present before the
celibate state or came into being afterwards and then remained,
because a love for the truly married life is the love to which
chastity applies.For this reason, too, after death, all monastics are finally
released from their vows and allowed to go free, in order that
they may be led to choose either married or unmarried life
according to the inner prayers and longings of their love. If they
then choose to enter married life, those who have at the same time
loved the spiritual things of worship are allowed to marry in
heaven. But those who choose an unmarried life are sent to others
like themselves, who live in the outskirts of heaven.[3] With respect to women who devoted themselves to a life of
piety, giving themselves up to Divine worship and thus withdrawing
themselves from the illusions of the world and the lusts of the
flesh, and who had therefore taken a vow of perpetual virginity, I
have asked angels whether they are received into heaven, and
whether they become first among the happy there, according to
their belief. But the angels replied that they are indeed
received, but when they feel the atmosphere of married love there,
they become unhappy and distressed. And then, the angels said,
they leave or are sent away, some of them going on their own, some
after asking permission, and some by being told to go. Moreover,
when they are outside the heaven they had been in, a way opens
before them leading to companions who had lived in a similar state
of life in the world. And then they become no longer distressed
but cheerful, and they rejoice with one another.
- 155. [Chastity is not celibacy]
- (14) The state of marriage is preferable to
a state of celibacy.- 156. [Marriage is preferable to celibacy]
156. (14) The state of marriage is preferable to a state of
celibacy. This follows from what has been said so far about
marriage and celibacy. The state of marriage is preferable because
it exists from creation; because the origin of it is the marriage
between good and truth; because it corresponds to the marriage of
the Lord and the church; because the church and married love are
constant companions; and because the use it serves is more
excellent than the uses served by anything else in creation,
seeing that it results, according to order, in the propagation of
the human race, and also of the angelic heaven, since heaven
exists from the human race. In addition to this, marriage is the
completion of a person, for by marriage a person becomes a
complete person, as we show next in the following chapter.[*1]
None of these things is true of celibacy.[2] On the other hand, if one takes the proposition that a
state of celibacy is better than the state of marriage and turns
it over to an inquisition to approve and confirm by arguments,
then these arguments lead to the following conclusions: That
marriage is not sacred, nor can any marriage be chaste. Indeed,
that chastity in the female sex is possible only in the case of
those who refrain from marrying and take a vow of perpetual
virginity. And moreover, that people who take a vow of perpetual
celibacy are the kind of people meant by “eunuchs who make
themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of God”
(Matthew 19:12). Besides many other conclusions which, stemming
from an untrue premise, are also untrue.“Eunuchs who make themselves eunuchs for the sake of the
kingdom of God” mean spiritual eunuchs, and these are people
who in their marriages abstain from the evils of licentious
relationships. The statement plainly does not mean Italian
castrati.[*2][*1] See “The Conjunction of Souls and Minds by Marriage,”
nos. 156[r]ff.[*2] Male singers, especially in the 18th century, castrated
before puberty to prevent the soprano or contralto voice range
from changing.
- 156. [Marriage is preferable to celibacy]
- Some men of olden times in Greece, who
inquired of newcomers what news they had from earth and learned of
people found in a forest there (nos. 151[r]
–154[r] ).-
- 151[r]. [Animal-like
humans found]151r. [repeated][*1] To this I will append two narrative
accounts. This is the first:As I was returning home from the school of wisdom spoken of
above in no. 132, on the way I saw an angel
dressed in blue.He attached himself to my side and said, “I see that you
have come from one of the schools of wisdom and that you were
pleased by what you heard there. I perceive, too, that you are not
fully in this world, because you are at the same time in the
natural world. You are therefore also not acquainted with our
Olympian gymnasia, where sages of old meet and learn from
newcomers from your world what changes and progressions the state
of wisdom has gone through and is presently undergoing. This being
the case, if you wish, I will take you to a place where many of
the sages of old live, together with their descendants or
disciples.”He then took me to a border region between the north and the
east. And when from an elevation I looked out toward it, suddenly
a city appeared, and on one side of it two hills, with the hill
nearer the city being lower than the other.And the angel said to me, “That city is called Athenaeum,
the lower hill Parnassium, and the higher one Heliconeum. They are
called by these names because in the city and around it live wise
men of old from Greece, such as Pythagoras, Socrates, Aristippus,
and Xenophon, along with their disciples and pupils.”I then asked about Plato and Aristotle. The angel said that
they and their followers lived in another region, because they
taught matters of reason having to do with the intellect, while
the ones here taught matters of morality having to do with life.[2] The angel said that scholarly envoys are frequently sent
out from the city of Athenaeum to educated Christians, to find out
from them what people presently think about God, the creation of
the universe, the immortality of the soul, the nature of man
compared to the nature of animals, and other things which are
matters of interior wisdom. And the angel said that today a herald
had announced an assembly, a sign that the envoys had found
newcomers from the earth from whom they had heard some interesting
news.We then saw many people coming out of the city and from the
surrounding area, some wearing laurel wreaths on their heads, some
holding palm branches in their hands, some with books under their
arms, and some with pens under the hair of the left temple.We slipped in among them and together ascended. And lo, on the
hill there was an octagonal palace, which they called the
Palladium, and we went in. And behold, we saw there eight
hexagonal alcoves, each with a set of bookcases in it, and also a
table, at which the people with the laurel wreaths sat. Moreover,
in the Palladium itself we saw benches carved out of stone, on
which the rest of the people took their seats. [3] And then a door
opened on the left, through which two newcomers from earth were
ushered in. And having first greeted them, one of those wearing
the laurel wreaths asked: “What news do you have from earth?”So the newcomers said, “The news is that some people
resembling beasts, or beasts resembling people, have been found in
a forest. From their facial and physical features, however, it has
been reportedly learned that they were born human, and that they
were lost or left in the forest when they were about two or three
years old.“According to the report,” the newcomers said, “they
are unable to express any thought verbally, nor are they able to
learn how to articulate sound into the form of any word. Nor did
they know what food was suitable for them, as animals do, but they
thrust into their mouth things they found in the forest, both
things fit to be eaten and things unfit – to mention only some of
many other similar discoveries. As a result of these findings,
some of the learned among us have formed a number of conjectures,
and others conclusions, about the nature of human beings compared
to the nature of animals.”[4] When they heard this, some of the sages of old inquired,
“What conjectures and conclusions do they draw from these
discoveries?”The two newcomers then replied that there were a number of
them, but that they could be reduced to the following:1. By his own nature and also from birth, the human being is
more stupid and thus worse off than any animal, and that is the
way he turns out if he is not educated.2. He can be educated because he learned how to make articulate
sounds and thus to speak, and by that means began to express
thoughts, and this gradually more and more, until he was able to
formulate laws of society, though many of these laws are imprinted
on animals from birth.3. Animals have the same faculty of reason as human beings.
4. Therefore if animals could talk, they would reason on any
subject as cleverly as human beings. It is an indication of their
ability that they think in accordance with the same reason and
prudence as human beings.[5] 5. The intellect is no more than a modified form of light
from the sun, aided by warmth, by means of the ether, so that it
is only an activity of interior nature, and this activity can be
raised to the point that it appears as wisdom.6. It is therefore vain to believe that a person lives after
death any more than an animal – unless perhaps, owing to an
exhalation of the life of the body, he may possibly appear for
several days after death as a vapor resembling a ghost, before it
evaporates back into nature – in much the same way as a bush
raised from the ashes appears in a likeness of its prior form.7. Consequently, religion, which teaches life after death, is
an invention to keep simple people in bondage from within by its
laws, as they are kept in bondage from without by laws of the
state.To this the newcomers added, that that was merely how some
clever people reasoned, but not the intelligent ones.Their listeners then asked, “What is the reasoning of the
intelligent ones?”The newcomers answered that they had not heard, but it was what
they supposed.[*1] Numbers 151-156 are used twice. To maintain the proper
sequence they are all included after the first number 156.
NewSearch98 thus treats them all as part of number 156. However,
when referenced it should be to the specific number, such as CL
154r.
- 151[r]. [Animal-like
-
- 152[r]. [Wisdom has been lost]
152r. [repeated][*1] On hearing these things, the people who
were sitting at the tables all said, “Oh, what the times are
like on earth now! Alas, what changes wisdom has undergone! Has
wisdom become ingenious nonsense? The sun has set and now stands
beneath the earth diametrically opposite its zenith!“From the evidence of the people left and found in the
forest, who cannot see that that is what a human being is like
without education? Is he not as he is taught? Is he not born in a
greater state of ignorance than animals? Does he not have to learn
to walk and talk? If he did not learn to walk, would he stand
erect upon his feet? And if he did not learn to talk, would he
mutter anything he thought? Is everyone not as he is taught,
irrational from being taught falsities, and wise from being taught
truths? And one who is irrational from being taught falsities – is
he not entirely caught up in the fantasy that he is wiser than one
who is wise from being taught truths? Are there not fools and
lunatics who are no more human than the people found in the
forest? Are persons without memory not similar to them?[2] “From these considerations and observations, we
ourselves conclude that a person without education is not human,
and not an animal either, but that he is a form of life which can
receive into himself that which makes a person human. And thus we
conclude that he is not born human, but becomes human; and that a
person is born such a form of life in order that he may be an
organism receptive of life from God, so that he may become a
vessel into which God can introduce every kind of good and which
by union with Himself He can bless to eternity.“We perceive from what you have said that wisdom today has
become so nonexistent or nonsensical that people know nothing at
all about the nature of the life of human beings compared to the
nature of the life of animals. That is why they also do not know
the nature of man’s life after death. Nevertheless, those who
could know it, but do not wish to know it and therefore deny it,
as many of your Christians do – we can liken them to the people
found in the forest. Not that they have become that stupid from a
lack of education; but by relying on misconceptions of the senses,
which are dark shadows of truths, they have made themselves that
stupid.”[*1] Numbers 151-156 are used twice. To maintain the proper
sequence they are all included after the first number 156.
NewSearch98 thus treats them all as part of number 156. However,
when referenced it should be to the specific number, such as CL
154r.
- 152[r]. [Wisdom has been lost]
-
- 153[r]. [Wisdom and love are from God]
153r. [repeated][*1] At this point, however, someone in the
middle of the Palladium stood up, holding a palm branch in his
hand, and said, “Explain, please, this mystery, how a human
being, created in the image of God, could be changed into the form
of a devil. I know that angels of heaven are images of God and
that angels of hell are images of the devil; and the two forms are
opposite each other, angels of hell being forms of madness, angels
of heaven forms of wisdom. Tell us, therefore, how a human being,
created in the image of God, could pass from the light of day into
such darkness of night that he could deny God and eternal life.”[2] To this the masters replied in turn, first the
Pythagoreans, then the Socratics, and afterwards the rest.But there was among them a certain Platonist. He spoke last,
and his opinion prevailed. He said that people of the Saturnian
period or golden age knew and acknowledged that they were
recipient forms of life from God, and wisdom was therefore
engraved on their souls and hearts. And consequently, from the
light of truth they saw truth, and through truths perceived good
from the delight of a love for good.“However,” he said, “in subsequent ages, the
human race fell away from acknowledging that all truth of wisdom
and consequent goodness of love in them continually flowed in from
God; and as they fell away from this acknowledgment, they ceased
to be dwelling places of God. Moreover, speech with God and
association with angels also then ceased. For the orientation of
the inner faculties of their minds, which had been directed
upwards by God to God, became more and more bent in a slanting
direction outward to the world, so that it was directed by God to
God through the world; and finally it was turned upside down in
the opposite direction, which is downwards to self. And because
God cannot be regarded by a person who is inwardly upside down and
thus turned away, people separated themselves from God and became
forms of hell or the devil.[3] “It follows from this that, in the first ages, people
acknowledged with their heart and soul that all goodness of love
and so truth of wisdom came to them from God, and also that these
virtues were virtues of God in them, so that they themselves were
merely recipients of life from God and for this reason were called
images of God, sons of God, and born of God. But it follows then
that, in succeeding ages, they no longer acknowledged this with
their heart and soul, but did so owing to a certain conviction of
belief, and then as a result of traditional faith, and finally
with the lips alone. And to acknowledge something like this with
the lips alone is not really acknowledging. Indeed, it is to deny
at heart.“Consequently it can be seen what wisdom is like today on
earth among Christians – even though with their written revelation
they could be inspired by God – when they do not know the
difference between man and animal. And because of this, many of
them believe that if a person lives after death, so will an
animal. Or, because an animal does not live after death, so
neither will a person. Has not our spiritual light, which
enlightens the sight of the mind, become darkness in them? And
their natural light, which enlightens only the sight of the body –
has it not become their refulgence?”[*1] Numbers 151-156 are used twice. To maintain the proper
sequence they are all included after the first number 156.
NewSearch98 thus treats them all as part of number 156. However,
when referenced it should be to the specific number, such as CL
154r.
- 153[r]. [Wisdom and love are from God]
- 154[r]. [Goodness and truth are the Lord’s]
154r. [repeated][*1] After this the people all turned to the
two visitors and thanked them for their coming and for their
account; and they begged them to report to their comrades what
they had heard.Then the visitors replied that they would convince their
friends of this truth, that they are human to the extent that they
attribute every good of charity and truth of faith to the Lord and
not to themselves; and that in the same measure they become angels
of heaven.[*1] Numbers 151-156 are used twice. To maintain the proper
sequence they are all included after the first number 156.
NewSearch98 thus treats them all as part of number 156. However,
when referenced it should be to the specific number, such as CL
154r.
-
- Golden rain, and a hall where some wives
made various comments on the subject of married love (no. 155[r]).- 155[r]. [Wives on the
delights of love]155r. [repeated][*1] The second account:One morning I was awakened by the sound of very sweet singing
from some height above me. And being therefore in the first moment
of awakening, which is more internal, peaceful and gentle than any
other moment of the day, I could be kept for a while in the
spirit, as though outside the body, and could attend keenly to the
affection which was being expressed in song. (A song in heaven is
nothing but an affection of the mind which is expressed vocally as
a melody, for it is the sound of one speaking without spoken
words, coming from the same affection of love which gives life to
speech.)In that state I perceived that it was an affection having to do
with the delights of married love, which was turned into song by
wives in heaven. I noticed that this was so from the sound of the
singing, in which those delights were variously expressed in
marvelous ways.After this I arose and looked out into the spiritual world. And
lo, in the east, beneath the sun there, I saw what seemed to be
golden rain. It was morning mist, descending in such quantity
that, struck by the rays of the sun, it presented to my eyes the
appearance of golden rain. Being still more fully awakened on
account of it, I went out in spirit, and then, meeting by chance
an angel, I asked him whether he saw the golden rain coming down
from the sun.[2] Answering, he replied that he saw it whenever he was
thinking about married love and then turned his eyes in that
direction.He said further, “That rain falls upon a hall where there
are three husbands with their wives, who live at the center of an
eastern paradise. This kind of rain seems to be falling from the
sun upon that hall, because abiding in those husbands and wives is
wisdom concerning married love and its delights – in the husbands,
wisdom concerning married love, and in the wives, wisdom
concerning its delights.“But since I perceive that you are thinking about the
delights of married love, I will take you to that hall and
introduce you.”So he led me through areas befitting a paradise to houses which
were built with boards of olive wood, with two columns of cedar in
front of the entrance; and having introduced me to the husbands,
he asked that I be allowed, in their presence, to speak with their
wives.They then nodded and called their wives.
The wives looked searchingly into my eyes. So I asked, “What
are you looking at?” They said, “We can see keenly what
attraction you feel and therefore what affection you have, which
is where your thought concerning love for the opposite sex comes
from. And we see that although you are thinking about it intently,
still you are thinking chastely.” They then said, “What
do you want us to tell you about it?”So I replied, “Please tell me something about the delights
of married love.”And the husbands nodded, saying, “Reveal to them something
about these delights, if you wish. Their ears are chaste.”[3] So they asked, “Who told you that we were the ones to
ask about the delights of that love? Why not our husbands?”Then I replied, “This angel who is with me, he told me
privately that wives are vessels receptive of and sensitive to
those delights, because they are born forms of love, and all
delights have to do with love.”Smiling at this they answered, “Be discreet, and do not
say such a thing unless it can be interpreted in more than one
way, because it is a point of wisdom kept deeply hidden in the
hearts of our sex, which is not revealed to any husband except to
one who is in a state of true married love. There are many reasons
for this, which we conceal within and keep to ourselves.”At that the husbands then said, “Our wives know all the
states of our mind, nor is anything hidden from them. They see,
perceive and feel whatever comes from our will. And we in turn
know nothing of this in our wives. Wives have this gift, because
they have very tender loves and feelings of almost blazing zeal
for the preservation of the friendship and trust in marriage and
thus for the preservation of both partners’ happiness of life.
This happiness they watch over for their husbands and themselves
from a wisdom inherent in their love – wisdom which is so full of
discretion that they will not and therefore cannot say that they
are the lovers, but that they are the recipients of love.”I then asked why wives will not and so cannot say this.
The wives replied that if the least suggestion of anything like
this were to slip from their lips, their husbands would be invaded
with coldness, which would separate them from their bed, bedroom,
and sight.“But this happens,” they said, “in the case of
people who do not hold marriage sacred, and who therefore do not
love their wives with a spiritual love. It is different with those
who do. This love in their minds is spiritual, and in the body
becomes natural as a result of that. We here in this hall
experience the natural love as a result of a spiritual one, and
consequently we confide to our husbands secrets about the delights
we feel having to do with married love.”[4] At this point, I respectfully asked them to reveal
something of these secrets to me as well. And immediately they
looked toward the window to the south, where suddenly a white dove
appeared. Its wings shone as though with silver, and its head was
adorned with a crown seemingly of gold. It was standing on a
branch, which had an olive growing out from it.As they saw the dove engaged in an attempt to spread its wings,
the wives said, “We will reveal something. When that dove
appears, it is a sign to us that we may.”They then said, “Every man has five senses: sight,
hearing, smell, taste and touch. But we have also a sixth sense,
which is a sense of all the delights of married love in our
husbands. We have this sense in the palms of our hands, whenever
we touch our husbands’ breasts, arms, hands or cheeks – especially
their breasts – and also when we are touched by them. All the
happy and pleasant states of the thoughts of their mind, and all
the joys and delights of their heart, and the merry and cheerful
feelings in their breast – these are then transmitted from them to
us, taking form in us and becoming perceptible, discernible, and
tangible. Moreover, we discern these things as keenly and as
clearly as the ear discerns the melodies of songs, or as the
tongue does the flavors of exquisite foods.“In a word, the spiritual delights of our husbands take on
a kind of natural embodiment in us. And for that reason, our
husbands call us the sensory organs of chaste married love and
therefore of its delights. But this sense in our sex appears,
continues, remains, and rises in the measure that our husbands
love us for our wisdom and judgment, and in the measure that we
love them in return for the same qualities in them. In heaven,
this sense in our sex is called the interplay of wisdom with its
love and of love with its wisdom.”[5] I was stirred by this with a desire to ask more questions,
such as about the variety of the delights.Answering, they said, “The variety is endless. However, we
do not wish to say any more, and therefore we cannot, because the
dove outside our window, with the olive branch under its feet, has
flown away.”I then waited for its return, but in vain. Meanwhile, I asked
the husbands, “Do you have a similar sense of married love?”And they replied, “We have one in general, but not in
particular. We have a general sense of bliss, of delight, and of
pleasant contentment, owing to the particular sensations of these
in our wives. And this general sense, which we have from them, is
like a peaceful serenity.”At these words, suddenly through the window a swan appeared,
standing on the branch of a fig tree; and spreading its wings, it
flew off.Seeing this, the husbands said, “That is a sign for us to
be silent about married love. Come back from time to time, and
perhaps more will be disclosed.”They then withdrew, and we departed.
[*1] Numbers 151-156 are used twice. To maintain the proper
sequence they are all included after the first number 156.
NewSearch98 thus treats them all as part of number 156. However,
when referenced it should be to the specific number, such as CL
154r.
- 155[r]. [Wives on the
-
- 156r. THE CONJUNCTION OF SOULS AND MINDS BY
MARRIAGE MEANT BY THE LORD’S SAYING THAT THEY ARE NO LONGER TWO BUT
ONE FLESH-
- 156[r]. [CONJUNCTION OF SOULS AND MINDS]
An inclination and also a capacity for conjunction as though
into one was implanted in man and woman from creation, and man and
woman still have this inclination and capacity in them. That this
is so appears from the book of creation, and at the same time from
what the Lord said. In the book of creation, which we call Genesis,
we read:Jehovah God fashioned the rib, which He had taken from the man,
into a woman, and He brought her to the man. And the man said,
“This one, this time, is bone of my bones and flesh of my
flesh. She shall be called woman (“ishshah), because she was
taken from man (“ish). For this reason a man shall leave his
father and mother and cling to his wife, and they shall be as one
flesh.” (Genesis 2:22-24)The Lord also said something similar in Matthew:
Have you not read that He who made them from the
beginning…male and female…, said, “For this reason a man
shall leave father and mother and cling to his wife, and the two
shall be as one flesh”? Therefore they are no longer two, but
one flesh. (Matthew 19:4-6)[2] It is apparent from these verses that woman was created out
of man, and that they each have both an inclination and a capacity
for reuniting themselves into one. This means into one person, as
is also apparent from the book of creation, where the two together
are called “man.” For we read:In the day that God created man…, He created them male and
female…and called their name Man…. (Genesis 5:1,2)We find the reading here, “He called their name Adam,”
but “Adam” and “man” are the same word in the
Hebrew. Moreover, both together are called “man” in
Genesis 1:27 and 3:22-24. “One flesh” also means “one
person,” as is apparent from passages in the Word where the
term “all flesh” occurs, meaning “every person”
(such as in Genesis 6:12,13,17,19;[*2] Isaiah 40:5,6, 49:26,
66:16,23,24; Jeremiah 25:31, 32:27, 45:5; Ezekiel 20:48, 21:4,5;
and elsewhere).[3] But as for the meaning of the rib of the man which was
fashioned into a woman, of the flesh which was closed up in its
place, and consequently what is meant by “bone of my bones and
flesh of my flesh,” also what is meant by the father and
mother which a man is to leave when he marries, and by his clinging
to his wife – this we showed in Arcana Coelestia (The Secrets of
Heaven), where we explained the two books, Genesis and Exodus, in
their spiritual sense. We established there that a rib does not
mean a rib, nor flesh flesh, nor a bone bone, nor cling cling, but
that they mean spiritual things, to which they correspond and which
they therefore symbolize. They mean the spiritual things which mold
one person out of two, and this is evident from the fact that it is
married love which joins them together, and this love is spiritual.We have said several times above that a man’s love of wisdom is
transferred into his wife, and this will be more fully established
in the chapters that follow next. We cannot go off and thus digress
now from the subject matter before us here, which is the
conjunction of two married partners into one flesh by a union of
their souls and minds. This union, however, will be made clear
according to the following outline:(1) Each sex has implanted in it from creation a capacity and
inclination that gives them the ability and the will to be joined
together as though into one.(2) Married love joins two souls and thus two minds into one.
(3) A wife’s will unites itself with her husband’s
understanding, and the husband’s understanding in consequence
unites itself with his wife’s will.(4) A desire to unite her husband to her is constant and
continual in a wife, but inconstant and intermittent in a husband.(5) A wife inspires the union in her husband according to her
love, and a husband receives it according to his wisdom.(6) This union takes place gradually from the first days of
marriage, and in people who are in a state of true married love, it
becomes deeper and deeper to eternity.(7) A wife’s union with her husband’s intellectual wisdom takes
place inwardly, but with his moral wisdom outwardly.(8) In order that this union may be achieved, a wife is given a
perception of her husband’s affections, and also the highest
prudence in knowing how to moderate them.(9) Wives keep this perception in them hidden and conceal it
from their husbands for reasons that are necessary in building
married love, friendship and trust, so that they may have bliss in
living together and happiness of life.(10) This perception is a wisdom that the wife has. A man is not
capable of it, neither is a wife capable of her husband’s
intellectual wisdom.(11) A wife from her love continually thinks about her husband’s
disposition towards her, with a view to joining him to her. This is
not true of a husband.(12) A wife joins herself to her husband by appeals to his
will’s desires.(13) A wife is joined to her husband by the atmosphere of her
life emanating from her love.(14) A wife is joined to her husband by her assimilation of the
powers of his manhood, though this depends on the spiritual love
they have for each other.(15) A wife thus receives into herself an image of her husband,
and from it perceives, sees and feels his affections.(16) A husband has duties appropriate to him, and a wife duties
appropriate to her, and a wife cannot enter into duties appropriate
to her husband or a husband into duties appropriate to his wife and
perform them properly.(17) These duties also join the two into one, and at the same
time make a single household, depending on the assistance they
render each other.(18) According as the aforementioned conjunctions are formed,
married partners become more and more one person.(19) Partners who are in a state of true married love feel
themselves to be a united person and as though one flesh.(20) True married love regarded in itself is a union of souls, a
conjunction of minds, an effort to conjunction in breasts, and a
consequent effort to conjunction in body.(21) The states produced by this love are innocence, peace,
tranquillity, inmost friendship, complete trust, and a mutual
desire in mind and heart to do the other every good; also, as a
result of all these, bliss, felicity, delight, pleasure, and, owing
to an eternal enjoyment of states like this, the happiness of
heaven.(22) These blessings are not at all possible except in a
marriage of one man with one wife.Explanation of these statements now follows.
[*1] Numbers 151-156 are used twice. To maintain the proper
sequence they are all included after the first number 156.
NewSearch98 thus treats them all as part of number 156. However,
when referenced it should be to the specific number, such as CL
154r.[*2] “All flesh” in Genesis 6:17,19 seems rather to
refer to all animal life
- 156[r]. [CONJUNCTION OF SOULS AND MINDS]
- (1) Each sex has implanted in it from
creation a capacity and inclination that gives them the ability and
the will to be joined together as though into one.- 157. [Ability to be joined together]
157. (1) Each sex has implanted in it from creation a capacity
and inclination that gives them the ability and the will to be
joined together as though into one. We showed just above from the
book of creation that woman was taken out of man. It follows from
this that the two sexes have therefore a capacity and inclination
to join themselves into one. For whatever is taken from someone
carries with it and retains something from his character which
forms its character. And because it is of a like character, it
yearns for reunion, and when it has been reunited, it exists as
though in itself when it exists in the other, and conversely.It raises no objection to say that each sex has a capacity for
conjunction with the other or that they can be united. Nor that
they have an inclination to join themselves together. For personal
observation and experience attests to both.
- 157. [Ability to be joined together]
- (2) Married love joins two souls and thus
two minds into one.- 158. [Married love joins two souls]
158. (2) Married love joins two souls and thus two minds into
one. Every human being is made up of soul, mind and body. The soul
is his inmost constituent; the mind is his intermediate one; and
the body is the outmost part. Because the soul is a person’s
inmost constituent, it is, from its origin, celestial. Because the
mind is his intermediate constituent, it is, from its origin,
spiritual. And because the body is the outmost part, it is, from
its origin, natural.Things which are, from their origin, celestial, and things
which are, from their origin, spiritual, do not exist in space,
but are in appearances of space. This is also known in the world.
That is why it is said that spiritual things cannot have dimension
or location ascribed to them. Consequently, since the spaces are
appearances, distances and nearnesses are appearances as well.
Appearances of distance and nearness in the spiritual world depend
on congruences, similarities, and affinities of love, as I have
quite often pointed out and established in works I have written
about that world.[*1][2] We say this here in order to have it known that people’s
souls and minds are not in space, as their bodies are, because, as
we said above, their souls and minds are from their origin
celestial and spiritual. And because they are not in space, they
can be joined together as though into one, even though their
bodies cannot be so joined at the same time.This conjunction takes place especially between married
partners who love each other deeply. But because woman comes from
man, and this conjunction is a kind of reunion, reason can see
that it is not an amalgamation into one but an adjunction, nearer
and closer according to the love, and to the point of contact in
those who are in a state of true married love. This adjunction may
be called a spiritual dwelling together, which occurs in the case
of married partners who love each other tenderly, however
separated they may be in body. There are many evidences of
experience, even in the natural world, which attest to this.It is apparent from this that married love joins two souls and
minds into one.[*1] See, for example, Arcana Coelestia (The Secrets of Heaven)
(1749-1756), Heaven and Hell (1758), Divine Love and Wisdom
(1763), Divine Providence (1764), The Apocalypse Revealed (1766).
- 158. [Married love joins two souls]
- (3) A wife’s will unites itself with her
husband’s understanding, and the husband’s understanding in
consequence unites itself with his wife’s will.- 159. [Wife’s will unites with husband’s
understanding]159. (3) A wife’s will unites itself with her husband’s
understanding, and the husband’s understanding in consequence
unites itself with his wife’s will. The reason is that a male is
born to become a form of understanding, and a female to become a
form of will that loves the understanding of the male. It follows
from this that the marital union is a union of the wife’s will
with the husband’s understanding, and a reciprocal union of the
husband’s understanding with the wife’s will. Everyone sees that
there is a very close union between understanding and will, and
that the union is such that the one faculty can enter into the
other and find delight from and in that union.
- 159. [Wife’s will unites with husband’s
- (4) A desire to unite her husband to her is
constant and continual in a wife, but inconstant and intermittent in
a husband.- 160. [Wife is constant, husband inconstant]
160. (4) A desire to unite her husband to her is constant and
continual in a wife, but inconstant and intermittent in a husband.
The reason is that love cannot help but love and unite itself in
order to be loved in return, this being the very essence and life
of love. And women are born forms of love, while men – with whom
they unite themselves in order to be loved in return – are
receivers. Moreover, love is continually operative. It is like
heat, flames and fire, which die if they are prevented from
operating. That is why a desire to unite her husband to her is
constant and continual in a wife.On the other hand, a husband does not have the same desire with
respect to his wife, and that is because a man is not a form of
love but only a form receptive of love. And a state of reception
comes and goes, depending on other concerns which interrupt,
depending on changing feelings of warmth or lack of warmth in the
mind for various reasons, and depending on increases and decreases
of the powers in the body. Because these things do not return in a
constant fashion or at set times, it follows that a desire for
this union is, in husbands, inconstant and intermittent.
- 160. [Wife is constant, husband inconstant]
- (5) A wife inspires the union in her husband
according to her love, and a husband receives it according to his
wisdom.- 161. [Wife inspires, husband receives]
161. (5) A wife inspires the union in her husband according to
her love, and a husband receives it according to his wisdom. The
idea that a wife inspires the love and thus the union in her
husband is today kept hidden from men. Indeed, they universally
deny it. The reason is that their wives persuade them that men
alone are the lovers, and themselves recipients, or that men are
forms of love, and themselves forms of compliance. They even
rejoice at heart when their husbands believe this. Wives persuade
their husbands of this for many reasons, all of which have to do
with the prudence and circumspect nature of wives (concerning
which, something will be said hereafter, and in particular in the
chapter on the reasons for states of coldness, separations and
divorces between married partners[*1]).We say that it is wives who inspire or insinuate the love in
their husbands, because not a particle of married love, not even
of love for the opposite sex, is seated in men, but only in wives
and women. The fact of this was vividly shown me in the spiritual
world:[2] A conversation on this very subject once occurred there,
and some men, having been persuaded by their wives, kept insisting
that they were the lovers, and not their wives, but that their
wives were recipients of love from them.In order to settle the dispute over this question, all women,
including their wives, were removed from the men; and together
with them the underlying atmosphere of love for the opposite sex
was taken away. When this was taken away, the men came into a
state altogether foreign to them and never before felt, at which
they complained considerably.Then, while they were in this state, some women were brought to
them, and the wives were presented to their husbands; and the
women and the wives spoke sweetly to them. But at their
blandishments the men became cold, and turning away they said to
each other, “What is this? What is a woman?” And when
some of the women said that they were their wives, they replied,
“What is a wife? We do not know you.”However, when the wives began to grieve over this utterly cold
indifference on the part of their husbands, and some of them to
cry, an atmosphere of love for the feminine sex and of married
love (which to this point had been taken away from the men) was
restored. And then at once the men returned to their former state
– the ones who loved their marriages into their state, and the
ones who loved the opposite sex in general into their state.Thus the men were convinced that not a particle of married
love, not even of love for the opposite sex, resided in them, but
only in wives and women. But still, after that, owing to their
prudence, the wives induced the men to believe that the love
resided in the men, and that some spark of it might possibly have
passed from the men to themselves.[3] I have presented this experience here in order that it may
be known that wives are forms of love, and husbands its receivers.
Husbands are receivers of it according to the wisdom in them,
especially the wisdom which results from religion, which is that
they are to love only their wives. And this is plain from
considering that when they love only their wives, their love is
concentrated, and being also ennobled, remains in its strength,
endures and lasts; and that otherwise it would be like taking
wheat from a granary and throwing it to the dogs, resulting in an
insufficiency at home.[*1] See nos. 234ff.
- 161. [Wife inspires, husband receives]
- (6) This union takes place gradually from
the first days of marriage, and in people who are in a state of true
married love, it becomes deeper and deeper to eternity.- 162. [union takes place gradually]
162. (6) This union takes place gradually from the first days
of marriage, and in people who are in a state of true married
love, it becomes deeper and deeper to eternity. The first heat in
marriage does not join two people together, because it draws its
character from a love for the opposite sex, which is a love
belonging to the body and on that account to the spirit. And
whatever is in the spirit as a result of the body does not last
long. But love that is in the body as a result of the spirit does
last. Love belonging to the spirit, and to the body as a result of
the spirit, is insinuated into the souls and minds of married
partners together with friendship and mutual trust. When
friendship and mutual trust join together with the first love in
marriage, married love results, which opens the partners’ hearts
and inspires in them the sweet enjoyments of love, and this more
and more deeply as friendship and trust are added to the original
love, and as that original love enters into this friendship and
trust and they into it.
- 162. [union takes place gradually]
- (7) A wife’s union with her husband’s
intellectual wisdom takes place inwardly, but with his moral wisdom
outwardly.-
- 163. [Intellectual wisdom]
163. (7) A wife’s union with her husband’s intellectual wisdom
takes place inwardly, but with his moral wisdom outwardly. Wisdom
in men is twofold, intellectual and moral, and their intellectual
wisdom has to do with their understanding alone, while their moral
wisdom has to do with both their understanding and at the same
time their life. This can be concluded and seen from simply
viewing the matter and examining it. Still, to have it known what
we mean by the intellectual wisdom of men, and what we mean by
their moral wisdom, we will list some specific examples:Various terms are used to designate those elements which have
to do with men’s intellectual wisdom. In general, they are called
knowledge, intelligence and wisdom. In particular, however, they
are rationality, judgment, genius, learning, sagacity. But because
everyone has special kinds of knowledge peculiar to him in his
occupation, these kinds of knowledge are therefore many and
various. For there are special kinds of knowledge peculiar to
clergymen, to civil officers, to their various officials, to
judges, to physicians and pharmacists, to soldiers and sailors, to
craftsmen and workmen, to farmers, and so on. To intellectual
wisdom belong also all the fields of study to which adolescents
are introduced in schools, and through which they are afterwards
led into intelligence; and these studies are also called by
various names, such as philosophy, physics, geometry, mechanics,
chemistry, astronomy, law, political science, ethics, history, and
many more, through which, as through gates, one enters into
intellectual pursuits, from which comes intellectual wisdom.
- 163. [Intellectual wisdom]
-
- 164. [Moral wisdom]
164. Elements having to do with moral wisdom in men, on the
other hand, are all moral virtues which have regard to the way
they live and which enter into their manner of life. And they
include as well spiritual virtues which spring from love toward
God and love for the neighbor, and which flow together into those
loves.Virtues which have to do with men’s moral wisdom likewise have
various names, and they are called temperance, sobriety,
integrity, kindliness, friendliness, modesty, honesty,
helpfulness, courteousness; also diligence, industriousness,
skillfulness, alacrity, generosity, liberality, magnanimity,
energy, courage, prudence – not to mention many others. Spiritual
virtues in men are love of religion, charity, truthfulness, faith,
conscience, innocence, as well as many more.These virtues, both moral and spiritual, can be attributed in
general to a man’s love and zeal for religion, for the public
good, for his country, for his fellow citizens, for his parents,
for his wife, and for his children. In all of these justice and
judgment prevail. Justice has to do with moral wisdom, and
judgment has to do with intellectual wisdom.
- 164. [Moral wisdom]
- 165. [Inward and outward union]
165. We say that a wife’s union with her husband’s intellectual
wisdom exists inwardly, because this wisdom is characteristic of
the intellect of men, and it ascends into a light in which women
are not. That is why women do not speak from it, but in gatherings
of men where matters like this are being discussed, they keep
silent and only listen. Nevertheless, wives still have these
things in them inwardly, as is apparent from the fact that they do
listen, inwardly recognizing and concurring with those things
which they hear and have heard from their husbands.On the other hand, a wife’s union with men’s moral wisdom
exists outwardly, because the virtues of this wisdom are akin for
the most part to similar virtues in women, and they spring from
the husband’s intellectual will, with which the wife’s will unites
and forms a marriage. And because a wife recognizes these virtues
in her husband better than he recognizes them in himself, we say
that a wife’s union with them exists outwardly.
-
- (8) In order that this union may be
achieved, a wife is given a perception of her husband’s affections,
and also the highest prudence in knowing how to moderate them.- 166. [Wives have perception]
166. (8) In order that this union may be achieved, a wife is
given a perception of her husband’s affections, and also the
highest prudence in knowing how to moderate them. This, too, is
one of the secrets of married love which wives conceal within and
keep to themselves – the fact that wives recognize their husbands’
affections and discreetly moderate them. They recognize these
affections through the three senses of sight, hearing and touch,
and they moderate them without their husbands’ being at all aware
of it.Now, because these are among things kept secret by wives, it is
not appropriate for me to reveal them in their particulars. It is,
however, appropriate for wives themselves, and therefore I have
included at the end of several chapters four narrative accounts in
which wives themselves reveal them. Two of the accounts come from
the three wives living in the hall on which I saw what seemed to
be golden rain falling.[*1] And the other two accounts come from
seven wives sitting in a rose garden.[*2] If these accounts are
read, this secret will be seen revealed.
- 166. [Wives have perception]
- (9) Wives keep this perception in them
hidden and conceal it from their husbands for reasons that are
necessary in building married love, friendship and trust, so that
they may have bliss in living together and happiness of life.- 167. [Wives hide their perception]
167. (9) Wives keep this perception in them hidden and conceal
it from their husbands for reasons that are necessary in building
married love, friendship and trust, so that they may have bliss in
living together and happiness of life. The hiding and concealing
by wives of their perception of their husbands’ affections is
called necessary, because if their perceptions became known, they
would alienate their husbands from bed, bedroom, and home. This is
because most men have in them a deep-seated coldness to marriage,
for many reasons, which will be disclosed in the chapter on the
reasons for states of coldness, separations and divorces 2 between
married partners.[*1] If wives were to divulge what they know of
their husbands’ affections and feelings, this coldness would break
out of its hiding places and chill first the inner recesses of the
mind, then the heart, and afterwards the outmost organs of love
which are dedicated to reproduction. And if these should become
cold, married love would be banished to such a degree that there
would remain no hope of friendship, trust, or bliss in living
together and thus no hope for happiness of life. Yet wives are
continually sustained by this hope. To reveal that they know the
affections and feelings of love in their husbands carries with it
a declaration and announcement of their own love; and it is well
known that to the extent wives open their mouths about this, to
the same extent their husbands grow cold and desire separation.This makes plain the truth of the premise, that wives keep
their perception in them hidden and conceal it from their husbands
for reasons that are necessary.[*1] See nos. 234ff.
- 167. [Wives hide their perception]
- (10) This perception is a wisdom that the
wife has. A man is not capable of it, neither is a wife capable of
her husband’s intellectual wisdom.- 168. [Perception is a wife’s wisdom]
168. (10) This perception is a wisdom that the wife has. A man
is not capable of it, neither is a wife capable of her husband’s
intellectual wisdom. This follows from the difference that exists
between masculinity and femininity. It is masculine to perceive
from the intellect, and feminine to perceive from love. Moreover,
the intellect also perceives those sorts of matters which
transcend the body and the world – it being the nature of
intellectual and spiritual sight to move in that direction – while
love does not perceive beyond what it feels. When it does, its
perception draws on its union with the intellect of a man, a union
established from creation. For the intellect has to do with light,
and love with warmth, and concerns that are matters of light are
seen, whereas concerns that are matters of warmth are felt.It is apparent from this that, because of the universal
difference which exists between masculinity and femininity, a
husband is not capable of his wife’s wisdom, nor is a wife capable
of her husband’s wisdom. Women are not even capable of a man’s
moral wisdom to the extent that it springs from his intellectual
wisdom.
- 168. [Perception is a wife’s wisdom]
- (11) A wife from her love continually thinks
about her husband’s disposition towards her, with a view to joining
him to her. This is not true of a husband.- 169. [A wife continually thinks about her
husband]169. (11) A wife continually thinks about her husband’s
disposition towards her, with a view to joining him to her. This
goes along with what was explained above, namely, that a desire to
unite her husband to her is constant and continual in a wife, but
inconstant and intermittent in a husband. See what was said
there.[*1] It follows from this that a wife thinks continually
about her husband’s disposition towards her with a view to joining
him to her. To be sure, a wife’s thinking about her husband is
interrupted by the domestic concerns which are under her care, but
still it remains in the affection of her love; and in women, this
affection does not become detached from their thoughts as it does
in men. However, I am relating these things as they were told to
me. See the two narrative accounts which come from seven wives
sitting in a rose garden, which I have included at the end of one
of the chapters later on.[*2][*1] No. 160.
- 169. [A wife continually thinks about her
- (12) A wife joins herself to her husband by
appeals to his will’s desires. - (13) A wife is joined to her husband by the
atmosphere of her life emanating from her love.- 171. [Her sphere connects them]
171. (13) A wife is joined to her husband by the atmosphere of
her life emanating from her love. From every person there
emanates, indeed pours, a spiritual atmosphere from the affections
of his love, and this atmosphere surrounds him. It also enters
into the natural atmosphere arising from the body, and the two
atmospheres combine together.Everyone knows that a natural atmosphere continually emanates
from the body, not only from human beings but also from animals –
in fact, from trees, fruits, flowers, and also metals. So, too, in
the spiritual world, except that the atmospheres emanating from
things there are spiritual, and the atmospheres which emanate from
spirits and angels are interiorly spiritual, because the
affections of their love and their consequent perceptions and
thoughts are interior. Every feeling of affinity or aversion has
its origin from these atmospheres, and also all association or
dissociation. Thus a person’s presence or absence depends in that
world on these atmospheres. For similarity or harmony in character
causes association and presence, while dissimilarity or disharmony
causes dissociation and absence. Consequently, it is these
atmospheres which cause distances in that world.Some people also know what effect these spiritual atmospheres
have in the natural world. The dispositions of married partners
toward each other come from this very origin. Harmonious and
concordant atmospheres unite them, and contrary and discordant
ones drive them apart; for concordant atmospheres are delightful
and pleasant, while discordant ones are undelightful and
unpleasant.[2] Angels have a clear perception of these atmospheres, and I
have heard from them that every single element in a person, both
inside and out, renews itself, which it does through processes of
dissolution and restoration; and this is what produces the
atmosphere which is continually given off. Moreover, the angels
said, this atmosphere is concentrated about a person’s back and
breast, but more lightly around the back, more densely around the
breast, and the atmosphere which is about the breast combines
itself with the breathing. That also is why two married partners
who differ in their dispositions and are out of harmony in their
affections, in bed lie turned away with their backs to each other,
while conversely, two who are in harmony in their dispositions and
affections lie turned toward each other.[3] The angels said further that because atmospheres emanate
from every part of a person and extend widely about him, these
atmospheres not only join or drive apart two married partners
outwardly, but also inwardly. And this, they said, is the reason
for all the differences and diversities in married love.Lastly the angels said that the atmosphere of love emanating
from a wife who is tenderly loved, in heaven is perceived as
sweetly fragrant, considerably more delightful than the one which
is perceived in the world by a newly married husband in the first
days of marriage.This makes plain the truth asserted, that a wife is joined to
her husband by the atmosphere of her life emanating from her love.
- 171. [Her sphere connects them]
- (14) A wife is joined to her husband by her
assimilation of the powers of his manhood, though this depends on
the spiritual love they have for each other.- 172. [She absorbs his seed]
172. (14) A wife is joined to her husband by her assimilation
of the powers of his manhood, though this depends on the spiritual
love they have for each other. That this is so is also something I
have gained from the testimony of angels. They said that the
seminal fluids expended by husbands are universally received by
their wives and added to the life in them, and that the wives in
consequence lead a life in harmony and in progressively greater
harmony with their husbands. Moreover, that the effect of this is
to bring about a union of souls and conjunction of minds. The
angels said that this is because a husband’s seminal fluid
contains his soul, and also his mind in respect to the interior
elements of it which have been joined to the soul.They said further that this has been provided from creation, in
order that a husband’s wisdom – which forms his soul – may be
assimilated into his wife, and that in this way they may become,
in the Lord’s words, one flesh. Also, that it has been provided as
well to keep the male of the species from abandoning his wife for
some imaginary reason after she has conceived.However, the angels added that occurrences of the utilization
and assimilation in wives of the life of their husbands are
contingent on their married love, because it is love, which is a
spiritual union, which joins two people together. And that this,
too, has been provided, for many reasons.
- 172. [She absorbs his seed]
- (15) A wife thus receives into herself an
image of her husband, and from it perceives, sees and feels his
affections.- 173. [She pictures him inwardly]
173. (15) A wife thus receives into herself an image of her
husband, and from it perceives, sees and feels his affections.
From the arguments presented above, it follows, as something
already attested, that wives receive into themselves matters that
have to do with the wisdom of their husbands, thus matters
belonging to their souls and minds, and in this way, from being
maidens, they turn themselves into wives. These are the arguments
from which this follows:1. Woman was created out of man.
2. Consequently, she has an inclination to unite and, so to
speak, reunite herself with a man.3. On account of and for the sake of that union with her mate,
a woman is born a form of love for a man, and she becomes more and
more a form of love for him by marriage, because her love then
continually devotes its thoughts to joining her husband to her.4. She is joined to her particular partner by appeals to his
life’s desires.5. Married partners are joined together by the atmospheres
surrounding them, which unite them overall and in every instance
according to the nature of the married love in the wives, and at
the same time according to the nature of the wisdom receiving that
love in the husbands.6. Married partners are also joined together by assimilations
of the husbands’ powers by the wives.7. From this it is apparent that something of the husband is
constantly being transfused into the wife and infused in her as
though it were hers.It follows from all this that an image of the husband is formed
in the wife, and that because of this image a wife perceives, sees
and feels in herself the things that are in her husband, and
herself therefore as being in him. She perceives from their
communication; she sees from looking at him; and she feels from
touching him. She feels the reception of her love by her husband
from the touch of her hands upon his cheeks, arms, hands and
breast – something that was revealed to me by the three wives in
the hall, and by seven wives in a rose garden, spoken of in the
narrative accounts.[*1]
- 173. [She pictures him inwardly]
- (16) A husband has duties appropriate to
him, and a wife duties appropriate to her, and a wife cannot enter
into duties appropriate to her husband or a husband into duties
appropriate to his wife and perform them properly.-
- 174. [Duties for each]
174. (16) A husband has duties appropriate to him, and a wife
duties appropriate to her, and a wife cannot enter into duties
appropriate to her husband or a husband into duties appropriate to
his wife and perform them properly. There is no need to illustrate
by recounting them that there are duties appropriate to a husband
and duties appropriate to a wife, for these are many and various
in nature. Moreover, everyone knows how to divide them into their
categories according to their general and specific kinds, provided
he directs his mind to seeing the difference between them. Duties
by which wives especially unite themselves with their husbands are
duties involved in the upbringing of little children of both
sexes, and of girls to the age when they are given in marriage.
- 174. [Duties for each]
- 175. [They cannot do the other’s duties]
175. We say that a wife cannot enter into duties appropriate to
her husband or conversely a husband into duties appropriate to his
wife, because they differ, like wisdom and its accompanying love,
or like thought and its accompanying affection, or like the
intellect and its accompanying will. In duties appropriate to
husbands, understanding, thought and wisdom play the primary role,
whereas in duties appropriate to wives, will, affection and love
play the primary role. A wife also performs her duties out of
will, affection and love, while her husband performs his out of
understanding, thought and wisdom. Consequently, their duties are
by nature different; but still they are progressively conjunctive
as time goes on.[2] Many people believe that women can perform the duties of
men if only they are introduced into them from early age in the
way that boys are. However, women can be introduced into the
exercise of these duties, but not into the judgment on which the
proper performance of these duties inwardly depends. Therefore,
those women who are introduced into the duties of men, in matters
of judgment are bound to go to men for advice; and then, from the
men’s recommendations, if they are their own mistresses, they
choose what accords with their love.[3] Some people also suppose that women can raise the sight of
their understanding into the same realm of light that men can and
see things on the same high level. They have been persuaded of
this opinion by what some educated female poets have written. But
when the works of these female poets were examined in their
presence in the spiritual world, they were found to be works, not
of judgment and wisdom, but of cleverness and a facility in the
use of language. And works which result from these two gifts,
because of the elegance and skill in the way the words are put
together, appear as though they were lofty and intelligent – but
only to people who take any kind of cleverness and call it wisdom.[4] We also say that men cannot enter into duties appropriate
to women and perform them properly, because they cannot enter into
the affections of women, which are completely different from the
affections of men. Since the affections and perceptions of the
male sex, from creation and thus by nature, have been made so
different, therefore the laws among the children of Israel also
included the following decree:A woman shall not have on the garment of a man, nor a man the
garment of a woman, for it is an abomination…. (Deuteronomy
22:5)The reason for this was that all in the spiritual world are
clothed according to their affections, and the two affections –
the affection of a woman and the affection of a man – cannot
become one except between the two sexes, and never is this
possible in one person.
-
- (17) These duties also join the two into
one, and at the same time make a single household, depending on the
assistance they render each other.- 176. [These duties join the two into one]
176. (17) These duties also join the two into one, and at the
same time make a single household, depending on the assistance
they render each other. One of the things people know in the world
is that a husband’s duties are in some way joined together with
the duties of his wife, and that a wife’s duties are connected to
the duties of her husband, and that these conjunctions and
connections are the assistance they give each other and depend on
that assistance.But the primary duties which confederate, affiliate, and bring
the souls and lives of two married partners together into one are
those which involve their joint concern in bringing up children.
In this concern a husband’s duties and a wife’s duties differ and
at the same time are joined together. They differ, because the
responsibility of suckling and bringing up little children of both
sexes, and also of educating girls to the age when they are handed
over to the custody of men and associate with them – this is a
responsibility having to do with the distinctive duty of a wife.
On the other hand, the responsibility of educating boys after
early childhood to the time of adolescence, and after that until
they become independent – this is a responsibility having to do
with the distinctive duty of a husband. Nevertheless, these duties
are joined together through the counsel, support, and many other
kinds of assistance that the two partners give each other.People know that these duties bind the hearts of two partners
together into one – both those duties which are joined together
and those which are different in nature, or those which are mutual
duties and those which are distinctive ones – and that this is
owing to the love called storg [*1] (the natural affection of
parents for their offspring). People also know that these duties,
viewed in respect to their difference and conjunction, make a
single household.[*1] From the Greek storg, pronounced stor”gee (like
psyche), in use in the 17th, 18th and 19th centuries to mean
natural or instinctive affection, usually that of parents for
their offspring, but no longer current.
- 176. [These duties join the two into one]
- (18) According as the aforementioned
conjunctions are formed, married partners become more and more one
person.- 177. [Married partners become more and more
one person]177. (18) According as the aforementioned conjunctions are
formed, married partners become more and more one person. This
accords with the observations contained in point (6), where we
explained that the union takes place gradually from the first days
of marriage, and that in people who are in a state of true married
love, it becomes deeper and deeper to eternity. See what was said
there. Married partners become proportionately one person in the
measure that their married love grows. And because, in heaven,
this love is genuine, owing to the celestial and spiritual life of
the angels, therefore two married partners there are called two
when they are referred to as husband and wife, but one when they
are referred to as angels.
- 177. [Married partners become more and more
- (19) Partners who are in a state of true
married love feel themselves to be a united person and as though one
flesh.- 178. [People in true married love feel like
one flesh]178. (19) Partners who are in a state of true married love feel
themselves to be a united person and as though one flesh. We can
confirm that this is so only from the declarations of people in
heaven, and not from the testimony of people on earth, since among
people on earth true married love does not presently exist. In
addition, people on earth are also enveloped in a coarse body,
which dulls and swallows up the sensation that the two partners
are a united person and virtually one flesh. And besides, people
in the world who love their partners only outwardly and not
inwardly do not wish to hear this. They think lasciviously
concerning it, too, in terms of the flesh. Not so in the case of
angels in heaven, because the married love they possess is
spiritual and celestial, and they are not clothed in as coarse a
body as people on earth.I have listened to angels who have lived with their partners in
heaven for centuries, and I have heard it attested by them that
they feel themselves to be united in this way, a husband with his
wife and a wife with her husband, and to be each in the other
mutually and reciprocally, seemingly, even, in respect to the
flesh, even if they are apart.[2] The reason for this phenomenon, rarely experienced on
earth, that the union of their souls and minds is felt in their
flesh – the reason for it, the angels said, is that the soul not
only forms the inmost elements in the head, but also the inmost
elements in the body. The same is true of the mind, which is
intermediate between the soul and the body. Although the mind
appears to be in the head, it nevertheless is actually in the
whole body as well. And that, the angels said, is why actions
which the soul and mind intend, instantaneously spring forth from
the body. It is also because of this, they said, that after the
body is cast off in the previous world, people themselves are
still whole and complete human beings. Now, because the soul and
mind are closely connected to the flesh of the body, in order that
they may act and produce their effects, it follows that a union of
the soul and mind with one’s married partner is felt even in the
body, as though they were one flesh.At the time the angels said this, there were some spirits
standing near, and I heard them comment that these were matters of
angelic wisdom that were beyond them. But these spirits were
intellectually natural, and not intellectually spiritual.
- 178. [People in true married love feel like
- (20) True married love regarded in itself is
a union of souls, a conjunction of minds, an effort to conjunction
in breasts, and a consequent effort to conjunction in body.- 179. [Union of souls]
179. (20) True married love regarded in itself is a union of
souls, a conjunction of minds, an effort to conjunction in
breasts, and a consequent effort to conjunction in body. That it
is a union of souls and conjunction of minds may be seen above in
no. 158. That it is an effort to conjunction in
breasts is because the breast is like a city’s town hall, and like
a royal court, and the body like the teeming city surrounding it.
The breast is like a city’s town hall because all decisions
delivered from the soul and mind to the body flow first into the
breast. It is like a royal court because it is the seat of
government over all things of the body; for that is where the
heart and lungs are, and the heart reigns through the blood in
every part of the body, and the lungs through the respiration. It
is apparent that the body is then like the teeming city
surrounding such places.Consequently, when the souls and minds of married partners are
united, and united by true married love, it follows that this
lovely union flows into their breasts, and through these into
their bodies, and causes an effort to conjunction. This is also
all the more so, because married love directs the effort to its
ultimate expressions, in order to bring its blissful pleasures to
fulfillment. And because the breast is at the midpoint, it is
apparent why married love has found the seat of its exquisite
sensation there.
- 179. [Union of souls]
- (21) The states produced by this love are
innocence, peace, tranquillity, inmost friendship, complete trust,
and a mutual desire in mind and heart to do the other every good;
also, as a result of all these, bliss, felicity, delight, pleasure,
and, owing to an eternal enjoyment of states like this, the
happiness of heaven.- 180. [States of true married love]
180. (21) The states produced by this love are innocence,
peace, tranquillity, inmost friendship, complete trust, a mutual
desire of the mind and heart to do the other every good; also, as
a result of all these, bliss, felicity, delight, pleasure, and,
owing to an eternal enjoyment of states like this, the happiness
of heaven. All of these states are inherent in married love and
consequently spring from it, and the reason is that married love
originates from the marriage between goodness and truth, and this
marriage comes from the Lord. Moreover, it is the nature of love
to will to share with another, indeed, to confer joys upon another
whom it loves from the heart, and to seek its own joys in return
from doing so; and this being the case, infinitely more,
therefore, does the Divine love in the Lord will to confer joys
upon mankind, whom He created to be recipients of both the love
and the wisdom emanating from Him. Because He created them to
receive these attributes – men to receive wisdom, women to receive
love for the wisdom of men – therefore on the deepest levels He
infused into people married love, to which he could impart all
kinds of bliss, felicity, delight and pleasure, states which,
together with life, emanate and flow in solely from the Lord’s
Divine love through His Divine wisdom. Consequently they flow into
people who are in a state of true married love, because they alone
are receptive of them.We list these states as innocence, peace, tranquillity, inmost
friendship, complete trust, and a mutual desire of the mind and
heart to do the other every good, since innocence and peace have
to do with the soul, tranquillity has to do with the mind, inmost
friendship has to do with the breast, complete trust has to do
with the heart, and a mutual desire of the mind and heart to do
the other every good has to do with the body as a result of these.
- 180. [States of true married love]
- (22) These blessings are not at all possible
except in a marriage of one man with one wife.- 181. [One man with one wife]
181. (22) These blessings are not at all possible except in a
marriage of one man with one wife. This follows as a conclusion
from everything that has been said previously, and it will also
follow as a conclusion from everything that remains to be said
hereafter. Consequently there is no need to support it with its
own special discussion.
- 181. [One man with one wife]
- Some sages of olden times in Greece on
people’s life after death (no. 182).- 182. [Ancient Greek sages]
182. To this I will append two narrative accounts. Here is the
first:Several weeks later[*1] I heard a voice from heaven saying,
“Behold, another assembly is convening on Parnassium hill.
Come, we will show you the way.”I went, and as I drew near, I saw on the hill Heliconeum
someone with a trumpet, with which he announced and proclaimed the
assembly. I also saw people from the city Athenaeum and its
bordering regions ascending as before, and in the midst of them
three newcomers from the world. The three were Christians, one a
priest, the second a politician, and the third a philosopher. On
the way the people entertained them with various kinds of
conversation, especially concerning the ancient wise men, whom
they mentioned by name. The visitors asked whether they would see
these wise men. The people said that they would, and that if they
wished, they would meet them, since they are friendly and cordial.The visitors asked about Demosthenes, Diogenes and Epicurus.
“Demosthenes is not here,” the people said, “but
with Plato.[*2] Diogenes stays with his disciples at the foot of
the hill Heliconeum, because he regards worldly matters as of no
importance and occupies his mind solely with heavenly ones.
Epicurus lives at the border to the west, and he does not come in
to join us either, because we draw a distinction between good
affections and evil ones, saying that good affections accompany
wisdom and that evil affections are opposed to wisdom.”[2] When they had ascended the hill Parnassium, some of the
keepers of the place brought crystal goblets containing water from
a spring there; and they said, “The water comes from a spring
which the people of old told stories about, saying that it was
broken open by the hoof of the horse Pegasus and afterwards became
sacred to the nine Muses.[*3] But by the winged horse Pegasus they
meant an understanding of truth which leads to wisdom. By its
hooves they meant empirical observations which lead to natural
intelligence. And by the nine Muses they meant learning and
knowledge of every kind. These stories today are called myths, but
they were allegories which the earliest people used to express
their ideas.”“Do not be surprised,” the people accompanying the
three visitors said to them. “The keepers have been told to
speak as they did, to explain that what we mean by drinking water
from the spring is to be taught about truths and through truths
about goods, and thus to become wise.”[3] After this they entered the Palladium, and with them went
the three newcomers from the world, the priest, the politician,
and the philosopher. Then the people with the laurel wreaths who
sat at the tables[*4] asked, “What news do you have from
earth?”So the newcomers replied, “We have this news. There is
someone who maintains that he speaks with angels, having had his
sight opened into the spiritual world, as open as the sight he has
into the natural world; and he reports from that world many novel
ideas, which include, among other things, the following: A person
lives, he says, as a person after death, the way he did before in
the world. He sees, hears, and speaks as he did before in the
world. He dresses and adorns himself as before in the world. He
becomes hungry and thirsty, and eats and drinks, as before in the
world. He experiences the delight of marriage as before in the
world. He goes to sleep and wakes up as before in the world. The
spiritual world has lands and lakes, mountains and hills, plains
and valleys, springs and rivers, gardens and groves. One finds
there palaces and houses, too, and cities and towns, just as in
the natural world. They have written documents and books as well,
and occupations and businesses, also precious stones, gold and
silver. In a word, one finds in that world each and every thing
that one finds on earth – things which are infinitely more perfect
in heaven. The only difference is that everything in the spiritual
world comes from a spiritual origin, and consequently is
spiritual, because it originates from the sun there, which is pure
love; while everything in the natural world comes from a natural
origin, and consequently is natural and material, because it comes
from the sun there, which is nothing but fire.“This person reports, in short, that a person after death
is perfectly human, indeed, more perfectly human than before in
the world. For before in the world he was clothed in a material
body, while here in this world he is clothed in a spiritual one.”[4] When the newcomers had thus spoken, the ancient wise men
asked what people on earth thought of these reports.The three visitors said, “We know that they are true,
because we are here and have seen and investigated them all. We
will tell you, therefore, what people said and judged concerning
them on earth.”At that the priest then said, “When those who are members
of our order first heard these reports, they called them
hallucinations, then fabrications; later they said he saw ghosts;
and finally they threw up their hands and said, believe if you
will. We have always taught that a person will not be clothed in a
body after death before the day of the Last Judgment.”The ancient wise men then asked, “Are there not any
intelligent ones among them who can show them and convince them of
the truth that a person lives as a person after death?”[5] The priest said that there were some who showed it to them,
but without convincing them. “The ones who show it say that
it is contrary to sound reason to believe that a person does not
live as a person until the day of the Last Judgment and meanwhile
is a soul without a body.“What is a person’s soul, they ask, and where is it in the
meantime? Is it an exhalation or a bit of wind flitting about in
the air, or some entity hidden away at the center of the earth
where its nether world is located? The souls of Adam and Eve, and
of all the people after them, for six thousand years or sixty
centuries now – are they still flitting about the universe or
still being kept shut up in the bowels of the earth, waiting for
the Last Judgment? What could be more distressing or more
miserable than having to wait like that? May their fate not be
likened to the fate of captives held chained and fettered in
prison? If that is to be what a person’s fate is like after death,
would it not be better to be born a donkey than a human being?“Moreover, is it not contrary to reason to suppose that a
soul can be clothed again with its body? Does the body not get
eaten away by worms, mice and fish? And this new body – can it
serve to cover a bony skeleton that has been charred by the sun or
has fallen into dust? How can these decomposed and foul-smelling
elements be gathered together and joined to souls?“But when people hear arguments like these, they do not
use reason to respond to them, but hold to their belief, saying,
“We keep reason in obedience to faith.” As for all
people being gathered together from their graves on the day of the
Last Judgment, this, they say, is a work of omnipotence. And when
they use the terms omnipotence and faith, reason is banished; and
I can tell you that sound reason is as nothing then, and to some
of them, a kind of hallucination. Indeed, it is possible for them
to say in reply to sound reason, “You are crazy.””[6] When the wise men of Greece heard this, they said, “Are
logical inconsistencies like that not dispelled of themselves as
mutually contradictory? And yet sound reason cannot dispel them in
the world today. What can be more logically inconsistent than to
believe what they say about the Last Judgment, that the universe
will then come to an end and that at the same time the stars of
heaven will fall down on to the earth, which is smaller than the
stars; and that people’s bodies, being then either cadavers, or
embalmed corpses other people may have eaten,[*5] or particles of
dust, will come together with their souls?“When we were in the world, we believed in the immortality
of human souls on the basis of inductive arguments which reason
supplied us, and we also determined places for the blessed, which
we called the Elysian Fields. And we believed these souls to be
human forms or likenesses, but ethereal since they were
spiritual.”[7] After they said this, they turned to the second visitor,
who in the world had been a politician. He confessed that he had
not believed in a life after death, and had thought concerning the
new reports he began to hear about it that they were fictions and
fabrications. “Thinking about it I said, how can souls be
corporeal beings? Does not every remnant of a person lie dead in
the grave? Is the eye not there? How can he see? Is the ear not
there? How can he hear? Where does he get a mouth with which to
speak? If anything of a person should live after death, would it
be anything other than something ghostlike? How can a ghost eat
and drink? And how can it experience the delight of marriage?
Where does it get its clothing, housing, food, and so on? Besides,
being airy apparitions, ghosts only appear as though they exist,
and yet do not.“These and others like them are the thoughts I had in the
world concerning the life of people after death. But now that I
have seen it all and touched it all with my hands, I have been
convinced by my very senses that I am as much a person as I was in
the world, so much so that I have no other awareness than that I
am living as I did then, with the difference that I now reason
more sensibly. I have sometimes been ashamed of the thoughts I had
before.”[8] The philosopher had a similar story to tell about himself,
with the difference, however, that he had classed these new
reports he heard regarding life after death with other opinions
and conjectures he had gathered from ancient and modern sources.The sages were dumbfounded at hearing this; and those who were
of the Socratic school said they perceived from this news from
earth that the inner faculties of human minds had become gradually
closed, with faith in falsity now shining like truth in the world,
and clever foolishness like wisdom. Since our times, they said,
the light of wisdom has descended from the inner regions of the
brain to the mouth beneath the nose, where it appears to view as a
brilliance of the lips, and the speech of the mouth therefore as
wisdom.Listening to this, one of the novices there said, “Yes,
and how stupid the minds of earth’s inhabitants are today! If only
we had here the disciples of Heraclitus who weep over everything
and the disciples of Democritus who laugh at everything. What
great weeping and laughing we would hear then!”At the conclusion of this assembly, they gave the three
newcomers from earth emblems of their district, which were copper
plaques on which some hieroglyphic symbols were engraved. With
these the visitors then departed.[*1] I.e., several weeks after the occurrence related in nos.
151[r]–154[r].[*2] See no. 151[r]:1.
[*3] Cf., in Greek mythology, the spring Hippocrene on Mount
Helicon, and perhaps also the spring Castalia on Mount Parnassus.[*4] See no. 151[r]:2.
[*5] As late as the seventeenth and eighteenth centuries, the
substances of embalmed corpses, particularly of Egyptian mummies,
were used in the preparation of potions and powders prescribed and
taken for a variety of supposed medicinal purposes. Cf. True
Christian Religion no. 160:5; also nos. 693:6,
770.
- 182. [Ancient Greek sages]
- A wedding garden called Adramandoni, where a
conversation took place on the influx of married love (no. 183).- 183. [A wedding garden]
183. The second account:
A grove of palms and laurels appeared to me in the eastern
zone, with the trees planted in rings in the form of spirals.
Going over, I entered and walked along paths that curved around
through several of the rings, and at the end of the paths I saw a
garden, which formed the heart of the grove. Between the grove and
the garden stood a small bridge, having a gate on the grove side
and another gate on the garden side. I approached, and a keeper
opened the gates. When I asked him what the name of the garden
was, he said, “Adramandoni, which means the delight of
married love.”I went in, and behold, I found olive trees, with vines running
and hanging down from one tree to another, and with bushes in
flower beneath the trees and between them. In the middle of the
garden there was a grassy circle, on which husbands and wives and
young men and women were sitting, paired off in couples; and at
the center of the circle was an elevated piece of ground, where a
little fountain of water spurted up into the air owing to the
force of its stream.When I moved closer to the circle, I saw two angels in purple
and scarlet, who were speaking with the people sitting on the
grass and talking about married love, its origin and its delights.
And because this love was the subject of their conversation, the
people were listening with eager attention and full receptivity,
producing in them a feeling of exaltation as though from the fire
of love in the speech of the angels.[2] I have condensed into summary form the following excerpts
from their conversation:The angels began by remarking how difficult it is to
investigate and discern the origin of married love, since it has a
Divine origin in heaven; for the origin is Divine love, Divine
wisdom, and Divine application to useful purpose. These three
emanate as one from the Lord, and they flow as one from Him into
people’s souls, and through their souls into their minds; and
there they flow into the inner affections and thoughts, through
these into desires nearer the body, and from these through the
breast into the reproductive region. Here all the forces derived
from the first origin exist concurrently, and together with
successive elements, result in married love.After this the angels said, “Let the interchange in our
discussion be by questions and answers, because although a
perception of something does indeed flow in when gained solely
from listening, still it does not remain unless the listener also
thinks about it for himself and asks questions regarding it.”[3] Then some of the married group said to the angels, “We
have heard that married love has a Divine origin in heaven,
because it comes from an influx from the Lord into people’s souls;
and that being from the Lord, its origin is love, wisdom, and
application to useful purpose – these being the three essential
attributes which together make up the one Divine essence. We have
also heard that nothing but what is of the Divine essence can
emanate from the Lord and flow into the inmost being of a person,
which is called his soul; and that these three essential
attributes of it are transformed into analogous and corresponding
qualities as they descend into the body. So now, the first
question we ask is what is meant by the third essential Divine
emanation, which is called application to useful purpose.”The angels replied that love and wisdom without application to
useful purpose are only abstract and theoretical ideas, which,
even after being entertained for a time in the mind, eventually
pass away like the winds. “But love and wisdom are brought
together in application to useful purpose,” they said, “and
in this they become a single entity which is called actual. Love
cannot rest unless it acts, for love is the active force in life;
nor can wisdom exist and endure unless it does so from love and
together with love whenever love acts, and to act is application
to useful purpose. Therefore we define application to useful
purpose as the doing of good from love through wisdom. Application
to useful purpose is what good is.[4] “Since these three elements – love, wisdom, and
application to useful purpose – flow into people’s souls, we can
see why it is said that all good is from God. For all action from
love through wisdom is called good, and action includes also
application to useful purpose.“Love without wisdom – what is it but a kind of foolish
infatuation? And love accompanied by wisdom, but without
application to a useful end – what is it but an airy affectation
of the mind? On the other hand, love and wisdom together with
application to a useful end – these not only make a person what he
is, but they also are the person. Indeed, what may perhaps
surprise you, they produce the person. For a man’s seed contains
his soul in perfect human form, clothed with substances from the
finest elements of nature, out of which the body is formed in the
womb of the mother. This useful end is the supreme and final end
of Divine love acting through Divine wisdom.”[5] Finally the angels said, “We reach the inevitable
conclusion that all reproduction, all propagation, and all
procreation stem in origin from an influx of love, wisdom, and
application to useful purpose flowing in from the Lord – from a
direct influx from the Lord into the souls of human beings, from
an indirect influx into the souls of animals, and from a still
more indirect influx into the inmost elements in plants. All these
processes, moreover, take place in things that are last in order
as a result of things that are first in order.“Processes of reproduction, propagation and procreation
are clearly continuations of creation; for creation can have no
other source than Divine love acting through Divine wisdom in
Divine application to useful purpose. Everything in the universe
is therefore generated and formed as a result of useful purpose,
in fulfillment of useful purpose, and to serve a useful purpose.”[6] Afterwards the people sitting on the banks of grass asked
the angels, “What is the source of the delights of married
love, delights which are beyond number and description?”The angels replied that these delights arise from the useful
applications of love and wisdom, and that this could be seen from
considering that to the extent anyone loves to become wise for the
sake of some genuinely useful purpose, to the same extent he is in
the stream and vigor of married love, and to the extent he is in
this stream and vigor, to the same extent he enjoys their
delights.“Application to useful purpose produces this result,”
they said, “because love [finds expression in useful purpose]
through wisdom [and they] take delight in each other, and play
with each other, so to speak, like little children. And as they
mature, they congenially unite together, which is accomplished as
though through stages of betrothal, wedding, marriage and the
bearing of offspring, and this continually and with variety to
eternity.“These conjunctions between love and wisdom take place
inwardly in application to useful purpose. In their beginnings,
however, the delights are imperceptible, but they become more and
more perceptible as they descend by degrees from their beginnings
and enter the body. They enter by degrees from the soul into the
interior regions of a person’s mind, and from there into its outer
regions, and from there to within the breast, and 7from there into
the reproductive region. And though a person does not perceive
anything of these conjugal and heavenly interplays in the soul,
from the soul they insinuate themselves into the inner regions of
the mind in the form of peace and innocence, and into the outer
regions of the mind in the form of bliss, felicity and delight,
while within the breast they appear in the form of the delights of
inmost friendship, and in the reproductive region as the delight
of delights owing to the continual influx all the way from the
soul, bringing with it an actual sensation of married love.“Such conjugal interplays of love and wisdom in
application to useful purpose in the soul become lasting as they
proceed towards their place within the breast, and there within
the breast they manifest themselves perceptibly in an infinite
variety of delights. And because of the marvelous communication of
the interior of the breast with the reproductive region, in that
region the delights become the delights of married love – delights
which are heightened over all other delights that exist in heaven
and in the world, because the use served by married love is the
most excellent use of all; for it results in the propagation of
the human race, and from the human race comes the angelic heaven.”[8] To this the angels added that people know nothing about the
variety of the countless delights connected with true married love
if they do not have from the Lord a love of growing wise for the
sake of some useful purpose. “For,” they said, “people
who do not love to become wise in accord with genuine truths, but
prefer to be irrational in accord with falsities, and who through
this irrationality of theirs are motivated by some love to serve
evil purposes – in their case the way to the soul is closed. As a
result the conjugal and heavenly interplays of love and wisdom in
the soul become more and more cut off, and together with them,
married love with its flow, vigor, and delights.”The people who were listening said in response that they
perceived that married love depends on a love from the Lord of
growing wise for the sake of useful purposes. The angels replied
that this was so. And then on the heads of some of the listeners
appeared little wreaths of flowers.So they asked, “Why is this?”
The angels said, “Because you understood more deeply.”
And then the angels departed from the garden, with these people in
the midst of them.
- 183. [A wedding garden]
-
- 184. THE CHANGE IN THE STATE OF LIFE IN MEN
AND WOMEN MADE BY MARRIAGE-
- 184. [LIFE CHANGES]
What is meant by states of life and their changes is well known
to people who are educated and wise, but unknown to those who are
uneducated and simple. Therefore we need to make some preliminary
statement about the subject.The state of a person’s life is its character. Further, because
every person has in him two faculties which form his life,
faculties which are called intellect and will, the state of a
person’s life is its character in relation to his intellect and
will. It is apparent from this that changes in one’s state of life
mean changes in its character in respect to elements having to do
with the intellect and elements having to do with the will.In this chapter we undertake to show that every person is
continually changing in these two respects, but with a difference
in the kinds of changes before marriage and those after marriage.
We will do this in the following order:(1) From infancy to the end of life, and afterwards to eternity,
a person’s state of life is continually changing.(2) So, too, the internal form, which is the form of his spirit.
(3) These changes are of one kind in men and of another kind in
women, since from creation men are forms of knowledge, intelligence
and wisdom, and women forms of love for these things in men.(4) In men the mind is elevated into a higher light, and in
women the mind is elevated into a higher warmth; moreover, a woman
feels the delights of her warmth in the light of a man.(5) The states of life in men and women before marriage and
their states of life after marriage are different.(6) After marriage, the states of life in married partners
change and progress according to the bonds formed between their
minds by married love.(7) Marriage even induces different forms on the souls and minds
of the partners.(8) A woman is actually transformed into a man’s wife according
to the description in the book of creation.(9) This transformation is accomplished by the wife in secret
ways, which is what is meant by woman’s having been created while
the man slept.(10) This transformation is accomplished by the wife by a union
of her will with the inner will of her husband.(11) This to the end that the will of the one and the will of
the other may become one will, and the two partners thus one
person.(12) This transformation is accomplished by the wife by an
adoption of her husband’s affections.(13) This transformation is accomplished by the wife by her
reception of the propagations of her husband’s soul with delight –
a delight arising from her willing to be an embodiment of love for
her husband’s wisdom.(14) A maiden is thus transformed into a wife, and a youth into
a husband.(15) In a marriage of one man with one wife, in which there is a
true married love between them, the wife becomes more and more a
wife, and the husband more and more a husband.(16) Their forms are also thus progressively perfected and
ennobled from within.(17) The offspring born of couples who are in a state of true
married love derive from their parents a conjugal connection
between good and truth, from which they have an inclination and
faculty, if a son, to perceive matters having do to with wisdom, if
a daughter, to love the things that wisdom teaches.(18) This occurs because the soul of the offspring comes from
its father, and its clothing from its mother.Explanation of these statements now follows.
- 184. [LIFE CHANGES]
- (1) From infancy to the end of life, and
afterwards to eternity, a person’s state of life is continually
changing.- 185. [Life is always changing]
185. (1) From infancy to the end of life, and afterwards to
eternity, a person’s state of life is continually changing. The
general states of a person’s life are called infancy, childhood,
adolescence, adulthood, and old age. People know that every person
who continues to live in the world passes in turn from one age to
the next, and so progresses from the first one to the last. A
person’s passing from one age to another is not apparent until a
period of time has intervened; nevertheless, reason sees that the
transitions are progressive from moment to moment, thus that they
are advancing continually. For the case is similar with a person
as with a tree, which from the time the seed is cast into the
ground keeps on developing and growing every little instant, even
the very briefest. These moment-to-moment progressions are also
changes of state, for a later progression adds something to the
preceding one which perfects the state.[2] Changes that take place in a person’s inner qualities are
more perfectly continuous than those that take place in his
outward ones. The reason is that a person’s inner qualities – by
which we mean those that belong to his mind or spirit – are raised
up on a higher level than the outward ones; and in things that are
on a higher level, thousands of changes occur in the same moment
that only one does in the outer elements. The changes that take
place in the inner qualities are changes in the state of the will
in respect to its affections, and changes in the state of the
intellect in respect to its thoughts. Progressive changes in the
state of these affections and thoughts are what are particularly
meant under this heading.[3] Changes in the state of these two life forces or faculties
in a person are unceasing, continuing from infancy to the end of
his life, and afterwards to eternity; and the reason is that there
is no limit to knowledge, even less to intelligence, and still
less to wisdom. For there is an infinity and eternity in the range
of these, arising from the Infinite and Eternal who is their
source. Hence the ancient philosophical tenet, that everything is
capable of being divided to infinity; to which should be added
that everything is similarly capable of being multiplied. The
angels assert that they are perfected in wisdom by the Lord to
eternity, which means also to infinity, since eternity is an
infinity of time.
- 185. [Life is always changing]
- (2) So, too, the internal form, which is the
form of his spirit.- 186. [We change on the inside, too.]
186. (2) So, too, the person’s internal form, which is the form
of his spirit. This form is continually changing as the state of a
person’s life changes, because nothing exists without being in
some form, and its state is what induces the form. It amounts to
the same thing, therefore, whether one says that the state of a
person’s life changes or that his form does. A person’s affections
and thoughts all exist in forms, and so depend on forms, for forms
are their vessels. If they did not exist in vessels that have
form, affections and thoughts might be found even in skulls from
which the brain has been removed. It would be like having sight
without an eye, hearing without an ear, or taste without a tongue.
People know that the vessels of these senses exist and that the
vessels are forms.[2] We say that the state of life, and therefore the form in a
person, is continually changing, because it is a truth – which the
wise have taught and still teach – that no two things are ever the
same or absolutely identical, still less a number of things. So,
for example, no two human faces are ever identical, still less
several of them. It is similar in the case of successive states,
that no later state of life is ever the same as one gone by. It
follows from this that there is a perpetual change in the state of
life in a person, consequently also a perpetual change in his
form, especially in the form of his inner qualities.Since these observations, however, do not teach anything about
marriage, but only prepare the way for concepts connected with it,
and since they are no more than philosophical and intellectual
analyses, which some people find difficult to grasp, having made
these few comments we therefore pass on.
- 186. [We change on the inside, too.]
- (3) These changes are of one kind in men and
of another kind in women, since from creation men are forms of
knowledge, intelligence and wisdom, and women forms of love for
these things in men.- 187. [Men and women change differently]
187. (3) These changes are of one kind in men and of another
kind in women, since from creation men are forms of knowledge,
intelligence and wisdom, and women forms of love for these things
in men. We have already shown that men were created to be forms of
understanding and that women were created to be forms of love for
the understanding of men, as may be seen above in nos. 90,
91. It follows that the changes of state which
take place successively in him and in her from infancy to maturity
are for the sake of perfecting their forms – an intellect-oriented
form in men, and a will-oriented form in women. That is why we say
that the changes are of one kind in men and of another kind in
women.In both men and women, however, the outer form that has to do
with the body is perfected according to the perfection of the
inner form which has to do with the mind; for the mind acts upon
the body, and not the reverse. This is the reason children in
heaven grow up with a stature and comeliness in accordance with
the growth of intelligence in them – differently from children on
earth, because children on earth are clothed in a material body,
as animals are.Nevertheless, children in heaven and children on earth are
alike in this, that in their development they are attracted at
first to such things as appeal to their physical senses, then
little by little to such things as affect their inner
contemplative sense, and by degrees to such things as infuse their
will with affection. Then, when they reach an age midway between
immaturity and maturity, they develop an attraction towards
marriage, which in a young woman is an attraction towards a young
man, and in a young man, towards a young woman.But because young women in heaven, just as on earth, from an
innate discretion conceal their inclinations towards marriage, the
young men there do not know otherwise than that they inspire
feelings of love in the young women, and this also appears to them
to be so because of their masculine urge. However, even this urge
in them is caused by an influx of love emanating from the fair
sex, an influx which we will take up expressly elsewhere.[*1]From this appears the truth of the argument: that changes of
state are of one kind in men and of another kind in women, since
from creation men are forms of knowledge, intelligence and wisdom,
and women forms of love for these things in men.
- 187. [Men and women change differently]
- (4) In men the mind is elevated into a
higher light, and in women the mind is elevated into a higher
warmth; moreover, a woman feels the delights of her warmth in the
light of a man.-
- 188. [Men find higher light and women higher
warmth]188. (4) In men the mind is elevated into a higher light, and
in women the mind is elevated into a higher warmth; moreover, a
woman feels the delights of her warmth in the light of a man. By
the light into which men are elevated we mean intelligence and
wisdom, because spiritual light, which emanates from the sun of
the spiritual world (a sun which in its essence is love), goes
together with these two as one and the same thing. Moreover, by
the warmth into which women are elevated we mean married love,
because spiritual warmth, which emanates from the sun of that
world, in its essence is love, and in women is love that unites
itself with the intelligence and wisdom in men. Taken in its
broadest terms, this is the definition of married love, and when
given a specific focus it becomes married love.[2] We call it an elevation into a higher light and warmth,
because it is an elevation into the light and warmth in which
angels of the higher heavens are. It is also an actual ascent, as
though from a mist into open air, and from a lower region of the
air into a higher one, and from this into the upper atmosphere.
Therefore the elevation into a higher light in men is an elevation
into higher intelligence and from this into wisdom, in which there
is possible a still higher and higher ascent. And on the other
hand, the elevation into a higher warmth in women is an elevation
into a more and more chaste and pure married love, and this
continually towards the married ideal which from creation is
innate in their inmost beings.[3] Regarded in themselves, these elevations are openings of
the mind; for the human mind is divided into regions, as the world
is in respect to its atmospheres (the lowest of which is the
aqueous one, the next higher the aerial one, the next higher still
the ethereal one, above which there is also a highest one). A
person’s mind is elevated into similar regions as it is opened –
as it is opened in men by wisdom, and in women by true married
love.
- 188. [Men find higher light and women higher
- 189. [The interplay of light and warmth is in
organic forms]189. We say that a woman feels the delights of her warmth in
the light of a man; but what we mean is that a woman feels the
delights of her warmth in the wisdom of a man, because wisdom is
what receives it, and love has its pleasures and delights when it
finds this reception in something corresponding to itself. This
does not mean, however, that warmth has pleasure with its light
apart from forms, but in them. And all the more does spiritual
warmth have pleasure with spiritual light in them, because it is
from wisdom and love that these forms are alive and thus
responsive.This can be illustrated to some extent by the so-called
interplays of warmth with light in plants. Apart from these forms
there is only a simple conjunction of warmth and light, but in
them there is an interplay, so to speak, between the two, because
there they are in forms or recipient vessels. For they penetrate
the plant forms through marvelous little winding ways, and in the
inmost parts work to produce fruits of use, and they also give off
their pleasant exhalations into the surrounding air, which they
fill with fragrance.Even more striking still is the delightful interplay of
spiritual warmth with spiritual light in human forms, where the
warmth is married love and the light is wisdom.
-
- (5) The states of life in men and women
before marriage and their states of life after marriage are
different.- 190. [Marriage changes people]
190. (5) The states of life in men and women before marriage
and their states of life after marriage are different. Before
marriage each sex goes through two states, one state preceding the
inclination towards marriage, the other following it. Changes in
these two states and the resulting transformations of their minds
develop in a progressive sequence according to continual growths
in these states. We do not have the space, however, to describe
these changes here, for they are various and diverse in the people
who undergo them.Essentially, inclinations towards marriage prior to marriage
are only something that can be imagined in the mind, which then
become more and more something that can be felt in the body. On
the other hand, the states these inclinations lead to after
marriage are states of union and also of procreation. Clearly,
these latter states differ from the former ones as realizations do
from intentions.
- 190. [Marriage changes people]
- (6) After marriage, the states of life in
married partners change and progress according to the bonds formed
between their minds by married love.- 191. [The changes depend on their attachment]
191. (6) After marriage, the states of life in married partners
change and progress according to the bonds formed between their
minds by married love. In each partner, man and wife, the changes
of state and progressions of state after marriage depend on the
kind of married love they have, being thus changes and
progressions that tend either to join or to estrange their minds;
and the reason is that married love not only varies but also
swings back and forth in the partners. It varies in partners who
inwardly love each other, for although it goes through cycles in
which it is interrupted in them, nevertheless it constantly
retains its warmth within. This love swings back and forth,
however, in partners who love each other only outwardly; in them
this love goes through cycles in which it is interrupted, not
owing to the same causes, but as a result of 2alternating states
of warmth and coldness. The reason for these differences is that
in the latter case the body plays the leading part, and its state
of heat wells up and forcibly carries off the lower parts of the
mind into confederation with it. But in the case of people who
love each other inwardly, the mind plays the leading part, and it
brings the body into a confederation with it.It seems as though love ascends from the body into the soul,
because as soon as the body lights on attractions, these enter
through the doors of the eyes, so to speak, into the mind, thus
through the entryway of the sight into the thoughts and there
immediately into the love. But nevertheless, love descends from
the mind and acts on the lower parts according to the way they are
directed. A lascivious mind acts lasciviously, therefore, and a
chaste mind chastely; and in the latter case the mind directs and
governs the body, whereas in the preceding case it is directed and
governed by the body.
- 191. [The changes depend on their attachment]
- (7) Marriage even induces different forms on
the souls and minds of the partners.- 192. [Marriage changes their souls and minds]
192. (7) Marriage even induces different forms on their souls
and minds. In the natural world one cannot observe that marriage
induces different forms on their souls and minds, because souls
and minds are there enveloped in a material body, and the mind is
rarely visible through this. In today’s world, moreover, more than
in ancient times, people also learn from early childhood to assume
expressions on their faces which completely conceal the affections
of their minds.For this reason, one cannot see the difference between what the
forms of their minds are like before marriage and what they are
like afterwards. Nevertheless, it is clearly apparent from souls
and minds in the spiritual world that the forms of these after
marriage are different from what they had been before; for people
are then spirits and angels, who are nothing else than minds and
souls in human form, divested of the integuments they had had,
which were composed of elements found in waters and earths and of
exhalations from these diffused in the air. When these coverings
have been cast off, the forms of their minds, and what these forms
had been like within their bodies, become visible; and it is
clearly seen then that the forms in people who are married are
different from the forms in people who are not.In general, the faces of married partners possess an inner
beauty, the husband receiving from his wife the lovely blush of
her love, and the wife receiving from her husband the shining
splendor of his wisdom. For a married couple there is united in
respect to their souls; and one also sees in the two a full
expression of what it is to be human. This is the case in heaven,
because marriages do not exist elsewhere. Beneath heaven one finds
instead only temporary alliances which are formed and broken.
- 192. [Marriage changes their souls and minds]
- (8) A woman is actually transformed into a
man’s wife according to the description in the book of creation.- 193. [This follows the creation of Eve from
Adam]193. (8) A woman is actually transformed into a wife according
to the description in the book of creation. We are told in this
book that woman was created from the rib of a man, and that when
she was brought to him, the man said,She…is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be
called “Ishshah (Woman) because she was taken from “Ish
(Man). (Genesis 2:22-24)In the Word, a rib from the breast symbolically means, in its
spiritual sense, not a rib but natural truth. This is the
symbolism of the ribs which the bear carried between its teeth in
Daniel 7:5; for bears symbolize people who read the Word in its
natural sense and see truths there without understanding. The
breast of a man symbolizes that essential and distinctive quality
which makes it different in character from the breast of a woman.
This quality is wisdom, as may be seen above in no. 187;
for truth supports wisdom, as a rib supports the breast. These
distinctive qualities are symbolized, because the breast is where
all the qualities of a person are, so to speak, at their center.[2] It follows from this that woman was created from man by a
transmission and replication of his distinctive wisdom, which is
formed from natural truth, and that man’s love for this wisdom was
transferred to woman so as to become married love; moreover, that
the purpose of this was to replace love of self in man with love
for his wife, who, from a nature innate in her, cannot help but
turn the love of self in man to his love for her. I have been
told, too, that this comes about as a result of the wife’s love,
without either the man or the wife being conscious of it. It is
because of this that no one is ever able to love his partner with
a true married love so long as he is possessed of a conceit in his
own intelligence from a love of self.[3] Once this secret of the creation of woman from man has been
understood, it can be seen that in marriage a woman is similarly
created or formed, so to speak, from her husband, and that this
transformation is brought about by the wife – or rather, through
the wife by the Lord, who infuses into women the inclination to
achieve it. For a wife receives into her an image of her husband
by assimilating his affections into her (see above, no. 173);
by uniting the internal will of her husband with hers (concerning
which below); and also by incorporating into her the propagations
of his soul (of which also below).It is apparent from this that a woman is transformed into a
wife according to the description in the book of creation
understood in respect to its inner meaning, and that she is
transformed through the qualities she takes from her husband and
his “breast” and implants in herself.
- 193. [This follows the creation of Eve from
- (9) This transformation is accomplished by
the wife in secret ways, which is what is meant by woman’s having
been created while the man slept.- 194. [The wife does this in secret]
194. (9) This transformation is accomplished by the wife in
secret ways, which is what is meant by woman’s having been created
while the man slept. We read in the book of creation that Jehovah
God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam so that he slept, and that
He then took one of the man’s ribs and fashioned it into a woman
(Genesis 2:21,22). This sleep and the man’s sleeping symbolize a
man’s complete ignorance that his wife is transformed and, so to
speak, created from him. This is apparent from observations made
in the preceding chapter, and also in this one, respecting wives’
innate discretion and prudence not to divulge anything of their
love, not even of their adopting their husband’s life’s affections
and of their thus transfusing his wisdom into them. It is clear
from what we presented before in nos. 166-168ff
that a wife does this without her husband’s knowing and while he
is, so to speak, asleep, thus that she does it in secret ways. We
also showed in the same numbers that the prudence needed to
accomplish it is instinctive in women from creation, thus from
birth, for reasons that are necessary in building married love,
friendship and trust, so that the two may have bliss in living
together and happiness of life.In order that this may come about as it should, therefore, it
was enjoined on man that he leave father and mother and cling to
his wife(Genesis 2:24, Matthew 19:4,5). [2] The father and mother
a man is to leave mean, in a spiritual sense, the inherent nature
of his will and the inherent nature of his intellect (the inherent
nature of a person’s will being to love itself, and the inherent
nature of a person’s intellect being to love its own wisdom). And
to cling means to commit himself to love of his wife. These two
inherent natures are evil and deadly to a man if they remain in
him, but the love arising from the two is turned into married love
as a man clings to his wife, that is, as he acquires a love for
her, as may be seen just above in no. 193, and
elsewhere.(It can be amply demonstrated from passages elsewhere in the
Word that to be asleep symbolically means to be unaware or
oblivious; that father and mother symbolically mean the two
inherent natures of a person, one of the will and one of the
intellect; and that to cling symbolically means to commit oneself
to love for something. But it would be out of place to do it
here.)
- 194. [The wife does this in secret]
- (10) This transformation is accomplished by
the wife by a union of her will with the inner will of her husband.- 195. [The wife unites with her husband’s
inner will]195. (10) This transformation is accomplished by the wife by a
union of her will with the inner will of her husband. It may be
seen above in nos. 163-165 that a man has an
intellectual wisdom and a moral wisdom, and that a wife unites
herself with those qualities in her husband that have to do with
his moral wisdom. Qualities that are matters of intellectual
wisdom form a man’s understanding, and qualities that are matters
of moral wisdom form his will. A wife unites herself with those
qualities which form her husband’s will. (Whether one says that a
wife unites herself, or that she unites her will, with the will of
her husband, it amounts to the same thing, because a wife is born
will-oriented, and therefore she does what she does in accord with
her will.)We say that it is a union with her husband’s inner will,
because a man’s will has its seat in his intellect, and the
intellectual quality of man is the inmost quality in woman, in
accordance with observations we have made before, in no. 32
and several times since, regarding the formation of woman from
man. Men also have an outward will, but this very frequently comes
of pretense or concealment. A wife sees it, but she does not unite
herself with it, except perhaps in a feigned or playful way.
- 195. [The wife unites with her husband’s
- (11) This to the end that the will of the
one and the will of the other may become one will, and the two
partners thus one person.- 196. [Two become one]
196. (11) This to the end that the will of the one and the will
of the other may become one will, and the two partners thus one
person. This is the goal, for anyone who joins the will of another
to himself also joins to himself the other’s intellect. Indeed,
regarded in itself, the intellect is only a servant and agent of
the will. The fact of this is clearly apparent from the way an
affection arising from love impels the intellect to think as it
bids. Every affection arising from love is a property of the will,
for what a person loves, this he also wills.It follows from this that anyone who joins the will of another
person to himself, joins to himself the whole person. That is why
it is instinctive in a wife’s love to unite her husband’s will to
her own, for in this way the wife becomes one who belongs to her
husband, and the husband one who belongs to his wife. Thus the two
become one person.
- 196. [Two become one]
- (12) This transformation is accomplished by
the wife by an adoption of her husband’s affections.- 197. [Adopting her husband’s affections]
197. (12) This transformation is accomplished by an adoption of
the husband’s affections. This point goes along with the two
preceding discussions, since affections are matters of the will.
For affections are simply the offspring of love, and they form the
will, molding it and composing it. In men, however, these
affections reside in the intellect, whereas in women they reside
in the will.
- 197. [Adopting her husband’s affections]
- (13) This transformation is accomplished by
the wife by her reception of the propagations of her husband’s soul
with delight – a delight arising from her willing to be an
embodiment of love for her husband’s wisdom.- 198. [Receiving her husband’s soul]
198. (13) This transformation is accomplished by the wife by
her reception of the propagations of her husband’s soul with
delight – a delight arising from her willing to be an embodiment
of love for her husband’s wisdom. Since this accords with points
already explained before in nos. 172, 173,
further explanation is omitted here.In wives, conjugal delights take their rise from no other
source than their willing to be united with their husbands, as
good is united with truth in a marriage of these on the plane of
the spirit. We separately showed in its own chapter that married
love descends from this marriage.[*1] It can be seen in
consequence, as though in a mirror, that a wife joins her husband
to her as good joins truth to it; also that a husband joins
himself to his wife in return according to his reception of her
love in him, as truth joins itself to good in return, according to
its reception of good in it. Thus it can be seen that a wife’s
love takes form through the wisdom of her husband, as good takes
form through truth; for truth is what gives form to good.It is apparent from this as well, then, that conjugal delights
in a wife come principally from her willing to be united with her
husband, consequently from her willing to be an embodiment of love
for her husband’s wisdom. For she then feels the delights of her
warmth in the light of her husband, as explained under heading
(4), nos. 188, 189.[*1] See “The Origin of married love from the Marriage
between Good and Truth,” nos. 83ff.
- 198. [Receiving her husband’s soul]
- (14) A maiden is thus transformed into a
wife, and a youth into a husband.- 199. [Becoming a wife or husband]
199. (14) A maiden is thus transformed into a wife, and a youth
into a husband. This follows as a consequence from what we have
already said in this and the previous chapter respecting the union
of married partners into one flesh. A maiden turns or is turned
into a wife because a wife has elements in her taken from her
husband, thus elements acquired which did not exist in her before
as an unmarried woman. A youth turns or is turned into a husband
because a husband has elements in him taken from his wife, which
heighten the capacity in him for receiving love and wisdom,
elements which did not exist in him before as an unmarried man.
However, this is the case with people who are in a state of true
married love. Among them are some who feel as though they are a
united person and virtually one flesh (as may be seen in the
preceding chapter, no. 178).It is apparent from this that a maidenly state is transformed
into a wifely one in women, and a youthful state into a husbandly
one in men.[2] I was convinced of the fact of this from the following
experience in the spiritual world:Some men said that the relationship a man has with a woman
before marriage and the relationship he has with his wife after
marriage are similar. When they heard this, their wives became
very offended and said, “They are not at all alike! The
difference is as the difference between fantasy and reality.”To this the men retorted, “Are you not women as before?”
To which their wives responded with rising voice, “We are not
“women” but wives! The love you feel is a fantasy love
and not a real one; therefore you speak in fantasy terms.”The men then said, “If you are not “women,”
still you are married women.” But they replied, “In the
early days of marriage we were married women; now, however, we are
wives.”
- 199. [Becoming a wife or husband]
- (15) In a marriage of one man with one wife,
in which there is a true married love between them, the wife becomes
more and more a wife, and the husband more and more a husband.- 200. [More and more a wife or husband]
200. (15) In a marriage of one man with one wife, in which
there is a true married love between them, the wife becomes more
and more a wife, and the husband more and more a husband. It may
be seen above in nos. 177, 178,
that true married love joins two partners more and more into one
person. So, because a wife becomes a wife by union with her
husband and according to that union, likewise a husband a husband
by union with his wife and according to it, and because true
married love lasts to eternity, it follows that a wife becomes
more and more a wife, and a husband more and more a husband.The fundamental reason for this is that in a marriage of true
married love, each partner becomes more and more deeply human, for
that love opens the deeper aspects of their minds, and as these
are opened, a person becomes more and more human. To become more
human is, on the part of a wife, to become more a wife; and on the
part of a husband, to become more a husband.I have heard from angels that a wife becomes more and more a
wife as her husband becomes more and more a husband; however, not
so much the reverse. The reason, they said, is that a chaste wife
rarely if ever fails to love her husband, but what fails is her
being loved by her husband in return. They also said that this
failure is attributable to a lack of elevation in his wisdom,
which alone receives the love of a wife. (Respecting this wisdom,
see nos. 130, 163-165.) But
this they said in reference to marriages on earth.
- 200. [More and more a wife or husband]
- (16) Their forms are also thus progressively
perfected and ennobled from within.- 201. [Ennobled from within]
201. (16) Their forms are also thus progressively perfected and
ennobled from within. The human form is most perfect and most
noble when by marriage two forms become one form, thus when the
flesh of two becomes one flesh, in accordance with the story of
their creation. The husband’s mind is then elevated into a higher
light, and the wife’s mind into a higher warmth, and they then
burgeon, blossom and bear fruit, like trees in springtime (as may
be seen above in nos. 188, 189).We will see in the discussion that follows next that the
ennobling of this form results in the birth of noble fruits –
spiritual fruits in heaven, natural fruits on earth.
- 201. [Ennobled from within]
- (17) The offspring born of couples who are
in a state of true married love derive from their parents a conjugal
connection between good and truth, from which they have an
inclination and faculty, if a son, to perceive matters having do to
with wisdom, if a daughter, to love the things that wisdom teaches.-
- 202. [Inclinations are inherited]
202. (17) The offspring born of couples who are in a state of
true married love derive from their parents a conjugal connection
between good and truth, from which they have an inclination and
faculty, if a son, to perceive matters having do to with wisdom,
if a daughter, to love the things that wisdom teaches. Everyone
knows from historical accounts in general and their own
observations in particular that children inherit from their
parents tendencies to the same kinds of things as had been
connected with their parents’ love and mode of life. However, they
do not inherit or have transmitted to them the parents’ actual
affections or resulting modes of life, but only tendencies to
these and also capacities for them (a point convincingly shown by
some of the wise in the spiritual world, as reported in two
narrative accounts presented above[*1]).[2] Evidence that descendants are drawn by hereditary
inclinations into affections, thoughts, ways of speaking, and
modes of life similar to those of their parents – if they do not
break themselves of those inclinations – is clearly apparent from
the Jewish nation today and its close similarity to that nation’s
ancestors in Egypt, in the desert, in the land of Canaan, and at
the time of the Lord. It is apparent, moreover, not only from the
close similarity in their minds, but also in their faces. Who does
not recognize a Jew by his looks?It is the same with other lines of descent. One may
legitimately conclude from this that people are born with
inclinations to similar things as their parents and that these
inclinations are hereditary.However, to keep actual thoughts and deeds from ensuing, it is
Divinely provided that corrupt inclinations may be rectified, and
that a capacity for this is also implanted. Resulting from this
capacity are an ability and power in people to mend their habits,
under the direction of parents and teachers, and afterwards by
themselves when they come into their own right and judgment.
- 202. [Inclinations are inherited]
-
- 203. [The conjugal connection]
203. We say that offspring derive from their parents a conjugal
connection between good and truth, because from creation a union
of these two has been introduced into the soul of everyone; for
this is the ingredient which flows into a human being from the
Lord and causes his life to be human. However, this conjugal union
passes from the soul into subsequent elements until it reaches the
final constituents of the body, and as it passes, on one level or
another it is changed by the person himself in many ways, and
sometimes into the opposite, which we call the conjugal or
connubial connection between evil and falsity. When this occurs,
the mind is closed up from below, and sometimes is twisted around
like a spiral coil into the opposite direction.Nevertheless, in some people the union is not closed up but
remains partly open above, and in some cases all the way open. In
either circumstance, this conjugal union is something from which
offspring derive inclinations from their parents, a son in one way
and a daughter in another. The conjugal union has this effect,
because married love is the fundamental love of all loves (as we
showed above in no. 65).
- 203. [The conjugal connection]
-
- 204. [Positive inclinations in children]
204. As said, the offspring born of people who are in a state
of true married love inherit inclinations and faculties, if a son,
to perceive matters having do to with wisdom, if a daughter, to
love the things that wisdom teaches; and the reason is that from
creation a conjugal union between good and truth has been
implanted in the soul of everyone, and also from the soul in
subsequent elements. Indeed, as we have shown before,[*1] this
conjugal relationship fills the universe from the firsts to the
lasts of it, from human beings all the way down to worms.
Moreover, as we have also indicated previously,[*2] every person
from creation has implanted in him a capacity to open the lower
regions of his mind to the point of union with its higher ones,
which are in the light and warmth of heaven.It is clear from this that offspring who are born of a marriage
in which this has been the case, from birth inherit a greater
ability and readiness to join good to truth and truth to good,
thus to become wise, than others. Consequently they also inherit a
greater ability and readiness to absorb matters that have to do
with the church and heaven. That married love is tied together
with these is something we have already demonstrated many times.This makes plainly evident to the sight of reason the purpose
for which the Lord the Creator has provided and continues to
provide marriages of true married love.[*1] See no. 92.
[*2] See no. 188.
- 204. [Positive inclinations in children]
- 205. [family by family]
205. I have heard from angels that people who used to live in
very ancient times, today in heaven continue to live household by
household, family by family, and nation by nation, similarly to
the way they had lived on earth, and that scarcely anyone is
missing from any household. The reason, they said, is that true
married love existed among them; and their children consequently
inherited inclinations toward the conjugal connection between good
and truth, into which they were easily introduced more and more
deeply by their parents through their upbringing and education,
and into which they were afterwards led by the Lord as though on
their own when they came into their own right and judgment.
-
- (18) This occurs because the soul of the
offspring comes from its father, and its clothing from its mother.- 206. [Soul from father, clothing from mother]
206. (18) This occurs because the soul of the offspring comes
from its father, and its clothing from its mother. No one who is
wise calls into question the idea that the soul comes from the
father. Moreover, it is clearly visible in later generations which
descend from fathers of families in a true line of descent, from
their qualities of mind, and, in addition, from their facial
features (these being images of the qualities of mind). Indeed,
the father reappears, as though in effigy, if not in his children,
nevertheless in his grandchildren and great-grandchildren. The
reason is that the soul forms the inmost element in a person, and
though this may be covered over in the immediate offspring, still
it emerges and displays itself in generations after that.The fact that the soul comes from the father and the clothing
from the mother may be illustrated by analogous parallels in the
vegetable kingdom. Here the earth or ground is the common mother.
It admits seeds into it as though in a womb, and clothes them.
Indeed, in a way it conceives, carries, gives birth to and rears
the seedlings, as a mother does her offspring from a father.
- 206. [Soul from father, clothing from mother]
- Some sages of olden times in Greece on
occupations in heaven (no. 207).- 207. [Occupations in heaven]
207. To this I will append two narrative accounts. Here is the
first:Some time later[*1] I looked in the direction of the city
Athenaeum, which I said something about in an earlier account,[*2]
and I heard an unusual clamor. In the clamor I heard an element of
laughter, in the laughter an element of displeasure, and in the
displeasure an element of sorrow. However, the clamor was not
therefore inharmonious, but harmonious, because the elements did
not mix with each other, but one was contained within another. (In
the spiritual world, one distinctly perceives the variety and
combination of affections in a sound.)From a distance I asked, “What is the matter?”
They then said, “A messenger came from the place where
newcomers from the Christian world first appear, saying he had
heard from three of them there that in the world they had come
from, they had believed like everyone else that the blessed and
happy after death would have complete rest from their labors, and
that since positions of responsibility, occupations and
employments are labors, they would have rest from these.“An emissary of ours has now brought these three here, and
they are standing at the gate and waiting. A commotion broke out
because of this, and after deliberating, the people have decided
not to bring them into the Palladium on Parnassium hill, as they
have done with visitors before, but to bring them into the great
hall there, to disclose the news they have from the Christian
world. Several delegates have been sent to formally usher them
in.”[2] Since I was in the spirit – and since distances for spirits
depend on the states of their affections, and I was then affected
with a wish to see and hear these people – I found myself present
there and saw them brought in and heard them speak.The people in the hall who were older or wiser sat towards the
sides, with the rest in the middle, and in front of them was a
raised dais. In formal procession through the middle of the hall,
some of the younger people conducted the three newcomers and the
messenger to it. Then, after waiting for silence, one of the older
ones there greeted them and asked, “What news do you have
from earth?”They said, “We have much that is new, but tell us, please,
on what subject?”So the older man replied, “What news do you have from
earth regarding our world and heaven?”They then answered, “When we first came into this world,
we learned that here and in heaven there are positions of
responsibility, ministries, occupations, business dealings,
scholarly studies in every field of learning, and wonderful kinds
of employment. Yet we had believed that upon our departure or
passage from the natural world into this spiritual one, we would
come into everlasting rest from our labors. What are occupations
but labors?”[3] To this the older man replied, “Did you think that
eternal rest from labors meant eternal idleness, in which you
would continually sit around or lie about, breathing in auras of
delight with your breast and drinking in outpourings of joy with
your mouth?”Laughing gently at this, the three newcomers said that they had
supposed something of the sort.At that they then received this response: “What do joys
and delights and thus happiness have in common with idleness?
Idleness causes the mind to collapse rather than expand, or the
person to become deader rather than more alive.“Picture someone sitting around in a state of complete
idleness, with hands hanging down, his eyes downcast or shut, and
imagine that he is at the same time surrounded with an aura of
rapture. Would drowsiness not seize both his head and his body,
and the lively swelling of his face drop? With every fiber
loosened, would he not finally begin to sway back and forth and
eventually fall to the ground? What keeps the whole system of the
body expanded and taut but an intentness of mind? And what
produces an intentness of mind but responsibilities and
employments, when these are undertaken with delight?“So, then, I will tell you some news from heaven, that
they have there positions of responsibility, ministries, higher
and lower courts of law, and also trades and employments.”[4] When the three newcomers heard that in heaven they have
higher and lower courts of law, they began to say, “What is
the purpose of these? Are not all in heaven inspired and led by
God, and do they not all therefore know what is just and right?
What need is there then for judges?”But the older man replied, “In this world we are
instructed and taught what is good and true, also what is just and
right, the same as in the natural world. Moreover, we learn these
things not directly from God but indirectly through others. Every
angel, too, like every man, thinks truth and does good as though
of himself, and this is not pure but mixed in character, depending
on the angel’s state. In addition, among angels also, some are
simple and some wise, and the wise have to make judgments when the
simple ones among them, owing to their simpleness or ignorance,
are uncertain about what is just or deviate from it.“But,” he said to them, “since you are still
newcomers in this world, follow me into our city, if you wish, and
we will show you all.”[5] So they left the hall, with some of the older people
accompanying them as well. And they went first to a great library,
which had been divided into a number of smaller collections
according to subject fields.The three newcomers were dumbfounded at seeing so many books,
and they said, “You have books in this world too! Where do
you get the parchment and paper? Where you get the pens and ink?”The older men said in reply, “We perceive that you
believed in the previous world that because this world is
spiritual, it would be barren. Moreover, that you believed this
because you harbored an idea of spiritual existence that was
abstracted from a material one, and anything abstracted from
material existence seemed to you to be nothing, consequently as
something barren. Yet we have a full array of everything here. It
is just that everything here is essential in nature rather than
material, and material objects take their origin from essential
ones. Those of us who live here are spiritual beings because we
are essential beings rather than material ones. So it is that
everything found in the material world exists here in its perfect
form, even books and manuscripts, and many other things.”When the three newcomers heard the term essential used, they
thought it must be so, both because they saw the books that had
been written, and because they had heard it said that material
objects have their origin from essential forms.To convince them further with respect to this, the men took the
newcomers down to the quarters of copyists who were making copies
of drafts written by some of the wise people of the city; and when
the newcomers looked at the manuscripts, they marveled at how neat
and polished they were.[6] After this they escorted the newcomers to professional
academies, gymnasia and colleges, also to places where their
scholarly forums were held, some of which they called forums of
the Daughters of Heliconeum, some forums of the Daughters of
Parnassium, some forums of the Daughters of Athenaeum, and some
forums of the Muses of the Spring.[*3] They said they gave them
these names because daughters or maidens symbolize affections for
various kinds of knowledge, and everyone’s intelligence depends on
his affection for various kinds of knowledge. The forums so called
were spiritual exercises and debates.Next they took the newcomers around the city to its directors
and managers and their officials, and these in turn introduced
them to marvelous works, which their craftsmen create in a
spiritual manner.[7] After the newcomers had seen these things, the older man
spoke with them again concerning eternal rest from labors, into
which the blessed and happy come after death.“Eternal rest does not mean idleness,” he said,
“because idleness affects the mind and consequently the whole
body with listlessness, lethargy, insensibility and slumber, and
these are conditions of deadness, not life, much less the eternal
life experienced by angels of heaven. Eternal rest, therefore, is
rest that dispels these states and vitalizes a person, and this
must be something which rouses the mind. Thus it is some pursuit
or employment by which the mind is awakened, animated, and
afforded delight, which in turn depends on some useful service for
the sake of which, in which, and towards which it is working. So
it is that the whole of heaven is viewed by the Lord as a world of
useful service, and each angel is an angel according to the
service he renders. The pleasure in being useful carries him
along, like a boat in a favoring current, bringing him into a
state of eternal peace and the rest that comes with peace. This is
what is meant by eternal rest from labors.“An angel’s vitality depends on an application of his mind
to some pursuit for the sake of being useful, and confirmation of
this is clearly seen from the fact that they each possess married
love with its vigor, potency and delights in the measure that they
are engaged in a pursuit of genuine use.”[8] When the three newcomers had been convinced that eternal
rest does not mean idleness but the pleasure in some employment
that is of use, some young women came with articles of needlework
and sewing, works of their own hands, which they presented to
them. Then, as these newly introduced spirits were departing, the
young women sang a song whose angelic melody expressed an
affection for employments of use and its accompanying
satisfactions.[*1] I.e., some time after the occurrence related in no. 182.
[*2] See no. 182; also nos. 151[r]-154[r].
[*3] In reference to these names, cf., in previous accounts of
this city, the topographical features mentioned in nos. 151[r]:1,
182:1,2.
- 207. [Occupations in heaven]
- The golden rain and hall, where some wives
spoke again on the subject of married love (no. 208).- 208. [Wives’ secrets]
208. The second account:
When I was once thinking about the secrets of married love that
wives hide and keep to themselves, I again saw the golden rain
that I mentioned before;[*1] and I remembered that it fell like
mist upon a hall in the east, where three pictures of married love
lived, that is, three married couples who loved each other
tenderly. On seeing it, I hastened in that direction, as though
bidden by the sweetness of my reflection on that love; and as I
approached, the rain turned from gold to purple, then scarlet, and
when I was almost there, it became opalescent like dew.I knocked and the door was opened. So I said to the attendant,
“Convey to the husbands that one who was here before with an
angel is present again, seeking permission to come in and speak
with them.”When the attendant returned, he indicated the husbands’ assent
and I entered. The three husbands and their wives were together in
a courtyard, and they returned my greeting warmly.I then asked the wives whether the white dove had ever appeared
at the window again. They said it had appeared that very day, and
also had spread its wings. “We therefore anticipated your
coming,” they said, “to entreat us to reveal one more
secret of married love.”“But why do you say one,” I asked, “when I have
come here to learn many more?”[2] “They are secrets,” they replied, “and some
of them so transcend the wisdom of you men that the comprehension
of your intellect cannot grasp them. You men vaunt yourselves over
us on account of your wisdom, but we do not vaunt ourselves over
you on account of ours – even though our wisdom is superior to
yours because it enters into your inclinations and affections and
sees, perceives and feels them.“You know nothing at all about the inclinations and
affections of your love, and this despite the fact that it is
because of them and in accordance with them that your intellect
thinks, consequently that it is because of them and in accordance
with them that you have your wisdom. Yet wives know these things
in their husbands so well that they see them in their husbands’s
faces and hear them in the intonations of the speech of their
mouth – indeed so well that they feel them with the touch of their
hands on their husbands’ breasts, arms and cheeks. But from a
zealous love for your happiness and at the same time our own, we
pretend as if we do not know these things, while at the same time
moderating them so discreetly that whatever our husbands’ wish,
pleasure or will, we accede to it by allowing and enduring it, and
only redirecting it when possible, but never compelling.”[3] “How is it that you have this wisdom?” I asked.
They replied, “It is implanted in us from creation and so
from birth. Our husbands liken it to an instinct, but we say it
comes of Divine providence, in order that men may be made happy
through their wives. Our husbands have told us that it is the
Lord’s will that the masculine sex act in freedom in accord with
reason; and since a man’s freedom involves his inclinations and
affections, therefore the Lord Himself moderates his freedom from
within, and through his wife from without, and so forms the man
and his wife together into an angel of heaven. Besides, if love is
compelled, its fundamental nature changes and it becomes no longer
the same love.“But we will explain it more frankly. We are moved to this
– that is, to a discreet moderation of the inclinations and
affections of our husbands, so discreet that it seems to them that
they act in freedom in accord with their own reason – because we
feel delight from their love, and we love nothing more than for
them to feel delight from our feelings of delight. But if these
feelings become matters of indifference in them, they also begin
to fade in us.”[4] When they had said this, one of the wives went into her
bedroom, and returning said, “My dove is still fluttering its
wings – a sign that we may divulge more.”So they said, “We have observed changes in the
inclinations and affections of men in a variety of cases. For
instance, husbands are cold to their wives whenever they entertain
vain thoughts against the Lord and the church. They are cold
whenever they pride themselves because of their own intelligence.
They are cold whenever they look upon other women with lust. They
are cold whenever they are admonished by their wives on the
subject of love. We could mention a number of other instances as
well, including the fact that the coldness they feel varies in
each case. We notice this from the withdrawal of feeling from
their eyes, ears and body when their senses meet ours.“From these few illustrations you can see that we know
better than men whether all is well with them or not. If they are
cold to their wives, all is not well with them, but if they are
warm to their wives it is. Wives are therefore continually turning
over in their minds ways of inducing their men to be warm to them
and not cold, and they do this with a keenness of perception
incomprehensible to men.”[5] As they said this, we heard what seemed to be the sound of
a dove moaning; and at that point the wives said, “That is a
signal to us that although we are eager to divulge still deeper
secrets, we may not. Perhaps you will expose to men the secrets
you have heard.”“That is my intention,” I replied. “What harm
will it do?”After conferring with each other about this, the wives then
said, “Disclose them if you wish. We are not unacquainted
with the power of persuasion possessed by wives. Indeed, they will
say to their husbands, “The man is fooling. They are
fictions. He is trying to amuse with appearances and the usual
nonsense typical of men. Do not believe him; believe us. We know
that you are the lovers and we your humble servants.”“So,” they said, “disclose them if you wish; but
the husbands’ attention will not hang on your lips, but on the
lips of their wives which they kiss.”[*1] See no. 155[r].
- 208. [Wives’ secrets]
-
- 209. UNIVERSAL MATTERS RELATING TO MARRIAGES
-
- 209. [UNIVERSAL MATTERS]
There are very many points in regard to marriage which, if
presented in detail, would swell this book into an immense volume.
For we could present a detailed treatment of various particulars
relating to similarities and dissimilarities between partners; to
the elevation of natural married love into spiritual married love,
and the conjunction of the two; to the gradual growth of the one
and the gradual decline of the other; to the varieties and
diversities in each; to the intelligence in wives; to the universal
conjugal atmosphere emanating from heaven, and the one opposite to
it from hell; to the way these flow in and are received; and many
other topics besides, which, if they were set out point by point,
would expand this work into so large a tome it would weary the
reader.For this reason, and to avoid useless prolixities, we
consolidate these items into this chapter on “Universal
Matters Relating to Marriages.” As in previous chapters,
however, we will divide them into discussions under their own
headings, as follows:(1) The special sense of married love is the sense of touch.
(2) In the case of people who are in a state of true married
love, their capacity for growing wise increases, but with those who
are not in a state of married love, it decreases.(3) In the case of people who are in a state of true married
love, their happiness in living together increases, but with those
who are not in a state of married love, it decreases.(4) In the case of people who are in a state of true married
love, their union of minds increases, and with it, their
friendship, but with those who are not in a state of married love,
these both decrease.(5) People who are in a state of true married love continually
wish to be one person, but those who are not in a state of married
love want to be two separate individuals.(6) People who are in a state of true married love look to
eternity in their marriage, while the opposite is the case with
those who are not in a state of married love.(7) Married love has its seat in chaste wives, but still their
love depends on their husbands.(8) Wives love the bonds of marriage, provided that their
husbands love them too.(9) The intelligence of women is by nature modest, gracious,
peaceable, compliant, soft and gentle, whereas the intelligence of
men is by nature critical, rough, resistant, argumentative, and
given to intemperance.(10) Wives do not experience a state of arousal as their
husbands do, but theirs is a state of readiness to receive.(11) The sexual abundance men have is according to their love of
propagating the truths of their wisdom and according to their love
of performing useful services.(12) Determinations to intercourse are at the good pleasure of
the husband.(13) There is a conjugal atmosphere which flows in from the Lord
through heaven into each and every thing of the universe, extending
even to its lowest forms.(14) This atmosphere is received by the female sex and
communicated through it to the male sex, and not the other way
around.(15) Where a true married love exists, this atmosphere is
received by the wife, and by the husband solely through his wife.(16) Where the love is not married love, this atmosphere is
indeed received by the wife, but not by the husband through her.(17) True married love can be present in one of the partners and
not at the same time in the other.(18) Married partners bring with them [various similarities
and][*1] various dissimilarities, both internal and external.(19) Various similar qualities can be joined together, but not
with dissimilar ones.(20) For people who desire true married love, the Lord provides
a similar partner, and if one is not found on earth, He provides
one in heaven.(21) To the degree that a person’s married love wanes and is
lost, his character approaches that of an animal.Explanation of these statements now follows.
[*1] See no. 227 below.
- 209. [UNIVERSAL MATTERS]
- (1) The special sense of married love is the
sense of touch.- 210. [The sense of touch]
210. (1) The special sense of married love is the sense of
touch. Every love has its own special sense. The love of seeing,
arising from a love of understanding, has the sense of sight; and
the things that give it pleasure are symmetries and qualities of
beauty. The love of hearing, arising from a love of listening and
complying, has the sense of hearing; and the things that give it
pleasure are harmonies. The love of identifying odors floating
about in the air, arising from a love of perceiving, has the sense
of smell; and the things that give it pleasure are fragrances. The
love of nourishing oneself, arising from a love of filling oneself
with good qualities and truths, has the sense of taste; and the
things that give it pleasure are fine foods. The love of
identifying objects, arising from a love of looking out and
protecting oneself, has the sense of touch; and the things that
give it pleasure are sensations that tickle and tingle.The love of joining oneself with one’s partner, arising from a
love of uniting goodness and truth, also has the sense of touch,
and that is because this sense is the common one of all the senses
and so draws contributions from the rest. People know that this
love brings all the aforementioned senses into confederation with
it and appropriates their pleasures to itself.The fact that the sense of touch is dedicated to married love
and is special to it is apparent from its every sport, and from
the exaltation of its subtle sensations to the most highly
exquisite. But to extend this discussion further is left to
lovers.
- 210. [The sense of touch]
- (2) In the case of people who are in a state
of true married love, their capacity for growing wise increases, but
with those who are not in a state of married love, it decreases.-
- 211. [Wisdom increases]
211. (2) In the case of people who are in a state of true
married love, their capacity for growing wise increases, but with
those who are not in a state of married love, it decreases. A
capacity for growing wise increases with those who are in a state
of true married love, because it is as a result of wisdom and in
accordance with it that this love exists in married couples, as we
have shown and fully demonstrated in preceding chapters. It also
increases because the special sense of this love is the sense of
touch, and since this sense has something in common with all the
senses, and is moreover full of delights, it therefore opens the
inner perceptions of their minds as it opens the inner perceptions
of their senses and together with these the organic substances of
the whole body.It follows from this that people who are possessed of this love
love nothing better than to become wise. For a person becomes wise
as the inner perceptions of his mind are opened, because by their
opening the thoughts of his understanding are raised into a higher
light and the affections of his will into a higher warmth – the
higher light being wisdom, and the higher warmth a love for
wisdom. Spiritual delights joined to natural delights – as is the
case in people in a state of true married love – bring about an
amenability to and therefore a capacity for becoming wise.Because of this, angels possess married love in accordance with
their wisdom, and increases in that love and its accompanying
delights come about as a result of increases in their wisdom.
Because of this, too, the spiritual offspring which are born of
their marriages are, from the father, such things as have to with
wisdom, and, from the mother, such things as have to do with love;
and they love these offspring with a spiritual storg [*1] (the
natural affection of parents for their offspring). This latter
love attaches itself to their married love and continually
elevates it, and at the same time unites the partners.[*1] From the Greek storg, pronounced stor”gee (like
psyche), in use in the 17th, 18th and 19th centuries to mean
natural or instinctive affection, usually that of parents for
their offspring, but no longer current.
- 211. [Wisdom increases]
- 212. [Insanity increases]
212. The opposite happens in the case of people who are not in
any state of married love owing to a lack of any love of wisdom in
them. People like this do not enter into marriages except with the
purpose of indulging their lascivious lusts, and this purpose has
in it a love of thinking insanely. For every purpose regarded in
its essence is love, and lasciviousness in its spiritual origin is
a form of insanity. By insanity we mean a derangement of the mind
resulting from falsities, and the derangement is pronounced when
it is a derangement of mind resulting from falsifications of
truths, even to the point that the falsifications are believed to
be matters of wisdom.Clear confirmation and proof that people like this are opposed
to married love appears in the spiritual world. There, at the
first scent of married love, they flee into caverns and shut the
doors; and if these are opened, they go insane like madmen in the
world.
-
- (3) In the case of people who are in a state
of true married love, their happiness in living together increases,
but with those who are not in a state of married love, it decreases.- 213. [Happiness increases]
213. (3) In the case of people who are in a state of true
married love, their happiness in living together increases, but
with those who are not in a state of married love, it decreases.
Their happiness in living together increases in the case of those
who are in a state of true married love, because they love each
other with their every power of sensation. The wife sees nothing
more lovable than her husband, and the husband nothing more
lovable than her. Indeed, neither do they hear, smell or touch
anything more lovable than each other. From this comes their
happiness in living together and sharing house, bedroom, and bed.You who are married men can confirm for yourselves that this is
so from the first delights of marriage, which are then felt in
their fullness; because at that time, of all the opposite sex, a
husband loves his wife alone.Everyone knows that the reverse is the case with those who do
not possess any married love.
- 213. [Happiness increases]
- (4) In the case of people who are in a state
of true married love, their union of minds increases, and with it,
their friendship, but with those who are not in a state of married
love, these both decrease.- 214. [Unity increases]
214. (4) In the case of people who are in a state of true
married love, their union of minds increases, and with it, their
friendship, but with those who are not in a state of married love,
these both decrease. We have already shown that a union of minds
increases in the case of those who are in a state of true married
love, in the chapter in which we took up “The Conjunction of
Souls and Minds by Marriage, Meant by the Lord’s Saying that They
are No Longer Two But One Flesh” (see nos. 156[r]-181).
[2] This union grows, moreover, as friendship is joined to love,
because friendship is, so to speak, the face of that love and also
its garment; for friendship both attaches itself to love like a
garment and combines itself with it like a face.Love prior to friendship is similar to love for any of the
opposite sex, and after the wedding it gradually fades. But love
combined with friendship continues on after the wedding and is
also strengthened. It enters as well more deeply into the breast.
Friendship introduces the love and causes it to be truly married;
and then the love in turn causes this, its friendship, to become
also married – a friendship which differs greatly from that of any
other love, because it is a full one.[3] People know that the opposite happens in the case of those
who do not have married love. In their case the first friendship
that was inspired in them at the time of their betrothal and later
during the first days after their wedding, more and more ebbs from
the inner recesses of their minds and gradually subsides from
there until it finally departs to the surface coverings of the
skin. And in the case of those who contemplate separation, it
entirely disappears. With those who do not contemplate separation,
however, love remains in outward appearances, but inwardly it is
cold.
- 214. [Unity increases]
- (5) People who are in a state of true
married love continually wish to be one person, but those who are
not in a state of married love want to be two separate individuals.- 215. [They wish to be one]
215. (5) People who are in a state of true married love
continually wish to be one person, but those who are not in a
state of married love want to be two separate individuals. Married
love in its essence is nothing else but the wish of two to be one,
or, in other words, a will on their part that their two lives
become one life. To carry out that will is the constant endeavor
of this love, and all that it does flows from it. It has been
established from the investigations of philosophers, and it is
also evident to people of educated reason who reflect, that effort
is the very essence of motion, and that will in the human being is
a living effort. It follows from this that people who are in a
state of true married love continually have within them an effort,
or will, to be one person.That the opposite is the case with those who are not in a state
of married love, they themselves very well know. For they
constantly think of themselves as two separate individuals, owing
to a lack of union between their souls and minds, and they
therefore do not see what is meant by the Lord’s words, that “they
are no longer two but one flesh” (Matthew 19:6).
- 215. [They wish to be one]
- (6) People who are in a state of true
married love look to eternity in their marriage, while the opposite
is the case with those who are not in a state of married love.- 216. [They look to eternity]
216. (6) People who are in a state of true married love look to
eternity in their marriage, while the opposite is the case with
those who are not in a state of married love. People who are in a
state of true married love look to eternity in their marriage
because eternity is inherent in this love. Its eternity is owing
to the fact that this love in the wife and wisdom in the husband
grow to eternity, and as these grow or progress, the partners
enter more and more deeply into the blessings of heaven –
blessings which their wisdom and love of wisdom at the same time
carry concealed within them. If one were to snatch away an idea of
eternity, therefore, or if by some chance it should slip from
their minds, it would be as though they were cast down from
heaven.[2] What the state of married partners in heaven is like when
thought of eternity leaves their minds and an idea of marriage as
something temporary occurs instead, for me came to light from the
following experience:A married couple from heaven was once granted permission to be
with me, and some clever-talking scoundrel then managed to take
away their thought of eternity in regard to marriage. On being
deprived of this thought they began to lament, saying that they
could not go on living and that they felt a sense of distress as
never before. When their fellow angels in heaven perceived this,
the scoundrel was sent away and cast down. As soon as this
happened, immediately their thought of eternity returned to them,
and rejoicing with a heartfelt joy on account of it, they tenderly
embraced each other.[3] On another occasion I listened to two partners who one
moment entertained a thought of eternity in respect to their
marriage, and the next moment a thought of it as something
temporary. The reason was that an internal dissimilarity existed
between them. As long as they had the thought of eternity, they
were happy together; but when they began to think of their
marriage as something temporary, they said it was no longer a
marriage – the wife declaring that she was no longer a wife but a
mistress, and the husband that he was no longer a husband but a
lecher. When their internal dissimilarity was revealed to them,
therefore, the man left the woman and the woman left the man.
Afterwards, however, because they each had an idea of eternity in
respect to marriage, they were matched with partners of a
character similar to their own.[4] From these observations it can be clearly seen that
partners who are in a state of true married love look to eternity,
and that if this idea slips from the inmost recesses of their
thought, they are estranged from each other in respect to married
love, however much they may not be estranged at the same time in
respect to friendship. For friendship has its abode in outward
ties, while married love has its abode in inward ones.It is the same in the case of marriages on earth. When married
partners there love each other tenderly, they think of eternity in
regard to the marriage covenant, and not at all of its being
terminated by death. Or if they do think about this, they grieve,
until strengthened again with hope by the thought of its
continuing in the life to come.
- 216. [They look to eternity]
- (7) Married love has its seat in chaste
wives, but still their love depends on their husbands.- 216r. [Love is in wives
but depends on husbands]216r. [repeated] (7) Married love has its seat in chaste wives,
but their love depends on their husbands. The reason is that wives
are born forms of love, and it is therefore innate in them to wish
to be one with their husbands. They also continue to feed their
love with this thought of their will. Consequently to turn away
from their effort to unite themselves with their husbands would be
to turn away from their very natures.It is different with husbands. Because they are not born forms
of love, but are receivers of that love from their wives,
therefore to the degree that they receive it, to that degree their
wives enter into them with their love. But to the degree they do
not receive it, their wives stand outside with their love and
wait.This is what happens, however, in the case of chaste wives. It
is otherwise in the case of unchaste ones.It follows from this that married love has its seat in chaste
wives, but that their love depends on their husbands.
- 216r. [Love is in wives
- (8) Wives love the bonds of marriage,
provided that their husbands love them too.- 217. [Wives love marriage if husbands do]
217. (8) Wives love the bonds of marriage, provided that their
husbands love them too. This follows from what was said under the
preceding heading. We add here the further observation that, from
their inborn nature, wives wish to be wives and to be called
wives. To them it is a title of respectability and honor.
Consequently they love the bonds of marriage. Moreover, since
chaste wives wish to be wives not just in name but in fact, and
because this is achieved by a closer and closer tie with their
husbands, they therefore love the bonds of marriage from the time
its covenant is established, and this the more as they are loved
in return by their husbands, or in other words, the more their
husbands love these bonds.
- 217. [Wives love marriage if husbands do]
- (9) The intelligence of women is by nature
modest, gracious, peaceable, compliant, soft and gentle, whereas the
intelligence of men is by nature critical, rough, resistant,
argumentative, and given to intemperance.- 218. [Intelligence of women and men]
218. (9) The intelligence of women is by nature modest,
gracious, peaceable, compliant, soft and gentle, while the
intelligence of men is by nature critical, rough, resistant,
argumentative, and given to intemperance. Evidence that this is
the nature of women and the nature of men is clearly apparent from
the body, face, tone of voice, speech, bearing and behavior of
each sex.With respect to the body, men are firm in skin and flesh, while
women are soft. With respect to the face, men’s are harder, more
defiant, rougher, darker in color, also whiskered, thus less
beautiful, whereas women’s are softer, more compliant, gentler,
lighter in color, and so pictures of beauty. With respect to tone
of voice, men have a stern one, while women have a gentle one.
With respect to their speech, men’s is given to intemperance and
argumentativeness, while women’s is modest and peaceable. With
respect to their bearing, men’s is bolder and more forceful,
whereas women’s is meeker and more delicate. With respect to their
behavior, men’s is more unruly, while women’s is more civilized.[2] The nature of men and the nature of women are different
even from the time they are born, and it became clearly apparent
to me how much they differ from seeing boys and girls together in
groups. Several times in a great city I looked through my window
and saw gatherings of them on the street, where over twenty of
them would congregate every day. There the boys would play
together in accordance with the temperament inborn in them –
raising a commotion, shouting, fighting, striking blows, throwing
stones at each other. In contrast, the girls would sit peacefully
at the doors of the houses, some playing with little children,
some dressing dolls, some sewing on bits of linen, some giving
each other kisses. And yet I was surprised to see that they
regarded the boys the way they were with friendly eyes.From this I could clearly see that a man is born a form of the
intellect, and a woman a form of love. I could also see what the
nature of the intellect is and what the nature of love is in their
beginnings, and thus what a man’s intellect in its development
would be like without conjunction with feminine love and
eventually married love.
- 218. [Intelligence of women and men]
- (10) Wives do not experience a state of
arousal as their husbands do, but theirs is a state of readiness to
receive.- 219. [Women do not get aroused]
219. (10) Wives do not experience a state of arousal as their
husbands do, but theirs is a state of readiness to receive. It is
apparent that men have the power of insemination and because of it
experience a state of arousal, and that women do not experience
this arousal because they do not have that power. Nevertheless, I
can relate from what I have been told that women experience a
state of readiness to receive and thus to conceive. I am not
permitted, however, to describe what this state in women is like,
and it is also something known only to them. Nor have they
divulged whether their love feels its delight when they are in
that state or whether they find it something distasteful, as some
of them say. This only is commonly known, that a husband may not
say to his wife that he has the ability but does not want to; for
this injures considerably her state of reception, which becomes
ready in the measure that her husband is able.
- 219. [Women do not get aroused]
- (11) The sexual abundance men have is
according to their love of propagating the truths of their wisdom
and according to their love of performing useful services.- 220. [Potency according to love of wisdom and
use]220. (11) The sexual abundance men have is according to their
love of propagating the truths of their wisdom and according to
their love of performing useful services. That this is the case is
one of the secrets known to people of ancient times and which
today have been lost. In ancient times people knew that each and
every activity that takes place in the body does so from a
spiritual origin. They knew, for example, that actions flow from
the will, which in itself is spiritual; that speech flows from
thought, which likewise is spiritual; also that natural sight
results from spiritual sight, which is one of the intellect; that
natural hearing results from spiritual hearing, which is an
attention of the intellect and at the same time a conformity of
the will; and that the natural sense of smell results from a
spiritual one, which is perception; and so on.In similar manner the ancients saw that a man’s power of
insemination stems from a spiritual origin; and from many
evidences of both reason and experience they concluded that it
results from the truths of which the intellect consists. Moreover,
they said that from the spiritual marriage that exists between
goodness and truth, which flows into each and every thing in the
universe, nothing else is received by members of the male sex but
truth and what relates to truth; and that this, in its descent
into the body, is formed into seed or sperm (which is why seeds,
spiritually interpreted, mean truths).[2] Regarding the process, they said that the male soul, being
intellectual in nature, is therefore truth; for anything
intellectual in nature is nothing else. Consequently as the soul
descends, truth also descends. This is so, they said, because the
soul is the inmost element in man and in every animal, and in its
essence is spiritual; and from an inherent effort towards its
propagation, in its descent it seeks and endeavors to reproduce
itself. Then, when this happens, the whole soul forms itself and
clothes itself and becomes seed or sperm. Moreover, this can take
place thousands and thousands of times, they said, because the
soul is a spiritual essence, which does not have dimension but
repleteness, and from which there is no taking away a part, but
instead a reproducing of the whole without any loss to it. As a
result, the soul is as fully present in its tiniest vessels, which
are the seeds or sperm, as it is in its largest one, which is the
body.[3] So then, since truth in the soul is the origin of the seed
or sperm, it follows that the sexual abundance men have is
according to their love of propagating the truths of their wisdom.
It is also according to their love of performing useful services,
because useful services are the good effects which truths produce.
Some people know in the world as well that the diligent have an
abundance, and not the lazy.I once asked how something female can be generated from the
soul of a man. The answer I received was that it originates from
good in the intellect, because this in its essence is truth; for
the intellect can think that something is good, thus thinking as
true that this something is good. It is different with the will.
This does not think about goodness and truth but loves them and
does them. Therefore, in the Word, sons symbolize truths, and
daughters, qualities of goodness (as may be seen above in no.
120); and when seed is mentioned in the Word,
it symbolizes truth (as may be seen in The Apocalypse Revealed,
no. 565).
- 220. [Potency according to love of wisdom and
- (12) Determinations to intercourse are at
the good pleasure of the husband.- 221. [Husbands determine when]
221. (12) Determinations to intercourse are at the good
pleasure of the husband. The reason is that the sexual abundance
referred to above is something that lies with men, and this varies
in them in accordance with both their state of mind and the
condition of their body. For the intellect is not as constant in
its thoughts as the will is in its affections. Indeed, it is
carried upward one moment and downward the next, being sometimes
in a state of serenity and clarity, sometimes in a state of
turmoil and confusion, at times engaged in pleasant subjects, at
other times caught up in unpleasant ones. And because the mind in
its workings is at the same time in the body, it follows that the
body undergoes similar states. As a result, the husband sometimes
draws away from married love, sometimes toward it, and in the one
state the abundance he has is withdrawn and in the other state
restored.For these reasons, determinations to intercourse must be left
to the good pleasure of the husband. That is why wives, from the
wisdom innate in them, never admonish their husbands in regard to
these matters.
- 221. [Husbands determine when]
- (13) There is a conjugal atmosphere which
flows in from the Lord through heaven into each and every thing of
the universe, extending even to its lowest forms.- 222. [The conjugal atmosphere]
222. (13) There is a conjugal atmosphere which flows in from
the Lord through heaven into each and every thing of the universe,
extending even to its lowest forms. We showed above in its own
chapter[*1] that love and wisdom, or to say the same thing, good
and truth, emanate from the Lord. A marriage of these two elements
continually emanates from the Lord, because they are Him, and from
Him come all things. Moreover, whatever emanates from Him fills
the universe; for without this, nothing that came into existence
would continue to exist.[2] There are several atmospheres which emanate from the Lord.
For example, an atmosphere of conservation for conserving the
created universe; an atmosphere of protection for protecting good
and truth against evil and falsity; an atmosphere of reformation
and regeneration; an atmosphere of innocence and peace; an
atmosphere of mercy and grace; besides others. But the universal
one of all is a conjugal atmosphere, because it is at the same
time an atmosphere of propagation and is thus the supreme
atmosphere in conserving the created universe by successive
generations.[3] This conjugal atmosphere fills the universe and pervades it
from the firsts to the lasts of it. That this is so is apparent
from observations made above,[*2] where we showed that there are
marriages in heaven, and most perfect marriages in the third or
highest heaven; also, that besides being in human beings, this
atmosphere exists in all members of the animal kingdom on earth,
extending even to worms, and furthermore in all members of the
vegetable kingdom, from olive trees and palms to the smallest
grasses.[4] This atmosphere is more universal than that of the heat and
light which emanate from the sun of our world; and reason can be
convinced of this from the fact that the conjugal atmosphere
operates even when the sun’s warmth is absent, such as in winter,
and when the sun’s light is absent, such as at night. Especially
is this so in the case of human beings. It continues to operate
because it originates from the sun of the angelic heaven, and that
sun produces a constant balance of heat and light, that is, a
constant union of good and truth. For heaven is in a state of
perpetual spring. Variations in goodness and truth in heaven or in
its warmth and light do not result from changes of the sun, as
changes on earth do from variations in the heat and light coming
from the sun there; but they occur as a result of the way
recipient vessels receive them.[*1] I.e., “The Origin of married love from the Marriage
between Good and Truth,” nos. 83ff. See
also no. 60.[*2] See, for example, the chapter, “Marriages in Heaven,”
nos. 27ff, including no. 42;
also nos. 92, 183, 204.
- 222. [The conjugal atmosphere]
- (14) This atmosphere is received by the
female sex and communicated through it to the male sex, and not the
other way around.- 223. [Received through women]
223. (14) This atmosphere is received by the female sex and
communicated through it to the male sex. The male sex does not
have any married love inherent in it, but married love is inherent
only in the female sex and is transmitted to the male sex from it.
This is something I have seen attested from an experience I had,
related above in no. 161. It is supported also
by the following argument, that the masculine form is an
intellect-oriented one and the feminine form a will-oriented one;
and an intellect-oriented form does not have the capacity to
develop a marital warmth on its own, but can do so only from the
associated warmth of another in whom this has been implanted from
creation. Consequently the masculine form cannot receive married
love except by having adjoined to it the will-oriented form of a
woman, because this is at the same time a form of love.[2] The same point could be further confirmed from the marriage
between good and truth, and, to the natural man, from the marriage
between the heart and the lungs, because the heart corresponds to
love and the lungs to the intellect. However, because most people
are without knowledge of these, any confirmation on the basis of
them would do more to obscure than enlighten.The communication of this atmosphere from the female sex to the
male sex is what causes the masculine mind to be set on fire even
at just the thought of the opposite sex. It follows that it is
also what causes the formation of the procreative powers in him
and thus his state of arousal. For unless warmth is added to light
on earth, nothing flourishes or is aroused to produce any fruit
there.
- 223. [Received through women]
- (15) Where a true married love exists, this
atmosphere is received by the wife, and by the husband solely
through his wife.- 224. [In true marriage, through the wife]
224. (15) Where a true married love exists, this atmosphere is
received by the wife, and by the husband solely through his wife.
It is a secret unknown today that in the case of people who are in
a state of true married love, this atmosphere is received by the
husband solely through his wife. And yet it is not really a
secret, because it is possible for a man about to be married or
just recently married to be aware of it. Is he not then affected
with a marital warmth by whatever emanates from his fiancé
or new bride, and not at that time by anything emanating from
others of her sex?It is the same with people who live together in a state of true
married love. Moreover, because everyone has an atmosphere of life
surrounding him, both man and woman, heavily around the breast and
lightly around the back, it is apparent why husbands who really
love their wives turn towards them and daily look upon them with
kindly countenance, and conversely, why those who do not love
their wives turn away from them and daily regard them with averted
gaze.A husband’s receiving the conjugal atmosphere solely through
his wife is the mark by which true married love is recognized and
differentiated from married love that is illusory, feigned, or
cold.
- 224. [In true marriage, through the wife]
- (16) Where the love is not married love,
this atmosphere is indeed received by the wife, but not by the
husband through her.- 225. [Where there is not true love the
husband looks elsewhere]225. (16) Where the love is not married love, this atmosphere
is indeed received by the wife, but not by the husband through
her. This conjugal atmosphere that flows into the universe is, in
its origin, Divine. As it descends, it becomes, with angels in
heaven, celestial and spiritual; with people, natural; with beasts
and birds, animal; with worms, merely carnal; and in the case of
plant forms, mechanical. In addition, in individual recipients it
is also modified according to their particular forms.Now because this atmosphere is received directly by the female
sex and indirectly by the male sex, and because it is received in
accordance with particular forms, it follows that, although in its
origin this atmosphere is holy, in its recipients it can be turned
into an atmosphere that is not holy, even indeed into one that is
opposite in character. The atmosphere opposite to it in such
recipients is called wanton in the case of women and licentious in
the case of men; and since men and women like that are in hell,
that is the atmosphere that emanates from there. At the same time,
that atmosphere also exhibits considerable diversity, and there
are consequently many varieties of it. However, a man attracts and
admits the type that accords with him and which is compatible with
and matches the kind of person he is.It can be seen in consequence that a man who does not love his
wife receives this atmosphere from some other source than his
wife. Still, it is possible for it to be inspired by the wife as
well, but without his knowledge, and at times when he feels warmer
towards her.
- 225. [Where there is not true love the
- (17) True married love can be present in one
of the partners and not at the same time in the other.- 226. []
226. (17) Married love can be present in one of the partners
and not at the same time in the other. Married love can exist in
one and not in the other, for one may fervently vow for himself a
chaste marriage, while the other does not know what chastity is.
One may love matters that have to do with the church, while the
other loves only matters that have to do with the world. One may
be with his mind in a state of heaven, while the other is with his
mind in a state of hell.As a result, married love may exist on the part of one and not
on the part of the other. Because their minds are turned in
opposite directions, they inwardly collide; and if this is not the
case outwardly, still the one who is not in a state of married
love regards his companion by covenant as an insufferable old
nuisance, and other like things.
- 226. []
- (18) Married partners bring with them
[various similarities and][*1] various dissimilarities, both
internal and external.- 227. [Similarities and dissimilarities]
227. (18) Married partners bring with them various similarities
and various dissimilarities, both internal and external. People
know that there are similarities between married partners and
dissimilarities; also that the outward ones are discernible,
whereas the inner ones do not appear except to the partners
themselves after they have lived together for some time, and to
others through certain indications. It is not worth the effort to
enumerate these for a conception of them, however, as one can fill
many pages recounting and describing their various types. Some
instances of similarity may be inferred and deduced in part from
the dissimilarities considered in the next chapter,[*1] on whose
account married love passes away into coldness.Similarities and dissimilarities arise in general from people’s
native inclinations, varied by their upbringing, associations, and
acquired persuasions.[*1] See “Reasons in Marriage for Cold States, Separations
and Divorces,” nos. 234ff.
- 227. [Similarities and dissimilarities]
- (19) Various similar qualities can be joined
together, but not with dissimilar ones.- 228. [Similarities can be joined]
228. (19) Various similar qualities can be joined together, but
not with dissimilar ones. Instances of similarities are many and
various, and some of them are further apart, some less so. Yet
even those that are further apart can in time be joined by various
means, especially by a couple’s accommodations to one another’s
wishes, by their performance of mutual duties, by their courteous
treatment of each other, by their refraining from things unchaste,
by their joint love of little children and care for their
children; but above all, by their conformity in matters connected
with the church. For through matters connected with the church a
joining of distant similarities is achieved inwardly, and only
outwardly through other means.No conjunction, however, can be achieved with dissimilar
qualities, because they are incompatible.
- 228. [Similarities can be joined]
- (20) For people who desire true married
love, the Lord provides a similar partner, and if one is not found
on earth, He provides one in heaven.- 229. [The Lord provides a partner]
229. (20) For people who desire true married love, the Lord
provides similar partners, and if they are not found on earth, He
provides them in heaven. This results from the fact that all
marriages of true married love are provided by the Lord. They come
from Him, as may be seen above in nos. 130,
131. But how they are provided in heaven, I
once heard described by angels as follows:[*1]The Lord’s Divine providence is most specific and most
universal in connection with marriages and in its operation in
marriages, because all delights of heaven flow from the delights
of married love, like sweet waters from a gushing spring. It is
therefore provided that marital pairs be born, and they are raised
and continually prepared for their marriages under the Lord’s
guidance, neither the boy nor the girl being aware of it. Then,
after a period of time, the girl – now a marriageable young woman
– and the boy – now a young man ready to marry – meet somewhere,
as though by fate, and notice each other. And they immediately
recognize, as if by a kind of instinct, that they are a match,
thinking to themselves as from a kind of inner dictate, the young
man, “she is mine,” and the young woman, “he is
mine.” Later, after this thought has for some time become
settled in the minds of each, they deliberately talk about it
together and pledge themselves to each other in marriage.We say as though by fate, by instinct and as from a kind of
dictate, when we mean by Divine providence, because when one is
unaware that it is Divine providence, that is how it appears. For
the Lord unveils their inner similarities so that they notice each
other.[*1] See the narrative account in no. 316
below, which includes the same statement in almost the same words
(316:3).
- 229. [The Lord provides a partner]
- (21) To the degree that a person’s married
love wanes and is lost, his character approaches that of an animal.- 230. [Loss of married love makes one like an
animal]230. (21) To the degree that a person’s married love wanes and
is lost, his character approaches that of an animal. The reason is
that the more a person is in a state of married love, the more
spiritual he is; and the more spiritual he is, the more human he
is. For human beings are born for life after death, and they
attain it because of their having in them a spiritual soul, to
which they can be elevated through the faculty of their intellect.
If, by the power likewise granted to it, a person’s will is then
elevated at the same time, after death the person lives the life
of heaven.The reverse is the case if one is in a state of love contrary
to married love. For the more a person is in a state like that,
the more natural in character he is; and a person who is merely
natural is like an animal in his lusts, appetites and resulting
delights, the only difference being that he still has the power to
elevate his intellect into the light of wisdom and also the power
to elevate his will into the warmth of heavenly love. No one loses
these faculties. As a consequence, even though a merely natural
person is like an animal in his lusts, appetites and resulting
delights, still he lives after death, though in a state
corresponding to the kind of life he led before.It can be seen from this that to the degree a person’s married
love wanes, his character approaches that of an animal. This seems
to be something that could be disputed, since it is possible for
married love to wane and be lost in people whose character is
nevertheless still human. But we are referring to people in the
grip of licentious love, who do not care about married love
therefore and for that reason experience its failure and loss.
- 230. [Loss of married love makes one like an
- The judges swayed by partiality, who were
the subject of the cry, “Oh, how just!” (no. 231).- 231. [False judges]
231. To this I will append three narrative accounts. Here is
the first:I once heard some clamorings from below, which sounded as
though they were gurgling up through water. I heard one clamor to
the left crying, “Oh, how just!” Another to the right
crying, “Oh, how learned!” And a third one behind me
crying, “Oh, how wise!” Then, because it struck me to
wonder whether there are any just, learned or wise people in hell,
I began to feel a wish to see if people of this sort might be
found there; and it was told me from heaven, “You will both
see and hear.”So I left home in the spirit, and I saw in the ground before me
an opening. I went over to it and looked down, and behold, it had
a stairway in it. I went down this stairway, and when I reached
the bottom, I saw fields covered with bushes intermixed with
thorns and nettles. When I asked whether I was in hell, the people
said it was a lower earth just above hell.I then proceeded in the direction of each of the clamors in
turn. Going first to the place where they were crying, “Oh,
how just!” I saw a gathering of people who in the world had
been judges swayed by partiality and gifts. Going next to the
place where they were crying, “Oh, how learned!” I saw a
gathering of people who in the world had been reasoners. And going
third to the place where they were crying, “Oh, how wise!”
I saw a gathering of people who in the world had been confirmers.[2] I turned back from these, however, to the first place,
where the judges were who were swayed by partiality and gifts and
who were proclaimed as just. There, over to one side, I saw a kind
of amphitheater, built out of bricks and having a roof of black
tiles; and I was told that they called it the Tribunal. It had
three entrances opening into it on the north side, and three more
on the west side, but none on the south or east sides – an
indication that their judgments were not judgments having to do
with justice but arbitrary rulings.Inside I saw in the middle of the amphitheater a fireplace,
into which the keepers of the hearth were throwing torches covered
with sulfur and pitch. Shafts of light flickered out from these on
to the plastered walls and formed silhouetted images of birds of
the evening and night. At the same time, this fireplace, and the
shafts of light flickering out into silhouettes of these images,
were representations of their judgments, reflecting their ability
to illumine the issues in any case with colored hues and to shape
them as they pleased.[3] After a half-hour had passed, I saw some older and younger
men entering in gowns and robes; and laying aside their caps, they
seated themselves at tables, ready to sit in judgment. I then
heard and observed how skillfully and cleverly they avoided any
appearance of favoritism, turning their judgments into semblances
of justice, and this to the point that they themselves viewed
injustice as nothing other than just, and justice, conversely, as
unjust. Their persuasions in regard to these matters were apparent
to the eye from their faces and discernible to the ear from their
comments.I was given at that point enlightenment from heaven, which
enabled me to perceive in each case whether the rulings were in
accordance with the law or not; and I saw to what lengths they
went to camouflage injustice and give it the guise of justice,
picking out from the laws some one that might support them and
drawing the rest to their side through clever reasonings.After rendering their judgments, the judges would have their
verdicts conveyed out to their clients, friends and supporters;
and to repay them for their favor, these would cry out for some
distance along the road, “Oh, how just! Oh, how just!”[4] I afterwards spoke with angels of heaven about these events
and told them some of the things I had seen and heard. The angels
said to me that judges like that appear to others as though
endowed with an exceptional keenness of understanding, when in
fact they do not have the least inkling of what is just and fair.“If you take away their partiality for one side or the
other,” they said, “they sit on their benches as mute as
statues, saying only, I agree, I go along with this person or I go
along with that person. That is because all their judgments are
prejudgments, and their prejudgment pursues each case from
beginning to end with a biased one-sidedness. Consequently they
see only the side which involves a friend. Every point that is
against him they move to the periphery; and if they take it up
again, they entangle it in reasonings, as a spider does its prey
in the threads of its web – and so destroy it.“That is why, if they do not follow the web of some
prejudgment of theirs, they do not have any inkling of the law.
They have been examined to see whether they might have some
inkling of it, and it was found that they did not. The inhabitants
of your world will be surprised that such is the case, but tell
them it is a truth investigated by angels of heaven.“Since these judges lack any sight of justice,” they
continued, “in heaven we view them as being not human but
monsters, whose heads are shaped by elements of partisanship,
their breasts by elements of injustice, and their feet by matters
of confirmation – with only the soles of their feet being formed
by matters of justice, which they step on and trample into the
ground if these do not favor some friend of theirs.“However, you will see for yourself how they look to us
from heaven, for their end is near.”[5] And lo, suddenly then the ground opened, so that tables
after tables went tumbling down, and they and their whole
amphitheater were swallowed up. And they were cast into caverns
and made prisoners there.Then the angels said to me, “Would you like to see them
now?”And behold, in respect to their faces they appeared as though
made of burnished steel. In respect to their bodies from the neck
to the loins they looked like figures carved out of stone, dressed
in leopard skins. And in respect to their feet they looked like
serpents. I also saw the lawbooks, which they had had lying on
their tables, turned into playing cards. And now, instead of
judging, they were given the task of processing pigments into
cosmetics with which to paint the faces of harlots and so turn
them into beauties.[6] After seeing this, I was ready to go on to the other two
gatherings, to the one where the people were merely reasoners, and
to the other where they were merely confirmers. But at that point
the angels said to me, “Rest a while. You will be given
angels from the society just above those places to accompany you.
Through them you will receive light from the Lord, and you will
see some astonishing sights.”
- 231. [False judges]
- The reasoners who were the subject of the
cry, “Oh, how learned!” (no. 232).- 232. [Reasoners]
232. The second account:
Some time later, I again heard from the land below the same
cries as before, “Oh, how learned!” and “Oh, how
wise!” So I looked around to see what angels were then
present, and lo, they were angels who lived in the heaven just
above the people who were crying out, “Oh, how learned!”
I therefore spoke to them about the clamor, and the angels said
that the people acclaimed as learned there were the sort who only
reason about whether a thing is so or not and rarely think that it
is.“Consequently they are like gusts of wind,” they
said, “which blow and pass away, or like coverings of bark
around trees which have no core, or like shells around almonds
without a kernel, or like rinds around fruits without any flesh.
For their minds lack any inner judgment and are connected only
with their physical senses. If the senses themselves are
inadequate to form a judgment, therefore, they can reach no
conclusion. In a word, they are merely sense-oriented, and by us
are called reasoners.“We call them reasoners because they never reach any
conclusion. Instead they take up whatever they hear and argue
about whether it is so, constantly contradicting themselves. They
like nothing more than to attack actual truths and thus tear them
apart by turning them into matters of dispute. They are the sort
of people who think they are more learned than all others in the
world.”[2] When I heard this, I asked the angels to take me down to
them. So they took me to a cave which had steps leading down to a
lower earth. We then descended and followed in the direction of
the clamor “Oh, how learned!” And suddenly we saw
several hundred people standing in the same place, trampling the
soil with their feet. Being astonished by this at first, I asked
why they were standing together like that and stamping away at the
soil. “At that rate they may use their feet to make a hole in
the ground,” I said.The angels chuckled at this and said, “They appear as
standing there like that because on any subject they regard
nothing as being so, but only consider whether it is and make it a
matter of debate. So, since their thought goes no further, they
appear only to tread and wear away the same patch of ground
without making any progress.”At that point I then went over to the gathering; and behold,
they seemed to me to be people of not unhandsome appearance and
dressed in elegant clothing. But the angels said, “That is
how they seem in their own light; but if light from heaven flows
in, their appearance changes, and also their clothing.” This,
too, actually happened; and then they appeared with dark faces,
clothed in black sacks. However, when the light from heaven was
taken away, they looked as they had before.Shortly afterwards I spoke with some of them and said, “I
heard the clamor of the crowd around you, crying “Oh, how
learned!” Allow me to explore with you, therefore, some
discussion on subjects which are matters of the highest learning.”[3] To which they replied, “Name any subject you please
and we will give you an answer.”So I asked, “What must the nature of a person’s religion
for him to be saved by it?”In answer they said, “We need to divide this question into
several parts, and we cannot give a reply before we come to a
conclusion in regard to these. The first consideration must be
whether there is anything to religion. Second, whether there is
any salvation or not. Third, whether one religion is of any more
avail than another. Fourth, whether there is a heaven and a hell.
Fifth, whether there is any eternal life after death. And many
other considerations besides.”So I asked about the first, whether there is anything to
religion. And they began to discuss it, advancing a number of
arguments over whether there is any religion, and whether there is
anything to what is called religion.I then asked them to refer the question to the whole gathering,
which they did. And the collective response was that the question
as put required so much investigation that they could not resolve
it by the end of the evening.“Could you resolve it in a year?” I asked.
And one of them said it could not be resolved in a hundred
years.“But meanwhile,” I said, “you are without
religion.”To which he replied, “Do we not have to show first whether
there is any religion, and whether there is anything to what is
called religion? If there is, religion must exist for the wise as
well. If not, it must exist only for the common people. We all
know that religion is said to be a tie that binds, but the
question is, for whom? If only for the common people, then in
essence there is nothing in it. If for the wise as well, then
there is something in it.”[4] On hearing this I said to them, “You are not learned
at all, because you can only speculate about whether a thing is so
without settling it either way. Who can become learned without
knowing anything for certain, and without making any progress
towards it in the way that any person progresses, step by step,
and so gradually into wisdom? Otherwise you do not lay so much as
a fingernail on truths but remove them further and further out of
sight.“If you reason only about whether a thing is so, is that
not like reasoning about the fit of a hat which is never tried on,
or about the fit of a shoe which no one wears? What other
consequence results but your not knowing whether anything is
anything – including, indeed, whether there is any salvation,
whether there is any eternal life after death, whether one
religion is of any more avail than another, whether there is a
heaven and a hell. You cannot have any thought about such things
so long as you remain stuck at the first step and keep pounding
away at the same piece of ground there without putting one foot in
front of the other and moving forward.“You had better take care that while your minds are
standing outside the temple of judgment like that, they do not
harden within and turn into pillars of salt, and you become the
companions of Lot’s wife.”[5] So saying I turned and went, and in anger they hurled
stones after me. And at that point they appeared to me like
figures carved out of stone, having nothing of human reason in
them.I then asked the angels about their fate; and the angels said,
“Their fate is to be let down into an abyss, and there into a
wilderness, where they are forced to carry packs. Moreover,
because they are then unable to utter anything from their reason,
they prattle and talk nonsense; and from a distance there they
look like donkeys bearing burdens.”
- 232. [Reasoners]
- The confirmers who were the subject of the
cry, “Oh, how wise!” (no. 233).- 233. [Confirmers]
233. The third account:
After this, one of the angels said, “Follow me to the
place where they are crying out, “Oh, how wise!””
And he added, “You will see human monstrosities. The faces
and bodies you see will be like those of a human being, and yet
they are not human.”So I said, “Are they animals, then?”
The angel replied, “No, they are not animals, but
animal-like. For they are people who cannot see at all whether
truth is true or not, and yet whatever they wish they can make to
be true. Among us, people like that are called confirmers.”We then followed the clamor and came to the place. And lo, we
found a group of men surrounded by a crowd of people, and in the
crowd some people of noble lineage. The men were confirming
whatever the latter said and agreeing with them with such manifest
accord that when they heard it, they turned to each other and
said, “Oh, how wise!”[2] However, the angel said to me, “Let us not go over to
them but instead call one of them out of the group.”So we called one of them to us, and going aside with him, we
talked about various matters. And he confirmed each point so
thoroughly that they all appeared entirely as true.We then asked him whether he could also confirm the converse of
these. He said that he could, just as well as he did the previous
ones. At which point he said openly and from the heart, “What
is truth? Is there any truth in the nature of things other than
what a person makes true? Say to me anything you please and I will
make it to be true.”So I said, “Make this true, that faith is everything in
the church.” And he did so, so cleverly and skillfully that
some learned bystanders looked on in admiration and applauded. I
asked him next to make it true that charity is everything in the
church, which he did, and afterwards that charity is nothing in
the church. And he dressed up both propositions and arrayed them
in such verisimilitudes that the bystanders looked at each other
and said, “Isn’t he wise!”But I said, “Do you not know that to live rightly is
charity, and to believe rightly is faith? If anyone lives rightly,
does he not also believe rightly? Thus showing that faith is
connected with charity, and charity with faith? Do you not see
that this is true?”He replied, “I will make it true and then I will see.”
And having done it he said, “Now I see.” But shortly he
made the converse of it to be true, and then he said, “I see
as well that this is true.”We chuckled at this and said, “But are these not
contradictory conclusions? How can you see two contrary
conclusions as true?”Nettled by our response, he replied, “You are wrong. Both
conclusions are true, since truth is only what a person makes
true.”[3] Standing nearby was someone who in the world had been an
ambassador of the highest rank. He marveled at this and said, “I
recognize that something of this sort goes on in the world, but
still you are insane. Make it to be true, if you can, that light
is darkness, and darkness light.”To which he replied, “I will do it easily. What are light
and darkness but conditions of the eye? Does light not turn to
darkness when the eye comes in out of bright sunshine? Or when it
gazes intently at the sun? Who does not know that the state of the
eye then changes and that light consequently appears as darkness?
And conversely, that when the condition of the eye recovers, the
darkness appears as light?“Does an owl not see the darkness of night as the light of
day, and the light of day as the darkness of night? Does it not
see the sun itself as a dark and shadowy orb? If a person had eyes
like an owl’s, what would he call light and what would he call
darkness?“What then is light but a condition of the eye? And if it
is a condition of the eye, is not light darkness and darkness
light? Consequently the one proposition is true and the other is
true.”[4] After that the ambassador asked him to make it to be true
that a raven is white and not black.To which he replied, “I will do this easily, too. Take a
needle or razor,” he said, “and open up the feathers or
quills of a raven. Are they not white inside? Then remove the
feathers and quills and look at the raven’s skin. Is it not white?
What is the blackness surrounding it but an opaqueness to light,
which is hardly a basis on which to judge the raven’s color? If
you do not know that blackness is only an absence of light, ask
experts in the science of optics and they will tell you. Or grind
a piece of black stone or black glass into a fine powder, and you
will see that the powder is white.”“But,” said the ambassador, “does a raven look
black to the eye?”“Perhaps,” replied this confirmer of ours, “but
as a human being, are you willing to base what you think on an
appearance? You may indeed speak in accordance with the appearance
and say that a raven is black, but you cannot think it. As for
example, you may speak in accordance with the appearance and say
that the sun rises, travels and sets, but as a human being you
cannot think it, because the sun stands still and it is the earth
that moves. It is the same with the raven. An appearance is only
an appearance. Say what you will, a raven is totally and utterly
white. It even turns white when it grows old, as I have observed.”[5] We then asked him to tell us honestly whether he was joking
or whether he really believed that there is no truth but what a
person makes true. And he answered, “I swear that I believe
it.”After that the ambassador asked him whether he could make it
true that he was insane. To which he said, “I could, but I do
not want to. Who is not insane?”This total confirmer was afterwards sent to some angels for
them to examine and determine what sort of person he was. And
having examined him, they said he possessed not even a grain of
understanding, because everything that exists above the level of
reason in him was closed up, and only that which is below the
level of reason was open.“Above the level of reason,” they said, “is the
light of heaven, and below the level of reason is the light of
nature. And the light of nature is such that it can confirm
whatever it pleases. However, if the light of heaven does not flow
into the light of nature, a person does not see whether any truth
is true, and so neither whether any falsity is false. An ability
to see both what is true and what is false results from the
presence of light from heaven in the light of nature, and the
light of heaven comes from the God of heaven, who is the Lord.“This total confirmer is therefore neither human nor
animal, but animal-like.”[6] I asked the angel with me about the fate of people like
that and whether it was possible for them to be among the living,
since a person has life from the light of heaven, and from it
comes his intellect. And the angel said that when people of this
sort are by themselves, they are incapable of thought and so have
nothing to say, but stand as mute as machines, as though in a deep
sleep; but as soon as something catches their ears, they awaken.
He added also that people become like that who are inmostly evil.
“The light of heaven cannot flow into them from above,”
he said, “but only some spiritual element through the world,
from which they have an ability to confirm.”[7] After he said this, I heard the voice of one of the angels
who had examined the man, calling to me and saying, “From
what you have heard draw an overall conclusion.”So I drew the following conclusion: An ability to confirm
whatever one pleases is not the mark of an intelligent person;
rather, the mark of an intelligent person is to be able to see
that truth is true and falsity false, and to confirm that.I afterwards looked over at the gathering where the confirmers
stood and where the crowd surrounding them was beginning to cry
out, “Oh, how wise!” And suddenly a dusky cloud
enveloped them, with screech owls and bats flitting about in the
cloud.It was then explained to me, “The owls and bats flitting
about in the dusky cloud are correspondent forms and thus
manifestations of their thoughts. For in this world, confirmations
of falsities to the point that they appear as truths are
represented under the forms of birds of the night, whose eyes are
lit up with an illusory light from within by which they see
objects in darkness as though in light. This is the kind of
illusory spiritual light had by those who confirm falsities to the
point that they appear as truths, and who afterwards say and
believe they are truths. They all possess a kind of after-sight
and not any prior sight.”
- 233. [Confirmers]
-
- 234. REASONS IN MARRIAGE FOR COLD STATES,
SEPARATION AND DIVORCE-
- 234. [Cold, separation and divorce]
In considering in this chapter reasons for cold states in
marriage, we take up also at the same time grounds for separation
and divorce. We do this because they are interconnected; for
separations come about only as a result of cold states
progressively developed after marriage, or as a result of factors
discovered after marriage which in turn lead to coldness. Divorce,
moreover, is impelled by acts of adultery, because these are
completely opposed to marriage, and being opposed they induce
coldness, if not in both partners, still in the one.That is why we put reasons for cold states, separation and
divorce together into the same chapter. The interconnection between
the reasons, however, is more clearly perceived from seeing them in
sequence. A sequential arrangement of them is as follows:(1) People experience spiritual warmth and spiritual coldness;
and spiritual warmth is love, while spiritual coldness is its
absence and loss.(2) Spiritual coldness in marriage is a disunion of souls and
disjunction of minds, resulting in indifference, discord, contempt,
loathing, and aversion, and leading finally in many cases to
separation from the bed, bedroom and house.(3) Reasons for cold states in their gradual progressions are
many, some of them internal, some external, and some incidental.(4) Internal reasons for cold states stem from religion.
(5) Of these reasons, the first is rejection of religion by both
partners.(6) A second is one partner’s having religion and not the other.
(7) A third is one partner’s having one religion and the other
partner another.(8) A fourth is ingrained falsity of religion.
(9) These are causes of an inward coldness, but in many cases
not at the same time of an outward one.(10) External reasons for coldness are also many; and of these,
the first is a dissimilarity of dispositions and manners.(11) A second is believing that married love is no different
from licentious love, only that the latter is forbidden by law,
while the former is allowed.(12) A third is competition between the partners for
superiority.(13) A fourth is an absence of focus on any pursuit or business,
resulting in promiscuous lust.(14) A fifth is inequality of station and condition in the
partners’ outward circumstances.(15) There are also several reasons for separation.
(16) Of these, the first is an impairment of the mind.
(17) A second is an impairment of the body.
(18) A third is impotence prior to marriage.
(19) Adultery is ground for divorce.
(20) Incidental reasons for coldness are also many; and of
these, the first is ordinariness from being continually allowed.(21) A second is the sense that living with one’s partner is
compelled by covenant and law and not free.(22) A third is declaration by the wife of her love and
discourse by her about it.(23) A fourth is the man’s thinking of his wife day and night
that she wants to, and conversely the wife’s thinking of her
husband that he does not want to.(24) As coldness develops in the mind, so it also develops in
the body; and in the measure that this coldness grows, the outward
aspects of the body close up as well.Explanation of these statements now follows.
- 234. [Cold, separation and divorce]
- (1) People experience spiritual warmth and
spiritual coldness; and spiritual warmth is love, while spiritual
coldness is its absence and loss.- 235. [Spiritual warmth and cold]
235. (1) People experience spiritual warmth and spiritual
coldness; and spiritual warmth is love, while spiritual coldness
is its absence and loss. Spiritual warmth originates from no other
source than the sun of the spiritual world. For the sun there is
an emanation from the Lord, who is in the midst of it; and being
from the Lord, in its essence that sun is pure love. That sun
appears to angels as a ball of fire, just as the sun of our world
does to men. It appears as a ball of fire because love is
spiritual fire. From that sun emanate both heat and light, but
because that sun is pure love, the heat from it in its essence is
love, and the light from it in its essence is wisdom.This makes clear the origin of spiritual warmth and the fact
that it is love.[2] The origin of spiritual coldness, moreover, will also be
briefly explained. It originates from the sun of the natural world
and its heat and light.The sun of the natural world was created so that its heat and
light might receive into them spiritual heat and light and by
means of its atmospheres convey them even to the lowest elements
in the world. Their purpose was to produce the effects of those
ends which, being the Lord’s, exist in the spiritual sun, and also
to clothe spiritual things with coverings or materials adequate to
bring about final ends in nature. This is what happens when
spiritual heat is joined to and contained in natural heat.The contrary happens, however, when natural heat is separated
from spiritual heat, as is the case in people who love natural
things and reject spiritual ones. In them spiritual warmth becomes
coldness. These two kinds of heat, by creation in harmony, thus
become opposed to each other, and the reason is that the master
heat then becomes the servant heat, and the servant heat the
master. So, to keep this from happening, spiritual heat withdraws,
which by right of its origin is the master; and spiritual warmth
in these recipient vessels then grows cold, because it becomes
opposed.It is apparent from this what spiritual coldness is – that it
is the 3absence and loss of spiritual heat. (In what we have just
said, by heat we mean love, because spiritual heat in animate
recipients is felt as love.)I have heard in the spiritual world that merely natural spirits
experience an intense coldness whenever they attach themselves to
the side of some angel who is feeling a state of love. Also that
spirits in hell have the same experience whenever warmth from
heaven flows in upon them – even though among themselves, when the
warmth of heaven is shut off and withdrawn, they burn with great
heat.
- 235. [Spiritual warmth and cold]
- (2) Spiritual coldness in marriage is a
disunion of souls and disjunction of minds, resulting in
indifference, discord, contempt, loathing, and aversion, and leading
finally in many cases to separation from the bed, bedroom and house.- 236. [Cold is disunion]
236. (2) Spiritual coldness in marriage is a disunion of souls
and disjunction of minds, resulting in indifference, discord,
contempt, loathing, and aversion, and leading finally in many
cases to separation from the bed, bedroom and house. It is too
well known to require any comment that this is what happens
between married partners when their original love fades and turns
cold.These states occur because coldness in marriage is seated more
deeply in human minds than any other feelings of coldness. For the
essence of the married relationship is engraved on the soul, in
order that one soul may be procreated from another and the
father’s soul propagated into offspring. As a result, marital
coldness starts there, and progressively descending into
subsequent elements it infects these as well, and so turns the
happy and delightful states of the earlier love into sad and
unpleasant ones.
- 236. [Cold is disunion]
- (3) Reasons for cold states in their gradual
progressions are many, some of them internal, some external, and
some incidental.- 237. [Many reasons for cold states]
237. (3) Reasons for cold states in their gradual progressions
are many, some of them internal, some external, and some
incidental. People know in the world that there are many reasons
for cold states in marriage, also that they arise as a result of a
number of external factors. They do not know, however, that the
origins of these factors lie hidden in the inmost recesses of a
person, and that they develop from them into subsequent elements
until they appear in their outward manifestations.Consequently, to make it known that external factors are not
reasons in themselves, but stem from others that are the reasons
in themselves, which – as we said – lie in the inmost recesses of
a person, we therefore first distinguish these reasons generally
into internal and external ones, and then explore them
individually.
- 237. [Many reasons for cold states]
- (4) Internal reasons for cold states stem
from religion.-
- 238. [Inner cold is from religion]
238. (4) Internal reasons for cold states stem from religion.
The real origin of married love is seated in the inmost recesses
in a person, that is to say, in his soul, and everyone is
convinced of this simply from the following considerations:The soul of offspring comes from the father – a fact that is
recognized from their similarity in inclinations and affections,
and also from the commonality of their facial features, persisting
from the father even in a much later generation. Secondly, the
procreative ability was implanted from creation in souls. And in
addition, one finds an analogous parallel in members of the
vegetable kingdom, in that reproduction of the seed itself, and
thus of the whole plant, lies within the inmost workings of their
germinations, whether it be a tree, bush or shrub.[2] This reproductive or creative force in seeds in the
vegetable kingdom, and in souls in the animal kingdom, originates
from no other source than the conjugal atmosphere – the atmosphere
of good and truth which continually emanates and flows in from the
Lord, the Creator and Sustainer of the universe (concerning which
above, nos. 222-225) – and from the effort of
these two in it – good and truth – to join themselves into one.
This conjugal effort inherent in souls is the motive force from
which married love springs in the first place.The same marriage from which this universal atmosphere flows
also forms the church in a person, as we have shown amply enough
and more in the chapter on “The Marriage of the Lord and the
Church”[*1] and in a number of other places.[*2]It is fully and plainly apparent to the sight of reason from
this that the origin of the church and the origin of married love
have the same seat in a person, and that they are locked in a
continual embrace. For more on this subject, however, see no. 130
above, where we showed that married love depends on the state of
the church in a person, consequently that it stems from religion,
because it is religion which forms that state.[3] Besides, people were created to be able to become more and
more interior beings, thus to be introduced or elevated nearer and
nearer to a marriage of good and truth and so into true married
love, to the point that they feel its state of bliss. The only
means by which they can be introduced or elevated is religion,
which is clearly apparent from what we have already said, that the
origin of the church and the origin of married love have the same
seat in a person and are there locked in a continual embrace, so
that they cannot help but be joined together.[*1] The original text reads “the marriage of good and
truth,” as though in reference to the chapter, “The
Origin of married love from the Marriage between Good and Truth,”
nos. 83ff; but comparison of the contents of the
chapters indicates that this is probably a slip of the pen for
“The Marriage of the Lord and the Church,” nos. 116ff.
See especially no. 122 there.
- 238. [Inner cold is from religion]
- 239. [If religion is lacking, so is love]
239. From what we have now said, it follows that where religion
is lacking, married love does not exist either; and where married
love does not exist, coldness develops instead. It may be seen in
no. 235 above that coldness in marriage is the
absence and loss of that love. It follows by the same token that
coldness in marriage is also the absence or loss of a state of the
church or of religion in a person.Sufficiently corroborative evidence of this may be inferred
from the general ignorance today regarding true married love. Who
today knows that the origin of married love in a person stems from
religion? Who today is even willing to acknowledge it, and who
today would not be surprised by it? But this circumstance is owing
altogether to the fact that although religion exists, its truths
do not; and what is religion without truths? (We showed in full in
The Apocalypse Revealed that these truths are lacking. See also
the narrative accounts there in no. 566.)
-
- (5) Of these reasons, the first is rejection
of religion by both partners.- 240. [Both reject religion]
240. (5) Of these internal reasons for cold states, the first
is rejection of religion by both partners. No good love exists in
people who reject the sanctities of the church and banish them
from the front of their heads to the back, or from before their
hearts to behind them. If any seemingly good love is manifested by
the body, still none exists in the spirit. In people like this,
good virtues surround evils and cover them up, like a garment
glistening with gold but covering up a decayed and putrid body. In
general, the evils which lie within and are covered up are
feelings of hatred for and so internal battles against everything
spiritual. For all matters having to do with the church, which
they reject, are essentially spiritual.So, because true married love is the fundamental love of all
spiritual loves (as we have shown previously),[*1] it is apparent
that people like this have an inward hatred for it, and that they
have an inward or inherent love for its opposite, which is a love
of adultery. Consequently they, more than others, may be expected
to ridicule this truth, that everyone possesses married love
according to the state of the church in him. Indeed, they may
guffaw perhaps at the mere mention of true married love. But let
them laugh. Yet they must be pardoned, because it is as impossible
for them to think of embraces in marriage as any different from
embraces in licentious relationships, as it is for a camel to
force its way through the eye of a needle.[*2]People who are of this character experience a greater coldness
than others in respect to married love. If they remain faithful to
their married partners, they do so only for some of the external
reasons recounted above in no. 153, which hold
them and keep them from straying. In their case, the inner
faculties, which are faculties of the soul and from that of the
mind, are more and more closed up, and in the body obstructed; and
then even love for the opposite sex becomes a matter of
indifference, or it smolders with an insane lasciviousness in the
interior recesses of the body and so in the bottommost elements of
their thought.People like this are also meant by the ones in the narrative
account in no. 79. Let them read it if they
like.[*2] Cf. Matthew 19:24, Mark 10:25, Luke 18:25.
- 240. [Both reject religion]
- (6) A second is one partner’s having
religion and not the other.- 241. [Different religions]
241. (6) Of these internal reasons for cold states, a second is
one partner’s having religion and not the other. The reason is
that their souls cannot help but be discordant. For the soul of
one is open to receiving married love, while the soul of the other
is closed to receiving it. It is closed in the one who is without
religion, and open in the one who has religion. Consequently it is
impossible for them to dwell together on that level; and when
married love is banished there, coldness develops – though only in
the partner without religion.This coldness is not dispelled except by that partner’s
acceptance of religion in harmony with the religion of the other,
if the other’s religion is true. Otherwise, in the partner who has
no religion, coldness sets in, which descends from the soul into
the body until it reaches the outer coverings of the skin. The
result is that he finally cannot bear to look his partner directly
in the face, or speak to her in such a manner as to breathe the
same air, or address her in anything but a restrained tone of
voice, or touch her with his hand, and scarcely even to feel her
at his back. We refrain from mentioning in addition the insanities
ensuing from that coldness which creep into the thoughts of people
like this, insanities which they keep hidden.This is the reason that marriages of this sort naturally
disintegrate.Besides, people know that an impious person has little regard
for his married partner; and all who are without religion are
impious.
- 241. [Different religions]
- (7) A third is one partner’s having one
religion and the other partner another.- 242. [One has no religion]
242. (7) Of these internal reasons for cold states, a third is
one partner’s having one religion and the other partner another.
The reason is that in their case good cannot be joined together
with its corresponding truth – for a wife in form is the good of
her husband’s truth, and he the truth of his wife’s goodness, as
we have previously shown.[*1] Consequently, it is impossible in
their case for their two souls to become one soul. The wellspring
of married love is therefore shut off; and when this is shut off,
they come into a married relationship that has its seat on a lower
level. This relationship is one of good with another truth than
its own, or of truth with another good than its own; and between
the two there cannot be any concordant love. The result is that
coldness develops in the partner who is caught up in falsities of
religion, and this coldness increases as he grows apart from the
other.(In a great city I once wandered the streets in order to find
lodging, and I entered a house where partners of different
religions were staying. I was unaware of it, but angels then spoke
to me, saying, “We cannot remain with you in this house,
because it has partners with discordant religions living in it.”
This they perceived from the inward lack of union between their
souls.)[*1] See, for example, nos. 21:2, 32,
33, 44:9, 61,
66, 75:5, 76:5,
88, 89, 90,
91, 100, 115:5,
122, 159, 193.
- 242. [One has no religion]
- (8) A fourth is ingrained falsity of
religion.- 243. [False religion]
243. (8) Of these internal reasons, a fourth is ingrained
falsity of religion. The reason is that falsity in spiritual
matters either does away with religion or corrupts it. It does
away with religion in the case of people who have falsified
genuine truths. It corrupts it in the case of people who have
acquired falsities indeed, but not genuine truths, which they
therefore could not falsify. In these latter people elements of
good may exist with which their falsities can be joined by the
Lord through adaptations of them; for these falsities are like
various discordant tones which through skillful interpolations and
insertions are drawn into a harmony, from which comes also the
pleasantness of the harmony.In people like this some married love is possible; but it is
not possible in people who have falsified genuine truths of the
church in themselves. They are the cause of the prevailing
ignorance concerning true married love or the skeptical doubt that
it is possible. They are also the source of the insane belief
residing in the minds of many that adulterous affairs are not
evils against religion.
- 243. [False religion]
- (9) These are causes of an inward coldness,
but in many cases not at the same time of an outward one.-
- 244. [Outward warmth with inner cold]
244. (9) The aforementioned reasons are causes of an inward
coldness, but in many cases not at the same time of an outward
one. The reasons enumerated and established so far are causes of
coldness in inward states. If the same reasons were to produce a
similar coldness in outward states, then as many separations would
occur as there are instances of inward coldness – and there are as
many instances of coldness as there are marriages of people who
are caught up in falsities of religion, who have different
religions, or who have no religion (which we have just discussed).
Yet we know that many of them live together as though they loved
each other and possessed a mutual friendship. Why this is so,
however, in the case of people who are in state of inward
coldness, will be told in the following chapter on the reasons for
apparent love, friendship and favor between married partners.[*1][2] Many circumstances occur which join minds together but do
not at the same time join souls. Among the circumstances are some
of those recounted above in no. 153. But still
an inner coldness lies hidden within, and this coldness makes
itself periodically noticed and felt. In such marriages, the
partners depart from each other in their affections, and only draw
together in their thoughts whenever these are manifested in their
speech and behavior, in order to preserve an appearance of
friendship and favor. In consequence they know nothing of the
pleasantness and pleasure of true married love, and even less of
its felicity and bliss. To them these are little more than fables.People like this are among those who imagine the origins of
married love from the same causes as the nine companies of wise
men assembled from the kingdoms of Europe, as reported in a
narrative account earlier, nos. 103-114.[*1] See nos. 271ff.
- 244. [Outward warmth with inner cold]
- 245. [Offspring of disunited souls]
245. To what we have just affirmed, an objection may be raised
on the ground that life is still procreated from the father’s life
– even if his soul is not united with the soul of the mother –
indeed, even if a deep-seated coldness there separates them. But
souls or offspring are nevertheless still procreated for the
reason that a man’s intellect is not so closed up that it cannot
be elevated into the light that the soul is in (in contrast with
love in his will, which is not elevated into a warmth
corresponding to the light there except by his living a life which
transforms his character from natural to spiritual).It is owing to this that life is still procreated, but during
its descent, until it becomes seed or sperm, the soul is enveloped
by elements of a type that have to do with the father’s natural
love. This is the source from which hereditary evil springs.To this I will add a secret, which I have from heaven, that
between two disunited souls, especially those of married partners,
conjunction is accomplished in the area of some intermediary love.
Otherwise conceptions would not occur among human beings.(For more on the subject of coldness in marriage and where it
has its seat – namely, in the highest region of the mind – see the
concluding narrative account at the end of this chapter, no. 270.)
-
- (10) External reasons for coldness are also
many; and of these, the first is a dissimilarity of dispositions and
manners.- 246. [Dissimilar dispositions]
246. (10) External reasons for coldness are also many; and of
these, the first is a dissimilarity of dispositions and manners.
Some similarities and dissimilarities are internal, and some are
external. Internal ones trace their origin solely from religion;
for religion is implanted in souls, and it is transmitted through
souls from parents to offspring as a supreme predisposition. The
reason is that every person’s soul draws its life from a marriage
of good and truth, and from this marriage comes the church. Now
because the church varies and differs throughout the regions of
the entire globe, therefore the souls of all human beings also
vary and differ. This is consequently the origin of people’s
internal similarities and dissimilarities, and in accordance with
them the marital conjunctions of which we have spoken.[2] In contrast, external similarities and dissimilarities are
qualities not of souls but of dispositions. By dispositions we
mean people’s outward affections and consequent inclinations which
are implanted after birth chiefly through their upbringings,
associations, and resulting habits. Indeed, people say, “I
have a disposition to do this,” or “a disposition to do
that,” and we comprehend by this an affection or inclination
for it. Acquired persuasions respecting one kind of life or
another usually shape these dispositions as well. They are what
induce inclinations in some even to enter marriages with partners
not their equals and also to refuse marriages with ones who are.
Nevertheless, after the partners have lived together for a time,
these marriages vary according to the similarities and
dissimilarities which the partners have acquired both by heredity
and their accompanying upbringing. Any dissimilarities then induce
coldness.[3] It is the same with dissimilarities in manners. As for
example, in the marriage of an uncouth man or woman with one who
is refined; of a cleanly man or woman with one who is slovenly; of
a quarrelsome man or woman with one who is peaceable – in short,
in the marriage of an unmannerly man or woman with one who is
well-mannered.Marriages exhibiting such dissimilarities are not unlike
couplings of different animal species with each other – as, for
example, of sheep and goats, deers and mules, chickens and geese,
sparrows and more noble birds – indeed, of dogs and cats – which
because of their dissimilarities do not naturally associate. In
human beings, however, dissimilarities do not show in surface
features but in habits of behavior. States of coldness therefore
arise because of this.
- 246. [Dissimilar dispositions]
- (11) A second is believing that married love
is no different from licentious love, only that the latter is
forbidden by law, while the former is allowed.- 247. [Confusing lust and love]
247. (11) Of these external reasons for coldness, a second is
believing that married love is no different from licentious love,
only that the latter is forbidden by law, while the former is
allowed. Reason clearly sees that this leads to coldness when it
considers that licentious love is diametrically opposed to married
love. Consequently, when one believes that married love is no
different from licentious love, so that the two loves are regarded
as the same in idea, then the wife is looked upon as a whore, and
the marriage as something unclean. The man, too, is himself an
adulterer – if not in body, nevertheless in spirit.It inevitably follows that between the man and “his
woman,” contempt, loathing, and aversion break out because of
this, and thus intense coldness. For nothing harbors a coldness to
marriage within it more than licentious love. And because it also
goes off into coldness, it may not unjustifiably be called the
very essence of coldness in marriage.
- 247. [Confusing lust and love]
- (12) A third is competition between the
partners for superiority.- 248. [Struggle for superiority]
248. (12) Of these external reasons, a third is competition
between the partners for superiority. The reason is that among the
first aspirations of married love is a union of wills and a
consequent freedom of volition. Vying for superiority or control
expels these two from the marriage, for it divides and separates
the wills into two camps and turns freedom of volition into
servitude.So long as this struggle persists, the spirit of one partner
imagines acts of violence against the other. If their minds were
to be laid open in this state and made visible to spiritual sight,
they would appear as though battling with daggers. They would also
be seen to look upon each other with alternating feelings of
hatred and favor – with feelings of hatred when caught up in the
heat of combat, and with feelings of favor whenever they achieve
hope of supremacy or are prompted by lust.[2] Later, when one partner has gained victory over the other,
although this conflict disappears from outward manifestations, it
recedes into the inner recesses of the mind, where it remains in a
concealed state of agitation. The result is coldness on the part
of the one made subject or servant, and also on the part of the
one who has become victor or master. Coldness develops on the part
of the latter as well, because married love no longer exists, and
the absence or loss of this love is coldness (no. 235).
Instead of married love, the victor feels a warmth resulting from
superiority; but this warmth is wholly incompatible with any
marital warmth, however similar it may be outwardly when prompted
by lust.After the partners come to a tacit agreement between them, it
appears as though married love has turned into friendship. But the
difference between marital friendship and a master-servant
friendship in marriage is like the difference between light and
dark, between a blazing fire and a cold phosphorescence – indeed,
like the difference between a person fully fleshed and one
consisting only of skin and bone.
- 248. [Struggle for superiority]
- (13) A fourth is an absence of focus on any
pursuit or business, resulting in promiscuous lust.- 249. [Laziness]
249. (13) Of these external reasons for coldness, a fourth is
an absence of focus on any pursuit or business, resulting in
promiscuous lust. Human beings were created to be useful, because
useful service is the containing vessel of goodness and truth, and
a marriage of good and truth is the origin both of creation and
also of married love (as we showed in its own chapter).[*1]By pursuit or business we mean any effort to be useful. When as
a result a person is engaged in some pursuit or business or other
useful activity, his mind is fenced around and circumscribed as
though with a circle, within whose bounds it is progressively
ordered into truly human form. Then, from this vantage point, as
though looking out from its house, it sees various impure passions
lurking outside, and from the sanity of its reason within,
banishes them, thus banishing as well the wild insanities of
licentious lust. Because of this, marital warmth lasts better and
longer in such people than it does in others.[2] The contrary happens in the case of people who surrender
themselves to laziness and sloth. Their mind is not fenced around
or set within bounds; a person like that consequently throws open
the whole of it and lets in every sort of nonsense and foolishness
which flows in from the world and the body and draws him into a
love of them. It is apparent that married love is also then cast
out and banished. For laziness and sloth dull the mind and numb
the body, and the whole person becomes unresponsive to any
vitalizing love – especially married love, from which, as from a
fountain, spring active and energetic states of life.In such people, however, the coldness they feel in marriage is
different from the same coldness in others. It is indeed an
absence and loss of married love, but from a failure of ability.[*1] See “The Origin of married love from the Marriage
between Good and Truth,” nos. 83ff.
- 249. [Laziness]
- (14) A fifth is inequality of station and
condition in the partners’ outward circumstances.- 250. [Class differences]
250. (14) Of these external reasons, a fifth is inequality of
station and condition in the partners’ outward circumstances. Many
inequalities in station and condition occur which during a
couple’s life together sunder the initial married love they felt
before their wedding. However, these can all be assigned to
inequalities in their ages, in their positions in society, and in
their possessions of wealth.With respect to age, it requires no argument to show that age
differences induce coldness in marriages, as in the marriage of a
boy with an old woman, or of an adolescent girl with a decrepit
old man.With respect to position in society, it is also acknowledged
without need for confirmation that class differences likewise
induce coldness in marriages, as in the marriage of an upper-class
man with a maidservant, or of a prominent lady with a manservant.With respect to possessions of wealth, it is apparent that
differences in these induce coldness as well – unless the partners
are kept together by a similarity in dispositions and manners and
by an adaptation of each to the inclinations and native desires of
the other.In none of these circumstances, however, does meek submission
in deference to the superior station or condition of the other
serve to unite the partners, except in the manner of a servant
with its master. Yet a union like that is a cold one; for the
marital bond in such cases is not a matter of the spirit and
heart, but only of the mouth and name, of which the inferior
boasts and which causes the superior to blush with shame.In contrast, in heaven one does not find a difference in
partners’ ages, positions in society, or possessions of wealth.
With respect to age, all there are in the flower of their youth,
and they remain in it to eternity. With respect to position in
society, all there regard others in accordance with the useful
services they render, with the more eminent in position viewing
those lower as comrades. Nor do they put status before the value
of service, but the value of service before status. Besides, when
girls there get married, they do not know from what family they
have descended; for no one in heaven knows who his father was on
earth, but the Lord is the father of all.It is similar with respect to possessions of wealth. Riches
there are their gifts for becoming wise. In accordance with these
gifts they are given a sufficiency of wealth. (For the way
marriages have their start in heaven, see no. 229
above.)
- 250. [Class differences]
- (15) There are also several reasons for
separation.- 251. [Reasons for separation]
251. (15) There are several reasons also for separation.
Separations can be separations from the bed or separations from
the house. Reasons for separations from the bed are many, likewise
for separations from the house. We concern ourselves here,
however, with legitimate ones.(Since reasons for separation coincide with grounds for taking
a mistress, to which we devote a chapter in the second part of
this work,[*1] the reader is therefore referred to that section to
see the grounds in their own sequential development.)Legitimate reasons for separation are as follows:
[*1] See “Taking a Mistress,” nos. 462ff.
- 251. [Reasons for separation]
- (16) Of these, the first is an impairment of
the mind.- 252. [Mental impairment]
252. (16) The first reason for legitimate separation is an
impairment of the mind. The reason for this is that married love
is a union of minds. If the mind of one grows apart from that of
the other, therefore, this union is broken, and love fades with
it. It can be seen what sort of impairments lead to separation
from an enumeration of them. They are, accordingly, in large part
the following:Psychosis. Organic psychosis. Insanity. Actual idiocy or
imbecility. Amnesia. Severe neurosis.Extreme simplemindedness so as to lack any perception of
goodness and truth. Utmost stubbornness in not complying with what
is just and fair.Taking the greatest pleasure in prattling and talking only
about inconsequential and trivial matters.Having an uncontrollable urge to divulge secrets of the home.
Having an uncontrollable urge to argue; to strike blows; to take
revenge; to act maliciously; to steal; to lie; to deceive; to
blaspheme.Neglect of the children. Intemperance. High living. Excessive
extravagance. Drunkenness. Lack of cleanliness. Shamelessness.
Resorting to sorceries and witchcraft. Impiety.Many other disorders could be listed as well.
By legitimate reasons here we do not mean judicial ones, but
ones legitimate to the other partner. Only rarely are separations
from the house decreed by a judge.
- 252. [Mental impairment]
- (17) A second is an impairment of the body.
- 253. [Physical impairment]
253. (17) A second reason for legitimate separation is an
impairment of the body. By impairments of the body we do not mean
incidental illnesses which befall one or the other partner during
their marriage and pass away. What we mean are persistent
conditions which do not pass away.Pathology tells us what these are. Being of many types and
kinds, some, for example, are diseases by which the whole body is
so thoroughly infected as to raise the possibility of death by
contagion. Conditions of this sort include: Malignant and
pestilential fevers. Leprosies. Venereal diseases. Gangrenous
infections. Cancerous sores. And other comparable conditions.Other afflictions are conditions by which the whole body
becomes so thoroughly burdened as to make close companionship
impossible, or which are accompanied by unhealthy exhalations and
noxious vapors, either from the body’s surface or from its inner
parts, particularly from the stomach and lungs.Conditions involving the surface of the body include: Malignant
lesions. Warts. Pustules. Scurvy-like discoloration and swelling
of the skin. Virulent scabies. (Especially if the face is
disfigured by these afflictions.)[2] Exhalations emanating from the stomach: Offensive,
foul-smelling, rank and crude eructations.Emanating from the lungs: Foul and rancid expirations, issuing
from tubercles, ulcerations and abscesses, or from the presence of
corrupted blood or corrupted lymphatic fluid collected there.In addition to these are also other conditions having various
names. For example: Chronic faintness, marked by complete physical
languor and loss of strength. Paralysis, which involves a
loosening or slackening of the membranes and ligaments required
for movement. Certain other chronic disorders arising from loss of
flexibility or elasticity in the sinews, or from excessive
thickness, viscosity or causticity of the body’s fluids. Epilepsy.
Permanent disability due to strokes or apoplexies. Certain
consumptive disorders which destroy the body. Intestinal
obstruction and suffering (ileus). Chronic stomach disorder and
diarrhea. Hernial protrusion. And other, comparable conditions.
- 253. [Physical impairment]
- (18) A third is impotence prior to marriage.
- 254. [Impotence prior to marriage]
254. (18) A third reason for legitimate separation is impotence
prior to marriage. This is reason for separation, because the goal
of marriage is the procreation of offspring, which the already
impotent cannot provide. Moreover, because they know this
beforehand, they deliberately deprive their partners of any hope
of children, a hope which nevertheless nourishes and sustains the
married love of women.
- 254. [Impotence prior to marriage]
- (19) Adultery is ground for divorce.
- 255. [Adultery is ground for divorce]
255. (19) Adultery is ground for divorce. There are many
explanations for this which appear in the light of reason and yet
today lie hidden. From the light of reason it may be seen that
marriages are sacred and adulterous affairs profane; consequently
that marriages and adulterous relationships are diametrically
opposed to each other; and that when opposite acts upon opposite,
one destroys the other even to the last spark of its life. This is
what happens with married love when a married man deliberately and
thus purposefully commits acts of adultery.These considerations come more clearly into the light of reason
in the case of people who know something about heaven and hell.
For they know that marriages have their origin in heaven and from
heaven, whereas adulterous relationships have their origin in hell
and from hell. Thus they know that the two cannot be combined, as
heaven cannot be combined with hell; and that if they are combined
in a person, immediately heaven withdraws and hell enters.[2] It is on account of this, then, that adultery is ground for
divorce. Therefore the Lord says:…whoever divorces his wife, excepting for licentiousness, and
marries another, commits adultery…. (Matthew 19:9)He says a person commits adultery if he divorces and marries
another “excepting for licentiousness,” because divorce
for this latter reason involves a full and complete separation of
minds, which is properly called divorce. But all other cases of
divorce on their own particular grounds are properly separations,
which we have already discussed just above. If after such
separations a person takes another wife, he commits adultery. Not,
however, after divorce.
- 255. [Adultery is ground for divorce]
- (20) Incidental reasons for coldness are
also many; and of these, the first is ordinariness from being
continually allowed.- 256. [ordinariness from being continually
allowed]256. (20) Incidental reasons for coldness are also many; and of
these, the first is ordinariness from being continually allowed.
Ordinariness from being continually allowed is an incidental
reason for coldness because it develops as an additional one in
people who think of marriage and of their wives in a lascivious
manner. Not, however, in those who think reverently of marriage
and protectively of their wives.The fact that ordinariness from being continually allowed may
cause even sources of enjoyment to become matters of indifference
and also then boredom – this is something that is apparent in the
case of plays and shows, musical concerts, dances, banquets, and
other like pleasures – pleasures which in themselves are treats,
because they are recreational.It is similar with the domestic relations and intimacies
between married partners. Especially is it the case between
partners who have not removed an unchaste love for the opposite
sex from their love for each other, and when in the absence of
ability they think nonsensically about its ordinariness from being
continually allowed. It is evident in itself that for them this
ordinariness is then reason for coldness. We call it an incidental
reason, because it arises in addition to their intrinsic coldness
as though it were the reason and lends support to it as an
explanation. To turn aside coldness arising on this account as
well, some wives are prompted by the prudence innate in them to
make the allowable seem not allowable by various shows of
resistance.It is altogether different, however, in the case of people who
judge chastely of their wives. So it is that among angels,
ordinariness from being continually allowed is the very delight of
their soul and the containing medium of their married love. For
they experience the delight of that love continually, and its
ultimate delights according as their minds are ready,
uninterrupted by cares, thus according to the prudent good
pleasure of the husbands.
- 256. [ordinariness from being continually
- (21) A second is the sense that living with
one’s partner is compelled by covenant and law and not free.- 257. [Forced cohabitation]
257. (21) Of these incidental reasons for coldness, a second is
the sense that living with one’s partner is compelled by covenant
and law and not free. This is reason for coldness only in the case
of people for whom married love is cold in their inmost parts; and
because it arises in addition to their internal coldness, it
becomes an added or incidental reason. In such people, love free
of marriage, because of its consent and favor, inwardly burns in a
state of heat (for the coldness of the one love means the warmth
of the other), and if the heat is not felt, still it is there,
even in the midst of coldness. If it were not present even then,
revival of interest would be impossible.This heat is what creates the sense of compulsion, and the
feeling increases in the measure that the other partner views the
covenant by right of contract and the law by right of justice as
bonds not to be violated. It is different if the bonds are broken
on both sides.[2] The contrary is the case with people who have renounced
love outside of marriage and think of married love as heavenly and
as being heaven; and still more with those who perceive this to be
so. In their case the covenant with its stipulations and the law
with its requirements are engraved on their hearts, and these
become continually more deeply engraved on them. To them the bond
of married love is not an obligation established because of the
written covenant or by the enacted law, but the very love they
feel has these two implanted in it from creation. The covenant and
law inherent in the love is the reason for the covenant and law
established in the world, not the reverse. Consequently everything
connected with that love is felt as free. There is no sense of
freedom that is not connected with love. I have heard moreover
from angels that the sense of freedom in true married love is the
freest of all, because that love is the greatest of loves.
- 257. [Forced cohabitation]
- (22) A third is declaration by the wife of
her love and discourse by her about it.- 258. [A smothering wife]
258. (22) Of these incidental reasons for coldness, a third is
declaration by the wife of her love and discourse by her about it.
Among angels in heaven husbands do not encounter refusal or
resistance on the part of their wives as happens in some cases on
earth. Among angels in heaven one also finds discourse by wives
about love and not the same silence that one finds in some cases
on earth. I am not permitted to present the reasons for these
differences, however, because it would not be appropriate for me
to do so. Nevertheless, they may be seen from the testimony of the
wives of angels who freely confide these reasons to their husbands
– testimony presented in four of the narrative accounts following
the chapters, by the three wives in the hall on which I saw what
seemed to be golden rain,[*1] and by the seven who were sitting in
a rose garden.[*2] I have included these accounts in order to
disclose everything connected with married love, which is the
subject we are considering here both in general and in particular.
- 258. [A smothering wife]
- (23) A fourth is the man’s thinking of his
wife day and night that she wants to, and conversely the wife’s
thinking of her husband that he does not want to.- 259. [Mixed expectations]
259. (23) Of these incidental reasons for coldness, a fourth is
the man’s thinking of his wife day and night that she wants to,
and conversely the wife’s thinking of her husband that he does not
want to. Except to observe that the first is a reason for coldness
in men, and that the second is a reason for love’s ceasing in
wives, we pass this by without discussion. For among the things
known to husbands who explore secrets relating to married love is
the fact that a man is chilled to the bone if, at the sight of his
wife by day or at her side by night, he thinks of her that she has
the desire or wants to, and conversely, that a wife loses her love
for her husband if she thinks of him that he is able and does not
want to.We include these observations as well in order to make this
work complete and not omit anything from our treatment of the
delights of wisdom relating to married love.
- 259. [Mixed expectations]
- (24) As coldness develops in the mind, so it
also develops in the body; and in the measure that this coldness
grows, the outward aspects of the body close up as well.- 260. [Emotional coldness causes physical
coldness]260. (24) As coldness develops in the mind, so it also develops
in the body; and in the measure that this coldness grows, the
outward aspects of the body close up as well. It is believed today
that a person’s mind is in his head and nothing of it in his body.
Yet both soul and mind are not only in the head but in the body;
for the soul and mind are the person, it being these two that
constitute the spirit which lives after death. (We have fully
shown in other works that this spirit exists in perfect human
form.) It is because of this that as soon as a person has a
thought, he can in an instant express it with the mouth of the
body and represent it simultaneously in gesture; and as soon as he
wills something, he can in an instant do it and accomplish it by
means of parts of the body. None of this would be possible if the
soul and mind were not at the same time in the body, constituting
the person’s spiritual self.This being the case, it can be seen that when married love
exists in the mind, there is a reflection of it in the body. Also,
that because love is a type of warmth, it descends from within and
opens the outer parts of the body. Conversely, however, it can be
seen that the absence of this love, which is coldness, descends
from within and closes up the outer parts of the body.This makes clearly apparent the reason ability lasts to
eternity in the case of angels, and the reason for its failure in
men in a state of coldness.
- 260. [Emotional coldness causes physical
- On people who are motivated by a love of
governing from love of self (nos. 261-266).-
- 261. [Spiritual polar region]
261. To this I will append three narrative accounts. Here is
the first:In the upper northern zone in the spiritual world, over to the
east, there are places of instruction, some for boys, some for
adolescents, some for men, and some also for older men. All who
have died as little children and are being raised in heaven are
sent to these places. So, too, are all those newly arrived from
the world who wish to learn about heaven and hell.This district is over to the east in order that they may all be
instructed by means of influx from the Lord. For the Lord is the
east, since He is there in the sun, which is pure love emanating
from Him. The warmth from that sun consequently in its essence is
love, and the light from it in its essence is wisdom. These two
are infused by the Lord into the people there from that sun, and
they are infused in accordance with their reception of them, which
in turn depends on their love of becoming wise.When their periods of instruction are over, those who have
become intelligent are sent out from there and are called
disciples of the Lord. They are sent first to the west, and if
they do not remain there, to the south, and some through the south
to the east. And so they are introduced into the societies where
their dwellings are to be.[2] Once, when I was thinking about heaven and hell, I began to
wish to have a universal concept of the state of each, knowing
that a person who is acquainted with the universals of a thing can
afterwards comprehend the particulars, since the particulars are
contained in the universals, like the parts in a whole.With this wish I looked in the direction of that district in
the northern zone over to the east, where the places of
instruction were; and going there by a way then opened to me, I
went into one of the colleges in which the students were young
men. There I approached the senior teachers who were doing the
instructing, and I asked them whether they knew any 3universal
characteristics relating to heaven and hell. They replied that
they knew a little something; “but,” they said, “if
we look eastward to the Lord, we will be enlightened and then we
will know.” They proceeded to do this, and then said:“The universal characteristics of [both heaven and] hell
are three, but the universal characteristics of hell are
diametrically opposite to the universal characteristics of heaven.
The universal characteristics of hell are the following three
loves: a love of governing stemming from a love of self; a love of
possessing the goods of others stemming from a love of the world;
and licentious love.“The universal characteristics of heaven opposite to these
are the following three loves: a love of governing stemming from a
love of being useful; a love of possessing the goods of the world
stemming from a love of performing useful services by means of
them; and true married love.”Their having said this, after wishing them peace, I departed
and returned home.When I got home, I was told from heaven, “Examine these
three universal characteristics, above and below, and afterwards
we will see them on your hand.” They said, “on your
hand,” because everything a person examines mentally appears
to angels as though written on his hands.
- 261. [Spiritual polar region]
-
- 262. [love of governing from a love of self]
262. After that I examined the first universal love of hell,
which was a love of governing stemming from a love of self, and
then the universal love of heaven corresponding to it, which was a
love of governing stemming from a love of accomplishing useful
ends. Indeed, I was not allowed to examine one love without the
other, because the intellect does not comprehend one without the
other, since they are opposites. In order to understand the two,
therefore, they must be set in contrast, one against the other.
For a beautiful and attractive face shines out by the contrast to
it of a homely and ugly one.When I considered the love of governing stemming from a love of
self, I was given to see that this love was supremely hellish, and
so is found among those who are in the deepest hell; and that the
love of governing from a love of accomplishing useful ends was
supremely heavenly, and so is found among those who are in the
highest heaven.[2] A love of governing from a love of self is supremely
hellish because to govern from a love of self is to govern from
self, and a person’s self from birth is the essence of evil, which
is diametrically opposed to the Lord. The further people progress
into this evil, therefore, the more they reject God and the
sanctities of the church, worshiping themselves and nature. Let
those who are caught up in this evil please examine it in
themselves, and they will see.This love is also such that the more it is given free rein
(which it is as long as some obstacle does not stand in the way),
the more it rushes from rung to rung until it reaches the highest
it can; nor does it stop 3there, but if no higher level is
possible, it grieves and laments. In politicians this love mounts
to the point that they wish to be kings and emperors, and if
possible, to rule over all the world and be called kings of kings
and emperors of emperors. The same love in clergymen, on the other
hand, mounts to the point that they wish to be gods, and as far as
possible, to rule over all of heaven and be called gods of gods.
(It will be seen in what follows here that neither of these kinds
of people acknowledge any god at heart.)In contrast, however, people who wish to govern from a love of
accomplishing useful ends – these do not wish to govern from self
but from the Lord, since a love of useful ends comes from the Lord
and is the Lord Himself [in them]. People like this look upon
positions of authority only as means to performing useful
services. They rank the useful services as far more important than
the positions, whereas the first people described rank the
positions as far more important than the useful services.
- 262. [love of governing from a love of self]
-
- 263. [An emperor from hell]
263. As I was pondering these matters, I was told by the Lord
through an angel, “Now you will see and be convinced by
visual demonstration what that hellish love is like.”And suddenly then the earth to my left opened up, and I saw a
devil ascending out of hell. He had on his head a square hat
pulled down over his forehead to his eyes, a face full of pustules
as though from a burning fever, savage eyes, and a chest swollen
up into a drum. From his mouth he belched smoke like a furnace;
his loins were completely on fire; instead of feet he had only
bony ankles without any flesh; and from his body emanated a foul
and unclean heat.[2] On seeing him I was terrified, and I cried out to him,
“Don’t come any closer! Just say where you have come from.”So he replied, hoarsely, “I come from below, and I live
there with two hundred others in a society which is the most
preeminent society of all. We are all emperors of emperors, kings
of kings, dukes of dukes, and princes of princes there. No one
among us is merely an ordinary emperor, or an ordinary king, duke
or prince. We sit there on our thrones of thrones, and send out
decrees to all the world and beyond.”I then said to him, “Do you not see that your delusion of
preeminence has made you insane?”But he replied, “How can you say that, seeing that we all
appear to ourselves completely as I have described, and are
acknowledged as such by our colleagues?”Hearing this, I did not want to say, “You are insane,”
again, because he really was insane as a result of his delusion.It was then granted me to learn that when this devil lived in
the world, he had been only the caretaker of someone else’s house,
and that even then he had been so carried away in spirit that he
looked down on all the rest of the human race in comparison with
himself, indulging in the fantasy that he was worthier than any
king, even worthier than any emperor. Because of this conceit, he
had rejected God, regarding all the sanctities of the church as of
no value to him but only something for the stupid masses.[3] Finally I asked him, “The two hundred in your society
– how long will you go on vaunting yourselves like that with each
other?”“To eternity,” he said. But he added, “Those of
us who do injury to others for denying our preeminence, sink down.
For we are allowed to vaunt ourselves to each other, but we may
not inflict harm on anyone.”I inquired further, “Do you know what the fate is for
those who sink down?”He said that they sink down into a certain prison, where they
are called lower than the low or the very lowest and are made to
labor.I then said to that devil, “You had better take care,
therefore, lest you too sink down.”
- 263. [An emperor from hell]
-
- 264. [A god from hell]
264. After this the earth opened again, but this time to my
right, and I saw another devil rising up. On his head he had a
kind of miter, wrapped around with what seemed like the coils of a
snake, with its head sticking up from the peak. His face was
leprous, from forehead to chin, and so were both his hands. His
loins were bare and black as soot, with fire glowing darkly
through the blackness, as though from a hearth. And the ankles of
his feet looked like a pair of vipers.Seeing him, the first devil fell on his knees and worshiped
him. When I asked him why he did that, he said, “Because he
is God of heaven and earth and is almighty.”So then I asked the second devil, “What do you say to
that?”He replied, “What can I say? I have all power over heaven
and hell. The fate of every soul is in my hand.”So I asked the same devil again, “How can he, who is
emperor of emperors, submit himself in this way, and how can you
accept his adoration?”He answered, “He is still my servant. What is an emperor
before God? I hold in my right hand the thunderbolt of
excommunicating.”[2] At that point I then said to him, “How can you be so
insane? In the world you were only an ordinary member of a
religious order; but because you labored under the delusion that
you, too, had the keys and thus the power of binding and
loosing,[*1] you have incited your spirit to such a degree of
madness that you now believe you are God Himself!”Angered at this, he swore that he was God, and said that the
Lord did not have any power in heaven – “because,” he
said, “He transferred it all to us.[*2] We have only to
command, and heaven and hell reverently obey. If we send anyone to
hell, the devils immediately accept him. The angels likewise
accept anyone we send to heaven.”I inquired further, “How many of you are there in your
society?”“Three hundred,” he said, “and we are all gods
there, but I am god of gods.”[3] After that the earth opened under the feet of the two
devils, and they sank down into the depths to their hells. And I
was granted to see that beneath their hells were workhouses, into
which those would fall who inflict injuries on others. For
everyone in hell is permitted to keep his delusion and even his
exulting in it, but he may not do harm to anyone else. (People in
hell are the way they are because every person is then in his
spirit, and after the spirit is separated from the body, it comes
into full freedom to behave in accordance with its affections and
consequent thoughts.)[4] It was granted me next to look into the hells of the two
devils, and the hell where the emperors of emperors and kings of
kings were was full of every sort of filth. They themselves looked
like various species of wild animals with fiercely savage eyes. I
likewise looked into the other hell, where the gods and the god of
gods were, and in that I saw frightful birds of the night flitting
about them – birds which are called ochim[*3] and iyyim.[*4] That
is how the fantasies of their delusion appeared to me.It was apparent from this experience what a politically
oriented love of self is like, and what a church-oriented love of
self is like. The first is such that its possessors want to be
emperors, while the second is such that its possessors want to be
gods. Moreover, this is what they wish to be and also aspire to be
to the extent these loves are given free rein.[*1] Based on Matthew 16:13-19, Roman Catholics claim for the
Pope the keys of heaven and the power of “binding and
loosing,” giving him and his proper delegates (cf. Matthew
18:18) all authority over the church and even over heaven.[*2] Based, again, on Matthew 16:18,19; 18:18.
[*3] A Hebrew word (Oyi”), appearing only once in the Old
Testament (Isaiah 13:21). It seems to refer to howling or
screeching creatures, perhaps screech owls (cf. no. 233:7),
but the actual identity is unknown. It may not be a precise term.[*4] Another Hebrew word (Oyii), appearing only three times in
the Old Testament (Isaiah 13:22, 34:14; Jeremiah 50:39). Again,
the term seems to refer to howling or screeching creatures,
perhaps bats (cf. no. 233:7), but the actual
identity is unknown. It, too, may not be a precise term.
- 264. [A god from hell]
-
- 265. [Two popes in hell]
265. Another hell was subsequently opened where I saw two men.
One was sitting on a bench, with his feet in a basket full of
snakes, and as I looked they were slithering up over his breast to
his neck. The other man was sitting on a donkey on fire, and at
each side of it crept serpents that were red in color, lifting
their necks and heads and following the rider.I was told that the two had been popes who had deposed emperors
from power and had treated them with vituperation and abuse when
these came supplicating them and venerating them at Rome. The
basket in which I saw the snakes, and the donkey on fire with the
serpents on each side, were representations of their love of
governing from a love of self. However, that is not how they
appear to others unless they view them from a distance.Some members of a religious order were present, and I asked
them whether the men were those same popes. They said they
recognized them and knew that they were.
- 265. [Two popes in hell]
- 266. [Angels who govern]
266. After witnessing these sad and terrible scenes, I looked
around and saw two angels standing and talking not far from me.
One was dressed in a dazzling woolen gown of blazing purple, with
a tunic of glistening silk underneath. The other was similarly
dressed, in clothing of scarlet, with a miter in which some
garnets had been set on the right side.Going over to them, I welcomed them and respectfully asked,
“Why are you here below?”Answering they replied, “We have been sent here from
heaven by the Lord’s command, to speak with you about the blessed
lot of people who want to govern from a love of accomplishing
useful ends. We are worshipers of the Lord. I am the prince of a
society; this other is the high priest there.”The prince then said that he was a servant of his society,
because he served it by rendering useful services. And the other
said he was an attendant of the church there, because to serve the
people he attended to its sanctities for the service of their
souls. [2] Moreover, they said they both experienced continual
joys from an eternal happiness which they had in them from the
Lord; and that everything in their society was splendid and
magnificent – splendid on account of its gold and precious stones,
and magnificent on account of its palaces and paradise-like parks.“The reason for this,” they said, “is that our
love of governing does not arise from a love of self, but from a
love of accomplishing useful ends; and because a love of
accomplishing useful ends comes from the Lord, therefore all good
and useful things in heaven are splendid and radiant.“In our society we are all possessed of this love, and
therefore its atmosphere appears golden, from the light which it
draws there from the blaze of the sun – for the blaze of the sun
corresponds to that love.”[3] When they said this, I saw as well a similar atmosphere
appearing about them, and I sensed a fragrance emanating from it,
which I also mentioned to them. And I asked them to add something
further to what they had said about a love of being useful.So they continued, saying, “The positions we hold are
positions we admittedly sought, but for no other purpose than to
be able to perform useful services more fully and to extend them
more widely. We are also surrounded with honor, and we accept it,
yet not for our own sake, but for the good of the society. For our
comrades and friends among the common people there scarcely know
otherwise than that the honors of our positions are lodged in us,
and consequently that the services we render come from ourselves.
We, however, feel differently. We feel that the honors of our
positions are outside us, and are like garments with which we are
clothed, while the services we render come from a love of them
within us from the Lord. This love, moreover, gains its bliss from
its communication through useful service with others. We know,
too, from experience, that the more we perform useful services
from a love of them, the more this love increases, and with it the
wisdom on which the communication depends. But the more we keep
these services to ourselves and do not communicate them, the more
the bliss dies away; and when this happens, useful service becomes
like food retained in the belly, which is not distributed so as to
nourish the body and its parts, but remains undigested and so
produces nausea.“The whole of heaven, in short, is nothing but a world of
useful service, from the firsts to the lasts of it. What is useful
service but love of the neighbor in act? And what holds the
heavens together except this love?”[4] Having listened to this, I inquired, “How can anyone
know whether he performs useful services from a love of self or
whether he does so from a love of accomplishing useful ends?
Everyone, be he good or evil, performs some useful services, and
he is prompted to do them because of some love. Suppose that there
were in the world a society composed only of devils, and another
society composed only of angels. Moved by the fire of their love
of self and the splendor of their own glory, the devils would
perform, I think, as many useful services in their society as the
angels would in theirs. Who can know, therefore, from what love
and from what origin these services flow?”[5] To this the two angels replied, “Devils perform useful
services for the sake of themselves and their reputation, in order
to be promoted to positions of honor or gain wealth. Angels, on
the other hand, do not perform useful services on that account,
but for the sake of the services, from a love of them. A person
cannot distinguish the one and the other kinds of service, but the
Lord sees the difference. Everyone who believes in the Lord and
refrains from evils as sins performs useful services from the
Lord. But everyone who does not believe in the Lord and does not
refrain from evils as sins performs the services he does from
himself and for the sake of himself.“That is the difference between services performed by
devils and services performed by angels.”Having said this, the two angels departed. And watching from a
distance, I saw them apparently carried off in a chariot of fire
like Elijah and so taken up to their heaven.
-
- On people who are motivated by a love of
possessing all the goods of the world (nos. 267,
268).-
- 267. [Craving for possessions]
267. The second account:
Some period of time later I entered a wooded area, where I
walked engaged in thought concerning people who are caught up in a
craving to possess those things which have to do with the world,
and who fantasize on that account that they do. And I saw, then,
two angels at some distance from me, talking together and now and
then looking over at me. Consequently I drew nearer; and as I
approached, they spoke to me, saying:“We perceive in ourselves that you are thinking about the
same thing we are discussing, or that we are discussing the same
thing you are thinking about, which comes from a reciprocal
communication of our affections.”I asked them, therefore, what they were discussing.
“Fantasy, lust, and intelligence,” they said, “and
at the moment, people who find delight in picturing and imagining
that they possess everything in the world.”[2] At that I then asked them to express their thought with
respect to the first three points – lust, fantasy and
intelligence.So, taking up the subject, they said that everyone is in a
state of lust inwardly from birth, and in a state of intelligence
outwardly from training; but that no one is in a state of
intelligence inwardly, thus in spirit – still less in a state of
wisdom – except from the Lord.“For everyone,” they said, “is withheld from the
lust of evil and kept in a state of intelligence according as he
looks to the Lord and is at the same time conjoined with Him.
Apart from this a person is nothing but lust. Yet he is still in a
state of intelligence in outward aspects, or as regards the body,
from training. For though a person craves honors and riches, or
prominence and wealth, these two are not attained unless he
appears to be moral and spiritual in character, thus intelligent
and wise; and he learns to appear such from the time he is a
little child. That is why, as soon as he comes into the company of
others or into gatherings of them, he turns his spirit about,
withdraws it from lust, and speaks and acts in accordance with the
becoming and honorable virtues he has learned from early childhood
and still retains in his physical memory – doing his utmost to
take care that nothing emerges of the insanity of lust which grips
his spirit.[3] “Consequently everyone not inwardly led by the Lord is
a faker, a phony and a hypocrite, and so is human in appearance
but not in reality. Of such a person it may be said that his outer
shell or body is wise, while his kernel or spirit is insane; or
that his outward aspect is human and his inward one animal. People
like that direct the back of their heads upward and the front
downward, thus going about as though afflicted with heaviness,
their heads hanging down and their faces turned to the ground.
When they put off the body and become spirits, and are then set
free, they become reflections of the insanities of their lust. For
people who are caught up in love of self have a longing to rule
over the universe, even to extend its limits in order to widen
their dominion, never seeing an end; while people who are caught
up in a love of the world have a longing to possess all its
riches, and they grieve and are envious if any of its treasures
are kept hidden from them in the possession of others.“To keep people like this from becoming nothing but
reflections of their lusts, therefore, and so no longer human, it
is given them in the natural[*1] world to think in accord with
fear for the loss of their reputation, and so the loss of honor
and gain, together with fear of the law and its penalties; and
also to apply their minds to some pursuit or work, by which they
are held in external concerns and thus in a state of intelligence,
however irrational and insane they are inwardly.”[4] Following this description I asked whether all people who
are caught up in the lust are at the same time caught up in the
fantasy of it.They replied that those are caught up in the fantasy of their
lust who think withdrawn into themselves and indulge their
imagination excessively, talking to themselves; for they almost
separate their spirit from its connection with the body,
overwhelming their understanding with delusion and stupidly
entertaining themselves with nonsense as though everything in the
universe were theirs.This madness is what a person comes into after death if he has
withdrawn his spirit from the body and has been unwilling to
relinquish the pleasure of his madness, thinking little from
religion about evils and falsities, and least of all about
unbridled love of self as being destructive of love toward the
Lord, or about unbridled love of the world as being destructive of
love for the neighbor.[*1] The original text reads, “in the spiritual world,”
but preceding and subsequent statements in the discussion, and the
general doctrine delivered elsewhere concerning the nature of the
two worlds, suggest that it is probably a slip of the pen for “the
natural world.” (The same statement is repeated in True
Christian Religion, no. 662:3, without
correction, but so are several other, more obvious errors,
indicating that the latter was simply set in type again from the
text here, without careful review.)
- 267. [Craving for possessions]
- 268. [Hoarding gold]
268. After that the two angels were affected with a desire, as
was I, to see some of those people who from a love of the world
are caught up in a delusionary lust or fantasy that they possess
all riches. And we perceived that this desire was inspired in us
in order that we might learn something about them.Their abodes lay beneath the ground under our feet, but above
hell. Consequently we looked at each other and said, “Let’s
go.” Seeing then an opening with a stairway in it, we
descended by it; and we were told to approach them from the east,
in order not to enter into the mist of their fantasy, which would
cloud our understanding and with it our vision.[2] Suddenly, then, we saw a house built of reeds, being thus
full of cracks, standing in a cloud of mist, which continually
poured out like smoke through the crevices in three of the walls.
Going in, we saw a group of fifty people on one side and fifty on
another, sitting on benches, with their backs to the east and
south so that they faced toward the west and north. Each had a
table in front of him, and on the table some bulging moneybags,
surrounded by a quantity of gold coins.We inquired, “Is that the wealth of all the inhabitants of
the world?”To which they replied, “Not of all the inhabitants of the
world, but of all the inhabitants in our kingdom.”Their speech had a hissing sound; and they themselves had what
appeared to be roundish faces, which glistened like snail shells.
The pupils of their eyes also seemed to glitter in fields of
green, an effect arising from the light of their fantasy.Standing now in the midst of them, we said, “You believe,
then, that you possess all the wealth in your kingdom.”“Yes,” they said, “we do.”
“Which of you does?” we asked then.
“Each of us,” they said.
So we asked, “How can each of you possess it when there
are so many of you?”They replied, “We each know that all that is his is mine,
nor is anyone permitted to think, still less say, “What is
mine is not yours.” However, we may think and say, “What
is yours is mine.””The coins on the tables looked as though they were made
entirely of gold, even to us. But when we let in some light from
the east, they turned out to be specks of gold which the people
had magnified into coins by a united effort of their common
fantasy. They said that everyone who entered had to bring with him
some gold, which they would cut into bits, and the bits into
specks; and by the combined force of their fantasy they would then
enlarge these into grander-looking coins.[3] At that we then said, “Were you not born human beings
capable of reason? What is the reason for this delusionary
foolishness of yours?”“We know it is only imaginary nonsense,” they said,
“but because it pleases the inner longings of our minds, we
come in here and entertain ourselves with thinking as though
everything were ours. We do not stay here, however, more than a
few hours. After that we leave, and every time we do our minds
recover their sanity. Nevertheless, from time to time our
delusionary pleasure overcomes us, causing us periodically to
return, and periodically to leave. Thus we are sometimes wise and
sometimes mad.“Besides, we know that a hard fate awaits those who
craftily steal the property of others.”“What fate is that?” we asked.
“They are swallowed up,” they said, “and thrust
naked into some prison in hell, where they are made to toil for
food and clothing, and afterwards for a few pennies. They
accumulate these pennies and set their heart’s delight in them.
But if they do any mischief to their companions, they have to give
them part of their pennies as a fine.”
-
- “Lucifer” (no. 269).
- 269. [Lucifer]
269. We subsequently ascended from this underworld in a
southerly direction to where we had been before; and there the
angels recounted a number of other things worth mentioning,
concerning lust that is not delusionary or given to fantasy – the
kind everyone is possessed of from birth. Whenever people are
caught up in this lust, they said, they are as fools, and yet
appear to themselves as extremely wise. But they are by turns
brought back from this foolish state into a rational one, which in
them resides in their outward faculties; and in that state they
see, recognize and acknowledge their insanity.“But still,” the angels continued, “they long to
go from their rational state into their irrational one, and they
also let themselves go into it, as from a compelled and unpleasant
condition into a free and pleasant one. Thus it is lust that
pleasures them inwardly, and not intelligence.[2] “Every human being is from creation a combination of
three universal loves: love of the neighbor, which is also a love
of performing useful services; love of the world, which is also a
love of possessing riches; and love of self, which is also a love
of exercising command over others.“Love of the neighbor, or a love of performing useful
services, is a love of the spirit. Love of the world, on the other
hand, or a love of possessing riches, is a love of material
things. And love of self, or a love of exercising command over
others, is a love of one’s own person.[3] “A person is a human being as long as love of the
neighbor or a love of performing useful services forms the head,
with love of the world forming the body, and love of self forming
the feet. But if love of the world forms the head, a person is not
a human being except in a kind of hunchbacked way. And when love
of self forms the head, he is no longer a human being standing on
his feet, but one standing on his hands with his head down and
bottom up.“When love of the neighbor forms the head, and the other
two loves form respectively the body and feet, the person appears,
when viewed from heaven, to have an angelic face, with a beautiful
rainbow-like halo about his head. But if love of the world forms
the head, he appears when viewed from heaven to have a pallid
face, like that of a dead man, with a yellow circle about his
head. And if love of self forms the head, he appears from heaven
to have a dark face, with a white circle about his head.”At that point I asked what the circles around the heads
represented.“They represent intelligence,” they replied. “A
white circle around a head with a dark face represents that the
person’s intelligence lies in his outward faculties or round about
him, while insanity resides in his inward faculties or within him.
Even a person like that is wise so long as he is in a state of the
body, but when he is in a state of the spirit he is insane. No one
is ever wise in spirit except from the Lord, which comes about
when he is being born again or created anew by Him.”[4] Following these words, the ground to my left opened, and
through the opening I saw a devil rising, having a luminous white
circle about his head. I asked him therefore, “Who are you?”“I am Lucifer,” he answered, “son of the dawn.
And because I made myself like the Most High, I was cast
down.”[*1]In fact he was not really Lucifer, but he thought he was. So I
asked him, “Seeing that you were cast down, how is it that
are you able to rise again from hell?”To which he replied, “In hell I am a devil, but here I am
an angel of light. Do you not see the ring of light encircling my
head? And if you wish, you will see, too, that with moral people I
am more than moral; with rational people, more than rational;
indeed, with spiritual people, more than spiritual. I can even
preach, and moreover have preached.”“What have you preached?” I asked.
“I have preached,” he said, “against swindlers,
against adulterers, and against infernal loves of every kind.
Indeed, at such times I have called myself – Lucifer – a devil,
and have uttered falsehoods against myself as such; and for that I
have been praised to the sky. That is why I have been called son
of the dawn. Moreover – what has surprised me – whenever I was in
the pulpit, I had no other thought than to speak uprightly and
fittingly. However, I discovered in myself the reason, which is
that I was caught up in external states, and these were then
separate from my inward ones. Yet, having discovered this in
myself, still I could not change, because my arrogance prevented
me from having regard for God.”[5] I then inquired, “How were you able to speak as you
did, seeing that you are a swindler, adulterer, and devil
yourself?”He replied, “I am one sort of person when I am in external
states or a state of the body, and another when I am in internal
states or a state of the spirit. In a state of the body I am an
angel, but in a state of the spirit a devil. For in a state of the
body I am directed by my understanding, but in a state of the
spirit by my will; and my understanding carries me upward, while
my will carries me down. Furthermore, when I am directed by my
understanding, a band of white encompasses my head; however, as
soon as my understanding surrenders itself completely to my will
and becomes its servant – which is our ultimate fate – then the
band turns black and disappears. When that happens, we can no
longer ascend into this light.”The devil afterwards talked about his dual states, one
external, one internal, and he spoke of them more rationally than
anybody else has. But suddenly, when he noticed the angels with
me, he became inflamed in face and voice and turned black,
including even the band about his head; and he sank back down to
hell through the opening through which he had risen.There were some people standing by who witnessed these events,
and they drew from them the following conclusion, that a person’s
character is shaped by his will, and not by his intellect, since
love easily carries away the understanding into seeing things its
way and becoming its servant.[6] I then asked the angels, “How is it possible for
devils to have such rationality?”And they said, “It comes from the glory of self-love; for
love of self is wrapped in glory, and glory raises the
understanding even into the light of heaven. Indeed, in every
person the understanding is capable of being raised in accordance
with his knowledge, in contrast to the will, which can be raised
only by living in accordance with the truths of the church and of
reason. That is why even atheists who from love of self are
motivated by the glory of their reputation and by a resulting
conceit in their own intelligence, may possess a higher degree of
rationality than many others – but only when they are directed by
the thought of their intellect, and not by the affection of their
will. For the affection of the will governs a person’s inner self,
while the thought of the intellect governs his outer one.”One of the angels further explained why human beings are a
combination of the three loves referred to previously, namely, a
love of being useful, a love of the world, and a love of self. The
reason, he said, is to enable a person to think in accord with
God, yet do so as though on his own. The highest elements in a
person are directed upwards to God, the intermediate elements
outwards to the world, and the lowest ones downwards to self. And
because these last elements are directed downwards, a person
thinks as though on his own, when in fact he does so from God.[*1] See Isaiah 14:12-15. The reference is a metaphor for the
king of Babylon (Isaiah 14:3,4), but based on an erroneous
connection with Luke 10:18 (cf. also Revelation 9:1, 12:7-10),
since the 3rd century it has been applied to Satan, a mythical
rebel angel cast down from heaven. Modern interpreters generally
understand the reference as an allusion to the planet Venus,
translating it usually as “day star” or “morning
star.”
- 269. [Lucifer]
- On coldness in marriage (no. 270).
- 270. [A palace in heaven]
270. The third account:
Awakening one morning, I fell to thinking about some questions
having to do with married love, coming finally to this one:In what region of the human mind is true married love seated,
and in what region, therefore, coldness in marriage?I knew that the human mind is divided into three regions, one
above the other, and that natural love resides in the lowest
region, spiritual love in the next higher one, and celestial love
in the highest. I knew also that in each region there is a
marriage of good and truth, and because good has to do with love,
and truth with wisdom, that in each region there is a marriage of
love and wisdom; moreover, that this marriage is the same as a
marriage of the will and understanding, since the will is the
recipient vessel of love, and the understanding the recipient
vessel of wisdom.[2] While I was deep in thought on this question, I suddenly
saw two swans flying towards the north, and presently two birds of
paradise flying towards the south, and then two turtledoves flying
in the east. Following their flight with my eyes, I next saw the
two swans veer their course from the north to the east, likewise
the two birds of paradise from the south, until they met up with
the pair of turtledoves in the east. Then together they flew
towards a certain lofty palace there, rising in the midst of olive
trees, palms and beeches. The palace had three rows of windows,
one above another; and as I watched, I saw the birds fly into the
palace – the swans through windows standing open in the lowest
row, the birds of paradise through windows open in the middle row,
and the turtledoves through windows open in the highest row.[3] After I witnessed this event, an angel stood beside me and
said, “Do you understand the things you have seen?”“A little,” I replied.
“The palace,” said the angel, “represents the
abodes of married love as these exist in human minds. Its highest
level – into which the turtledoves disappeared – represents the
highest region of the mind, where married love resides in the
goodness of love together with its wisdom. The middle level – into
which the birds of paradise disappeared – represents the
intermediate region, where married love resides in a love of truth
together with its intelligence. And the lowest level – into which
the swans disappeared – represents the lowest region of the mind,
where married love resides in a love of what is just and right
together with its knowledge.[4] “These degrees are also symbolized by the three pairs
of birds – the two turtledoves symbolizing married love in the
highest region, the two birds of paradise married love in the
intermediate region, and the two swans married love in the lowest
region. The three kinds of trees surrounding the palace – the
olive trees, palms and beeches – symbolize the same.“In heaven we call the highest region of the mind
celestial, the intermediate one spiritual, and the lowest one
natural. And we conceive of them as being like apartments in a
house, one above another, with steps going up from one to the
next, like stairs. Moreover, on each level there are as it were
two sets of rooms, one for love, one for wisdom, with a bedroom,
so to speak, in front, where they come together in bed – love with
its wisdom, or good with its truth, or to say the same thing, the
will with its intellect. In such a palace, all the mysteries of
married love become visible as though in effigy.”[5] Hearing this, being fired with a desire to see one, I asked
whether a person might go in and look at the palace there, since
it was a representational one.The angel replied that only angels in the third heaven could,
because for them every representation of love and wisdom becomes
real.“What I have related to you I have heard from them,”
he said, “including as well the following, that true married
love resides in the highest region, in the midst of mutual love in
the chamber or apartment of the will, and at the same time in the
midst of perceptions of wisdom in the chamber or apartment of the
intellect; and these come together in bed in a bedroom that is
located in front on the east side.”“Why,” I asked, “are there two chambers?”
“Because,” he said, “a husband lives in the
chamber of the intellect, and a wife lives in the chamber of the
will.”[6] At that I inquired, “If that is where married love
resides, where then does coldness in marriage reside?”“It, too, resides in the highest region,” he replied,
“but only in the chamber of the intellect, with the chamber
of the will on that level being closed off. For as often as it
pleases, the understanding with its truths can ascend by a spiral
stairway to its chamber in the highest region; but if the will
with the goodness of its love does not ascend at the same time to
its companion chamber, the latter remains closed, and coldness
develops in the other, which is the coldness one finds in
marriage.“As long as such coldness to one’s wife continues, the
intellect looks down from the highest region to the lowest; and if
fear does not hold it back, it also descends in order to warm
itself there with an illicit fire.”Having said this, the angel wished to tell me still more about
married love from the depictions of it in that palace; but he
said, “Enough for now. First investigate whether these
concepts are beyond people’s general comprehension. If they are,
what is the use of saying more? On the other hand, if they are
not, more will be disclosed another time.”[*1][*1] We find, however, no report of any further disclosures.
- 270. [A palace in heaven]
-
- 271. REASONS IN MARRIAGE FOR APPARENT LOVE,
FRIENDSHIP AND FAVOR-
- 271. [APPARENT LOVE, FRIENDSHIP AND FAVOR]
Now that we have considered reasons for cold states and
separations, it follows in succession that we consider also reasons
in marriage for apparent love, friendship and favor. For although
states of coldness separate the minds of married partners in the
world today, we know that they continue to live together and beget
children. This would not be the case if there were not states of
apparent love as well, which at times simulate or imitate the
warmth of genuine love. We will see in the following discussions
that these appearances are necessary and useful – that without them
homes would not hold together, and so neither would organized
societies.In addition to this, some conscientious persons may labor under
the idea that disagreements of minds and resulting internal
estrangements between them and their partner are attributable to
some fault in themselves, so that they are to blame, on which
account they grieve in heart. But because internal differences are
not in their hands to remedy, it is enough for them to assuage
distresses arising from conscience by shows of apparent love and
favor. Friendship may even return as a result, which carries within
it married love on the part of the one, if not on the part of the
other.However, because this subject includes a number of different
points to be considered, we will divide our treatment into sections
as before. Their headings are as follows:(1) Nearly all people in the natural world can be associated
together in respect to their outward affections, but not in respect
to their inner ones if these differ and become apparent.(2) In the spiritual world, all are associated together in
accord with their inner affections, and not in accord with their
outward affections unless these are in harmony with their inner
ones.(3) Marriages in the world are generally contracted on the basis
of outward affections.(4) If inward affections are not present to join the partners’
minds, however, the marriages come apart in the home.(5) Nevertheless, marriages in the world are to continue to the
end of one or the other’s life.(6) In marriages in which inward affections do not join the
partners, outward affections may exist which simulate inward ones
and keep the two together.(7) The result is apparent love, or apparent friendship and
favor, between the partners.(8) These appearances are simulations of married love, which are
commendable because they are useful and necessary.(9) In a spiritual person joined to a natural one, these
simulations of married love are a matter of justice and judgment.(10) In natural people, these simulations of married love are a
matter of prudence for various reasons.(11) They are adopted as means of amendment and as means of
accommodation.(12) They are adopted to preserve order in the couple’s domestic
affairs and to maintain their assistance to each other.(13) They are adopted because of their shared involvement in the
care of infants and concern for their children.(14) They are adopted for the sake of peace in the home.
(15) They are adopted for the sake of their reputation outside
the home.(16) They are adopted for the sake of various benefits expected
from the partner or from the partner’s relatives, and thus because
of a fear of losing them.(17) They are adopted in order to have one’s flaws excused, and
thus to avoid disgrace.(18) They are adopted as means of reconciliation.
(19) If favor does not cease on the wife’s part when ability
ceases in the man, a friendship resembling a married one may
develop as they grow older.(20) Various types of apparent love and friendship are possible
between partners in cases where one has been subjugated and is thus
subservient to the other.(21) There are hellish marriages in the world in which the
partners are inwardly bitter enemies and yet outwardly seem like
the closest of friends.Explanation of these statements now follows.
- 271. [APPARENT LOVE, FRIENDSHIP AND FAVOR]
- (1) Nearly all people in the natural world
can be associated together in respect to their outward affections,
but not in respect to their inner ones if these differ and become
apparent.- 272. [Outward affections can associate people
in the natural world]272. (1) Nearly all people in the natural world can be
associated together in respect to their outward affections, but
not in respect to their inner affections if these differ and
become apparent. The reason is that in the world a person is
invested with a material body, and this is filled with urges,
which in it are like dregs that settle to the bottom when newly
fermented wine is being clarified. From such elements come the
materials of which the bodies of people in the world are composed.
As a result, inward affections that belong to the mind do not
appear, and in many cases scarcely a trace of them is visible. For
either the body swallows them up and immerses them in its dregs,
or from a habit of dissembling learned from early childhood, it
hides them deep within and conceals them from the sight of others.
This also enables it to enter into the state of some affection
which it observes in someone else, and to attract the other’s
affection to it, so that they form a relationship. They form a
relationship, because every affection has its delight, and
delights are what join hearts together.It would be different, however, if inward affections were like
outward ones, visible in the expression of the face and gesture
and audible in the sound of the speech, or if their delights were
noticeable to the nose and smelled, as is the case in the
spiritual world. If these affections were then dissimilar to the
point of friction and conflict, they would separate their hearts
from each other and part, removing themselves to a distance
commensurate with their perception of antipathy.It is apparent from this that nearly all people in the natural
world can be associated together in respect to outward affections,
but not in respect to their inner affections, if these differ and
become apparent.
- 272. [Outward affections can associate people
- (2) In the spiritual world, all are
associated together in accord with their inner affections, and not
in accord with their outward affections unless these are in harmony
with their inner ones.- 273. [Inner affections associate people in
the spiritual world]273. (2) In the spiritual world, all are associated together in
accord with their inner affections, and not in accord with their
outward affections unless these are in harmony with their inner
ones. That is because they have then cast off the material body,
which was able to assume and exhibit the features of all sorts of
affections, as we said just above. And when a person is divested
of that body, he is in a state of his inner affections, which his
body previously concealed. With respect to similarities and
dissimilarities of character or congenial and uncongenial feelings
in the spiritual world, therefore, these are not only sensed
there, but they also appear in their faces, words and gestures.
Consequently people of like character in that world are associated
together, and people of unlike character are apart. (It is because
of this that the whole of heaven has been organized by the Lord in
accordance with all varieties of affections having to do with a
love of goodness and truth, and in opposition to it the whole of
hell in accordance with all varieties of affections having to do
with a love of evil and falsity.)[2] Since angels and spirits have inner and outer affections
just as people in the world do, and since their inner affections
cannot be hidden there by outward ones, so that the inner
affections show through and make themselves evident, therefore the
two sets of affections in them are brought into likeness and
correspondence; and after that their inner affections are
reflected through their outer ones, being imaged in their faces,
perceived in the sounds of their speech, and also visible in the
gestures of their comportment. (Angels and spirits have inner and
outer affections, too, because they have a mind and a body, and
their affections and consequent thoughts are matters of the mind,
while their sensations and consequent pleasures are matters of the
body.)[3] It frequently happens in the spiritual world that friends
meet after death and remember their friendship in the previous
world; and they then believe they will continue to share a life of
friendship as before. But when their comradeship is perceived in
heaven as being one based only on outward affections, a separation
is effected in accordance with their inner affections. Then, from
that place of meeting, some are sent away to the north, and some
to the west, each of them being at some distance from the other,
so that they never see each other again or recognize each other;
for in the places where they stay, their faces change to become
images of their inner affections.It is apparent from this that in the spiritual world, all are
associated together in accord with their inner affections, and not
in accord with their outer affections, unless these are in harmony
with their inner ones.
- 273. [Inner affections associate people in
- (3) Marriages in the world are generally
contracted on the basis of outward affections.- 274. [Marriages based on outward affections]
274. (3) Marriages in the world are generally contracted on the
basis of outward affections. This is because inward affections are
rarely considered; and even if they are, still a reflection of
them is not seen in the woman, for by native instinct she
withdraws her inner affections into the secret chambers of her
mind.There are many outward affections which induce men into
marrying. A primary affection in today’s world is enlargement of
the family fortune by wealth, either to become rich or to have the
means. Another is aspiration to positions of honor, either to be
held in high regard, or to enjoy an increased state of prosperity.Added to these are various enticements and lusts. These, too,
do not allow opportunity for exploring congruences of inward
affections.From these few observations it is apparent that marriages in
the world are generally contracted on the basis of outward
affections.
- 274. [Marriages based on outward affections]
- (4) If inward affections are not present to
join the partners’ minds, however, the marriages come apart in the
home.- 275. [Inward affections hold marriages
together]275. (4) If inward affections that join the partners’ minds are
not present, however, the marriages come apart in the home. We
say, in the home, because it takes place in private between them.
It happens with the disappearance of their initial feelings of
warmth, ignited at the time of their engagement and burning at the
approach of their wedding, as these afterwards gradually die down
because of the difference in their inward affections and finally
vanish into states of coldness. People know that the outward
affections which once induced and enticed them into marrying are
then cast aside, so as to no longer join the two.We already established in the previous chapter that cold states
arise for a variety of internal, external and incidental reasons –
all of which draw their origins from a dissimilarity in inward
inclinations.This makes plain the truth, that unless outward affections have
present in them inner affections that join the partners’ minds,
marriages come apart in the home.
- 275. [Inward affections hold marriages
- (5) Nevertheless, marriages in the world are
to continue to the end of one or the other’s life.- 276. [Marriages are to continue]
276. (5) Nevertheless, marriages in the world are to continue
to the end of life. We cite this point to present more clearly to
the sight of reason how necessary, useful and true it is that in
marriages where married love is not genuine, it should still be
affected or be made to appear as though it were. It would be
different if marriages once entered into were not compacts to the
end of life, but could be dissolved at will. Such was the case in
the Israelite nation, which arrogated to itself the right to put
away their wives for any reason, as is apparent from this account
in Matthew:The Pharisees…came…, saying to (Jesus), “Is it lawful
for a man to divorce his wife for any reason?”Then when Jesus answered that it was not lawful to divorce a
wife and marry another excepting for licentiousness, they replied
that Moses had nevertheless commanded them to give her a
certificate of divorce and put her away. And the disciples said,“If such be the case of a man with his wife, it is better
not to marry.” (Matthew 19:3-10)[2] Since the marriage covenant is accordingly a covenant for
life, it follows that appearances of love and friendship between
married partners are necessary.The principle that marriages once contracted are to continue on
to the end of life in the world is based on Divine law, and being
based on this, it is a matter also of rational law and therefore
of civil law. It is based on the Divine law which says that it is
not lawful to divorce a wife and marry another excepting on the
grounds of licentiousness, as cited above. It is a matter of
rational law, because rational law is founded on spiritual law,
since the Divine law and rational law are the same. In the light
of the one and the other together, or by considering the rational
law in the light of the Divine law, it may appear to a great
number of people what monstrous and destructive ruinations of
society and dissolutions of marriages would result if divorcings
of wives were at the good pleasure of husbands, prior to death.
What monstrous and destructive ruinations of society would result
may be seen in some measure in the narrative account in which the
origin of married love was discussed by the people gathered from
the nine kingdoms, nos. 103-114, to which it is
unnecessary to add further arguments.However, these considerations do not prevent separations from
being permitted for their own reasons, as discussed above in nos.
252-254, and also the taking of a mistress,
which we consider in Part Two.[*1][*1] See “Taking a Mistress,” nos. 462ff.
- 276. [Marriages are to continue]
- (6) In marriages in which inward affections
do not join the partners, outward affections may exist which
simulate inward ones and keep the two together.- 277. [Simulated affections can keep the two
together]277. (6) In marriages in which inward affections do not join
the partners, outward affections may exist which simulate inward
ones and keep the two together. By inward affections we mean
mutual inclinations that exist in the mind of each from heaven,
while by outward affections we mean inclinations that exist in the
mind of each from the world. These latter affections or
inclinations are indeed equally qualities of the mind, but they
occupy its lower region, whereas inward affections occupy a higher
one.Nevertheless, because both are accorded their seat in the mind,
it may be believed that they are alike and congruent. Even if they
are nevertheless not alike, still they can appear as though they
were, although in some cases these appearances are adopted as
expedients, and in some cases as gentle pretenses.[2] As a result of the initial marriage covenant, there is a
certain community of life implanted in married partners, which
still remains rooted in them even if they differ in disposition
and character. They share, for example, a community of
possessions, and in many cases a community of duties in the
services they perform and in meeting the various demands of the
home, leading in turn to a community of thoughts and certain
shared secrets. They also have a community of life from sharing a
bed and in the love they have for their offspring. Added to these
are a number of other bonds which, being graven on the marriage
covenant, are therefore also graven on their minds.These bonds give rise primarily to outward affections that
resemble inward ones. Affections which only simulate inward ones,
on the other hand, come partly from this origin and partly from
another. However, these are each discussed in considerations that
follow.
- 277. [Simulated affections can keep the two
- (7) The result is apparent love, or apparent
friendship and favor, between the partners.- 278. [Apparent love and friendship]
278. (7) The result is apparent love, or apparent friendship
and favor, between the partners. Instances of apparent love,
friendship and favor develop in consequence of the fact that the
marriage covenant is a compact to the end of life, and in
consequence of the marital community of life graven on the two
thus pledged, which gives birth to outward affections resembling
inward ones, as indicated just above. In addition, they develop
also in consequence of considerations that are useful and matters
of necessity. It is partly such considerations which give rise to
outward affections either shared or simulated, which cause an
outward love or an outward friendship to appear as though it were
an inward one.
- 278. [Apparent love and friendship]
- (8) These appearances are simulations of
married love, which are commendable because they are useful and
necessary.- 279. [Simulations are commendable]
279. (8) These appearances are simulations of married love,
which are commendable because they are useful and necessary. We
call them simulations because they exist between partners who
differ in mind, and who because of these differences are inwardly
in a state of coldness. When the partners nevertheless in outward
respects live a companionable life together as is fitting and
proper, then their interrelations in living together may be called
simulations, but marital simulations, which, being commendable
because of the uses they serve, are altogether different from
hypocritical ones; for by their means they provide for all those
good ends which are enumerated in succession under headings (11)
to (20) below. They are commendable as necessities, because
otherwise those good ends would be cast aside; and yet their
living together is enjoined by covenant and law, so that it is
incumbent on them both as a duty.
- 279. [Simulations are commendable]
- (9) In a spiritual person joined to a
natural one, these simulations of married love are a matter of
justice and judgment.- 280. [Simulations are a matter of justice and
judgment]280. (9) In a spiritual person joined to a natural one, these
simulations of married love are a matter of justice and judgment.
That is because a spiritual person does what he does in accordance
with justice and judgment. Therefore he does not see these
simulations as estranged from his inward affections but as coupled
together with them. For he is serious in his actions and looks to
amendment as the goal; and if this is not attained, he looks to
accommodation, for the sake of order in the home, for the sake of
maintaining their assistance to each other, for the sake of
providing for the care of infants, for the sake of peace and
tranquillity. He is led to these intentions by a sense of justice,
and with judgment he carries them into practice.This is the way a spiritual person lives with a natural one,
because a spiritual person behaves spiritually, even with one who
is natural.
- 280. [Simulations are a matter of justice and
- (10) In natural people, these simulations of
married love are a matter of prudence for various reasons.- 281. [Simulations are a matter of prudence]
281. (10) In natural people, these simulations of married love
are a matter of prudence, for various reasons. It is impossible
for an interior love to exist between two married partners, one of
whom is spiritual, the other natural. By spiritual we mean one who
loves spiritual things and who thus has his wisdom from the Lord;
and by natural we mean one who loves only natural things and who
thus has his wisdom from himself. When two people like this are
joined in marriage, married love in the spiritual partner is warm
and in the natural partner cold. It is plain that warmth and
coldness cannot coexist, thus that warmth cannot ignite the one in
a state of coldness unless the coldness is first dispelled, or
coldness flow into the one in a state of warmth unless the warmth
is first removed. That is why it is impossible for an interior
love to exist between married partners when one of them is
spiritual and the other natural, but that a love resembling an
interior one may exist on the part of the spiritual partner, as we
said under an earlier heading.[*1][2] On the other hand, no interior love is possible between
natural partners, because they are both cold. If they experience
feelings of warmth, it is owing to an unchaste love. Nevertheless,
partners like this can still live together in the same house
despite their being divided in spirit, and they can also feign
seeming expressions of love and friendship in their relations with
each other, no matter how mutually discordant their minds. In
their case outward affections may be set on fire, so to speak,
which are concerned for the most part with wealth and possessions
or with honor and positions of rank; and because this fire induces
a fear of losing such things, simulations of married love are to
them necessary, being adopted chiefly for the reasons cited under
headings (15) to (17) below. They may also be adopted for the
other reasons enumerated with these, in which case they may have
something in common with the reasons of a spiritual person,
mentioned in no. 280 above; but only if the
prudence in the natural person includes a measure of intelligence.[*1] See no. 277.
- 281. [Simulations are a matter of prudence]
- (11) They are adopted as means of amendment
and as means of accommodation.- 282. [Amendment and accommodation]
282. (11) They are adopted as means of amendment and as means
of accommodation. Simulations of married love are appearances of
love and friendship between partners who differ in spirit; and
they are adopted as means of amendment when a spiritual person is
bound together by covenant of marriage with a natural one, because
a spiritual person’s whole intention is to amend their life. This
he accomplishes by wise and refined conversations and by favors
appealing to the other’s nature. If these fall on deaf ears,
however, and fail to affect the behavior of the other, he has as
his intention to find means of accommodation, for the sake of
preserving order in their domestic affairs, for the sake of
maintaining the assistance they render each other, and for the
sake of the infants and children, in addition to other, similar
ends. For the words and deeds that issue from a spiritual person
are inspired by justice and judgment, as we showed above in no.
280.[2] By contrast, in the case of partners neither of whom is
spiritual but both natural, a similar effort may be made, but for
other ends. If one or the other looks to amendment or
accommodation, either his purpose is to coerce the other into
conduct similar to his own and to subordinate the other to his
wishes, or it is to gain certain services and turn them to his
benefit and advantage. Or it may be for the sake of peace within
the home, or for the sake of their reputation outside the home. Or
it may be for the sake of various benefits hoped for from the
partner or from the partner’s relatives. Or it may be for the sake
of other ends. However, in some people these ends are owing to a
prudence born of reason, in some to a native civility, in some to
a fear of losing the pleasures of lusts customary in them from
birth, and other causes, the effect of which is to make their
affectations of favor and seeming expressions of married love
either more or less insincere.There are also cases in which displays of favor and seeming
expressions of married love are adopted outside the home and none
inside the home; but these are for the sake of their reputation,
or if not for the sake of this, they are in the nature of a game.
- 282. [Amendment and accommodation]
- (12) They are adopted to preserve order in
the couple’s domestic affairs and to maintain their assistance to
each other.- 283. [Domestic order]
283. (12) They are adopted to preserve order in the couple’s
domestic affairs and to maintain their assistance to each other.
Every household that includes children, their tutors and other
domestic help is a miniature society resembling the larger one.
The larger one, indeed, consists of these smaller units, as a
whole formed of its parts; and as the welfare of the larger
society depends on the presence of order, so also does the welfare
of this smaller society. Consequently, as it is important for
civil officers to keep watch and see to it that order exists and
is preserved in the collective society, so it is important for
married partners to do the same in their individual society.This order, however, is not possible if husband and wife differ
in spirit; for their offerings of mutual counsel and aid are drawn
by these differences in divergent directions and become as divided
as the partners are in spirit, on which account the form of a
little society is rent asunder. To preserve order, therefore, and
by this means to protect themselves and at the same time their
household, or their household and at the same time themselves, so
that they do not go to ruin and collapse in disaster, necessity
requires that master and mistress agree and act in harmony. Even
if they cannot do this owing to their difference of minds, still
for all to be well it is both fitting and proper that they achieve
it by a representative show of marital friendship. People know
that agreements in household matters are thus patched together for
reasons that are necessary and therefore useful.
- 283. [Domestic order]
- (13) They are adopted because of their
shared involvement in the care of infants and concern for their
children.- 284. [For the sake of the children]
284. (13) They are adopted because of their shared involvement
in the care of infants and concern for their children. It is well
known that simulations of married love spring up between married
partners, or appearances of love and friendship that resemble
truly marital ones, because of their infants and children. Their
common love causes each partner to regard the other with kindness
and favor.Love in the mother and love in the father for their infants and
children are allied, like the heart and the lungs in the breast. A
love of them in the mother is like the heart there, and a love for
them in the father is like the lungs there. We make this
comparison because the heart corresponds to love, and the lungs to
understanding; and love arising from the will is what a mother
feels, and love arising from the understanding is what a father
feels.In the case of spiritual men a marital bond is formed by means
of this love in accordance with justice and judgment: in
accordance with justice, because the mother once carried them in
her womb, in pain gave birth to them, and afterwards with
unwearying care went on to nurse them, feed them, bathe them,
clothe them and bring them up.
- 284. [For the sake of the children]
- (14) They are adopted for the sake of peace
in the home.- 285. [Peace in the home]
285. (14) They are adopted for the sake of peace in the home.
It is primarily men who adopt simulations of married love or
outward shows of friendship for the sake of peace and tranquillity
at home. This is owing to their natural characteristic of doing
what they do by an exercise of the intellect. Because the
intellect is a thinking faculty, it occupies itself with various
matters which disturb, distract and trouble their spirit.
Consequently, if they were to find no peace at home, eventually
their vital forces would languish, their inner life would sink
almost into a state of death, and thus the health of both mind and
body would be ruined. Men’s minds would be assailed by the fears
of these and many other dangers if they did not find havens of
refuge at home with their wives to calm the turmoils of their
intellect.[2] Besides, peace and tranquillity soothe their minds and
dispose them to receive favorably kindnesses offered by their
wives, who spend every effort to dispel from their minds the
clouds which they keenly observe in their husbands. And this also
makes their wives’ presence agreeable.It is apparent from this that a simulation and seeming display
of true married love for the sake of peace and tranquillity at
home is both necessary and useful.To this we add the further note that simulations on the part of
wives are not the same as simulations on the part of men. Even if
they appear similar to them, they are expressions of real love,
because women are born forms of love for the understanding of men.
They accept their husbands’ displays of favor graciously,
therefore, if not in words, still in heart.
- 285. [Peace in the home]
- (15) They are adopted for the sake of their
reputation outside the home.- 286. [Reputation outside the home]
286. (15) They are adopted for the sake of their reputation
outside the home. The fortunes of men depend for the most part on
their reputation for being just, honest and upright; and this
reputation in turn depends on the wife, who knows her husband’s
private life. Consequently, if differences between their minds
were to break out into open displays of enmity, quarreling and
rancorous threats, and if these were to be made publicly known by
the wife and her friends, or by the domestic help, they would
easily be turned into reasons for condemnation that would bring
dishonor and disgrace to his name. To avoid such eventualities, a
man has no other recourse but to either simulate favor toward his
wife or separate from her so that they no longer live in the same
house.
- 286. [Reputation outside the home]
- (16) They are adopted for the sake of
various benefits expected from the partner or from the partner’s
relatives, and thus because of a fear of losing them.- 287. [Benefits from partner and in-laws]
287. (16) They are adopted for the sake of various benefits
expected from the partner or from the partner’s relatives, and
thus because of a fear of losing them. This happens primarily in
marriages in which the partners are of dissimilar station and
condition, on which subject see no. 250 above.
Such a circumstance exists, for example, when a man marries a
wealthy wife, and she stashes away her money in moneybags or her
valuables in securities; and still more if she boldly insists that
it is the husband’s duty to maintain the household out of his
income and earnings. It is common knowledge that semblances and
seeming displays of married love are compelled as a result.Similar circumstances exist when a man marries a wife whose
parents, relatives and friends are established in high positions,
in profitable businesses or in commercial operations, who are able
to exercise control over her more fortunate condition. It is
common knowledge that simulations and seeming displays of married
love are adopted on these accounts as well.In cases like this in which various benefits are expected, it
is obvious that these semblances and simulations are adopted
because of a fear of losing them.
- 287. [Benefits from partner and in-laws]
- (17) They are adopted in order to have one’s
flaws excused, and thus to avoid disgrace.- 288. [Avoiding disgrace]
288. (17) They are adopted in order to have one’s flaws
excused, and thus to avoid disgrace. Flaws which cause married
partners to fear disgrace are of many kinds, some serious, some
not so serious. By flaws we mean flaws of the mind and flaws of
the body of less consequence than the impairments listed as
reasons for separation in the previous chapter (nos. 252,
253). What we mean, therefore, are flaws which,
because of their disgraceful nature, are kept quiet by the other
partner. Besides these, in some cases there are inadvertent
violations of the law, which would be subject to legal penalties
if they were divulged. Also the loss of a man’s sexual readiness,
which is something men ordinarily pride themselves on.It is apparent without need of further substantiation that to
have flaws of this kind excused in order to avoid disgrace is
reason for a person’s simulating love and friendship in his
relations with his partner.
- 288. [Avoiding disgrace]
- (18) They are adopted as means of
reconciliation.- 289. [Reconcilation]
289. (18) They are adopted as means of reconciliation. Between
partners who for various reasons are discordant in mind,
intermittent states occur of disagreement and trust, of
estrangement and union, indeed of quarreling and making up, thus
of reconciliation. This is something that is known in the world;
and also that their reconciliations are effected by shows of
apparent friendship.There are also reconciliations effected after periods of
separation which are not so sporadic and transitory.
- 289. [Reconcilation]
- (19) If favor does not cease on the wife’s
part when ability ceases in the man, a friendship resembling a
marital one may develop as they grow older.- 290. [Friendship in old age]
290. (19) If favor does not cease on the wife’s part when
ability ceases in the man, a friendship resembling a marital one
may develop as they grow older. Of the reasons between married
partners for a separation of their spirits, a primary one is a
dwindling of favor on the part of the wife as ability ceases in
the man, so that they no longer make love. For just as states of
warmth communicate with each other, so do states of coldness. It
then comes to pass that, with the waning of lovemaking on the part
of each, their friendship ceases, and if they do not fear the
ruination of their private life in the home, also any feeling of
favor. That this happens is plain from both reason and experience.If therefore to avoid this the man quietly attributes the cause
to himself, and the wife still perseveres in a chaste attitude of
favor toward him, a new friendship may develop on that account,
which, being between married partners, appears as something
resembling married love.That a friendship resembling one of married love is possible
between older married partners is attested by experience, from
their tranquil, secure, and amiable associations, interactions and
relations with each other, full of mutual courtesy.
- 290. [Friendship in old age]
- (20) Various types of apparent love and
friendship are possible between partners in cases where one has been
subjugated and is thus subservient to the other.- 291. [Power and submission]
291. (20) Various types of apparent love and friendship are
possible between partners in cases where one has been subjugated
and is thus subservient to the other. After a married couple has
passed through the initial stages of marriage, contests arise
between them over who has what right and who has what power. The
dispute over who has what right turns about the fact that
according to the terms of their compact and covenant they have
equality, and yet each has his own standing in duties connected
with his role. The dispute over who has what power then arises
from the fact that men insist on having superiority in all matters
affecting the household just because they are men, leaving women
in a position of inferiority just because they are women. That
this is what happens is something people are aware of in today’s
world.Such familiar contests at the present day spring from no other
circumstance than people’s ignorance of true married love and
their lack of any perception or sensation of the blessings of that
love. In the absence of an awareness and perception or sensation
of these things, instead of true married love comes a desire to
possess which masquerades as that love. With genuine love removed,
from this desire wells a striving for power, an endeavor which in
some cases is a matter of delight arising from a love of ruling,
which in some cases is a tactic instilled by shrewd women before
the wedding, and which in some cases is provoked.[2] When men have this as their endeavor and after a succession
of struggles obtain the mastery, they then reduce their wives to
the condition of being either a possession at their disposal, or
toadies obedient to their will, or indentured servants, depending
on the degree of their will to prevail and the capability they
have inherent or latent in them. On the other hand, if wives have
this as their endeavor and after a succession of struggles obtain
the mastery, they then reduce their husbands to the condition of
being either equal to them in privilege, or toadies obedient to
their will, or indentured servants. However, in the case of wives,
after they have obtained the scepter of command, their desire to
possess that masquerades as married love remains, being held in
check by law and the fear of legitimate separation if they extend
their power beyond just limits; and since it remains, they
therefore lead a companionable life with their husbands.[3] But what sort of love and friendship exists between a
domineering wife and a subservient husband, or between a
domineering husband and a subservient wife, cannot be described in
a few words. Even if their different types were condensed into
classes and these classes were listed, several pages would not
suffice; for they vary in character and kind. They vary in
character in the case of men according to the nature of their will
to prevail; so likewise in the case of wives. And their
diversities in men differ in kind from those which are
identifiable with women. They differ in kind, because men of this
sort feel no friendship of love other than a foolish one, whereas
wives feel the friendship of an illusory love stemming from their
desire to possess.By what art wives acquire for themselves power over men shall
now be told under the following heading.
- 291. [Power and submission]
- (21) There are hellish marriages in the
world in which the partners are inwardly bitter enemies and yet
outwardly seem like the closest of friends.- 292. [Hellish marriages]
292. (21) There are hellish marriages in the world in which the
partners are inwardly bitter enemies and yet outwardly seem like
the closest of friends. Actually, I am forbidden by wives of this
sort in the spiritual world to bring the existence of such
marriages to public notice; for they are afraid that their art of
acquiring power over men will be exposed at the same time, which
they for their part are extremely eager to keep concealed.
However, being spurred by men in the same world to make known the
reasons for their internal hatred and virtual rage, injected into
their hearts against their wives in consequence of those secret
arts of theirs, I would like simply to present here the following
reports.According to the men, they unconsciously contracted a terrific
fear of their wives. As a result they could not help but slavishly
obey their wives’ wishes and do their bidding more submissively
than the humblest of servants, so that they became practically
spiritless weaklings. Moreover, they said, those who became such
in relation to their wives included not only men without any
standing or position, but also men in high standing and great
position, even strong and distinguished leaders. They said, too,
that after contracting this terror they could not work up any
courage to speak with their wives in other than a friendly way, or
to do for them anything but what met their fancy, even though they
harbored a deadly hatred towards their wives in their hearts. And
yet their wives continued to speak and behave with them in
courteous fashion, they said, and to listen dutifully to some of
their requests.[2] Now because these men wondered themselves why there arose
in them such animosity inwardly and such apparent amiability
outwardly, they sought the reasons from women who knew the secret
art that caused it; and from what those women told them, they
said, they learned that women deeply conceal a knowledge within
them by which they know how to skillfully tame men, if they wish,
and make them subject to their command. They learned further that,
on the part of ill-bred wives, this is accomplished by scoldings
and periodic commendations; in some cases by continually hard and
unpleasant looks, and in similar cases by other tactics. On the
part of well-bred wives, however, it is accomplished by persistent
and incessant pressings of requests, and by stubbornly resisting
and opposing their husbands if they suffer hardships on their
account, insisting on their right of equality by law and making
themselves brazenly obstinate because of it. Even if they were to
be expelled from the house, they say, they would return at will
and continue to pursue the same demands. For they know that the
nature of men makes it altogether impossible for them to withstand
the persistent efforts of their wives, and that once men have
yielded they then submit themselves to their wives’ wishes. At
that point, said the men, once the wives have them under their
control, they then show their husbands courteous and amiable
treatment.(The real reason wives are able to gain control by such guile
is that a man acts in accord with his intellect and a woman in
accord with her will; and the will can be stubborn, but not the
intellect. I have been told that the worst of this lot are
inwardly consumed with a desire to rule and can doggedly stick to
their persistent endeavors even to the last breath of life.)[3] I have also heard justifications from the aforementioned
women in the spiritual world as to why they entered into the
practice of this art. They said they would not have entered into
it except that they foresaw the supreme contempt, future rejection
and thus utter ruin that lay ahead for them if they were to be
beaten down by their husbands. Thus, they said, out of necessity
they had taken up these weapons of theirs. To this they added the
following warning for men, to leave to their wives their rights,
and when they experience periodic states of coldness, not to
regard their wives as inferior and treat them worse than they
would servants. They said as well that many of their sex are not
prepared to practice this art owing to an innate timidity (though
I put in, owing to an innate modesty.)This now is sufficient to make known what we mean by hellish
marriages in the world, in which the partners are inwardly bitter
enemies and yet outwardly seem like the closest of friends.
- 292. [Hellish marriages]
- Seven wives sitting in a rose garden, who
made various comments on the subject of married love (no. 293).- 293. [Seven wives sitting in a rose garden]
293. To this I will append two narrative accounts. Here is the
first:I once looked out my window toward the east and saw seven women
sitting next to a rose garden by a spring drinking water. I
strained my eyes intently to see what they were doing, and the
intensity of my gaze caught their attention. With a motion of the
head one of them therefore invited me over. Accordingly I left the
house and hurried in their direction. And when I arrived, I
politely asked them where they were from.They then said, “We are wives. We are talking here about
the delights of married love, and we have concluded from a good
deal of evidence that these delights are also delights of wisdom.”This response so delighted my heart that I seemed to be more
interiorly in the spirit and to have on that account a more
enlightened perception than ever before. So I said to them,
“Permit me an opportunity to ask you some questions about
those pleasant delights.” And they nodded their assent.So I asked, “How do you wives know that the delights of
married love are at the same time delights of wisdom?”[2] They then replied, “We know it from the correspondence
that exists between wisdom in our husbands and the delights of
married love in us. For the delights of this love in us heighten
or diminish and take on altogether different qualities according
to the wisdom in our husbands.”On hearing this I inquired further, saying, “I know you
are affected by gentle words from your husbands and cheerful
states of mind on their part, and that you take delight on account
of these with all your heart. But I wonder at your saying that it
is in response to their wisdom. However, tell me what wisdom is
and what sort of wisdom you mean.”[3] To this the wives replied with annoyance, “You think
we do not know what wisdom is and what sort of wisdom we mean,
even though we continually reflect on it in our husbands and daily
learn it from their mouths. Indeed, we wives think about the state
of our husbands from morning to evening, with scarcely any time
intervening in a day when this is interrupted or in which our
instinctive thought is entirely withdrawn or gone from them. Our
husbands in contrast spend very little time in the course of a day
thinking about our state. As a result we know what sort of wisdom
in them finds delight in us. Our husbands call this wisdom a
spiritual-rational wisdom and a spiritual-moral one.
Spiritual-rational wisdom, they say, is a matter of the intellect
and its intellectual concepts, while spiritual-moral wisdom is a
matter of the will and its mode of life. Yet they join the two
together and regard them as one; and they maintain that the
pleasant delights of this wisdom are transposed from their minds
into delights in our hearts, and from our hearts back to their
hearts, so that these return to the wisdom from which they
originated.”[4] I then asked whether they knew anything more about this
wisdom in their husbands – “wisdom,” I said, “which
finds delight in you.”“We do,” they said. “It is a spiritual wisdom,
and from that a rational and moral one. Spiritual wisdom is to
acknowledge the Lord our Savior as God of heaven and earth, and
through the Word and discourses from it to acquire from Him truths
connected with the Church, from which comes a spiritual
rationality; and in addition to live from Him according to those
truths, from which comes a spiritual morality. Our husbands call
these two the wisdom which in general works to produce true
married love. We have also heard from them the reason, namely,
that this wisdom opens the inner faculties of their mind and thus
of their body, providing free passage from the firsts to the last
of these for the stream of love, on whose flow, sufficiency and
strength married love depends for its existence and life.“As regards marriage in particular, the spiritual-rational
and spiritual-moral wisdom of our husbands has as its end and goal
to love only their wives and to rid themselves of all desire for
other women. Moreover, to the extent they achieve this, to that
extent that love is heightened in degree and perfected in quality,
and the more clearly and keenly do we then feel matching delights
in us corresponding to the contented pleasures of our husbands’
affections and the pleasant exaltations of their thoughts.”[5] I asked them next whether they knew how the communication
took place.They said, “All conjunction by love requires action,
reception, and reaction. The state of our love and its delights is
the agent or that which acts. The state of our husbands’ wisdom is
the recipient or that which receives. And this same wisdom is also
the reagent or that which reacts in accordance with their
reception. This reaction is then perceived by us with feelings of
delight in our hearts according to our state and the measure in
which it is continually open and ready to receive those elements
which in some way are connected with and so emanate from virtue in
our husbands, thus which in some way are connected with and so
emanate from the final state of love in us.”At that point they also inserted, “Take care you do not
interpret the delights we have mentioned to mean the end delights
of married love. We never talk about these, but only about the
delights of our hearts which constantly correspond to the state of
wisdom in our husbands.”[6] After that there appeared in the distance what looked like
a dove in flight with a leaf from a tree in its mouth; but as it
drew near, instead of a dove we saw a little boy with a piece of
paper in his hand. Coming over to us then, he held it out to me
and said, “Read it in the presence of these maidens of the
spring.”So I read the following:
Tell the inhabitants of the earth among whom you live that
there is such a thing as true married love, offering a million
delights scarcely any of which are yet known to the world. But
they will be discovered when the church betroths itself to her
Lord and becomes His bride and wife.Then I asked the wives, “Why did the boy call you “maidens
of the spring”?”“We are called maidens when we sit by this spring,”
they replied, “because we are forms of affection for the
truths of our husbands’ wisdom; and an affection for truth in form
is termed a maiden. The spring likewise symbolizes the truth of
wisdom, and the rose garden we are sitting next to its delights.”[7] One of the seven wives then wove a garland of roses; and
sprinkling it with water from the spring, she placed it over the
cap the boy had on, fitting it around his little head and saying,
“Receive the delights of intelligence. Your cap, you see,
symbolizes intelligence, and the garland from this rose garden its
delights.”Thus adorned the boy then departed, and in the distance he
looked once more like a dove in flight, but this time with a
little crown on its head.
- 293. [Seven wives sitting in a rose garden]
- The same wives on the prudence of women (no.
294).- 294. [The prudence of women]
294. The second account:
Several days later I again saw the same seven wives in a rose
garden, but in a different one from the one previously. It was a
magnificent garden, the like of which I had never seen before. It
was laid out almost in a circle, and the roses in it formed a kind
of rainbow-like arc. Purple-colored roses or flowers formed its
outmost ring; golden-yellow ones the next ring in; dark-blue ones
the ring inside that; and bluish-green or bright-green ones the
inmost ring. And enclosed within that rainbow-like rose garden was
a little pool of clear water.Those seven wives, previously called maidens of the spring,
were sitting there, and seeing me at my window they again called
me over. Then, when I arrived, they said, “Have you ever seen
anything more beautiful on earth?”“Never,” I said.
So they said, “A marvel like this is created by the Lord
in instant, and it represents a new development on earth, for
everything created by the Lord represents something. But divine if
you can what that is. We are guessing that it is the delights of
married love.”[2] On hearing this I said, “What are the delights of
married love, of which you spoke with so much wisdom and also so
much eloquence last time? After I left you, I related what you
said to wives living in our world, and I told them, “Having
now been instructed, I know that you feel delights in your hearts
arising from your married love, which you are able to communicate
to your husbands in accordance with their wisdom. I also know that
from morning to evening you therefore continually contemplate your
husbands with the eyes of your spirit and consider how to turn and
guide their hearts to becoming wise, in order that you may realize
those delights.” I further reported what you meant by wisdom,
saying that it is a spiritual-rational and spiritual-moral wisdom,
and that as regards marriage it is to love only one’s wife and to
rid oneself of all desire for other women.“But to this the wives in our world responded with
laughter, saying, “What are you talking about? What you have
said is preposterous. We do not know what married love is. If our
husbands experience anything of it, still we do not. How then do
its delights originate with us? Indeed, when it comes to the
delights which you call the end delights, we sometimes resist
vehemently, for to us they are repugnant, in almost the same way
as acts of rape. In fact, if you look, you will not see one sign
of any such love in our faces. Therefore you are either talking
nonsense or joking if, like those seven wives of yours, you too
say that we think about our husbands from morning to evening and
continually give attention to their wishes and pleasures, in order
that we may gain from them delights such as those!”“I have retained from the responses of those wives these
declarations, to report them to you, since they call into dispute
and even more entirely contradict the discourse I heard from you
by the spring, which I listened to so eagerly and also believed.”[3] To this the wives sitting in the rose garden replied, “Dear
friend, you do not know the wisdom and prudence of wives, because
they hide it altogether from men and keep it hidden precisely in
order to be loved by them. For every man who is not spiritually
rational and moral but only naturally so possesses a coldness
towards his wife, such a coldness being inherent in him in his
inmost elements. This coldness a wise and prudent wife acutely and
keenly notices, and she then conceals her married love,
withdrawing into her heart so much of it and hiding it there so
deeply that not the least bit of it appears in her face, her tone
of voice, or gesture. She does this, because to the extent her
love appears, to that extent a man’s coldness with respect to
marriage pours forth from the inmost elements of his mind where it
resides and descends into its outmost expressions, producing a
total frigidity in the body and an urge to separate himself
therefore from the bed and bedroom.”[4] I asked them then, “What causes such coldness, which
you call coldness with respect to marriage.”“It comes from a lack of rationality on their part in
matters of the spirit. Every man who is irrational in matters of
the spirit is inmostly cold to his wife and inmostly warm toward
harlots. And because married love and licentious love are opposed
to each other, it follows that married love becomes cold whenever
licentious love is warm. Then, when coldness reigns in a man, he
cannot endure any feeling of love or even therefore any whisper of
it from his wife. That is why a wife so wisely and prudently
conceals it; and to the extent she does this by denying and
resisting, to that extent a wanton atmosphere flows in which
revives and restores the man’s interest. As a result the wife of a
man like that does not experience any delights of the heart such
as we do, but only physical gratifications, which on the man’s
part have to be termed pleasures of insanity, because they are the
pleasures of a licentious love.[5] “Every chaste wife loves her husband, even a husband
who is unchaste; but because wisdom is the only quality that
receives her love, therefore a wife spends every effort to turn
his insanity into wisdom, at least to the point that he does not
desire any other women but her. This she accomplishes in a
thousand ways, taking especial care that none of these ways be
detected by her husband; for she well knows that love cannot be
compelled, but is subtly infused in a state of freedom. For that
reason it is granted to women to discern from sight, hearing and
touch their husbands’ every state of mind, while it is not granted
to men conversely to discern any of their wives’ states of mind.[6] “A chaste wife can look at her husband with a stern
expression, speak to him in a sharp voice, and even be angry at
him and fight with him, and yet at the same time in her heart
cherish a gentle and tender love for him. The object, however, of
these expressions of anger and concealments of love is wisdom and
a consequent reception of love on the part of her husband, as is
clearly apparent from how quickly she can be placated. Wives
furthermore have such ways of concealing the love implanted in
their heart and marrows in order by these means to keep a man’s
coldness with respect to marriage from breaking out in him and
extinguishing even the fire of his licentious heat, the result of
which would be to turn him from green wood into a dry stick.”[7] After those seven wives made these statements and a number
of others like them, their husbands came with clusters of grapes
in their hands, some of which had a delicious flavor and some an
offensive one. So the wives said, “Why did you bring bad or
wild grapes, too?”“Because,” replied their husbands, “your souls
being united with ours, we perceived in our souls that you were
speaking with this man here about true married love, saying that
its delights are delights of wisdom, and also about licentious
love, saying that its delights are pleasures of insanity. The
grapes with the delicious flavor are the first kind of delights,
while the offensive-tasting or wild grapes are the second kind.”The husbands then confirmed what their wives had said, adding
that the pleasures of insanity appear in outward respects similar
to the delights of wisdom, but not in their inner qualities –
“just like the good and bad grapes that we brought,”
they said. “For both chaste and unchaste men are capable of a
similar wisdom in outward respects, but in its inner qualities
their wisdom is entirely different.”[8] After that the little boy came again with a piece of paper
in his hand, and he held it out to me, saying, “Read.”So I read as follows:
Be advised, all who read this, that the delights of married
love ascend up to the highest heaven, and on the way and in that
heaven they join with the delights of all heavenly loves, and so
enter into their felicity, which lasts to eternity. That is
because the delights of that love are also delights of wisdom.Be advised, too, that the pleasures of licentious love descend
down to the lowest hell, and on the way and in that hell they join
with the pleasures of all hellish loves, and so enter into their
misery, which consists in a frustration of all the heart’s
delights. That is because the pleasures of that love are also
pleasures of insanity.The husbands subsequently departed with their wives, and
accompanying the little boy as far as the path he took to ascend
to heaven, they discovered that the society he had been sent from
was a society of the New Heaven, the heaven with which the New
Church on earth will be affiliated.
- 294. [The prudence of women]
-
- 295. BETROTHALS AND WEDDINGS
-
- 295. [BETROTHALS AND WEDDINGS]
We take up betrothals and weddings here, and also the
formalities surrounding them, treating them primarily from the
perspective of the intellect and its reason. We treat them from
that perspective because the matters written in this book have as
their object to enable the reader to see truths in the light of his
rationality and so give assent; for thus his spirit is convinced,
and matters of which the spirit is convinced are accorded a
standing above those which enter without the reason’s being
consulted, as a result of someone else’s say-so and faith in his
authority. Indeed, the latter do not penetrate the head any deeper
than the memory, and there they become mingled together with
misconceptions and falsities, so as to have a standing below
rational matters which are matters of the understanding. Everyone
can speak in consequence of these as though in accordance with
reason, but in a backwards fashion; for he then thinks as a crab
walks, with the sight following the tail. It is the other way
around if he thinks in consequence of his understanding. Whenever
he thinks in consequence of this, his rational sight selects
appropriate matters from his memory and by them confirms in himself
truth already seen.[2] For that reason we consider in the present chapter a number
of practices which are accepted customs. For example, that choosing
whom to court is a prerogative of men; that parents should be
consulted; that gifts should be given as pledges; that a marriage
covenant should be established before the wedding; that this
covenant should be sanctified by a priest; that a wedding should be
celebrated; and so on. These and more are considered in order to
enable a person to see in the light of his rationality that such
practices are engraved on married love as its prerequisites, which
promote it and bring it to fulfillment.[3] The sections into which this discussion is divided are, in
order, the following:(1) Choosing whom to court is a prerogative of the man, and not
of the woman.(2) The man ought to court the woman and ask her to marry him,
and not the other way around.(3) The woman ought to consult her parents or guardians and then
deliberate in herself before giving consent.(4) After she declares her consent, gifts should be given as
pledges.(5) Their agreement to marry should be affirmed and established
by a formal betrothal.(6) By betrothal each is made ready for married love.
(7) By betrothal the mind of one is joined to the mind of the
other, so that a marriage of the spirit takes place before a
marriage of the body.(8) This happens in the case of people who think chastely in
regard to marriage, not so in the case of those who think
unchastely in regard to it.(9) During the time of their betrothal it is not lawful for them
to be joined physically.(10) After the period of their betrothal has been completed, the
wedding should take place.(11) Before the celebration of the wedding, a marriage covenant
should be established in the presence of witnesses.(12) The marriage should be solemnized by a priest.
(13) The wedding should be celebrated with festivity.
(14) After the wedding the marriage of the spirit becomes also
one of the body and thus complete.(15) This is the order and its steps by which married love
develops, from its first warmth to its first fire.(16) If married love is hastened prematurely without an orderly
development and its proper steps, it burns out the marrows and
dies.(17) States of mind progress in a sequential development, and in
each partner these progressive states flow into the state of their
marriage – though with one progression in the case of spiritual
people and another in the case of people who are natural.(18) For everywhere one finds a sequential order and a
concurrent order, and the concurrent order evolves from the
sequential order and in accordance with it.Explanation of these statements now follows.
- 295. [BETROTHALS AND WEDDINGS]
- (1) Choosing whom to court is a prerogative
of the man, and not of the woman.- 296. [The man chooses]
296. (1) Choosing whom to court is a prerogative of the man,
and not of the woman. This is because the man was born to be a
form of the intellect, whereas the woman was born to be a form of
love. Moreover, it is inherent in men commonly to love the
opposite sex in general, whereas it is inherent in women to love
one of the opposite sex. And further, it is not unbecoming for men
to speak of love and to declare it, while it is unbecoming for
women to do so. Nevertheless, women still have the option of
choosing one of a number of suitors.As regards the first reason, that choosing whom to court is a
prerogative of men because they were born to be forms of the
intellect – the reason is that the intellect can discern
congruities and incongruities and distinguish between them, and
with judgment make a suitable choice. It is different in the case
of women. Because they were born to be forms of love, they do not
have the same clarity of sight, and decisions to marry would in
their case be based only on inclinations of their love. Even if
they have from men the knowledge to distinguish between men, their
love is still swayed by appearances.[2] As regards the second reason why choosing whom to court is
a prerogative of men and not women – the reason is that it is
inherent in men commonly to love the opposite sex in general and
in women to love one of the opposite sex, and those who love the
opposite sex in general are able to freely look about and also
make a free decision. It is not the same for women, who have
implanted in them to love one of the opposite sex. To confirm
this, ask, if you like, the men among the people you meet about
monogamous marriage and polygamous marriage, and you will seldom
find any man who will not answer in favor of polygamous marriage,
which also means a love for the opposite sex in general. On the
other hand, ask women about these two kinds of marriage, and
almost all, other than prostitutes, will reject polygamous
marriages, which is why we say that it is in women to love one of
the opposite sex, thus to feel married love.[3] As for the third reason, it is evident in itself that it is
not unbecoming for men to speak of love and to declare it, while
it is unbecoming for women to do so. It follows for this reason as
well that it is for men to declare themselves, and if to declare
themselves, so also to choose whom to court.We say that women have the option of choosing one of a number
of suitors, which is something everyone knows. But this kind of
choice is a restricted and limited one, while that of men is broad
and not limited.
- 296. [The man chooses]
- (2) The man ought to court the woman and ask
her to marry him, and not the other way around.- 297. [The man courts]
297. (2) The man ought to court the woman and ask her to marry
him, and not the other way around. This is a consequence following
his choosing whom to court. Moreover, it is also honorable and
seemly for men to court women and ask them to marry them, whereas
it would not be seemly for women to do so in reverse. If women
were to do the courting and asking, they would not only be
censured, but after several times of asking they would also be
regarded as contemptible, or after marriage as slaves to lust,
with whom it would be impossible to have any domestic relations
other than cold and disgusting ones. Marriages would be thus
changed into tragic scenes. Wives on that account even turn it to
their credit that they yielded to their men’s pressing the
question, as though in surrender to them. Who does not envision
that if women were to court men, they would rarely be accepted,
but would be either shamefully rejected or seduced into wanton
acts, in addition to prostituting their modesty?Furthermore, men do not have any innate love for the opposite
sex, as evidenced earlier,[*1] and without that love, they lack an
inner enjoyment of life. Consequently, to enhance their life by
that love, it is incumbent on men to make appeals to women, by
politely, respectfully and humbly courting them and asking them to
grant that sweet addition to their lives. The beauty of that sex
in face, form and manners, surpassing that of men, also adds
itself as an obligation of the vow.[*1] See no. 161:2.
- 297. [The man courts]
- (3) The woman ought to consult her parents
or guardians and then deliberate in herself before giving consent.-
- 298. [The woman should consult her parents]
298. (3) The woman ought to consult her parents or guardians
and then deliberate in herself before giving consent. A woman
should consult her parents, because their deliberations and
counsels are guided by judgment, knowledge and love. By judgment,
because they are older, and their more advanced age is better able
to judge and see similarities and disparities. By knowledge,
because they know both the suitor and their daughter, learning
what they can about the suitor and being already acquainted with
their daughter, so that they draw conclusions about the two
together from having a joint sight of them. By love, because to
consider a daughter’s prospects and look ahead to her having her
own home is also in their daughter’s interest and a matter of
concern to them.
- 298. [The woman should consult her parents]
- 299. [She should deliberate in herself]
299. An altogether different situation eventuates if a daughter
consents to a petitioning suitor on her own without consulting her
parents or guardians. For she cannot weigh in the balance such a
matter that affects her future welfare and be guided by judgment,
knowledge and love. Not by judgment, because her judgment is still
in ignorance in regard to married life and in no position to
balance considerations for and against or to perceive the ways of
men from their native character. Not by knowledge or observation,
because she observes little beyond the domestic relations in her
parents’ home and in the homes of some companions, and she is not
equipped to investigate such matters as are private and personal
to her suitor. Neither by love, because when daughters first reach
a marriageable age, and also the age that follows, their love is
governed by infatuations of the senses and not as yet by the
desires of a mature mind.[2] Nevertheless, a daughter ought to deliberate on such a
matter in herself before giving consent, and this in order not to
be swept against her will into wedlock with a man she does not
love. For in such a case, consent on her part is lacking, and yet
it is consent which makes a marriage and which initiates her
spirit into married love. Consent that is unwillingly given or
coerced does not initiate her spirit, though it may the body, and
in that case it turns any chastity residing in the spirit into
lust, by which married love is corrupted at its first warmth.
-
- (4) After she declares her consent, gifts
should be given as pledges.- 300. [Gifts should be given]
300. (4) After she declares her consent, gifts should be given
as pledges. By pledges we mean gifts given after she declares her
consent which are affirmations, testifications, first favors and
treasures.These gifts are affirmations, because they are tokens of their
mutual consent. So when an agreement is reached between two
parties, people say, “Give me something in token of it;”
and when two have promised themselves in marriage and affirmed
their mutual promise by gifts, they are said to be pledged and
thus sworn.[2] These gifts are testifications, because as pledges they are
like continual witnesses visibly testifying to their love for each
other, being therefore also reminders of it, especially if they
are rings, lockets or pins which are worn openly to the sight. One
sees in them a kind of representative reflection of the intentions
of the future bridegroom and bride.These pledges are first favors, because married love includes a
promise of everlasting favor, of which these gifts are the first
fruits.These gifts are the treasures of love, as everyone knows, for
the mind is gladdened at the sight of them; and because they
reflect their love, these favors are dearer and more precious than
any other gifts, as though they held their hearts within.[3] Since these pledges are given in support of married love,
the giving of gifts following declarations of consent was an
accepted practice among ancient peoples, and on their being
accepted the couples were declared betrothed. It should be known,
however, that it is a matter of individual choice whether to
bestow these gifts before a formal betrothal or after it. If they
are given before, they are affirmations and testifications of a
couple’s consent to the betrothal; if given afterward, they are
affirmations and testifications also of their consent to the
wedding.
- 300. [Gifts should be given]
- (5) Their agreement to marry should be
affirmed and established by a formal betrothal.- 301. [Formal betrothal]
301. (5) Their agreement to marry should be affirmed and
established by a formal betrothal. Reasons for formal betrothals
are as follows:1. To encourage a mutual inclination of the couple’s souls to
each other following betrothal.2. To encourage a determination of a general love for the
opposite sex to the one of the sex.3. To encourage a mutual recognition of each other’s inward
affections and a conjunction of them through appeals to them in a
state of the inner gladness of love.4. To encourage a marriage of the couple’s spirits and a closer
and closer affiliation of these.5. To encourage in this way a proper progression of married
love from its first warmth to its nuptial flame.6. Consequently, to encourage a just and orderly progression
and development of married love from its spiritual origin.The state of betrothal may be likened to a state of spring
preceding summer, and the inner enjoyments of that state to the
flowerings of trees before their production of fruit. Since the
beginnings and progressions of married love develop in sequence in
order for them to flow into the fruitful love which begins with
the wedding, therefore betrothals take place in heaven as well.
- 301. [Formal betrothal]
- (6) By betrothal each is made ready for
married love.- 302. [Ready for married love]
302. (6) By betrothal each is made ready for married love. It
follows from the arguments presented in the preceding discussion
that by betrothal the mind or spirit of one is made ready for
union with the mind or spirit of the other, or to say the same
thing, the love of one with the love of the other.To those considerations we should add also the following, that
by the order engraved on it true married love ascends and
descends. It ascends from its first warmth progressively upward
towards people’s souls in an effort to form conjunctions there,
and this by continually more interior openings of their minds.
There is, moreover, no love which strives for these openings more
intensely, or which opens the interior recesses of minds more
forcefully and adeptly, than married love; for it is the soul in
each which impels it. On the other hand, in the very same moments
that this love ascends toward the soul, it also descends toward
the body and invests itself in it.[2] People should know, however, that married love is of the
same character in its descent as it is in the height to which it
ascends. If it soars aloft, it descends chaste; but if it does not
soar aloft, it descends unchaste. That is because the lower
elements of the mind are unchaste, while its higher elements are
chaste; for the lower elements of the mind cling to the body,
whereas the higher elements divorce themselves from such things.
(But for more on this subject, see no. 305
below.)From these few considerations it can be seen that the mind of
each is prepared for married love by betrothal, although in
various ways depending on their affections.
- 302. [Ready for married love]
- (7) By betrothal the mind of one is joined
to the mind of the other, so that a marriage of the spirit takes
place before a marriage of the body.- 303. [Marriage of the spirit]
303. (7) By betrothal the mind of one is joined to the mind of
the other, so that a marriage of the spirit takes place before a
marriage of the body. Because this follows as a consequence from
what we said above in nos. 301, 302,
we pass it by without adding further confirmations in accordance
with reason.
- 303. [Marriage of the spirit]
- (8) This happens in the case of people who
think chastely in regard to marriage, not so in the case of those
who think unchastely in regard to it.- 304. [People who think chastely]
304. (8) This happens in the case of people who think chastely
in regard to marriage, not so in the case of those who think
unchastely in regard to it. With chaste people – who are people
who think of marriage in accordance with religion – a marriage of
the spirit precedes and one of the body follows after. These are
also people in whom love ascends toward the soul and thus descends
from on high, as described above in no. 302.
Their souls turn away from an unrestricted love for the opposite
sex and devote themselves to one, looking to an everlasting and
eternal union with him or her and the growing blessings of that
union, which fuel in them a hope that continually refreshes their
minds.[2] It is entirely different with unchaste people, however, who
are people who do not think of marriage and its sanctity in
accordance with religion. In their case they experience a marriage
of the body and not one of the spirit. If during the state of
betrothal some trace of a marriage of the spirit appears, still,
even if this ascends through an elevation of their thoughts
concerning it, it nevertheless falls back into lusts which arise
from the flesh in the will of the flesh, thus casting itself
headlong from the unchaste elements there into the body and
polluting the outmost expressions of its love with a beguiling
ardor. So it is that as suddenly as love blazed in the beginning,
just as suddenly it burns out and vanishes into the coldness of
winter, thus quickening a waning of its ability. The state of
betrothal in their case does little more than to incite them to
fulfill their lusts with lascivious gratifications and by these
contaminate the marital relationship of love.
- 304. [People who think chastely]
- (9) During the time of their betrothal it is
not lawful for them to be joined physically.- 305. [No sex during betrothal]
305. (9) During the time of their betrothal it is not lawful
for them to be joined physically. For if they are the order
engraved on married love perishes.To explain this, there are in human minds three regions, the
highest of which is called celestial, the intermediate one
spiritual, and the lowest one natural. A person dwells by birth in
the lowest region, but he ascends into the next higher one, called
spiritual, by living according to truths of religion, and into the
highest one by achieving a marriage of love and wisdom.All kinds of evil and lascivious lusts reside in the lowest
region, which is called natural. In the next higher region,
however, which is called spiritual, there are no evil and
lascivious lusts, for this is the region into which a person is
led by the Lord when he is born anew. And in the highest region,
which is called celestial, one finds conjugal chastity surrounded
by its love. A person is raised into this last region by a love of
serving useful ends, and because marriage serves the most
excellent ends of all, by true married love.[2] One can see in summary from this that, from the first
beginnings of its warmth, married love has to be raised from the
lowest region into a higher one in order to become chaste and to
thus descend from a chaste origin through the intermediate and
lowest regions into the body. When this is the case, its
descending chastity purifies the lowest region of its unchaste
elements. This in turn causes the outmost expression of that love
to become also chaste.Now, if the sequential and orderly development of this love is
hastened prematurely by physical conjunctions before the proper
time, it follows that the person is acting from the lowest region
which by birth is unchaste. It is a familiar experience that this
occasions and gives rise to coldness toward the marriage and
indifference combined with loathing toward the other partner.But still, various differences occur in the outcomes of
premature conjunctions, likewise in the outcomes of an excessive
prolongation as well as of an excessive shortening of the time of
betrothal. However, because of their number and diversities, these
differences cannot easily be enumerated.
- 305. [No sex during betrothal]
- (10) After the period of their betrothal has
been completed, the wedding should take place.- 306. [The wedding]
306. (10) After the period of their betrothal has been
completed, the wedding should take place. Some ceremonies are
simply formalities, and some are at the same time also essential.
Among the latter are weddings. To confirm that weddings are among
those that are essential which ought to be duly witnessed and
formally celebrated, we cite the following reasons:1. A wedding marks the end of the former state inaugurated by
betrothal, which was primarily a state of the spirit, and the
beginning of the following state about to be inaugurated by
marriage, which is a state simultaneously of the spirit and body;
for the spirit then descends into the body and expresses itself
there. Therefore on that day they put off the state and also the
name of a couple engaged or promised, and take on the state and
name of married partners and a couple united in the flesh.2. A wedding introduces and initiates them into the new state,
the effect of which is to encourage the young woman to become a
wife and the young man a husband, that the two may become one
flesh. These goals are achieved when they are united by love
through its ultimate expressions. We have already shown in
previous discussions that marriage actually transforms a maiden
into a wife and a youth into a husband,[*1] and also that marriage
unites a couple into a single human form so that they are no
longer two but one flesh.[*2]3. A wedding guides them to a complete separation of love for
the opposite sex from married love, a separation that is achieved
when through full opportunity for conjunction the love of the one
becomes exclusively devoted to the love of the other.4. It seems in appearance as though weddings serve only to
demarcate the point between the two aforementioned states, and
thus that they are simply a formality which may be omitted. But
there is in them also this further and essential element, and that
is that the new state referred to must then be entered into by
covenant, with the consent of the couple declared in the presence
of witnesses, and that it must also be solemnized by a priest,
among other things, which serve to firmly establish it.Since weddings include elements that are essential, and since a
legitimate marriage is not formed until after them, therefore
weddings are celebrated also in heaven, as may be seen above in
no. 21, and after that in nos. 27-41.[*1] See, for example, no. 199.
- 306. [The wedding]
- (11) Before the celebration of the wedding,
a marriage covenant should be established in the presence of
witnesses.- 307. [A marriage covenant]
307. (11) Before the celebration of the wedding, a marriage
covenant should be established in the presence of witnesses. A
marriage covenant ought to be established before the wedding is
celebrated in order that the requirements and ordinances of true
married love may be acknowledged and a remembrance of them be
retained after the wedding. Such a covenant also serves as a bond,
obligating the couple’s minds to an honorable marriage. For after
some initial tastes of marriage their former state preceding
betrothal recurs at times, and in that state their memory fails
and they begin to forget the covenant they entered into. Indeed,
attractions in the case of unchaste people to unchaste desires
cause them to forget it altogether, and if it is then called to
mind, they curse it. To deter such transgressions, however,
society itself has taken under its jurisdiction to protect that
covenant, and has set penalties for those who break it.In sum, a prenuptial covenant makes plain the requirements of
true married love, establishes these, and binds libertines to
complying with them.In addition, such a covenant establishes the legitimacy of any
children they produce, and legally secures for the children a
right to inherit their parents’ possessions.
- 307. [A marriage covenant]
- (12) The marriage should be solemnized by a
priest.- 308. [A priest]
308. (12) The marriage should be solemnized by a priest. That
is because marriages regarded in themselves are spiritual and thus
sacred; for they descend from the heavenly marriage between good
and truth, and the various elements involved in marriage
correspond to the Divine marriage of the Lord and the church.
Marriages descend therefore from the Lord Himself, and are formed
according to the state of the church in the contracting parties.Now, because the ordained clergy on earth administers matters
which reflect the priesthood lodged in the Lord, that is, which
reflect His love, thus also matters which require His blessing, it
follows that marriages ought to be solemnized by His ministers.
And because His ministers are also then the chief witnesses, a
couple’s consent to the covenant ought to be heard, approved,
ratified and thus firmly established by them as well.
- 308. [A priest]
- (13) The wedding should be celebrated with
festivity.- 309. [Celebration]
309. (13) The wedding should be celebrated with festivity. The
reason is that the love which the bride and bridegroom felt before
the wedding then descends into their hearts and radiates from
there throughout their whole bodies, so that they begin to feel
the delights of being married. As a result, their minds are filled
with festive thoughts, and as far as is permissible and
respectable, they also let themselves go in festive behavior. In
support of this, it is useful for the festive feelings of their
minds to be shared by others, and for them to be introduced into
the joys of married love in this way.
- 309. [Celebration]
- (14) After the wedding the marriage of the
spirit becomes also one of the body and thus complete.- 310. [Marriage of the body]
310. (14) After the wedding the marriage of the spirit becomes
also one of the body and thus complete. Everything that a person
does in the body flows in from his spirit. For as we know, the
mouth does not speak of itself, but the thought of the mind by
means of it. Neither do the hands act or the feet move of
themselves, but the will of the mind by means of them.
Consequently we see that it is the mind that speaks in the body by
means of its organ of speech, and the mind that acts in the body
by means of its organs of action. It is apparent therefore that as
the mind is, such are the utterances of the mouth and actions of
the body.It follows as a conclusion from this that the mind continually
flows into the body and directs the body toward activities in
harmony with it and its development. Accordingly, viewed in
themselves, human bodies are simply replicas of minds outwardly
organized to carry out the bidding of the soul.This much is said by way of introduction to make perceptible
why it is that a couple’s minds or spirits should be united to
each other and as though married first, before they are united
also in respect to the body; namely, that the marriage may be a
marriage of the spirit when it becomes one of the body;
consequently, that the partners may love each other because of the
spirit and in body as a result of that.[2] From this perspective let us now consider marriage. When
married love joins a couple’s minds and molds them into a
marriage, it also then joins and molds their bodies for it; for as
said, the form of the mind is also, inwardly, the form of the
body, with the single difference, that the form of the body is
outwardly organized to carry out the ends to which its interior
form is directed by the mind. When the mind has been molded by
married love, moreover, not only is it inwardly present in the
whole body so as to radiate throughout, but it is inwardly present
further in the organs dedicated to reproduction, which are
situated in their own area below the other areas of the body. In
people who are united by married love, their cast of mind finds
final expression there. Consequently the affections and thoughts
of their minds are channeled to them. In this the operations of
their minds differ from those arising from other loves, loves
which do not extend to those organs.It follows in conclusion from this that as married love is in a
couple’s minds or spirits, such is it inwardly in the organs
belonging to it.Besides, it is evident in itself that a marriage of the spirit
after the wedding becomes also one of the body, thus complete.
Consequently, that if the marriage is chaste in spirit and draws
its quality from its sanctity in the spirit, it is of the same
character when it comes into its complete expression in the body;
and of the opposite character if the marriage in spirit is
unchaste.
- 310. [Marriage of the body]
- (15) This is the order and its steps by
which married love develops, from its first warmth to its first
fire.- 311. [The progression of love]
311. (15) Such is the order and its steps by which married love
develops, from its first warmth to its first fire. We say, from
its first warmth to its first fire, because the warmth of life is
love, and married warmth or love grows gradually until at last it
bursts into flame or fire. We say, to its first fire, because we
are referring to the first state following the wedding when this
love is set ablaze. But what it is like after that fire, during
the marriage itself, has already been described in previous
chapters; and in this section of the discussion we have just laid
out the course it follows from the initial starting point to this
its first terminus.[2] Every progression develops from initial elements to
concluding ones; and the last elements become the first in some
succeeding progression. So also, all the elements in an
intermediate progression are the concluding elements of a prior
progression and the first elements of a subsequent one; and thus
do ends continually proceed through causes to effects. This can be
demonstrated and illustrated satisfactorily to the sight of reason
from phenomena recognized and visible in the world. But because we
are dealing here with the proper order in which love progresses
from its first point to its realization, we pass these
considerations by and say on the subject only that as the
development of this love is from its first warmth to its first
fire, such is for the most part the development of it and the way
it progresses afterwards. For in that progression what the first
warmth was like within unveils itself. And if it was chaste, its
chastity becomes stronger in its progressions. But if it was
unchaste, its lack of chastity increases as it progresses, until
it is stripped of any chastity it had adopted outwardly from the
time of betrothal and failed to have within.
- 311. [The progression of love]
- (16) If married love is hastened prematurely
without an orderly development and its proper steps, it burns out
the marrows and dies.- 312. [Haste kills love]
312. (16) If married love is hastened prematurely without an
orderly development and its proper steps, it burns out the marrows
and dies. So I am told by some angels in heaven; and by marrows
they mean the inner elements of the mind and body. These are
burned out, which is to say, destroyed, if married love is
hastened prematurely, because that love then commences from a fire
that consumes and destroys those inmost recesses in which, as in
the places it begins, married love must have its seat and from
which it must originate. This is what happens if a man and woman
rush a marriage prematurely without an orderly development, not
looking to the Lord, not taking the counsel of reason, spurning
betrothal, and hearkening only to the flesh. If the heat of that
is the ardor from which love commences, it becomes an external
love and not an internal one, thus not married love; and this may
be termed the shell of love without its kernel, or a fleshly one
that is wasted and dry, because it is devoid of its genuine
essence.(For more on this subject see no. 305
above.)
- 312. [Haste kills love]
- (17) States of mind progress in a sequential
development, and in each partner these progressive states flow into
the state of their marriage – though with one progression in the
case of spiritual people and another in the case of people who are
natural.- 313. [State in betrothal influence the
marriage]313. (17) States of mind progress in a sequential development,
and in each partner these progressive states flow into the state
of their marriage – though with one progression in the case of
spiritual people and another in the case of people who are
natural. The concluding state in any progression has the character
of the sequential development by which it is formed and brought
into existence. This is a principle which ought to be acknowledged
in the educated world on account of its truth; for it enables us
to discover what influx is and how it operates. By influx we mean
everything that goes before in a series and which forms the next
element and then the next and through a succession of these the
concluding one. We may cite as an example everything that goes
before in a person and forms his wisdom. Or everything that goes
before in a statesman and forms his prudence. Or everything that
goes before in a theologian and forms his learning. Likewise
everything that progressively develops from infancy and forms the
adult. Also everything that progressively develops in succession
from the seed and sapling and makes the tree, and which afterwards
progressively develops from the flower and makes its fruit. In
similar manner, everything which goes before and progressively
develops in the case of a bride and groom and makes their
marriage. This is what we mean by influx.[2] The idea that all the elements that go before in people’s
minds form progressive series, that the series are tied together,
one alongside another and one after another, and that these
together form the concluding result, is something as yet unknown
in the world. But because it is a truth communicated from heaven,
we present it here. For it shows how influx operates and the
nature of its concluding result, in which the elements of the
progressively formed series as just described come together and
coexist.It can be seen from this that states of mind progress in a
sequential development, and that in married partners these
progressive states flow into the state of their marriage. After
they are married, however, the partners are totally unaware of the
successive elements that have been implanted and are present in
their spirits from preceding states. But yet it is those elements
which shape their married love and form the state of their minds
from which they comport themselves with each other.[3] It follows that one state is formed from one progression in
the case of spiritual people, and another in the case of people
who are natural, because spiritual people proceed in a proper and
orderly progression, and natural people in an improper and
disorderly one. For spiritual people look to the Lord, and the
Lord oversees and guides an orderly progression. But natural
people look to themselves, and so proceed in an inverted
progression. Consequently their married state is inwardly full of
elements that are unchaste; and the more numerous the unchaste
elements, the more numerous their states of coldness, and the more
numerous their states of coldness, the more numerous the
obstructions to their intimacy of life, which block up its passage
and dry up its source.
- 313. [State in betrothal influence the
- (18) For everywhere one finds a sequential
order and a concurrent order, and the concurrent order evolves from
the sequential order and in accordance with it.- 314. [Sequential and concurrent order]
314. (18) For everywhere one finds a sequential order and a
concurrent order, and the concurrent order evolves from the
sequential order and in accordance with it. We cite this in
explanation and corroboration of the preceding discussion.People know the difference between a sequential arrangement and
a concurrent one, but they do not know that any instance of
concurrent order evolves from a sequential one and in accordance
with it. It is at the same time very difficult to present to human
perception how sequential elements project themselves into
concurrent ones, and the kind of order they form there, since the
learned do not have among them as yet any theory serving to
explain the concept. So, because an initial idea of this secret
cannot be conveyed in a few words, and to interject one at length
here would distract people’s minds from a more uncluttered view of
married love, the following may suffice to illustrate the matter.
These brief observations concerning the two kinds of order,
sequential and concurrent, and the influx of the first into the
second, were presented in The Doctrine of the New Jerusalem
Regarding the Sacred Scripture, which we repeat from there:[*1][2] Everywhere in heaven and in the world we find a sequential
order and a concurrent order. In sequential order one
thing…follows after another from the highest elements to the
lowest. In concurrent order, however, one thing exists alongside
another from the inmost elements to the outmost. Sequential order
is like a column with descending levels from top to bottom, while
concurrent order is like a continuous piece of work…from center
to surface….…sequential order becomes concurrent in its concluding
element…in the following way. The highest elements in the
sequential order become the inmost elements of the concurrent
order; and the lowest elements in the sequential order become the
outmost elements of the concurrent order. It may be likened to a
column with descending levels sinking down to become a continuous
mass on the same plane.That is how a concurrent arrangement is formed from sequential
elements; and this in each and every thing of the spiritual world,
and in each and every thing of the natural world.See in that work nos. 38, 65;
and still more on the same subject in Angelic Wisdom Regarding
Divine Love and Wisdom, nos. 205-229.[3] It is similar with the sequential progression leading to
marriage, and the concurrent set of elements in marriage; namely,
that the latter results from the former and in accordance with it.(One who is acquainted with the way sequential order flows into
a concurrent one can understand why it is that angels are able to
see all the thoughts and intentions of a person’s mind in his
hand.[*2] And also that wives sense their husband’s affections
from the touch of the husbands’ hands upon their breasts – a
phenomenon that has been mentioned several times in the narrative
accounts.[*3] The reason is that the hands are a person’s terminal
parts, into which the deliberations and resolutions of his mind
are directed and where they form a concomitant presence. That too
is why we find it said in the Word that this or that was written
on the hands.[*4])[*1] I.e., from no. 38.
[*2] Cf. no. 261:3 at the end.
[*3] See no. 155[r]:4. Other mentions
of wives’ sensing from the touch of the hands refer to a wife’s
doing so by touching her husband with her hand.[*4] See Exodus 13:9,16; Deuteronomy 6:8, 11:18; Isaiah 49:16;
Revelation 13:16, 14:9, 20:4; also Job 31:7. Cf. Psalms 7:3, 24:4;
also Job 11:14.
- 314. [Sequential and concurrent order]
- A discussion of what the soul is and the
nature of it (no. 315).- 315. [What the soul is]
315. To this I will append two narrative accounts. Here is the
first:I once saw, not far from me, an atmospheric wonder. I saw a
cloud break up into smaller clouds, some of them light blue, and
some dark; and as I watched they seemed to be colliding into each
other. Rays of light began to flash in streaks between them,
appearing now as sharp as rapiers, now blunted like swords broken.
One moment these streaks would race out to strike, the next moment
retreat back, altogether like boxers. These different colored
little clouds thus looked as though they were fighting with each
other, but in sport.Now because this phenomenon appeared not far from me, I raised
my eyes and looked more intently; and I saw boys, young men and
older men going into a house, which was built out of marble with a
foundation of porphyry. It was over this house that that
phenomenon was occurring.I then spoke to one of the people going in and asked what was
happening there.To that he replied, “It is a school where young men are
introduced into various matters having to do with wisdom.”[2] Hearing this, and being in the spirit, that is, in a state
like that of people in the spiritual world, who are called spirits
and angels, I went in with them. And behold, in that school I saw
up front a ceremonial chair; in the central part a number of
benches; around the sides some more seats; and over the entrance a
balcony. The ceremonial chair was for the young men when it became
their turn to respond to the question that would then be put to
them. The benches were for those who were there to listen. The
seats along the sides were for those who had already answered
wisely on previous occasions. And the balcony was for the older
men who would be the referees and judges. In the middle of the
balcony stood a dais, where a wise man sat whom they called
Headmaster; it was he who posed the questions for the young men to
respond to from the ceremonial chair.So then, after all were assembled, the man rose from his dais
and said, “Please give your reply now to the following
question and explain it if you can: What is the soul, and what is
the nature of it?”[3] On hearing this they were all stunned and began to murmur.
And some in the throng on the benches cried out, “What
person, from the age of Saturn to our present time, has been able,
by any deliberation of reason, to see and lay hold of what the
soul is, not to mention what the nature of it is. Is this not
beyond the realm of anyone’s understanding?”However, to that the men in the balcony replied, “It is
not beyond human understanding, but within its scope and ability
to see. Just respond to the question.”So the young men chosen to ascend the chair that day and
respond to the question stood up. There were five of them, whom
the older men had examined and found proficient in intelligence,
and who were then sitting on long, cushioned seats to the sides of
the ceremonial chair. Moreover, these afterwards ascended the
chair in the order in which they were seated; and as each one
ascended it, he would put on a tunic of opal-colored silk, and
over that a gown of soft wool inwoven with flowers, and in
addition a cap whose peak bore a rosette surrounded by little
sapphires.[4] Accordingly I saw the first one thus dressed ascend the
chair. And he said, “What the soul is and what the nature of
it is has not been revealed to anyone from the time of creation,
being a secret locked away in repositories belonging to God alone.
Only this much has been disclosed, that the soul dwells in a
person like a queen. But where her court is, this a number of
learned seers have guessed at. Some have supposed that it is
located in the little protuberance between the cerebrum and
cerebellum called the pineal gland. They have imagined the seat of
the soul to be there on the ground that a person is governed in
his entirety by the cerebrum and cerebellum, which in turn are
directed by that gland; consequently that that which directs those
two parts of the brain to its bidding also directs the entire
person from head to heel.”But he said, “Although this appeared as true or likely to
many in the world, in a later age it was rejected as a fiction.”[5] After he had spoken, he took off the gown, tunic and cap,
and the second of the young men selected put them on and placed
himself in the chair. His statement concerning the soul was as
follows:“No one, in all of heaven and in all the world, knows what
the soul is and what the nature of it is. We know only that it
exists, and that it exists in a person; but where is a matter of
conjecture. This much is certain, that it exists in the head,
since that is where the intellect thinks and where the will wills,
and it is there in the face in the forepart of the head that a
person’s five senses are located. Nothing else gives life to these
but the soul which is seated somewhere inside the head. But where
exactly its court is there I would not venture to say, though I
have agreed at different times with those who assign it a seat in
the three ventricles of the brain, with those put it in the
corpora striata there, with those who put it in the medullary
substance of the cerebrum and cerebellum, with those who put it in
the cortical substance, and at times with those who put it in the
dura mater; for arguments have not been lacking to prompt
affirmative votes, so to speak, in support of each of these as the
seat.[6] “Some people have voted in favor of the three
ventricles of the brain on the ground that they are receptacles of
all the brain’s animating essences and fluids. Some have voted in
favor of the corpora striata on the ground that they form the
medulla through which the nerves exit and through which the
cerebrum and cerebellum are continued into the spine, from which
medulla and spine issue the fibers of which the whole body is
woven. Some have voted in favor of the medullary substance of the
cerebrum and cerebellum on the ground that it is a conglomeration
and mass of all the fibers which constitute the initial elements
of the entire person. Some have voted in favor of the cortical
substance on the ground that this is where the first and last
terminations of a person are, from which come the beginnings of
all the fibers and thus of all sensations and movements. Still
others have voted in favor of the dura mater on the ground that it
is the overall covering of the entire brain, and extends from
there by a kind of continuation around the heart and other
internal organs of the body.“For my part, I do not think any more of one theory than
another. I leave it to you to please judge for yourselves and pick
which is better.”[7] So saying he descended from the chair and handed the tunic,
gown and cap to the third one in line; and mounting the chair the
third young man made the following response:“What business do I have at my young age with so lofty a
subject? I appeal to the learned gentlemen sitting here at the
sides. I appeal to you wiser men in the balcony. Indeed, I appeal
to the angels of the highest heaven. Can anyone, by any rational
light of his own, gain for himself any idea of the soul?“As for its seat in a person, however, concerning this I
can, like the others, offer a speculation. And I speculate that it
is in the heart and from that in the blood. I come to this
speculation because the heart by its blood governs both body and
head; for it sends out the great artery called the aorta to the
whole of the body, and the arteries called the carotids to the
whole of the head. It is universally agreed therefore that it is
from the heart by means of the blood that the soul sustains,
nourishes and animates the entire organic system of both body and
head.“Adding to the plausibility of this assertion is the fact
that the Holy Scripture so often mentions the soul and heart – as
for example that you should love God with all your soul and with
all your heart, and that God creates in man a new soul and new
heart (Deuteronomy 6:5, 10:12, 11:13, 26:16; Jeremiah 32:41;
Matthew 22:37; Mark 12:30,33; Luke 10:27; and elsewhere[*1]); and
saying straight out that the blood is the soul of the flesh
(Leviticus 17:11,14).”When they heard this, some of them lifted up their voice,
saying, “Masterful! Masterful!” – they being members of
the clergy.[8] After that the fourth in line took from him the vestments
and put them on, and having placed himself in the chair, said:“I, too, suspect that no one is possessed of such fine and
polished genius that he can discern what the soul is and what the
nature of it is. I judge accordingly that anyone who tries to
investigate it only wastes the cleverness of his intellect in vain
endeavors. Nevertheless, from childhood I have maintained a belief
in an opinion held by the ancients, that a person’s soul dwells in
his whole being and in every part of it, thus that it dwells both
in the head and its individual parts and in the body and its
individual parts; and that it was a conceit invented by modern
thinkers to assign it a seat here or there and not everywhere. The
soul is furthermore a spiritual essence, to which is ascribed
neither dimension nor location but indwelling and repleteness.
Who, too, does not mean life when he refers to the soul? And does
life not exist in the whole and in every part?”At these words, many in the hall expressed approval.
[9] After him the fifth speaker arose, and outfitted in the
same regalia, he presented from the chair the following statement:“I do not take the time to say where the soul is – whether
it resides in any one part or everywhere in the whole; but from my
fund and store of knowledge I will declare my mind on the question
of what the soul is and what the nature of it is. No one thinks of
the soul except as a pure entity which may be likened to ether,
air or wind, in which the vital force is from the rationality
which human beings have over animals. I base this opinion on the
fact that when a person expires or breathes his last, he is said
to give up the ghost or soul. For this reason the soul that lives
after death is also believed to be such an exhalation, in which is
the cognitive life which we call the soul. What else can the soul
be?“However, because I heard you men in the balcony say that
the question of the soul – what it is and what the nature of it is
– is not beyond human understanding but within its scope and
ability to see, I ask and implore you to lay open this eternal
mystery yourselves.”[10] At that the older men in the balcony looked at the
headmaster who had posed the question. And understanding from the
motions of their heads that they wished him to go down and
explain, he immediately descended from his dais, crossed the hall
and placed himself in the chair. Then stretching out his hand
there he said:“Pay attention, please. Who does not believe the soul to
be the inmost and finest essence of a person? And what is an
essence without a form other than a figment of the imagination?
The soul therefore is a form; but what the nature of the form is
remains to be told. It is a form embracing all elements of love
and all elements of wisdom. We call all the elements of love
affections; and we call all the elements of wisdom perceptions.
These perceptions, flowing from the affections and thus together
with them, constitute a single form, which contains an endless
number of constituent elements in such an order, series and
connection that they may be said to be one and indivisible. They
may be said to be one and indivisible because nothing can be taken
from the whole or added to it without changing its character. What
else is the human soul but such a form? Are not all the elements
of love and all the elements of wisdom in a person the essential
constituents of that form, these being in the soul, and in the
head and body from the soul?[11] “You are called spirits and angels, and in the world
you believed that spirits and angels were like bits of wind or
ether and so were disembodied minds and hearts. But now you
clearly see that you are truly, really and actually whole people –
people who in the world lived and thought in a material body, and
who knew then that the material body does not live and think, but
the spiritual essence in that body, which you called the soul
whose form you did not know. And yet now you have seen it and do
see it. You are all souls, whose immortality you have heard,
thought, spoken and written so much about. And it is because you
are forms of love and wisdom from God that you can never hereafter
die.“So then, the soul is a human form, from which nothing can
be taken away, and to which nothing can be added, and it is the
inmost form in all the forms of the entire person. Moreover,
because the forms which exist outwardly take both their essence
and their form from the inmost one, therefore you, as you appear
to yourselves and to us, are souls.“The soul, in short, is the person himself, because it is
the innermost person. Consequently its form is a fully and
perfectly human form. Yet it is not life, but the most immediate
recipient vessel of life from God and thus the dwelling place of
God.”[12] At this many in the hall applauded; but some said, “We
will have to think about it.”I then departed for home; and lo, over that school, in place of
the earlier phenomenon, I saw a white cloud without the rays or
streaks of light combating with each other. Then, penetrating
through the roof, the cloud entered the hall and lighted up the
walls; and I heard that they saw inscriptions, and included among
them also this one:Jehovah God breathed into the man’s nostrils the breath of
life,[*2] and the man became a living soul. (Genesis 2:7)[*1] E.g. Deuteronomy 30:6; Psalms 51:10; Ezekiel 11:19.
[*2] Literally, soul of life. Hebrew: breath, spirit.
- 315. [What the soul is]
- A garden where a discourse occurred on the
subject of Divine providence in relation to marriages (no. 316).- 316. [Divine providence in marriages]
316. The second account:
Walking once with tranquil heart in a pleasantly peaceful state
of mind, I saw in the distance a wood, which had in the midst of
it an enclosed path leading to a little palace; and I saw young
women and men and husbands and wives going in. I, too, in the
spirit went over there, and I asked one of the keepers standing at
the entrance of the path whether I might go in as well. He stared
at me; and so I asked, “Why are you staring at me?”“I am examining you,” he replied, “to see
whether the pleasant state of peace reflected in your face draws
any of its character from a pleasant delight in married love.
After this path there is a little garden, and in the middle of it
a house with a newly married couple in it. Their friends are
coming here today to wish them happiness and joy. I do not know
the people I am allowing to enter, but I was told I would
recognize them from their faces. If I saw in them a delight in
married love, I was to let them in, and no one else.”Every angel can see from others’ faces what the delights of
their heart are; and because I was thinking about married love, it
was a delight in that love that he saw in my face. This
contemplation of mine shone from my eyes and lent an inner glow to
my face, so that he told me I might go in.[2] The enclosed path through which I went was lined with fruit
trees joined together by interlocking branches, thus forming an
unbroken wall of trees on either side. Through this pathway I
entered the little garden, which exhaled a pleasant fragrance from
its bushes and flowers. The bushes and flowers grew in pairs; and
I learned that gardens of this sort appear around houses where
weddings are being or have been celebrated, on which account they
are called wedding gardens.After that I went into the house, and there I saw the married
couple holding each other by the hand and speaking to each other
out of true married love. Moreover, from their faces I was given
to see then an image of married love, and from their conversation,
its vibrancy.Later, when I among many others had expressed my prayers for
them and wished them happiness and joy, I went out into the
wedding garden; and I saw on the right side of it a group of young
men, to which all who left the house went hurrying over. They all
hurried over there because they were having a conversation about
married love, and this conversation drew the hearts of all with a
kind of hidden force to it. I listened then to a wise person in
the group speaking about that love, and what I heard was in
summary the following:[3] “The Lord’s Divine providence is most specific and
therefore most universal in connection with marriages and in its
operation in marriages in heaven, because all blessings of heaven
flow from the delights of married love, like sweet waters from a
sweetly gushing spring. It is therefore provided by the Lord that
marital pairs be born, and they are raised and continually
prepared for their marriages, neither the boy nor the girl being
aware of the fact. Then, after a period of time, the girl – now a
marriageable young woman – and the boy – now a young man able to
marry – meet somewhere, as though by fate, and notice each other.
And they immediately recognize, as if by a kind of instinct, that
they are a match, thinking to themselves from a kind of inner
dictate, the young man, “she is mine,” and the young
woman, “he is mine.” Later, after this thought has for
some time become settled in the minds of each, they deliberately
talk about it together and pledge themselves to each other in
marriage.“We say as though by fate and as if by instinct, when we
mean by Divine providence, because when one is unaware that it is
Divine providence, that is how it appears.”With respect to his statement that marital pairs are born,
raised and prepared for their marriages without their knowing, the
speaker supported it by the marital similarity visible in the
faces of a couple, also by the innermost and eternal union of
their hearts and minds, neither of which would be possible the way
they are in heaven unless foreseen and provided by the Lord.[4] Having said this – to which the group responded with
applause – the wise person speaking went on to say that there is a
conjugal element in the smallest particulars in every person, both
male and female; only that the conjugal element in the male and
the conjugal element in the female are not the same, but the
conjugal element of the male possesses a capacity for conjunction
with the conjugal element of the female, and vice versa, even in
the least particulars.This he showed by the marriage of will and understanding in
every individual, the two of which operate together in the least
constituents of the mind and in the least constituents of the
body; from which it can be seen that there is a conjugal element
in each component, even the least. “This is also made
evident,” he said, “from the composite organs of the
body which are formed from its elemental constituents. We find,
for example, two eyes, two ears, two nostrils, two cheeks, two
lips, two arms and hands, two legs, two feet; and inside the body,
two hemispheres of the brain, two ventricles of the heart, two
lungs, two kidneys, two testicles. Even when an organ is not
paired, still it exhibits a division into two parts. The reason
there are these sets of two is that one is connected with the will
and the other with the intellect, which operate in conjunction
with each other so marvelously that they give the appearance of
being one. Thus the two eyes produce one power of sight, the two
ears one power of hearing, the two nostrils one sense of smell,
the two lips one speech, the two hands one labor, the two feet one
gait, the two hemispheres of the brain one habitation of the mind,
the two chambers of the heart one life of the body through the
blood, the two lungs one respiration, and so on. Only that in the
case of a married couple, the masculine element and feminine
element united by true married love produce one life that is fully
human.”[5] As he was saying this, a shaft of lightning appeared in the
sky to our right having a red color, and another shaft of
lightning to our left that was white, neither of them very
intense. These entered through our eyes into our minds and
illumined them as well. Then, following these, we heard the sound
of thunder – in actuality a low murmur coming from the angelic
heaven and growing louder in its descent.Hearing it, and having seen the lightning, the wise person
speaking said, “These are meant for me as a signal and
admonition to add to my discussion something further, that in the
twinned pairs of organs I have mentioned, the one on the right
symbolizes the good connected with the two, and the one on the
left the truth connected with them; and that this is owing to the
marriage of good and truth engraved on each person in his whole
being and in his every least part, good having relation to the
will and truth to the understanding, and the two together to a
union of these. For this reason, in heaven “the right eye”
means the good connected with sight, and “the left eye”
the truth connected with it. So, too, “the right ear”
means the good connected with hearing, and “the left ear”
the truth connected with it. Similarly, “the right hand”
means the good connected with a person’s strength, and “the
left hand” the truth connected with it. And so on with the
rest of these twinned pairs.“Moreover, because “right” and “left”
have these symbolic associations, the Lord said:If your right eye causes you to slip, pluck it out…. And if
your right hand causes you to slip, cut it off….[*1]“He meant by this that if something good is turned to
evil, it should be cast away.“For the same reason He also told His disciples to cast
their net on the right side of the boat, and when they did so,
they caught a great number of fish.[*2] And by this He meant they
should teach the good of charity, and by doing so would gather in
people.”[6] Following these remarks, the two shafts of lightning
appeared again, still less intense than before. And we saw then
that the lightning on the left drew the whiteness of its light
from the reddish fire of the lightning on the right.Seeing this, the speaker said, “It is a sign from heaven
confirming what I have said, because something fiery in heaven
means something good, and something white there means something
true. As for our having seen that the lightning on the left drew
the whiteness of its light from the reddish fire of the lightning
on the right, this is visible evidence that the whiteness of light
or light itself is nothing other than the luminance of fire.”At the end of this discourse, all in the group were fired with
a joyful state of goodness and truth inspired by the shafts of
lightning and what they had been told concerning them, and in this
state they departed for home.[*1] Matthew 5:29,30.
[*2] John 21:6.
- 316. [Divine providence in marriages]
-
- 317. SECOND MARRIAGES
-
- 317. [SECOND MARRIAGES]
It may possibly come into consideration whether married love,
which is a love between one man and one wife, can, after the death
of a partner, be severed, or transferred, or overlaid with another.
Also, whether second marriages share any common characteristic with
polygamy, and thus whether they may be termed a serial form of
polygamy. And many other questions besides, which in the minds of
reasoners tend regularly to intervene with one moral scruple after
another. Therefore, to inform masters of casuistry who reason in
darkness about such marriages and to enable them to see some light,
I thought it would be useful to present to their judgment the
following points on the subject, which are:(1) Whether to marry again after the death of a partner depends
on the married love had previously.(2) It depends also on the status of the marriage in which they
had been living.(3) In the case of people who did not have true married love,
nothing hinders or prevents them from marrying again.(4) People who before had lived with their partners in a state
of true married love do not wish to marry again, except for reasons
dissociated from married love.(5) The marriage of an inexperienced man with a virgin differs
in state from the marriage of an inexperienced man with a widow.(6) The marriage of a widower with a virgin likewise differs in
state from the marriage of a widower with a widow.(7) The various and diverse natures of these marriages in
respect to the love in them and its character are altogether beyond
number.(8) The state of a widow is harder than the state of a widower.
Explanation of these statements now follows.
- 317. [SECOND MARRIAGES]
- (1) Whether to marry again after the death
of a partner depends on the married love had previously.- 318. [Whether to marry again depends on the
previous love]318. (1) Whether to marry again after the death of a partner
depends on the married love had previously. True married love is
the balance, so to speak, against which inclinations to remarry
are weighed. The nearer the married love had previously is to true
married love, the more removed is an inclination to marry again;
whereas the more removed the previous love is from true married
love, the more present usually is an inclination towards
remarriage.The reason is clear to see, because married love is in the same
measure a conjunction of minds, and the conjunction remains during
the bodily life of the one after the passing of the other. This
conjunction holds any inclination to remarry in balance as though
in a scale, and tips the scale its way to the degree that true
love has been embraced. (Though because rarely does anyone today
progress more than a few steps towards such a love, therefore the
tongue of the balance for the most part rises to the point of
equilibrium, and wavering there, goes over to the other side, that
is, to the side of remarriage.)[2] The converse is the case with people whose love before in
the previous marriage departed from true married love. That is
because a departure from it is in the same measure a disjunction
of minds, and the disjunction likewise remains during the bodily
life of the one after the passing of the other. This disjunction
enters a will estranged from the will of the other and engenders
an inclination towards a new union. Thought then in that
direction, prompted by an inclination of the will, introduces hope
of a more united and thus more congenial cohabitation.[3] It is common knowledge that inclinations to marry again
arise in accordance with the state of the love had before; and
this reason also sees. For inherent in true married love is a fear
of its being lost, and following its loss, grief – a fear and
grief which occupy the innermost recesses of people’s minds.
Consequently, to the degree these emotions are present as a result
of that love, to the same degree the soul, in both thought and
will, and so in intention, inclines to remain with the person with
whom and in whom it was. It follows from this that the mind is
held counterbalanced against a second marriage according to the
degree of the love which it had before. So it is that the same
partners are reunited after death and love each other again as in
the world.However, as indicated above, such a love today is rare, and
there are few who touch it with even a finger. People who do not
attain it, and still more those who depart far from it – according
as they wished for separation in their married life before (which
was cold), so after the death of the partner they wish for union
with another.But we will say more about these two classes of people in what
follows.
- 318. [Whether to marry again depends on the
- (2) It depends also on the status of the
marriage in which they had been living.- 319. [External circumstances]
319. (2) Whether to marry again after the death of a partner
depends also on the status of the marriage in which they had been
living. By the status of the marriage we do not mean the state of
the love which we took up under the preceding heading, because the
state of the love engenders an inclination for or against
remarriage that is internal. By the status of the marriage we mean
rather its circumstances which occasion an external inclination
for or against. Such circumstances together with their resulting
inclinations are manifold. For example:1. If there are little children in the house and a new mother
must be found for them.2. If there is an earnest desire for still more children.
3. If the house is large and equipped with servants of both
sexes.4. If constant responsibilities outside the house divert the
mind from domestic concerns at home, and trouble and misfortune
are feared on that account without a new mistress.5. If there is need for joint assistance and shared duties, as
is the case in a variety of businesses and trades.6. It depends, moreover, on the nature of the partner who is
left, whether after the first marriage he or she can or cannot
live alone or without a mate.7. The previous marriage also imparts either a fear of married
life or a preference for it.8. I have been told that polygamous love and sexual desire,
including a lust to deflower and a lust for variety, have led the
hearts of some to a desire to remarry. Also that fear of the law
and fear for their reputation if they were to go awhoring have led
the hearts of others to it.There are in addition many other circumstances which induce
external inclinations towards remarriage.
- 319. [External circumstances]
- (3) In the case of people who did not have
true married love, nothing hinders or prevents them from marrying
again.- 320. [If there was no real love, they can
remarry]320. (3) In the case of people who did not have true married
love, nothing hinders or prevents them from marrying again. In
people who did not have married love there is no spiritual or
inner bond, but only a natural or outer one; and if an inner bond
does not hold the outer one in its order and course, it does not
last. It is like a sash with its fastening undone, which slips
away with a toss of the shoulders or gust of wind. That is because
the natural bond takes its origin from a spiritual one, and in its
development is nothing else than an assemblage compiled of
spiritual elements. If therefore the natural bond is separated
from its spiritual one, which produced it and so to speak gave
birth to it, it is no longer held together inwardly but only
outwardly, by a spiritual bond which surrounds it and binds it in
general, but does not secure it and keep it secured in particular.
Consequently, a natural bond separated from a spiritual one
between two married partners does not bring about any conjunction
of their minds, and so neither of their wills, but only a
conjunction of some external affections which are connected with
their physical senses.[2] In such cases nothing hinders or prevents the partners from
being able to marry again, because the essential ties of marriage
are missing in them, and so neither are any present in them after
they are separated by death. Therefore they are then at complete
liberty to be bound as to their sensual affections with another –
if a widower, with any woman, and if a widow, with any man, as
they please and as is lawful. They themselves do not think of
marriage in anything but natural terms, and in terms of its
advantages for the sake of various external necessities and
benefits, which after the death of one may be restored again by
another person in place of the former. Moreover, if by chance
their inner thoughts were to be seen (as they are in the spiritual
world), they would be found to make no distinction between marital
unions and liaisons entered into apart from marriage.[3] People of this sort may marry again and again, for the
reason just given, because merely natural conjunctions after death
are dissolved of themselves and fade away. For in death external
affections follow the body and are buried with it, and only those
remain which are connected with internal ones.It must be known, however, that interiorly conjunctive
marriages can be entered into with difficulty on earth, because
choices based on internal similarities cannot be provided by the
Lord there as they are in heaven. For choices on earth are limited
in many ways, such as to people one’s equals in station and
condition, in the area, city or town where one lives; and it is
largely external qualities that draw them together there, and thus
not internal ones. Internal qualities come out only after a period
of marriage, and are known only as they inject themselves into
external ones.
- 320. [If there was no real love, they can
- (4) People who before had lived with their
partners in a state of true married love do not wish to marry again,
except for reasons dissociated from married love.- 321. [If there was true love, they don’t want
to marry another]321. (4) People who before had lived with their partners in a
state of true married love do not wish to marry again, except for
reasons dissociated from married love. People who before had lived
in a state of true married love do not wish to marry again after
the death of their partner for the following reasons:1. Because they have been united in respect to their souls and
so in respect to their minds; and this union, being a spiritual
one, is an actual coupling of the soul and mind of one to the soul
and mind of the other, which cannot in any way be dissolved. (That
this is the nature of spiritual union we have already shown here
and there previously.)[2] 2. Because they have been united also in respect to their
bodies, by the wife’s reception of the propagations of the
husband’s soul, and thus by an implantation of his life in hers,
by which a maiden becomes a wife; and conversely by the husband’s
reception of the wife’s married love, which disposes the inner
faculties of his mind and at the same time the inner and outer
faculties of his body into a state capable of receiving love and
perceiving wisdom, a state which turns him from a youth into a
husband (on which subject, see nos. 198, 199
above).[3] 3. Because an atmosphere of her love continues to emanate
from the wife, and an atmosphere of his intellect from the
husband; and this perfects the bonds between them, and with its
pleasant ambience surrounds them and unites them (again, see
above, no. 223).[4] 4. Because married partners so united think of and yearn
for eternity in their marriage, and eternal happiness for them is
founded on that idea (see no. 216).[5] 5. Because in consequence of the foregoing they are no
longer two but one person, that is, one flesh.[6] 6. Because such a oneness cannot be sundered by the death
of the other partner – a fact manifestly evident to visual sight
in the spirit.[7] To these reasons we will add this new one:
7. Because the two are not actually separated by the death of
one; for the spirit of the deceased continues to dwell with the
spirit of the one not yet deceased, and this until the death of
the other, at which time they come together again and are
reunited, loving each other even more tenderly than before,
because they are in the spiritual world.From these circumstances comes the following inevitable result,
that people who before had lived in a state of true married love
do not wish to marry again.If they nevertheless do afterwards enter into something like a
marriage, it is for reasons dissociated from married love; and
these reasons are all external ones. As for example: If there are
little children in the house and there is need to provide for
their care. If the house is a large one, equipped with servants of
both sexes. If responsibilities outside the house divert the mind
from domestic concerns at home. If there is need for joint
assistance and shared duties. And other like reasons.
- 321. [If there was true love, they don’t want
- (5) The marriage of an inexperienced man
with a virgin differs in state from the marriage of an inexperienced
man with a widow.- 322. [The true beginning to the genuine
marriage]322. (5) The marriage of an inexperienced man with a virgin
differs in state from the marriage of an inexperienced man with a
widow. By states of marriage we mean the states of each partner’s
life, of the husband and wife, after the wedding, thus in their
marriage such as their life together is then, whether it is an
internal one involving their souls and minds (which is the
principal idea in what it is to share a life), or whether it is
only an external one connected with their dispositions, senses and
body.The state in the marriage of an inexperienced man with a virgin
is the true beginning state to a genuine marriage; for advancing
from first warmth to first fire, and then from first seed on the
part of the inexperienced husband and first bloom on the part of
the virgin wife, married love is able to proceed between them in
its proper progression, and thus sprout, grow and come to fruition
and introduce them into its states together. Otherwise the
inexperienced man was not an inexperienced man, nor the virgin a
virgin, except in outward appearance.Between an inexperienced man and a widow, however, there is not
the same initiation from first beginnings to marriage, nor the
same progression in marriage, since a widow is more her own
mistress and more independent than a single woman. An
inexperienced man accordingly pays court to a widowed wife with a
different regard than he would a virgin wife. Such marriages,
however, exhibit much variety and diversity, and therefore we
mention only this common characteristic.
- 322. [The true beginning to the genuine
- (6) The marriage of a widower with a virgin
likewise differs in state from the marriage of a widower with a
widow.- 323. [Mutual introduction]
323. (6) The marriage of a widower with a virgin likewise
differs in state from the marriage of a widower with a widow. The
reason is that the widower has been introduced into married life
already, while the virgin still needs to be introduced; and yet
married love perceives and feels its pleasure and delight in a
mutual introduction. An inexperienced husband and inexperienced
wife perceive and feel always something new in the states that
befall them, on which account they encounter a kind of continual
introduction and consequent lovely progression. The state is
different in the marriage of a widower with a virgin. The virgin
wife feels an inner yearning, which in the man has passed. But in
marriages of this sort there is much variety and diversity,
likewise in the marriage between a widower and widow; and
therefore we cannot add anything more specific beyond this general
observation.
- 323. [Mutual introduction]
- (7) The various and diverse natures of these
marriages in respect to the love in them and its character are
altogether beyond number.- 324. [Countless varieties]
324. (7) The various and diverse natures of these marriages in
respect to the love in them and its character are altogether
beyond number. In all things we find an infinite variety and also
an infinite diversity. By variety here we mean variations among
things which are of the same kind or same type, also variations in
kinds and types, whereas by diversity here were mean disparities
between things which are in contrast to each other. We can
illustrate our concept of the difference between variety and
diversity by the following example:The angelic heaven hangs together as a unified whole, yet it
exhibits an infinite variety, in that no two people there are ever
entirely alike – not in their souls and minds, nor in their
affections, perceptions and consequent thoughts, nor in their
inclinations and consequent intentions, nor in the sounds of their
voices, facial features, physical characteristics, gestures or
manner of walk. But still, even though there are millions of them,
they have been organized and are continually being organized by
the Lord into a single body, in which there is complete unanimity
and harmony. This would not be possible except for the fact that
all those various sorts of people are led, universally and
individually, by the same one God. That is what we mean here by
variety.[2] By diversity, on the other hand, we mean the differences in
contrast to those varieties which exist in hell. For the people
there are collectively and individually diametrically opposite to
those who are in heaven, and the hell formed of them is held
together as a unified whole by variations among them completely
contrary to the variations in heaven, thus by their perpetual
disparities.This shows what is implied by infinite variety and infinite
diversity. It is the same with marriages, in that there are
infinite variations among partners who are in a state of married
love, and infinite variations among those who are in a state of
licentious love; and consequently infinite disparities between the
former and the latter.It follows as a conclusion from this that variations and
disparities in marriages of whatever kind and type – whether they
be marriages of an inexperienced man and a virgin, of an
inexperienced man with a widow, of a widower with a virgin, or of
a widower with a widow – are altogether beyond number. Who can
divide infinity into finite numbers?
- 324. [Countless varieties]
- (8) The state of a widow is harder than the
state of a widower.
-
- 1. THE JOYS OF HEAVEN AND MARRIAGES THERE